Carrie-Ann Kloda

Once upon a time, I created a DOC Hiring Guide… and it’s so good, I just can’t gatekeep it any longer.

In this episode, I’m sharing everything I know about day-of coordination, which is a lot. After all, I have been doing it for almost 20 years! I’m telling you:

1️⃣ What does she/they do?
2️⃣ What should you expect to pay based on their experience/the industry standards?
3️⃣ Red Flags 🚩🚩🚩
4️⃣ Should you just ask a friend to do it?
5️⃣ Questions to ask when interviewing DOC’s
6️⃣ Best practices for working with your DOC
7️⃣ How to share your wedding plan with your DOC/how I transfer the power as your long-distance planning coach (reach out to see if I can do a custom coaching package for you and your beloved!)

Can’t wait to hear if you have questions… even though I’m pretty sure you won’t 😂

On this glorious Trans Day of Visibility, I’m throwing it back to the one and only styled shoot I have ever done, featuring my dear friends Charlie (they/them) and Talia (she/her).

I love this photo because Charlie is so goddamn talented as a performer, and I can see Talia’s real feelings even if she’s intentionally blurry in this photo. That’s what happens when you invite a Drag King and Burlesque powerhouse out to play!

If you’re trans, if you’re q***r, if you’re nervous about getting married because you don’t feel seen or represented by the wedding industry, you are not alone. It’s my dream to help create a day where you can feel safely visible, and to make your planning experience supremely joyful.

I know that regular life has been jarring, full of rude wake up calls every time you start to feel comfortable, and I want your experience working with me to feel like a warm, supportive, consensual hug.

It’s possible. It’s right at our fingertips - a safer space for marriers, and a safer planet for trans kids. Show your allyship and make trans folks visible on your feed and in your stories - and not just today.

Styled Shoot Vendors Pictured:
PLANNER/PROJECT MANAGER .theweddingcoach
FLORIST + EVENT DESIGN
PHOTOGRAPHER .love
MODELS +
DRESS, JUMPSUIT, + VEIL JEWELRY .bijoux
FOOTWEAR
MAKEUP ARTIST
HAIR STYLIST
VENUE
RENTALS +
RIBBON

***rwedding ***rowned ***rcommunity 🏳️‍⚧️

I had the absolute honour of sitting down with my *brilliant* friend N. Chloé Nwangwu - a brand scientist with a background in international conflict resolution.

If you haven’t heard expressions like “the invisibility tax” or “underrecognition”, you need to be paying attention to the work Chloé is doing!

We talked about why your brand values are important but also why nuance is important in conversations around values, and whether having that nuance will allow you to maintain your audience’s ear and effect more positive and progressive change.

We also talked about a ton of other stuff…

🎯 Maintaining boundaries when doing emotional labour, and what that looks like versus what happens when you don’t do that (as a wedding vendor)
🎯 Never Have I Ever and Mindy Kaling’s general greatness
🎯 Why being a woman in a “female-dominated industry” isn’t all it’s cracked up to be when we’re still operating under patriarchal, white-supremacist, and highly capitalist systems
🎯 The S.N.I.F.F. test for vendors to help you figure out if your marketing is feminist, and how you can improve it.

Comment POD and I’ll send you a link to the episode!

A month-by-month breakdown of my 6-month wedding planning method!

*Note: This plan happens after a period of enjoying your engagement, and after you’ve established your budget and how to make your vision match it, which is exactly what I do with you in the Jumpstart.

There’s so much more to The Jumpstart, it’s crazy magical! Check the link in my bio to read all about it 💕

I interviewed (they/them), a q***r, feminist wedding and bo***ir photographer from Finland, who was recommended to me by two separate Lovebird Listeners!

Here’s what I asked them about:

✨Sonja’s own, recent, micro wedding, how they created a safer space + shared their core values with their guests

✨ What it means to live in a “top” country for q***r folks, the tiny q***r scene in a small country like Finland… and how the bar for what counts as “good” for q***r folks is so low it’s literally on the floor 🫠

✨ Why marriers should lean into their values when planning a wedding… And, why it can be challenging to be inclusive when planning your wedding

✨ Sonja’s take + my evolving opinions on styled shoots

✨ The increasing popularity of bo***ir shoots and why Sonja loves them for being super empowering, especially for marginalized people, and for the celebration of all bodies (when we share them publicly).

