Rockabye Reflux

Hey 👋

I thought it was about time I re-introduced myself. It’s been a while and so many followers come and go as they move in and out of the baby stages. Although I do have some OG followers - thanks guys!

I’m Faye; I’m a Registered Nurse and have been since 2014. I’ve worked in a number of roles within the NHS including A&E, ITU, Haematology, Oncology and acute medical assessment.

When my daughter came along; my entire world was rocked to places I didn’t know existed. We battled through severe colic, tongue tie, allergies, reflux, terrible sleep, feeding challenges and more; all whilst in lockdown. I came out of it, completely and utterly broken - but also with a drive and passion deeper than I’d ever felt before.

I ploughed every ounce of time, energy and money into training and setting up what was “Rockabye Reflux”, which then evolved into Rockabye Hub; because all of this goes way beyond reflux.

And now Mali is 4 - I can’t quite believe how much things have changed, grown and evolved. I’ve got my own premises, I’ve helped hundreds and hundreds of families and I’ve sort of got a work-life balance back (although I’m forever working on this because self-employed life is hard!)

I’ve recently found myself back into fitness and the gym which is where you will find me when I’m not at clinic or parenting; and it’s been the best thing I’ve done for my mental health and overall happiness.

I’m a chocolate lover, sing your heart out in the car, and ride or die friendship type of gal and I am ALWAYS up for a good old cuppa and a chat.

And that’s about all I can think of for now; drop me a 👋 in the comments whether you’re new to my page, an OG follower or just dropping by for this season! 👇

❓What can we learn from this ❓

🤯 SO much. It’s not necessarily something we can fix over instagram but my hope is that this gives you hope. If you are in the thick of tongue tie, feeding challenges, scar tissue, oral functional challenges; whatever it may be; there is hope.

🙌 Find your tribe of support. Find someone who gets it.

❌ Scar tissue is not the enemy; we just need to be looking deeper.

🔈 Massive shoutout to Baby J and his parents who were the most wonderful advocates for their little one. Thank you for trusting the process. Thank you for trusting me to support you!

Hey families,

just dropping this on the grid to say you got this!!

💛We see you

💛It’s not all in your head

💛It’s bloody hard at times

💛You are not alone on this journey

💛You know your baby best, keep advocating for your little one.

Sending all the love,
Faye & Carmelle 💛

Scar tissue remodelling

💥💥This post speaks for itself…

Take a good look at how this baby presented to clinic and swipe across to see how they progressed before they left clinic. 👀👀

Remodelling scar tissue occurs through adequate tongue movement and optimising function. Movement and tongue space helps the scar tissue to become more supple. If the tongue isn’t moving wel, the muscular structures contract and tighten and the scar tissue becomes a more sturdy/tight structure, further impacting the mobility.

‼️A reminder scar tissue can take up to 18 months to 2 years to heal, so the potential for it to tighten, and oral function deteriorate can occur many months after a tongue tie division.

Breastfeeding or bottle feeding alone is not the answer IF the latch is consistently shallow. As the muscles are not moving and engaging optimally therefore optimal mobility is limited. 🤱🏽🍼

😵‍💫 The consistent symptoms that show up at any point in time, maybe an indicator to seek further support and assessment.

The symptoms are your baby’s way of communicating that something may be a little off. 👶🏼

The inner feeling voice within, is your instinct telling you you’re right 💛

It’s ok to seek support and also ok to seek a second or third opinion if you need.

Advice to ignore for an unsettled baby…

Scroll along the slides to see some classics I’ve heard myself and that others are frequently told!

I used to feel like I was losing my mind when I would raise concerns about Mali. And I frequently see parents who feel relieved in clinic that they are “not going mad”. With different views, opinions and ideas, parenting an unsettled baby can feel more than overwhelming.

What’s the worst advice you’ve been given for an unsettled baby? 👇

Where to begin with reflux…

There are many contributing factors to reflux but the most helpful place to start if your baby is struggling, is with a feeding and tongue tie assessment.

Swipe to read more ➡️➡️➡️

Tongue Function and Weaning

⁉️Did you know how the tongue moves and functions is a key element in how babies transition to solid food?

We see many babies who have had a tongue tie divided previously, or were told that their tongue tie was only mild and won’t cause a problem, as well as babies with no tongue tie but tension or low tone, begin to show symptoms when it comes to their weaning to solid food journey.

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It can sometimes be difficult for parents to know if a baby is having challenges with solids at first because it’s something new right?

We also hear:

“solids are for fun until age 1”

“Stay on mushy/purée foods, they’ll get there”

“As long as they’re still drinking milk and gaining weight they will be fine”

So at what point does it become a concern? When should you reach out for further support?

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and have worked to pull together a webinar to cover this topic in more detail.

