The Mindful Parent

Mindful Parenting kicks off in 3 days time. If you're not sure if it's for you, here's some encouragement from a recent participant:

"It’s excellent and hands down has had the most impactful influence on my parenting in 9.5 years 😂 I have heaps of friends who have found it similarly life changing! As a Paediatrician, I know there are lots of parenting courses out there, this one is my fave and grounded in science, psychology and Shirley’s own experience with 5 children."

Follow the Event link below or register here on our website -

Renew Your Mind - Mindful Parenting Join a mindful parenting course to reduce parenting stress and create stronger connections with your children.

Come along to my Mindful Parenting Q+A on Tuesday morning at the gorgeous Global Baby store in Epsom. I'd love to see you there 💛.

Join us in store next Tuesday for a Q & A event with Shirley Pastiroff, author of The Mindful Parent. A chance for you to chat to Shirley about questions you have from the book, mindful parenting, and staying chill as a parent in 2023! This is a free event, and parking is available. Babies are welcome.

https://renewyourmind.co.nz/mindful-parenting/

If you're stuck in an endless round of rewards and consequences with your children, you know that dance of taking away the stuff they love to get the behaviours you want, come and explore a radical new way of parenting. Mindful Parenting keeps connection at the heart of your home, whilst achieving the seemingly impossible - kids who start listening to what you say, and become internally motivated to do life well, leaving you free to truly enjoy them.

All the Mindful Parenting material is based in contemporary neuroscience and is research-based. and we're counting down.

Just one week to go.

Follow the event link for the Auckland in-person course strating Aug 11th or register for the Online/on Demand version starting Aug 10th.

A FEW PLACES LEFT!
If lockdown has had you a bit more exhausted by parenting than usual, why don't you join me on my upcoming 6-week Mindful Parenting course, kicking off tomorrow? I'll arm you with research-based parenting techniques and tools that help you stay calm in the middle of even the most chaotic days. Learn how to reduce stress, improve family relationships and create deep, lasting connections with your children. This course is held at Glendowie Primary School from Wed 24 Feb 2021, 7.30 – 9pm for 6 weeks. $150pp or $250 per couple. Register on renewyourmind.co.nz/mindful-parenting

So exciting - I will be on Instagram live this Thursday evening, 7.30pm, for some Mindful Parenting Q&A! Follow https://www.instagram.com/globalbabynz and join us for a fun convo! Love Shirley 💛

I'll be doing an Instagram live with Shirley Pastiroff, author of The Mindful Parent, on Thursday the 11th of February, at 7:30pm. If you start reading now you can probably get through a good chunk of it before the live (it's a surprisingly easy read).

At the IG live Shirley will be able to answer your mindful parenting questions.

Our customers are telling us that this book really resonates with them. The Mindful Parent is packed full of useful tips to help you stay sane, stay calm, and stay connected with your children, despite the chaos of family life!

Written by Shirley Pastiroff, an Auckland mindfulness coach, counsellor, and mother of five. Shirley uses research-based mindfulness techniques to help us stop loosing our sh*t.

You can order The Mindful Parent from our online store, or pop in to our Epsom store and pick up a copy.

Shop now: https://globalbaby.co.nz/collections/books-for-parents/products/the-mindful-parent

xx
Anita

Struggling with your child having a tanty or two? Maybe you will find this article interview I had with a bit helpful - let me know :) ✨💛Shirley

Ooooh Thrive to Five are giving away a copy of my book! Follow the link to enter. And have the best Fri-yay! ✨

AND THE WINNER IS... Kristi-Lee Heron!! Congrats and please pm us your address so we can send you this fantastic book for some holiday season reading.

GIVEAWAY TIME! We have a copy of Shirley Pastiroff's new book "The Mindful Parent" to give away. Full of practical techniques for creating and maintaining calm connections with your kids - timely with school holidays nearly upon us!

Simply share this post, like our page (if you haven't already!) and tag someone who'd like to win.

Winner will be drawn 12th December 🧡

I recently wrote a piece for Capsule, a website that hosts the 'ultimate curated collection of smart stories and relatable rants, brought to you by former editors and writers of New Zealand’s best magazines'. The article was also covered by Stuff. Pretty cool. They called it 'The Parenting Advice that Could Make Your Life SO Much Easier'. With sales pitches like that, what could go wrong?

