Feel Free

It's Men's Health Week and we thought it was a perfect opportunity to re-share our R.A.I.S.E. campaign which helps people to spot the signs of depression in men.

Our survey found that 50% of therapists reported men present with different depression symptoms than women and that 56% of therapists agreed that men are less likely to get mental health support than women.

What does R.A.I.S.E. stand for? 🤔

Risk-taking
Anger
Isolation
Substance Abuse
Exhaustion

The campaign aims to raise awareness of these lesser known symptoms of depression in men and to encourage men to seek therapy if they are struggling with their mental health.

Read more here 👉 https://orlo.uk/WRMxy

There is always someone to speak to if you are in crisis.

This is how starting to heal feels.

In most of the everyday conversations we have about Christmas people express the more comfortable emotions; feelings like excitement, happiness, and relief if they’re having some time out of their normal routine. Sometimes people might share feeling stressed or anxious about the seasonal expectations. However, there are so many emotions that go unexpressed. This time of year can be extremely difficult for any number of reasons. Wishing all my clients both past and present and my friends & family a peaceful and restful Christmas.

It’s World Mental Health Day. Today I was reminded that seven years ago I shared a post about ending stigma around talking about mental health issues. I think it’s remarkable the progress we’ve made in this area. It’s much less taboo than it was. We definitely still have a long way to go in the treatment of mental health issues, but I’m celebrating this as a win today.

This is useful advice. Also, being outside combined with mindfulness is even better. You can tune in to what you can see, hear, touch, smell around you and be truly present in the moment.

I‘ve been signing up for some really interesting seminars this Mental Health Awareness Week and this evening I’m looking forward to settling down to this documentary about addiction.

Busted's Matt Willis: I’m nervous about my kids seeing my drug and alcohol past

Busted's Matt Willis: I’m nervous about my kids seeing my drug and alcohol past Matt says the impact on loved ones is a "forgotten piece of the puzzle" when it comes to addiction.

It's Neurodiversity Celebration week 🧠

This week raises awareness and challenges misconceptions and stereotypes about people with neurological differences to help the world understand, value and celebrate the talents of neurodiverse minds.

As part of this campaign, we would like to share a powerful story from our member, Laura Bradshaw about how she was diagnosed with ADHD herself as a child and works with those diagnosed in their adulthood. Laura discusses some key topics when it comes to a late diagnoses and conflicting emotions that people can experience.

Read more here 👉 https://orlo.uk/Z9j5R

I know

Merry Christmas! Hope everyone gets a chance to recharge their batteries over the festive season.

Some great reminders this December.
Fantastic illustration by

There are some real gems in this article.

People Are Sharing The Most Impactful Lesson They've Ever Learned In Therapy "My therapist told me this ten years ago, and I still think about it all the time."

Since the news of the death of HM the Queen, I’ve heard or seen a few comments implying that the only people ‘allowed’ to be sad are close relatives of the Queen. Earlier, I overheard someone say that this is like Diana all over again and people are getting carried away. This frustrates me a lot. As humans we seem to find it very easy to judge or criticise other peoples feelings, to deny them, to brush over them, to minimise them and sometimes to even silence them. Feelings aren’t ‘right’ or ‘wrong,’ they just are! It’s ok for me to feel one thing and someone else to feel something else. It’s worth bearing in mind, most of us have lost loved ones and this death will also be tapping into peoples past losses and grief. Empathy is about getting into someone else’s shoes and seeing the world through their eyes. How lovely would our world be if there was more empathy around! RIP Her Majesty the Queen

‘Whether it's criticism calmly dispensed by a teacher at school, or a cruel comment hurled in the heat of an argument with a friend or lover, we tend to remember criticism far better than positive comments, due to a phenomenon called the negativity bias.’

Why criticism lasts longer than praise Most of us are subjected to insults, sarcastic comments or bad feedback in our everyday lives. But we weren't built to deal with torrents of criticism.

It’s International Women’s Day. There are so many things I could talk about from a therapy point of view. Today, I’d like to highlight the victim-blaming that sometimes goes on with regards to domestic violence. ‘Why doesn’t she just leave?’ Here are some of the reasons. Thank you to the many women who work in this arena, championing the cause.

Happy Christmas and hope everyone has a peaceful start to 2022.

World Mental Health Day 2021. I spent time with my family and saw this beautiful statue of Princess Diana for the first time. Her interest in people and empathy shone through her interactions. She listened well and spent her most valuable resource, her time, generously. Perhaps we can all learn something from her in how to come alongside those who are suffering.

First in-person counselling sessions in 18 months!

It’s World Su***de Prevention Day. Su***de often isn’t about wanting to die, it’s that you can’t find a way of living. Hoping that all those people feeling hopeless today can find a way through.

Journalling can be very beneficial for mental health. Here is a helpful article on how to do it well! https://www.thehowtosocialworker.com/journal-prompts-mental-health/?fbclid=IwAR2fzVMFzRjDtWqJHmWK9R08Ygvl4eEN1zwdZXYgt4yX1rY2D1tNbKKhgUs

50 Amazing Journal Prompts for Mental Health from Therapists Benefits of Mental Health Journaling Journaling is a severely underrated activity. The benefits of routinely

Useful to know for those with school age children.

Be Mindful of After School Restraint Collapse This Week!

With children going back to school, emotions are going to be running high this week (in fact for the rest of this month) and it's likely their behaviour is going to be really tricky at home for a while.

The presumption here is that the parents must have done something wrong to cause the poor behaviour, because school aren’t having the same issue. In a sense they’re correct, the behaviour is because of something they’ve done, but not in the negative way they expect.

This happens because parents have done everything right! When you make your child feel loved, safe, supported and respect with you, they feel comfortable enough to be their authentic selves with you, or in other words, they don’t have to pretend or ‘be good’ anymore.

They have spent all day, at school, holding in frustration, fear, anxiety, anger and other uncomfortable emotions, because they know that it is “naughty” to let them out at school. When they get home to you however things are entirely different. There’s a massive release.

Imagine your child at school and everything they have to deal with as being a bottle of fizzy drink. They have spent all day being shaken, building pressure, but have ‘been good’ and managed to keep their lid screwed on tightly. When they see you, the need to release is huge, pop, off comes the lid and the ensuing spray of all that has been bottled up inside. The technical term for this is restraint collapse, but I much prefer to think of that bottle finally releasing its pressure.

This is all a wonderful compliment of your parenting skills. If you hadn’t made your child feel secure enough to be authentic with you, when they were feeling happy and otherwise, then they would continue to bottle up the feelings and the release (and subsequent mess) would likely happen at school. Causing far more problems.

Many children sadly get into the cycle of not being able to release to their parents, perhaps because their parents have raised them to not share how they feel with them through constant punishments and exclusions, or perhaps because the parents have been too busy, or absent, to listen. The result then is constant difficulty and poor behaviour at school, as they struggle to keep a lid on things and erratically explode, without the safe release of home.

What can you do about restraint collapse? Really, the best thing is to understand and accept it for what it is, a great testament to the hard work you have put into raising a child with good emotional intelligence and a strong bond with them.

The effects wear off as children settle into school and things become easier for them, however you will see it time and again throughout the school years. When it happens again (after initially ceasing) you will know that they are struggling with something at school.

Don’t take any explosions personally, they are definitely not acting this way because they hate you, it’s actually a bizarre way of them saying that they love you, lots. Instead, let your child know that it’s OK, you’re here for them and you’re big enough and mature enough to hold their difficult feelings as well as their happy ones.