We look at what is expected at different ages in terms of physiology and developmental milestones, we go further into what signs and symptoms might prompt you to seek further support and what you can do in the interim if you have concerns.

How did a tongue tie or oral dysfunction impact your baby starting solids? Share in the comments below 👇

Tongue Tie Signs & Symptoms

It can feel so confusing when you’ve been told your baby has got a tongue tie, then they haven’t, then they might do, then they do but it doesn’t need cutting.

So I thought I’d make a list so you can see some of the main signs and symptoms of tongue tie. The list is not exhaustive and there can be others too. Your baby also doesn’t need to have every symptom to warrant an assessment.

What signs and symptoms does/did your baby have?

It’s okay not to be okay.

Inspired me to remind you that this is definitely true. I felt this so much yesterday. Crying, tantrums, sensory overload (for both of us). I felt like it was my way of parenting which was causing her behaviour.

Perhaps I shouldn’t send her to nursery.

Maybe I go on my phone too much.

I haven’t played with her enough.

I don’t have good enough boundaries in place.

Or one of the other many pieces of mum guilt that seemed to enter my head.

But the truth is; it could have been any one of those things. Or it could have just been a bad day. I didn’t need to beat myself up. Yet I did. I didn’t need to feel stupid for crying in Asda. But I did.

Parenting is hard. We are so far from unsettled baby days. But each stage brings about new challenges, trials and tests. Our children push us to our greatest limits. But they also teach us our greatest lessons.

So in amongst it all, if you’re not feeling okay or 100% every single day; it’s okay. Keep going, you got this.

Tag someone who needs to see this today ❤️

Feeding Aversion

👨‍🍼🤱 Whether it’s breast or bottle, aversion can be incredibly stressful. Screaming at the sight of breast or bottle - there’s usually a reason for it.

🤷‍♀️ If it’s a new behaviour that’s come on all of a sudden; look at what’s changed. For example is baby unwell, had their vaccinations, or have you changed perfume or deodorant? Are they teething?

⏰ If it’s been building gradually over a period of time; we need to look deeper and get to the underlying cause? We need to always think about pressure and whether there is an association there too.

💫 And remember - it’s not your fault!

3 things to look out for when feeding your baby…

1. Dribbling milk - breast or bottle! If a baby is not maintaining a complete seal around the ni**le or teat; there will be a reason why. With bottle feeding it can be more visible like the photo in the slides. With breastfeeding it can show up that baby has a wet mouth, under your breasts feel wet after feeding or that you’re having to use a muslin to catch the milk during feeds.
2. Pinched lips. When breastfeeding; this can be positioning and attachment related. When bottle feeding, it could be the bottle type or teat shape or the position you’re feeding in. But if you’ve altered all of this and feel like no matter what; your baby can not get a wide, deep latch - it’s a flag that something else might be going on.
3. Tires easily. Is your baby feeding a little then falling straight to sleep with every feed? Are you having to constantly keep them awake with every feed? If you’re breastfeeding, does it feel like they’re not really swallowing?

Swipe the slides to see what to do and let me know if this was helpful in the comments!

Shallow latch in the older baby

When we look at tongue function from a holistic and functional perspective; amazing things can happen!

If you’re struggling with this or any symptoms are showing up for you like the ones listed on the post; start with the latching the older baby webinar on my website. Click on the link in bio, visit website, then tap on resources! Myself and have had some awesome feedback and it can help you think more about what’s going on for your little one.

Why won’t my baby stop crying?!

✍️ New blog post! Click the link: https://www.rockabyehub.co.uk/blog to have a read and give you a starting point.

It can feel absolutely relentless when they just.won’t.stop.

I hear you I really do.

Clicking 🫰

Does your baby clicking during feeds? 👇

💫 Swipe through to read what it is and what you can do about it!

Dear mama.

You are my safe place
You are my home
You are the only face
I really know

You carried and birthed me
You fed me, you chose
To respond, to get up
When I was alone

I know I keep crying
You feel I’m opposed
To your methods of soothing
But I promise, you know

You’re swaying, your soothing
I feel safe at last
In this new scary place
That’s all moving so fast

One day it won’t feel
So numb and so raw
We’ll chat and we’ll laugh
And we’ll play evermore

But for now just keep going
Through your burning red eyes
You’ve got this mama
Im right by your side

The wonderful Carmelle and I are back for our monthly webinar.

This month it’s all about reflux! Yep tongue ties’ pesky little cousin 🤮

Come and join us in our reflux 101 webinar to get some clarity around this common infant condition.

Approx 80% of families that come to clinic have experienced reflux symptoms in their baby either from birth, or a few months into feeding.

⚡️Families have stopped breastfeeding and transitioned to formula after seeking medical advice to help solve their baby’s reflux

⚡️They have gone down the medication route from the advice of their doctor

⚡️They have felt fobbed off by their HV, GP and paediatrician in more ways than one

Despite all of the above, the symptoms continued to persist.