Hope you get something out of it, and if you like what you read, perhaps you also want my lil' book in a stocking in or two? Hehe. You can get it from renewyourmind.co.nz/themindfulparent

Love Shirley x

https://www.stuff.co.nz/life-style/well-good/teach-me/300164972/found-the-parenting-advice-that-could-make-life-so-much-easier

"The day you become a responsible parent is the day you stop being an obedient child." ~ Glennon Doyle in her book 'Untamed'.

Controversial I know, but I’ve been thinking about this idea a lot over the last few weeks. We all inherit so much from our folks about how to live and how to love - some of these ideas are really helpful and inspiring, and some maybe less so. Either way, hopefully the love you have from your own parents will sustain for the rest of your lives, but the relationship has to evolve to stay healthy. Your parents' work of role-modelling a healthy life, and especially how to parent, is over, and you now get to explore what you take with you, what to leave behind and how to bring your own beautifully unique spin on life, and pass that incredible recipe on to your children. If obedience to your parents is getting in the way of your own parenting journey, it really is your turn now.

For more parenting encouragement, check out my first book, 'The Mindful Parent', available on Amazon and Book Depository or, for local NZ delivery, from renewyourmind.co.nz/themindfulparent

Shirley 💛

One of my favourite quotes from one of my favourite poets.

For more on living a little bit more in the present moment every day, check out my first book, The Mindful Parent, available on Amazon and Book Depository or, for local NZ delivery, from renewyourmind.co.nz/themindfulparent

Shirley x

Wonderful feedback on The Mindful Parent from Katrina Rapley, Editor of Oh Baby! magazine. 💃

She says, "Wow, I’m kind of lost for words regarding your book Shirley. I am SO not into self-help-ey books of any kind but I am DEVOURING The Mindful Parent. It’s riveting…and funny!"

Awww the feels. 😊 Thanks for the love Katrina.

FYi, Oh Baby Magazine is a modern lifestyle read for mamas and is all about loving and empowering parents on their parenting journey. Love their work!

If you are finding The Mindful Parent helpful, one of the most profound ways you can support newbie authors like me is to leave a review on Amazon. If this is something you would like to do, please visit https://www.amazon.com/Mindful-Parent-Shirley-Pastiroff/dp/0473520168 and leave a review and a ⭐ rating. If you are feeling particularly pumped, sharing it with your friends would also mean the world to me. Thank you!

Shirley x

Mindfulness is Paying Attention with Kindness and Curiosity

In the mornings, after the kids have gone to school and before I see my first client, I sit on my beanbag under my favourite blanket with a strong coffee and my phone timer set to however long I want to sit. Sometimes a couple of minutes, sometimes as much as 20. And I just notice. I notice my breathing, or what I can see, hear, smell and taste.

Some days I feel relaxed, other days fidgety, some days my thoughts go nuts, occasionally there’s profound peace. But I do it pretty much everyday, and slowly, incrementally my brain grows ‘greener’ and healthier every time I do.

What mindful practises do YOU do each day?

For more on how to establish a simple daily mindful practise, grab a copy of The Mindful Parent, available on Amazon and Book Depository or, for local NZ delivery, from renewyourmind.co.nz/themindfulparent

Shirley x

I have been a bit quiet because of and but recently managed to catch up with Clinical Psychologist, Jacqui Maguire, to discuss mindfulness and how we sometimes lose our intuition around how to bring up our kids.

Hope you find this podcast episode helpful >> https://podcasts.apple.com/nz/podcast/mind-brew/id1511693746?i=1000495392830

Love Shirley x

A friend of mine has started using one of my favourite emotion processing techniques with her kids. It’s very simple and goes like this:

Your child is showing signs they’re upset and instead of trying to talk them down, you tell them you can see they’re scared, sad or mad, or whatever emotion they look like they might be feeling. Then you validate, and say that makes perfect sense because they lost at rugby... the ipad’s broken…. their sister just wallopped them... it’s bedtime, and so on. Then you pause briefly and see what happens.

