Da;rci

I'm not sure how to write this post. It's been a whirlwind, but extremely exciting.

So this page is going to close by the end of Easter, the business has been shut down already. "But it's only just started!" you may be thinking, and you're right. However, it's being taken over by something amazing.

For those interested. County Counselling C.I.C is opening its doors at the end of July. A low-cost, online service dedicated to Shropshire and the surrounding counties. We're soft launching now until then before the hard launch in July, so expect to see some changes to social media, website etc. The link is below and you're very welcome to follow our progress.

https://www.facebook.com/CountyCounselling/

County Counselling Mental health service

Absolutely love this. All work with Da;rci; training courses, resources, and counselling services are completely neurodivergence integrated. Everything is a work in progress and is run by you. If it doesn’t make sense, it doesn’t work for you! 💗

Presentation and workbooks ready to go for our next workshop!

It’s invaluable to have a tailored approach to a company and their staff when it comes to delivering appropriate content that would benefit employee mental health. Looking at their workload, their stress levels, vicarious trauma, how they manage their home situation and what employers can do to support them.

We now offer a unique wellbeing package for companies who are looking for employee support and counselling. Get in touch to find out more.

[email protected]

Da;rci (Domestic Abuse; Recovery Counselling Intervention) was created by our founder, Lucy, after one of those stupid mental health walks, moaning about the frustrations of her role as a support worker, never feeling enough for clients, and consistently on the verge of burnout.

The idea of Da;rci is to offer therapeutic support for those who have, who are, and who are supporting those experiencing domestic abuse. A trauma-informed, inclusive, and person-centred approach to all clients, the need for accessibility is vital for the service to do it's job.

The name itself is to symbolise the journey through our processing of experiences. The semi-colon is placed carefully to represent the end of abuse and the beginning of recovery; the opportunity to separate the domestic abuse, pause, and leave it behind.

So, here's the plan.
- Da;rci will accept referrals from both professionals and individuals.
- Counselling will be single-session, limited sessions, or unlimited. Depending on request and need.
- Private sessions, training, presentations and resources will help finance free counselling for those unable to pay.

How are we going to do this?
- Online private sessions will be available immediately and will be single-session or limited depending on request and need.
- Training and presentations will be designed and offered next, to inform other services of domestic abuse, trauma, and vicarious trauma among others.
- Resources will start to be designed and available for domestic abuse services and individuals to purchase.
- The service will expand to in-person, children and young people, and for counselling placement students to study under the service.

“Face to face or online sessions? Which is better?”

With this technological age, we have been able to move away from having to visit the “doctor’s office” and have many services at a click of a button. This includes therapy, and that’s fantastic. But what is “better” comes down to how the client feels about it. Ask yourself these questions and see what you think would be better for you.

“Is my home a safe space?” - do you have distractions at home, family or pets that need attention when you’re there? Are the issues connected to them or that environment?

“How computer savvy am I?” - Most online therapy requires at the minimum a smart phone with good signal. A laptop or computer and ease with navigating programs like zoom or teams, alongside good broadband connection helps to ease the distraction of it being an online session.

“How do I feel talking about personal issues over the phone?” - Though online you can see someone, therapy involves silence. Some people find this really comfortable over the phone, others actually talk more, whilst others find it really intimidating.

“How do I feel talking about personal issues in a different room with one other person?” - Is the thought of this intimidating? If being at home is your safe space, or you have mobility issues, social anxiety, neurodiversity, or anything else. The idea of travelling and seeing someone in their comfortable environment may seem overwhelming.

There are positives and negatives to both. Online therapy may be cheaper, may work with your schedule, be easier to access and feel more comfortable with. Face to face may feel more personal, offers a safe space, and may offer more options for the types of therapy.

Although many charities and agencies have gone to online therapy to keep costs down, remember, this is not your only option. Many therapists have gone back to face to face since covid. It’s finding the right therapist for you. 💕

“How many sessions do I need?”

Well, this depends entirely on each individual person. The best thing to do is ask yourself these questions;

How long does it normally take me to feel comfortable in a new relationship?

How easy is it for me to trust a professional?

How does it make me feel to talk about my issues?

Some agencies provide a set amount of sessions, usually around 6-8. Other agencies and private practitioners may offer unlimited. This may influence who you wish to work with.

You also may decide to go to an agency providing a set amount and uncover more things you would like to discuss. This is entirely normal and is why some agencies offer unlimited, to give you the choice.

From experience, no one issue takes an average amount of sessions as we all respond to issues differently, and we may discover one issue is intertwined with another or multiple.

TLDR; a counsellor cannot answer this for a client. It is a journey that only hindsight knows the answer to how long it takes 💕

"Can a counsellor prescribe medication?"

