WheelieMum

I thought I'd use a fun filter to show off my broken nose with a critter on my head but it filtered out most of the good stuff.

In other news I might have fallen off the side of the road well over 6 feet into a gravel ditch landing on my now twisted nose.

So much has happened already in this trip. A book worth already

We are finally on our way to Spain after a year filled with uncertainty and injury.

I've no idea how far I'll get but am still alive and still working hard to live a full life.

I hope to share my thoughts and feelings as this journey of self discovery continues.

Ducky will be catching a lift, though might have to help in the mountains

As I prepare for my next pilgrimage I thought I'd share some words.

This Camino feels very different from my last. I set off last year to take advantage of the well-established route to enable me to undertake a long-distance trek without having to worry about wayfaring or accommodation. I found so very much more, I met amazing people and gained clarity at a time of turmoil

This year I started in January right by the Scottish border and wheeled all the way to Dover with the intention of picking up the pathh del Norte, thus having wheeled all the way from home to Santiago in Spain.

A minor accident meant I no longer had a wheelchair to do it and by the time I got this one the window for me to go had passed. So I planned to go what would be next week on via de la Plata in southern spain because wheelchairs and the rain of autumn in northern Spain are not a good mix.

I managed to 'break' my neck - not quite but the quick explanation. So I took everything off the table and just concentrated on learning to move. That was 2 months ago.

I finally committed to go last week and I'll be headed for via de la Plata at the end of the month.

I happily posted in the corresponding pilgrim group my excitement (post now deleted) and that's when I discovered I needed to do some work on myself, my forgiveness and patience with others. A well-respected and knowledgeable pilgrim in that group decided I should not go and instead do the route designated for wheelchair users I listened and considered his advice but decided to go anyway. He has not let up, he's not given specifics, just that the entire route is not suitable. However he's not stopped there if I ask a question on another pilgrim's photo to assess whether I can pass whatever the challenge is, I feel ridiculed and belittled. I know the route is hard, I know I'm not walking all the way to Santiago but I am going to go and do whatever I can and if it's too hard I'll stop. That was always the plan.

It's that pilgrim who's had the biggest impact, at first negatively, but now I realise they have no bearing on my life and by being prevented (for my own mental health) from posting or commenting in that group I am now doing the pilgrimage much more like the pilgrims of old. I won't have detailed knowledge of what's to come I'll just walk and sleep and work on myself, my connection to the world, and on how I can be a positive influence on the world regardless of how far I get along the actual route.

It's difficult for walking people to understand what does and does not constitute an insurmountable barrier. Accessibility standards have to be high because they are catering to all disabled people and so it's important to remember he's right, very little on these routes would be thought of as accessible but he's wrong in just assuming without sharing specifics, but he doesn't have to, it's not his job to analyse the route just for me.

He may be right, I may find myself relaxing in southern Spain unable to continue the route, whatever I am going, I am going to challenge myself and I'll do whatever I can.

If he does see this post I'd want him to accept my gratitude, he tried to keep me safe, I may not have liked his method but I do know he feels this is an unsafe endeavor, but then where's the adventure in safety? I have weighed the risks and off I will go.

Much love
Carol

Mental Health:

I'm being honest not to get sympathy, I don't think that's what I need. I want to show anyone else struggling that it's ok to struggle.

I am really struggling,

I have managed to get the camping gear out to dry but other than that I have done nothing. I am in bed, exhausted, sad, zero energy. I just have no interest in anything.

I know this is a reaction to the incident and that I will be ok. But right now I just need to take time out.

If you can't do the basics at home, know it's ok. Struggling with mental health is nothing to be ashamed of!. You do not have to feel guilty, any more than you would if you broke your leg.

Remember to reach out for help if you need to. Do not be alone more than you want and is safe for you xx

Lots of love to all. I'll be back, but right now I need some down time. xx

For those who don't know:
I had a serious incident whilst on a trek this week. A solicitor has been made aware and we will be discussing the best way forward as I recover.

In short, I was physically held against my will by a man on the roadside and the police failed to even accept a report.

I haven't put anything out but this is part of a long-distance run from Carlisle to Santiago de Compostela in Spain via Canterbury. I do want to carry on but think I'll take a break, edit the video we have so far and get several stages down the road before I report to avoid anyone knowing what area I am going to be in.

I was wearing the wheeliemum top so for all I know the man is watching this page and to him I want to say, you have not beaten me and I will not be scared into stopping this amazing journey.

I did have the presence of mind to take this photo about 200 meters further down the road to prove I was following a cycle route.