It’s a great episode and I think you’ll find it gives you lots of permission to set boundaries and do your wedding *your way* - and as always, I love to hear your feedback! Let me know what hit home, what surprised you, and whether and I have inspired you to do things differently for your wedding!

***rwedding ***rowned ***anowned ***rcommunity

This one goes out to the photographer who told me that he’s shot many q***r weddings but thinks q***r folks would be better off with a q***r photographer who “knows how to shoot q***r love”.

In the next breath it asked to be on 🙄

Dude. No.

And you know who knows how to shoot q***r love?!
💕 .love 💕

Next level flowers by

Femme + Nonbinary wedding fashion by

Just in case you were looking for some ethical wedding vendors…

The rest of the folks who participated in this shoot are:

MODELS +
JEWELRY .bijoux
MAKEUP ARTIST
HAIR STYLIST
VENUE
RENTALS +
NAPKIN RINGS + PLACE CARDS .design
CAKE
RIBBON + RUNNER

Should you or shouldn’t you do a wedding favour?

The short answer: it’s a dated tradition that has lost its meaning and an added expense.

But if it’s something very meaningful to you, it will be meaningful to your guests. Just remember - you’re throwing a whole ass party, and that’s enough.

Hear more ideas for incorporating your eco-conscious values into your wedding on this week’s podcast episode, where I interview the amazing .events!

I know this episode is going to be so valuable for all of my Eco-Friendly Marriers!

I’m joined by my friend, the brilliant Romina Kwong (she/her), who is tackling event sustainability as both the founder and lead consultant at her business, .events, and as a teacher at Seneca College where she has co-created a micro-credential for Foundations of Sustainability in Event Management.

We talked about…

🌱 The most influential factors on your event’s ecological footprint, and what you can do to mitigate their impact;

🌱 Who is responsible for making an event eco-friendly - the vendors, the planners, or the marriers?

🌱 How to do your best to be eco-responsible while still staying true to your wedding vision;

🌱 The connection between eco-responsibility and feminism;

🌱 What a wedding planned with sustainability in mind might look like!

This episode is just the tip of the iceberg, so I encourage you to follow Romina on Instagram @‌ecofriendly.events and check out her website: www.ecofriendlyevents.ca. Romina doesn’t plan weddings, but if you want her eyes on your event plan (or, as a vendor, on your business!) you can book a consult with her directly.

In this episode I interview my friend , a lighting designer I’ve been working with for almost 20 years!

We talk about…

💡WTF a lighting designer even does
💡How lighting impacts your event, at every key timeline moment
💡What the lights are called, and what they do, so you’re prepared to understand a quote from a lighting company (likely handled along with your audio!)
💡Colour!

We also have some major digressions, because when Event Folk (TM pending) get together we cannot help but talk about all the things…

⚡️What wedding guests do that drive us nuts
⚡️What wedding vendors do that drive us nuts

Find the episode wherever you like to listen, and if you already have - drop your biggest takeaway below!
‌

Getting the best bang for your buck is always a win… but what’s the right way to go about haggling with wedding vendors?

You asked, I answered! I’m not joking when I tell you to slide into my DM’s 😜

Here’s what I cover in the latest episode of :

🤑 What is the wedding tax, and can it be justified? I look at arguments from both advocates and critics and give my take on it

🤑I also talk about some of the more common economic models of wedding planning, breaking down commissions and kickbacks, and explaining how the percentage-based model works, giving you, as always, my unfiltered opinion on how things are done BTS

🤑 The do’s + don’t’s of wedding vendor negotiation (haggling) including…

🤑 Templates for the first and second email you’ll send during the process

🤑 Red flags to look out for

🤑 Who you could consider negotiating with

🤑 Understanding that when you pay less, you should expect to get less…

🤑 And reasons you might be eligible for a reduced rate!
Why you shouldn’t ghost your potential wedding vendors (and what to do instead)

🤑 How not to be a red flag and operate in good faith when negotiating with a vendor!

Have an opinion? I may not enjoy negotiating my prices, but I *love* to debate, discuss, defend my values, and be enlightened by yours. Sound off in the comments or DM me - I’m so curious to know what you think!

Wherever you’re at in wedding planning…
💍 Recently engaged
💍 Recently started digging into planning
💍 Recently started freaking out that you’re missing something crucial -

These are my top tips. Want more?

I give *so* much free advice on (and I interview tons of experts so you can get theirs, too!)

Vendors + marrieds, weigh in - what is or was your wedding planning game changer?