Only a professional who is qualified in medical prescribing can prescribe medication. In the U.K, mental health medication is usually prescribed by a GP, a Psychiatrist, or a Mental Health Nurse Prescriber. Counsellors, psychologists, psychotherapists and other talking therapy professionals are not trained to prescribe any medications, nor professionally refer/suggest mental health medication to clients.

I would like to do a little Q&A/FAQ thing over this bank holiday weekend. So need your help!

If you could ask a therapist one thing about counselling, what would it be?

Rules:

Disclosing personal experiences are your responsibility when asking. DMing me is fine, but ask yourself, why it’s important for you to tell me.

Questions may be adjusted but will be posted publicly. Please consider this when asking.

No AITA, please!

This is not a free therapy session. This is designed to help people understand what therapy is and how it works for those who are unsure.

FAQ section will be posted in one post at some point after gathering all the questions submitted, and will be up only on this page until further notice. This will not include names or personal information of the asker, but consider this when asking if you do not wish it to be made public. I have the right to take the page and the FAQ down when/if I choose. I will not post the section anywhere else.

This page is fantastic in explaining boundaries and how they benefit us. Please check it out 💕

Our ability to set and keep healthy boundaries can be impacted by where we perceive power to be. Because if all power is on the outside of us, then:

💧We must look to everyone/everything else to guide our steps.

💧We are perpetually a victim of forces bigger than us.

💧We don’t have any options or choices (beyond what they give us).

When we perceive all power located outside of us, our emotional well-being and boundaries will reflect that.

(Er, what boundaries)? 👀

As we discover our internal power, everything begins to change.

It’s not that there aren’t still powerful things( like systems and people) out there.

There are.

But we have power too.

Sure, we may still have to work *within* the systems, situation, or people in front of us…

But we have power too.

And we can use it.

That discovery changes everything.

❤️

Molly

PS. Wanna work with me?

In my 8-week online intensive for women, we go deep into all things boundaries, including how to find and work with our internal power source. ✨

If you’d like to know more, come watch my free intro class and see if you might be a fit.
Http://boundaried.com 🦋

PPS.

There are horrible injustices done in this world by people/groups who abuse their power in terrible ways. The trauma from this (often generational in scope), can cause a generalized trauma response of perceived powerlessness in those who were victims.

Such a response makes total and complete sense (and can actually help with survival). Know that this post is NOT shaming such survival responses. On the contrary, such responses are to be treated with honor. (In times of survival, they kept you safe enough to get to this place, despite the challenges).

But after the trauma is over, it’s important to eventually help the brain shift back into a more expansive view of power, one that includes personal power (agency, choice). Because remaining in “survival mode,” once finally safe, does not support a thriving life.

What is the difference between talking to a therapist and talking to your friends/family? Investment.

A good therapist is invested in you, they want to understand your reasons for actions taken, they empathise with how situations made you feel and are interested in what you wish to say or do. A therapist is unopinionated, non-judgemental and questions/challenges only when you are ready to ask the questions yourself.

A friend or family member may have an investment in your issues as well as you. They have a right to take sides on arguments, have opinions on yours and others actions, and they may have different boundaries and tolerance levels to you and not be able to understand how you feel or why you have made decisions they wouldn't have. They may be involved with who or what your issues are, and have investment in agreeing or disagreeing with you to encourage how they feel too.

"How do I find a therapist?"

There are a few directories that list counsellors/psychotherapists/psychologists located in your area. Here are a few of the most well established directories below.

https://www.counselling-directory.org.uk
https://www.bacp.co.uk/search/Therapists
https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb
https://nationalcounsellingsociety.org

Counselling Matters We're changing our name! We’re soon to become the National Counselling & Psychotherapy Society (NCPS).

If you choose to pay for a private counsellor, it may feel like an absolute minefield. The main thing to understand is the profession is not regulated. There are many untrained people attempting to call themselves counsellors/therapists/psychotherapists. This doesn’t seem so bad, but if you think, a qualified counsellor has to undertake at least 4 years training and placement experience with an agency, it may make you question what an unqualified counsellor is missing.

To help, regulatory bodies only accept qualified counsellors and enforce ethical frameworks, monitor continued professional development, and provide a disciplinary system.

Check to see if your chosen therapist is registered with one of the approved regulatory bodies below before starting therapy, so you can be assured you’re in safe hands.

*Something to remember: You do not need to feel guilty or afraid to ask any therapist to see their qualifications or membership certificate of a regulatory body. A qualified therapist will be able to provide this immediately, and will understand why you have asked*

Well, I guess now is a good a time as any, as otherwise the anxiety over the idea of a “hard launch” may seem too daunting and I’ll never do it. There are many things still to do, but the page is niggling at me to be opened.

Welcome, to Lucy! The go to place for my upcoming therapy practice and whatever else it decides to be until then. 💕