Broda Osas

😂😂😂

During this period in the kingdom of darkness, the evil spirits usually have a situation where there's scarcity of food.
Because of this, they usually send out demons to possess the rich so that at least they'll be able to survive this period of time.

So they decided to hold a meeting in preparation to launch out spirits who'd possess men.

In the meeting, an old figure with a pot belly appears at the front of the rest of the already assembled spirits. Because of his stature he is the leader.

The leader: Hunger dey o, no food again.

One of the spirits: as if no be you finish the last food way we suppose chop.

The leader: And so? Na me be the leader abi una want make I die?

One of them: spirit no dey die

The leader: tor, me I dey die, which death fit worst pass hunger. Today we go send just one of us, because this person dey dress nice always, so I believe say he go get money and enough food to chop.

One of the spirits: send me!

The leader: before nko who I wan send before? take this picture (hands the spirit a picture) na the man be this.

The chosen spirit: but you sure say this one dey see food chop so?

The leader: no dey ask me yeye questions.

The chosen spirit: no vex

Disappears and reappear at the front of the man's house in the picture.
The spirit entered and was admiring the house and everything.
soon the spirit brought out a mirror, suprisingly, it's not just a mirror, but a camera.

After taking few selfies, the spirit decided to go live on Deebook, Deesap and Deestagram- a demo*ic social media platform.

The spirit was still greeting his fans, until one hungry looking dog rushed out after the spirit.

Na so evil spirit run round compound almost 9 times, spirit forget say he fit disappear.

Disappeared and ran back to his coven.

Una go read rubbish tire 😂😂😂

I was on my own o, one evul spirit na possessed me because he saw me in a wedding ceremony, well dressed and looking really cute and rich.
At that time I was about collecting my own share of wedding rice since the wedding is almost over.

I kept quiet, even if I knew the evul spirit possessed me because of how rich I dressed.

After the wedding, the evul spirit expected me to enter my personal car, but for where!!!

After trekking for like 5 minutes, the evil spirit spoke out.

Evul spirit: you no get motor ni?

Me: I no get o, na leg I carry come, so na leg I go carry go.

Evul spirit: you no go enter taxi?

Me: where money dey, shi shi I no get

Evul spirit: but why you dress like big man?

Me: so that food go reach me, no be say na me go even chop the food sha.

Evul spirit: who wan chop am?

Me: na my girlfriend

Evul spirit: your house still far? So that I go possess your girlfriend.

Me: noo, e no too far.

After walking for about 4 hours

Evul spirit: you never still reach?

Me: we go soon reach

After trekking for another 4 hours again

Evul spirit: you never still reach?

Me: we go soon reach

Evul spirit: Since how many hours?

Me searching my pocket, only to discover I forgot my house key in the wedding ceremony venue, then turning back.

Evul spirit: where you dey go?

Me: I forget my house key for the wedding ceremony, so I wan trekk go back so that I go collect the key then trekk come back.

The evul spirit:

Sister Debby, I saw you in my dream this morning while blasting in the spirit. You were wearing white caftan with a white scarf, no need to ask the lord because I know you are my partner till we meet at the great day in heaven.
I don't have money, so you better start working, because our wedding bills will be shared 50/50. I will pay half and you will pay half.

Because of my love which I have for you, I have help you and pray.
I give you three days and three nights to come and accept my proposal to you, or else, you will miss this great opportunity. besides you are not too beautiful sef, so bro John will not marry you.

From your beloved brother to his missing rib.

-Bro Osas-

😂😂😂😂

😂

Fact

The fact that she blocked me first 💔😂

Omorrr 😂😂😂

Programme theme: My Hilda must arise 😂

Happy birthday to my dad 😊

More blessings

More grace

More strength.

God bless your new age sir

Nkechi: Osas, please can I borrow 12 million from your hand? I want to do a cooking marathon like Hilda Bassey.

Me:

Me: if she can't cook for 96 hours, she's not a wife material.

Ada and Precious: You think say na with the 500 naira way you dey give us we go use cook for 96 hours?

Me: actually that comment wasn't for you Ada, ordinary doughnut way I say make you prepare, you serve me burnt offering.

Ada: it's because wasn't paying attention to the food na.

Me: after I suffer pay money food, ordinary attention you no fit pay 😒. And you want make I take risk give you 1 million naira so that you go burn my food abi?

Rejoice: Osas rest, yoy way broke pass wetin I no know.

Me: I no broke, na manage I dey manage, because e no easy to work, bring money then just to cook, una go las las cook wetin gods go reject gimme.

Precious: Getat abeg, you way never fit release pass 1000 naira for food, you get mouth dey talk about manage.

Miracle: (sneezes)

Me: You see abi? Na so I go bring money this girl go sneeze inside the food and I no go know.

Miracle: That your indomie way you chop, I sneeze inside am sef

Amaka: Ahhh, stop na hope say na joke?

Miracle: I serious na

Amaka (rushes out to throwup)

Me: Na so I catch Amaka that day as she dey sweat ontop my food 😫, after I don sweat bring money, she add her own sweat ontop.

Everyone except Amaka who is still trying to throwup: Yeeee 🙆🙆

Joy: Nawao, that's disgusting! I can't do such a thing

Me: Rest, you way I catch that day as you dey wash your hand inside food.

Joy: Yes na, so that the Ingredients go enter the food.

Everyone: eeewwwww

Me: Even Ella sef, she deficate (poo) finish, she no wash hand, she con use the same hand make ogbonor soup for us, thank God say I no chop.

Ella: It's not bad na

Everyone 🔽 🔽 🔽

Sister Hilda Azeke 🌚

😂😂😂😂

How to attack a bear

Today you'll know how it feels when you make unnecessary noise in my ear 😑

Couples that filed for divorce came to court on uniform (Ankara) 😂

Them never serious o😂

A short story 😂
Please share 🌚

From the very first time I set my eyes on you, my slippers cut, not because it has worn out. It's because your love was so captivating that I stumbled on a stone.

My love for you is like a transformer, anyone who dares to come in between will get shocked by the love cables 💓

As the strings of ogbonor soup traces it's eater, so also my love will always find you. Because living a day without you is like living a day without food.
Separating me from you is like separating a fish from water (winks 😉)
Are you a magician because any time I'm with you, everything else disappears.

You are the mango seed of my eyes 👀
No one can touch you because I've got you covered with a thick bark.

Find the cat 😂

It took me forever 😹