The trauma is real! 😓

And the underlying reason for this condition rarely assessed from the get go. The band aid approaches commonly leave families way out of their depth as they desperately figure out how to help and resolve their baby’s discomfort.

Is reflux impacting you and your baby’s life?

Are you a lactation supporter, hcp or birth keeper wanting to find out how to support your clients in this area of infant feeding?

Come and join us on 21st June at 8pm BST

🌟 Link to book a ticket: https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/reflux-101-causes-and-solutions-tickets-347810098367?aff=ebdssbdestsearch 🌟

Ellie & Maisie

2 years of no sleep and a very uncomfortable toddler who was still waking hourly - this pair are finally getting some well earned rest!

To say I’m happy for them would be an understatement!

Positioning & attachment is everything . . .

Except when it’s not.

I feel like it’s drummed into breastfeeding mother’s that all will be well if P&A is on point.

Yes P&A is important. But you can try all the techniques, tips and tricks in the world, and if there is something underlying going on with baby’s oral function; resolving P&A won’t fully resolve the problem.

Accepting a shallow latch seems to be very often normalised.

“They’re lazy”

“That’s just how they feed”

“They’re gaining weight so it’s not an issue”

When altering P&A isn’t cutting it and you are still experiencing what you perceive to be something not right with your little one; access support, get a second opinion and trust that instinct of yours.

You got this.

👅 Tongue Tie must haves

If your baby has had a tongue tie division, you your think baby has a tie and you’re waiting an assessment, or you’re awaiting a division, here are my must haves!

1. An O-ball. This can really help babies to start extending/protruding their tongue.

2. Support. Navigating tongue tie and oral function and be draining and it’s hard to keep going; especially if changes are slow. Rallying up support with family, friends and feeding too can help you to feel less alone.

3. Long teether toys. These can help baby to keep moving their tongue around in their mouth. They can help babies to start opening their mouth wider and chewing down. They’re also really good for sensory input if your baby has been particularly guarded orally.

4. Oral Play. I can’t stress this enough. Nothing changes if nothing changes. .feeding.specialist has a wonderful oral play guide which includes exercises to do pre and post TT division. You need to be persistent. It’s with repetition that we see change. We need frequent, effective exercises to help re-educate the muscles and relieve any residual tension too!

5. Time, patience & persistence. It’s more than a division. It’s extremely rare for a baby to have a division and all the presenting symptoms disappear immediately. A baby will have begun to compensate in utero for their restriction. They will then have continued to compensate after being born. We have to remember this when thinking about getting the procedure done. It can take a number of weeks and in some cases months and months of helping baby to navigate their new found movement. Neuro-muscular re-education - we are changing those patterns.

When you’ve had the night from hell and you can barely string a sentence together let alone fathom looking after a tiny human, you still manage it.

Game face on; repeat after me: “I am good enough”

And today, good enough, is enough.

You can handle the cries. You can handle the sick. You can handle the notorious activities of early motherhood. The washing that you’ve washed and re washed six times and is going damp again in the machine; forget it. The sensory tray you didn’t set up; don’t sweat it. The baby group you couldn’t face because all the other babies seem happy and the mum’s seem so well put together; don’t even give it a second thought.

One day, it won’t feel so bleak and endless. I promise.

We are painted a picture of motherhood where the narrative is coffee dates, play dates and picnics. Yet the reality can be far from it.

When you’ve got an unsettled baby, even taking a shower feels impossible. And even if you manage the shower, you still hear the cries; even when they’re not there.

So I’m here to remind you today, that simply getting up and carrying on, is enough. Take the pressure off. You are the perfect parent for your baby. Just the way you are.

👇Tag a mama who needs to hear this today 👇

Tongue Tie and Reflux 👅

🤝 They’re connected. They cause air swallowing. Air causes reflux.

🙅‍♀️ They are also never the first port of call when it comes to thinking about reflux. But they really should be.

😛 If you’re thinking reflux, think tongue tie. Think tongue function. It’s not a simple fix by any means. It can take a lot of time, patience and persistence to improve function. For some it can be weeks; for others it can be much longer.

☺️ But improving tongue function sets us up for having good oral habits for life too; so the longer term benefit is great!

The most talked about topic… baby sleep.

“Are they sleeping through yet?”

They’re not still in your bed are they?

“If you carry on holding them, they’ll get used to it”

“Are they still feeding overnight?”

“It’ll be better when they’re on solids”

A baby with reflux; unfortunately is not going to sleep too well as a general rule. They’re going to find it difficult to lay on their back. Any trapped wind becomes more uncomfortable when lay flat. Any pressure in the stomach from excess air is going to make those stomach contents more likely to come into the oesophagus and cause them to startle and wake up.