She had been using it with some success with her 4 year-old, and then yesterday he got stuck in his jumper and his little body was writhing in frustration at not being able to untangle himself. She moved towards him to help, and was about to acknowledge his feelings when from within the jumper she heard, “I am not scared, I am not sad and I am NOT MAD!”

My first book, ‘The Mindful Parent’, is available for pre-order on Amazon and Book Depository or, for local NZ delivery, from renewyourmind.co.nz/themindfulparent

Happy holidays everyone!

Shirley x

“How lucky we are to be alive right now!”

If you’ve somehow managed to miss the extraordinary, award-winning musical 'Hamilton', cancel all your plans for this evening, find it on Disney Plus, settle in and enjoy.

If you know it well, why not do the same thing?

As parents we all need little slices of green-brain magic wherever we can get them. 

“Look around. Look around. How lucky we are to be alive right now….”

Shirl 💛

IS GETTING YOUR KIDS OUT OF THE HOUSE TOTAL CARNAGE?
Do you find yourself hoping against hope every morning that your kids will wake up happy, eat their breakfast, put their clothes on and leave the house with calm serenity and maybe with all their belongings? And does your morning more often turn to custard before you've stumbled out of bed, let alone out of the door? After my hopes were dashed day after day, year after year... I discovered 'natural results'. Totally life-changing! Check out my article with Family Times for more info. Shirley x

Mindful parenting - Family Times SHIRLEY PASTIROFF, counsellor, parent coach and mum of five, shares her insights into the importance of setting boundaries. A few years ago our mornings were awful. I would wake up every day already anxious about the repeatedly ignored instructions, the arguing, and the meltdowns that were likely .....

Thankyou Ido Drent - activist, actor, devoted dad and all-round good dude. Shirley x

“Raise your words,
not your voice.
It is rain that
grows flowers,
not thunder.” ~ Rumi

When we learn how to offer our rain instead of our thunder to our kids when they are struggling to live well, we offer them an incredible gift. When they're tantrumming, refusing, swearing, fighting, giving up, disrespectful, not at all resilient or just screen-addicted - these are the moments they most need to grow a little. That's when they need our rain and not our thunder.

For more on a mindful approach to conflict and boundary-setting, my first book, The Mindful Parent, is available on Amazon and Book Depository or, for local NZ delivery, from renewyourmind.co.nz/themindfulparent

Shirley x

Instead of living your life for your kids, have a go at living the kind of life you’d love your kids to live. They’ll copy you anyway, whichever you do.

This is an invitation to freedom, not to irresponsibility. Everytime a child sees a parent truly enjoying themselves, it fills their love tanks. Even if your child isn’t there to see you, the ripple effect of your joy does the same. Give them a legacy of joy not sacrifice - it’s better for their present well-being and for their future happiness.

My first book, The Mindful Parent, is available on Amazon and Book Depository or, for local NZ delivery, from renewyourmind.co.nz/themindfulparent

Shirley x

NZ's fave TV gal, presenter and communicator, Petra Bagust, is also a great friend and a fun, creative and inspiring parent. Thanks for being such a great ally on the mindful journey P!

My first book, The Mindful Parent, is available on Amazon and Book Depository or, for local NZ delivery, from renewyourmind.co.nz/themindfulparent.

Have an epic Wednesday!

Shirley x

3 signs you’re in Green Brain presence:

~ You can feel your feet on the ground
~ Your body and your mind are in the same place at the same time
~ Your kids enjoy being around you

Green brain exists at the opposite end of the spectrum to red. I call it the calm and present brain, or the cushioned brain, which is my way of describing the protection we feel in green brain from the inevitable triggers of our everyday lives. The hormones produced in our body in this state are serotonin, oxytocin and dopamine, all of which play different roles.

Despite how wonderful it feels, green brain is not the resting, relaxing or recovering brain; it’s actually the normal, everyday brain. Our bodies and our minds are perfectly designed to be calm and present and to live with green as our main brain state. When we consider some of the other things happening in our bodies while we are in green, it’s clear that we function best physiologically, psychologically, and in our relationships with others when we’re in a green-brain state.

Want to know more? My first book, The Mindful Parent, is available on Amazon and Book Depository or, for local NZ delivery, from renewyourmind.co.nz/themindfulparent

Shirley x

3 signs you may be parenting in Orange Brain busyness.