Great long run yesterday. I traveled home by train. Came in and crashed out.

Finally saw my face this morning:

Please can I have suggestions of cultural, religous or other places to visit and people to meet approximately along the route connecting the dots.

I will be setting off from Carlisle in the new year and over many short one or two day trips will be making my way first to Portsmouth and eventually on to Santiago de Compostela - HOPEFULLY. I honestly don't know how realistic this project is. It's not going to be single trip so I'm hoping to be more successful at taking you along with me.

I hope to meet people with interesting stories to tell so if you are from a religion or culture you feel isn't well understood please get in touch.

A wonderful day out a couple of weeks ago to Watendlath.

I'm in my happy place.

Lots more to come today so will try to do a post later

A lovely meet-up with my parents to tell them what's really been happening but also the Beer mat says

'Time is intended to be spent not saved'

even better it's a Wainwright quote! very fitting for some plans I have as I get my fitness back

TRIGGER WARNING
Talk of trauma and unaliving

I consider this video possibly the most important I have made.

It both explains my lack of posts this year and is intended to be empowering and a cautionary tale.

Let the future begin!

Hard Reality and Time to Accept Responsibility TRIGGER WARNINGTalk trauma and unalivingThis video is intended to be empowering to anyone feeling disempowered in the face of authority figures whether that ...

TL/DR: I am no longer with my coach and it's a good thing

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Well it's been a massive week!

Culminating I am no longer with my coach, the final decision was not mine. However, there have been several times I've wanted to quit and being persuaded to carry on. If only I had carried on walking out way back at the hotel in April.

Obviously, I played back many events of life over and over for the last 48 hours and this wanting to leave but not doing so has been a feature in other relationships in my life and something I need to recognise in myself to prevent these things from happening in the future.

Had I been a wheelchair athlete I'm sure this coach could have been a good fit. Had I been more willing to hand over even more control again maybe a good fit. As it is these things are not the case. I wheel to be able to do things most people would think are too risky but I will never consider my achievements to be failures.

I do not plan to find another coach, I will never hand over the level of control I did to this person, the effect has been extremely damaging to my wider life. I am not a full-time athlete.

For now, I'll lick my wounds, try to get a report on the Camino up and move on with my life free from the control of another person, after all not wanting to be controlled is why I am single and so I'm not going to pay another person to exert control over me.

ps if you happen to know who it is please remember this is about being a bad fit and not either one of us being a bad person, there is no need to comment to them in any way.

Reality Strikes

The Camino was amazing and I desperaty want to go through and tell you all about it, give you fastest and slowest miles etc etc and I will but I want to share my post Camino story.

The first couple of days back home were great. I wandered around, I even went wild swimming. TWICE. I honestly thought I had got away with the month long over exhertion but how wrong I was.

Then came the crash, and OMG is it a big one. I tried to push through I even returned to training, though only at low mileages.

As it stands I can only just get around at home. I'm totally dependent on my carer. My pain levels are trying to break all records and my none spine related pain is succeeding with the spine coming up a close second. The 'brain fog' is also trying to break records with this being the first thing I've tried to write.

This is the reality for many disabled and chronically ill people we want to achieve great things, we want to give 110% but if we do we risk this kind of a crash but worse than that some times we don't ever get back to how we were before the crash.

If someone says they need to pace themselves beleive them. They could just be trying to avoid this kind of catastrophic crash.

So what are my plans. First they are to be able to get around again, be able to walk the dogs, be able to to type more than a sentance without a rest, then once that's achieved I'll be fighting my way back into my sport and my challenges.

Please remember your disabled friends. If they keep canceling on you it might just be because they are trying but their body just won't let them join it, keep inviting them, see if they want you to visit and if you do visit and their home is a mess, don't judge, offer to help. The chances are they want to live in a tidy home just as much as you do but if their body is only giving them enough energy to survive they might literally not be able to put away after themselves.

This is the reality for thousands of people, be kind, involve your disabled friends, if they don't return your calls try again, remembering even things you desperatly want to do can be really tough.

Oh and I did 300 miles on camino, much off it off road - please support Parkinsons UK using my link. I half killed myself doing this challenge!

WheelieMum does Camino de Santiago Help Carol Hall raise money to support Parkinson’s UK

Good morning. I climb the equivalent of Snowdon today

The easy way is not always the best way.

I could be sailing along tarmac through industrial suburbs. Instead I am listening to birds and seeing a historic bridge woodland, vineyards and soon a church

Hey all. I'm not doing well at keeping the page up to date.