The final episode of 2024 is about my experience as a real-life Sam-I-Am… someone who knows just how good green eggs and ham tastes, but has to jump through hoops to convince people to try them.

And in the end? Oh, I *do* like it after all, Carrie-Ann!

Listen in for the biggest game changers my clients have committed to that made them so happy they had me whispering in their ear (or going off on long tangents over Voxer and IG voicenotes) throughout the wedding planning process.

Want to get my eyes on your personal wedding plan? Check out [The Jumpstart](https://carrieannkloda.ca/jumpstart “‌”) - my virtual consultation that includes heaps of support and access to all of my resources for 90 minutes (plus my own detailed notes and suggestions based on our conversation and a personalized budget!). Find out more at the link in my bio!
‌

I'm joined by Charlie Sprinkman (he/they), founder of ***r, a global directory of q***r-owned businesses.

Creating safer spaces is a thread that runs through our entire conversation.

Charlie had some questions for me, which I was happy to answer, such as:

🏳️‍🌈 What is it like being a q***r wedding vendor?
🏳️‍🌈 What’s a q***r wedding like?

We also talked about:

🏳️‍🌈 Why it’s important to hire q***r vendors;
🏳️‍🌈 Keeping q***r vendors safe on Everywhere is Q***r;
🏳️‍🌈 And what we can do to keep q***r guests and vendors safe at weddings.

Find it wherever you like to listen, and don’t be shy to reach out to either me or Charlie with your questions and takeaways!

***rwedding ***rowned ***anowned ***rcommunity

Holidays = lots of questions and unsolicited advice about your wedding.

How to put the kibosh on conversations you don’t feel like having?

Try one of my snappy comebacks!

And keep this in mind:

The main reason people ask/give advice is because they care about you.

Especially when it comes to weddings, anyone who has planned one (and even people who haven’t - looking at you, uncle-with-an-opinion-on-absolutely-everything!) knows how stressful the task can be.

Have your own snappy comeback in mind? Share the last slide in your stories + fill in the blank. And be sure to tag me so I see your amazing answer!

🌈

Save $75 on the first step to wedding planning bliss when you book The Jumpstart before the holidays!

Inside:
1. A questionnaire you fill out ahead of time so I can start planning how to best help you before we even jump on our call.

2. 90 minutes together where I’ll listen, *really* listen to you and your partner and help you find a plan that suits both of your needs.

3. A realistic budget that fits your values and wedding vision.

4. All of my notes and insights from our call, including some strategies for how you and your partner can use the planning process to get even closer!

DM me your questions about The Jumpstart! But hurry - the sale ends Monday.

I’m joined by Jenna Wiegand, owner and executive artistic director of , a wedding invitations company. We talk about:

💍 What it’s like being a feminist wedding vendor
💍 The role of your wedding invitation in the overall event scheme
💍 Wedding traditions vs. wedding etiquette
💍 Nouveau wedding etiquette for addressing wedding invitations
💍 And some of the finer points of what makes a wedding invitation feminist
💍 Parent stress, marrier stress, and the very specific stress that comes along with hiring a day-of coordinator over a month-of event manager!

Find it wherever you like to listen!

planning stationery

Heard you loud and clear - your wedding budget is the most stressful part of the planning, and while you know how math works… It’s not going exactly the way you planned!

I’m here to solve this puzzle for you. Find the link to learn more and book in my bio!

It’s Season Two Feminists!

Let’s get into some tropes about brides and talk about the myth of the erasure of women!

👰🏻‍♂️First, what does it mean to be a bride? What is bridal? Let’s nail down what it is and whether it’s problematic…

👰🏿Whether someone should walk you down the aisle, and doing things to appease our parents and in-laws

👰🏽‍♂️Wanting to be a pretty princess on your day! Yes!
Bridal showers, bachelorettes, and how gender reveal parties are weird

👰🏾I also talk a little bit about my views on the stupidity of some of the governing bodies in Canada, going harder than ever for trans rights, and the bigger goals of

Find it wherever you like to listen 🎙️

Text from the images above:

I’ve abstained this long from posting anything about the war between Israel and Hamas-ruled Palestine up until now, for so many reasons, but the main one is this:

While I do speak up on a lot of human rights issues, it’s always my goal to be as effective as possible and to use the talents I have (rather than those I wish I had).

I have long believed that my purpose on this planet is to make a contribution. And if I can’t add perspective or scope to a conversation, then I’m just adding noise and that’s supremely unhelpful.