~ The world is moving fast around you
~ Your ‘one wild and precious life’ has got lost somewhere in the To Do list
~ You don’t remember the last time you noticed you were breathing

Just like the traffic lights, orange is in between red and green and is what I would refer to as the busy or goal-focused brain. It’s the go-go- go brain and chances are high that you’ll recognise it. On my Mindful Parenting course, I get to survey hundreds of parents and the majority identify with orange as their dominant brain state.

Orange brain makes a lot of lists, either literal ones or internal check- lists. It’s just a little bit ahead of itself all the time. It could be a few minutes ahead, like when you are thinking about your baby’s next nap; a few days ahead, maybe focusing on Friday night; or, if you’re a big planner or running your own business, it could even be a few years ahead. Orange brain also has what is referred to as ‘monkey mind’; it jumps around all over the place and finds it hard to settle. In orange brain we tend to be slightly tense and a bit frowny. We move quickly and often get quite easily distracted.

Want to know more? My first book, The Mindful Parent, is available on Amazon and Book Depository or, for local NZ delivery, from renewyourmind.co.nz/themindfulparent

Shirley x

3 signs you may be parenting in Red Brain stress:

~ You jump when your kids yell or break things
~ You feel overwhelmed
~ A wee break in hospital feels appealing

Red brain exists on a spectrum and is triggered by anything you find stressful or threatening. It could be your email inbox, your bank statement, your two-year olds’ tantrum, your teenager’s door-slam or your own self-critical thinking.

Red brain is the ‘fight-or-flight’ brain-state, and it’s been hard-wired into our brains through millions of years of evolution. It’s the tiger-in- the-jungle brain and the hormones produced in our bodies while we’re in red brain are cortisol and adrenaline. Red brain is the perfect brain state for emergencies…. but NOT for parenting.

Want to know more? My first book, The Mindful Parent, is available on Amazon and Book Depository or, for local NZ delivery, from renewyourmind.co.nz/themindfulparent

Shirley x

To be joyful we need 4 ingredients: Happiness, Fear, Sadness and Anger.

Somewhere, somehow I learnt that to be joyful meant to be happy. When I discovered that we need all of our emotions to experience joy - and OUR KIDS DO TOO (eek!) - it was a total revelation.

No more need for….“Shh shh - it’s ok - don’t cry!“, “Calm down hun, it’s really not that bad!” and not even “Seriously, it’s just cauliflower!”

Instead I can just breathe, and mutter something about it being the most normal thing in the world to find life scary, sad, sweet or freakin’ frustrating.

Half my parenting job is now totally redundant. That’s joy.

Shirley 💛

The Mindful Parent is available on Amazon and Book Depository or, for local NZ delivery, from renewyourmind.co.nz/themindfulparent

Did you hear my book is now officially launched worldwide?! Thanks to each and everyone of you who have purchased it so far! So indebted. And a little bit overwhelmed. Shirl 💛

Here's the pitch if you're curious:

"Provocative, life-changing and kind, this book will transform how you think about yourself as a parent, as well as transforming how you parent. The Mindful Parent is a timely and liberating journey back to the heart of what really matters — a deep and lasting relationship with our children. Its unique approach weaves together the latest in neuroscience, personal story and deceptively simple strategies that are so kind and effective it’s hard not to use them."

The Mindful Parent is available on Amazon and Book Depository or for local NZ delivery from renewyourmind.co.nz/themindfulparent. RRP $35 NZD.

Thank you Nathan Wallis for supporting my book and being an inspirational believer in mindfulness work. Follow this man for amazing insights into parenting, family dynamics, neuroscience and thinking about thinking! Shirl x

The Mindful Parent is available from Amazon and Book Depository or local NZ delivery from renewyourmind.co.nz/themindfulparent

Eeep! Back on the tele tonight for an interview with on the launch of my first book, The Mindful Parent. Tune in if you can. Ps: eeep! Shirley x

Such a fun live chat on parenting fails and wins! Grab a cuppa and check it out over here >> https://www.facebook.com/watch/live/?v=644657033096293 >> Thanks Parenting Place! Shirl x