I am pretty overwhelmed by the kindness of strangers and find it hard to express.

The real amazing things started to happen on Wednesday first with some Herman cyclists coming back down a big hill to want to push me and then bought me a coffee.

Then came the Canadians (Clive or Pierre if you see this please let us know how you are doing lots of people have been asking if you've been seen), who I walked with on and off all day.

Then I got to Fernanda's and her generosity and spirit still brings me to tears. At her house I found my Camino family. Wednesday night we ate like kings and queens. Fernanda's food and company was truly the most wonderful I have experienced.

After breakfast Thursday we left Fernanda's and then the challenge started. I was crawling over boulders and sometimes being pushed by my amazing Camino family. By the top of that path the freewheel was damaged and needed a part changing and right there was a garage. The mechanic helped me change it and even gave me an alen key.

Then last night we went out for dinner and I was carried out of the restaurant!

These are not the only kindnesses I have experienced it all started way back in Porto but these are the most recent.

This sense of community and worldwide family is just what I needed. I hope to be as giving as the people I have met and traveled with

I've already gone the wrong way but sometimes it's worth it

Portuguese Camino de Santiago Day 0 crawling into Porto Cathedral Follow my journey both physical and psychologicalwww.wheeliwmum.org.ukwww.facebook.com/WheelieMumPagewww.justgiving.com/fundraising/wheeliemum-camino-santiago

On the plane, though still loading. Day zero of the Camino

I'll be on BBC radio Cumbria at 4 45 pm talking about the camino

Final preparations are underway for the Camino. Please donate if you can to support Parkinson's UK!
https://www.justgiving.com/fundraising/wheeliemum-camino-santiago

WheelieMum does Camino de Santiago Help Carol Hall raise money to support Parkinson’s UK

Well guys here is the big announcement. Not long to go now until I head off on the next big adventure. Please follow me as I go, here, on youtube and on the wheeliemum website.

This is so important to me, both the adventure / journey and raising vital funds for Parkinsons UK

Website
www.WheelieMum.org.uk

Justgiving
https://www.justgiving.com/fundraising/wheeliemum-camino-santiago

Youtube
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLRcoNVl9wAfpfla6yY_myckPd0lcG3qhj

My Next Big Adventure Well guys here is the big announcement. Not long to go now until I head off on the next big adventure. Please follow me as I go, here, on facebook and on th...

I had an amazing day with my parents on Sunday.

I set off on my own to fly down the hill from Windermere to the Lakeshore to then wheel back up, collect the parents at the station and climb up Orrest Head. A total ascent of 645 feet with the climb itself being 345 feet.

I wheeled almost all of it going forwards, though slowly with only 3 sections going backwards. This really is a testomny of the strength I have gained due to the course with Mickey Bushell Mbe. (btw this course is running again later in the year, it's fully funded and a great opportunity for any wheelchair user wanting to get fitter regardless of your start point.

The walk starts off on a very slippery steep tarmac path but turns off onto compacted earth and gravel. It weaves around to reduce the steapest sections but the steep sections are far steeper than the 1 in 8 maximum it is described as in some guide books.

I did it totally unaided but could not have done at my strength levels a year ago. Dad's powerchair started to overheat and so he took a break partway up. He was using my old invacare tdx and I doubt anything less powerful could manage it without getting damaged. So this really is a route for a true offroad powerchair or large scooter even though none of the surfaces were challenging but the gradient is.

This day was a bit of a turning point for me. I've really been struggling with fitness since covid. However I've been struggling much more psychologically. I've been feeling unfit and like I will never get back to my pre latest injury, pr covid ability. This is a very distructive attitude and one that is clearly incorrect. I will. Some of these problems are due to running such short distances and doing so less often. I've been resting a lot more and with training being intense but short I do a lot less. I find it beyond difficult to stick to the programme so days like this are very important to be able to show myself that I am progressing and I do have the ability.

Turning to my amazing parents now. Mum walked the whole route. This is despite having fractured a vertebrae two years ago and dad also made it to the top, he has MS, Parkinsons and a cancer survivor. It really is physically demanding to do this at his health status in a powerchair. it throws you around and you need to concentrate on the route to take to avoid the chair slipping or getting stuck.

This is a great walk to get great veiws of Windermere and the south lakes mountains. It can safely be done in trainers for walkers but I would say a wheelchair user does need to be strong or have strong helpers. If you can come on up and enjoy some of what Cumbria has to offer

I'll add a short video of me attempting to get to the edge of the rocks (and failing as a separate post)

Not far but it's a start, clawing my way back to activity