I am not going to change hearts and minds with an Instagram post. But I can do that in a conversation. I have done that. I am doing that.

I am also keeping myself informed about what our elected leaders here in Canada are doing, and I know who to speak to when I disagree with the way they are voting, or the way they are speaking about the war. Again, when I feel like I am in a position to edify someone, I am doing it.

Last week, my trusted friend and former expert in international conflict mediation, , encouraged me to share this with my followers here, because she felt it would add something to the conversation, and so I have. If you are interested in a deeper discussion, then as always, I am available via DM.

As I’m devoted to wedding season right now, I’ve decided to end the first season of with something top of mind:

The ✨Perfect✨ (Classic) Wedding Day Timeline.

This episode is basically a wedding day timeline template… with just a few sidebars 😜

You know me - there are no holds barred as I tell you what I love and hate to see on a timeline, what I’ve learned from my past experiences, and where I see lots of room to f**k with tradition.

I talk about:

⏰ The four pages of the perfect schedule: the rehearsal, the set-up, the cocktail + ceremony, and the reception

⏰ The time allotment for everything, from hair and makeup, to your photos, to how long it takes to serve the salad course

⏰ I also talk about cool (and not cool) surprise elements and where they might fit in on your wedding day.

I’ll be back in your earbuds in November, with Season 2 of The Feminist Wedding Podcast!! I’m so excited - thank you all so much for listening and for all of your feedback.

(she/her), founder of , joins me to talk about how le***an weddings are different and special, but also kind of the same as straight weddings.

This is something the wedding industry has to learn to hold in balance, both that q***r weddings are special and unique, and, also, that q***r weddings are, first and foremost, weddings!

And they can and often will have all of the trappings of hetero weddings.

Here’s what we chatted about:

🏳️‍🌈We talked briefly about Ty’s own wedding that she’s planning with her fiancée, and I offered some advice about getting their seemingly very different visions to line up together;

🏳️‍🌈How the proposal happens, and how couples decide who will propose;

🏳️‍🌈Lesbian wedding outfits (surprise surprise - both Ty and I think you’ll be best off going custom!);

🏳️‍🌈Every aspect of the day itself, from how you’ll walk down the aisle to a rousing and surprising game of Keep or Toss with reception traditions;

🏳️‍🌈And the many things that don’t change, no matter who is getting married, including the challenge of scheduling your honeymoon and the importance of a day of coordinator;

🏳️‍🌈Gratitude journals (I like the 5 Minute Journal);

🏳️‍🌈How to find gay friendly vendors, and how to share that you’re a gay friendly vendor!

Up now wherever you like to listen!

Here’s a neat trick -

You can simplify your wedding planning while at the same time making your guests more comfortable.

And more comfortable guests means a better party, the kind of memorable event people will talk about for years to come.

Do everyone a favour and share this post! And this is by no means an exhaustive list - if you have suggestions, drop them in the comments!

***rwedding ***rweddings

The conversation I had with Hillary O’Dell, lead designer and founder of Hilandel, which specializes in custom bridal wear, feels *hyper-relevant* right now, even though we chatted over a month ago.

We talked about:

⚡️How we are forever figuring out the “vibe check” part of working with a new client
⚡️The challenge of this industry where marriers are expected to have a _vision_ and just _know_ what they want and know how the industry works, when in reality you are doing this for the first time!
⚡️Body neutrality and how Hillary helps brides navigate the complexity of custom wedding dress design, and her magical process
⚡️The wide range of possibilities for wedding outfits, and why Hillary uses the word “bride” (it’s an aesthetic, not a gender!)

Hillary is completely brilliant and her work is stunning. She leads her business with her heart and her values, and it’s beautiful to witness.

Something I help my clients with over and over is boundary-setting (and maintaining, arguably more challenging).

Boundaries are going to come up - dealing with toxic family or family drama while planning is a big one, and in the episode, I even respond to a listener question about managing divorced parents who can’t stand each other.

It’s a huge topic, but boundaries are a very important part of my life and the way I support my clients, from figuring out what the wedding of your dreams even looks like, to deciding on the perfect guest list (and how to manage input about it) and determining how involved your parents will even be in the wedding planning.

But always, always - I want you to be planning to be married! So figuring out how to defend your new family and be a team are integral to my work (and boundaries are a major part of being a solid team).

This isn’t my first episode on boundaries, and it won’t be my last - and I know there are haters out there but they’re not my people 😜 YOU are!