Added to this, if there’s tongue tie too (which is a common factor with reflux) - the tongue is less likely to be suctioned into the upper palate and this makes it more likely that a baby will wake up when you lay them flat.

If you’re living through it, or have done in the past - you’ll know that the sleep deprivation with a baby with reflux is next level.

The answer you’ll often hear is to leave them to cry, to sleep train, to just stop holding them so much. But responding to our babies needs is a biological instinct. Doing anything less feels wrong.

So how do you get more sleep?

Investigate what’s causing it! I know I say this a lot, but it really is the most solid answer. It’s unlikely to be an overnight fix. And you know what? It’s unfair. Why do we as reflux parents have to go through months of playing detective, with little support. When non-reflux parents don’t.

I have a ton of free resources on my grid, I have a handbook (link in bio), I and other reflux specialists offer 1:1 support. There are options!

One day, they will sleep. You won’t wake up feeling like you need matchsticks to keep your eyes open. But until then, coffee!

It’s a classic isn’t it. You raise concerns about your unsettled baby, the amount they vomit or how difficult feeding is seeming. Only to be told that it’s fine because they’re gaining weight. 🙄

🙅‍♀️This mindset and narrative needs to shift. Weight gain is NOT the only indicator that feeding is going well.

- Just because a baby is gaining weight does not mean that they are thriving.

- Just because a baby is gaining weight does not mean that they are feeding well.

- Just because a baby is gaining weight does not mean that they are not uncomfortable.

- Just because a baby is gaining weight does not mean that their screaming and poor sleep isn’t affecting your mental health.

Let’s 👏 stop 👏 normalising 👏 the abnormal 👏

❌ It’s not normal for babies to cry more than they are happy.

❌ It’s not normal for babies to vomit up the entire feed.

❌ It’s not normal for babies to scream during or after every feed.

If you think something isn’t right, it isn’t. Trust your gut and seek skilled feeding support. Something is causing those symptoms.

💫 You got this. I hear you.

Charmaine & Kai

🥰 Lovely review from a lovely mama! There were no quick fixes but there never are and this family worked through everything I suggested to see results.

💫 It fills my soul reading reviews like this it really does! Swipe to see what Charmaine has to say about working with me ➡️

Tongue Function & Solids

Join and I for this months webinar exploring the challenges that can occur when transitioning to solid foods.

How has weaning been for you so far? 🥭

What questions do you ask yourself about weaning your baby to solids? 🍎

Navigating solids can sometimes feel like a minefield, especially where tongue tie or oral dysfunction has been or is currently a factor. For many families it can feel somewhat overwhelming.

Whether you are baby led weaning, purées or a combination of the two, this webinar is for you if:

🥭You want to understand the weaning journey before your baby is 6 months

🥭 You are about to start weaning your baby onto solid foods

🥭You are currently weaning your baby onto solid foods and finding it challenging

🥭Your baby has established weaning but presents with symptoms such as ‘fussy’ feeding or unable to transition to lumpier textured foods

In this webinar, you will learn:

🍎Signs and symptoms of oral dysfunction

🍎What to expect when weaning your baby

🍎Strategies to support your baby as they wean

🍎Navigating the right skilled support

It includes:

🌟45 minutes webinar
🌟15 minute Q&A session
🌟Webinar workbook

Link to book tickets: https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/tongue-function-and-solids-tickets-327857479547

Tension. . .

Working at the Tongue Tie Centre and working 1:1 with clients - it’s something I see such a lot of. It’s made me go back and look at pictures of Mali when she was younger. I can see so clearly now how much tension she had and how this must have affected her reflux and how unsettled she was.

Swipe along to see and read more!

Then tag someone who might find this helpful 👇

Congestion

It can happen for a number of reasons! Swipe along to read about the reasons ➡️

This is a question I’m often asked.

And it makes me want to cry. Because I remember feeling this way.

In short, no. Evidence tells us that responding to our baby’s needs and emotions, forms the basis of a secure attachment. We know that crying in the arms of a caregiver is different to crying alone.

There’s no denying that prolonged periods of crying must be stressful, but we help that through co-regulating with our babies.

Also just to say, if the crying gets too much at any point, it is okay to place your baby somewhere safe and take a breather for a few minutes. I still do it now when toddler life gets overwhelming.

Have you ever worried that the crying will harm your baby?

One of my most frequently asked questions in my DM’s is how to support with feeding your older baby. reel the other day highlighted how many people were asking for this.

And so we’ve joined forces, to bring to you the first in our series of webinars;

‘Latching the older baby’

We are so excited to share with you tips, techniques and strategies to optimise a wide and deep latch during breastfeeding and optimise bottle feeding techniques.

Sign up for the webinar via the eventbrite link in bio.

https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/latching-the-older-baby-tickets-320982726977?keep_tld=1

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Ps. We have collaborated to bring to you our brand new private membership community, register your interest via the eventbrite link in bio.