La Vie Est Belle

"I never understand the word "surrender" until I had to"

It was November 9, 2022 when I took the courage to apply in my dream university, I was no idea after all and to be honest, ayaw ko pa nga no'ng una since natatakot ako but I did it anyway. Upon application, it took me couple of hours in waiting sa portal bago ko pa nasubmit ang mga requirements. Araw-araw kong chinecheck yung portal to see any update. November 23, 2022 my heart was rejoicing! my application was finally approved after days of waiting. Praise God dahil ako yung unang na approved sa klase namin although maraming mga ahead sakin. As stated, my entrance examination will be on January 07, 2023 so, I allotted the whole Christmas break in reviewing basic knowledge and abstracts. I downloaded a lot of softcopies reviewers, I watched so many videos, read, study, review and repeat. Wala akong ibang ginawa kundi ang magprepare lang for the upcoming exam.

January 7, 2023 here comes the day na pinakaaabangan ko, kabado pero sabi ko this is it, pinaghandaan ko 'to kaya labarn. At isa pa sabi ko "di naman ako dadalhin dito ng Lord kung wala lang". I believed in my heart na may great purpose kung bakit nandun ako nung araw na yun. There is a seed of hope and bravery—God has planted a dream in my heart. I never been this so excited before. At 6:00 am bumyahe na agad ako kasi malayo layo rin ang Batangas sa Quezon, pagsakay sa bus struggle kasi sobrang lamig kala ko nga di nako makakarating ng buhay haha, kidding aside lamigin po kasi ako. Ansama ng pakiramdam ko pagbaba ng bus, then sumakay na'ko nun sa jeep diretso sa university and before mag 9:00 nakarating na rin sa wakas. Ansaya kasi, ganito pala yung pakiramdam ng magccollege na, lakas maka independent. I've actually met a lot of faces there, and each has a different stories of hope and courage. We wait for almost four hours before we took the exam, 1:00 pm finally nagstart na then 3:00 natapos. Paglabas ko, wala akong ibang narinig kundi ang hiyaw ng mga estudyanteng nagsisimula palang mangarap kagaya ko .."Lord, sana naman po makapasa!!" I smiled habang pinagmamasdan ang matataas na buildings, hindi man rinig pero yun din kasi ang sinisigaw ng puso ko, na nawa, loobin ng Lord ang lahat ng 'to.

Psalm 138:8 (ESV) says: “The Lord will fulfill his purpose for me; your steadfast love, O Lord, endures forever

I always thank God for giving me my best people, my support system. Family, friends, pastor, classmates, and churchmates. Days had passed and we've planned things I needed to do kapag nag aaral na'ko dun, I also prepare myself narin dahil that time I do believe that God will use my life mightily in that place. I have fixed my eyes to a place where I thought I am supposed to be in.

"I've seen myself there already—learning, growing, cultivating, and reaching my dreams"

Nakareserve na rin yung boarding house ko dun, and everything was definitely fine and smooth, kaya palagay talaga ang loob ko.

For almost 5 months of waiting, finally may result na!! May 30, 2023 while preparing for my semi finals exam, I received a lot of calls and messages stating that the results are out. Kinabahan talaga ako sobra that moment, hindi di ko alam ang gagawin, nanginginig buong kalamnan ko haha. I immediately go to Piso wifi to check my portal, but I can't open it so pumunta na'ko kina tita para sa mas malakas na wifi. Bago ako umalis, nagbilin muna ako .."kapag nakita nyokong tumatalon mamaya ibig sabihin pasado, pag naiyak naman alam nyo na haha, biro ko pa"

"Thank you for participating the application"

As I opened the portal, ito yung bumungad sakin. Naluluha na'ko pero di pwede, strong tayo. I take a deep breath, at nirestart ng nirestart ang portal pero ganon parin ang lumalabas. Pagabi na din at umuulan na kaya umuwi na'ko samin, maya maya diko na napigilan, I cried so hard in the middle of the dark road hanggang sa makauwi. Hindi ko matanggap na ganon ang resulta. Ibang klaseng sakit kapag pangarap na yung pinag uusapan.

Maraming nagsasabi na hindi pa raw yon ang final result kasi may problema ang portal, kaya umasa ako na baka may chance pa. June 1 & 2 I took semi finals exam without even reviewing dahil kahit anong gawin ko ang hirap magfocus. Nag eexam ako pero yung utak ko lumilipad kakaisip sa result.

June 2, 2023— this pointed everything, final result, I didn't pass in my dream university.

This is probably the biggest heartbreak I ever experienced—to be under qualified, to be rejected, to failed myself and people around me. It turns my hope into heartbreak. Sobrang durog na durog ang puso ko that time. I find it hard to accept and let go. Hindi lang dahil pangarap ko yun, kundi dahil hindi lang naman ako ang nag aabang ng resulta, pati na rin ang mga tao sa paligid ko : (
."maaring may mga plano tayo, pero kung hindi naka align yung plans na yun sa will ng Lord, hindi yun mangyayari" sabi sakin ng mentor ko.

As Proverbs 16:9 says "In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps."

And this was true, we can make so many plans, pero kung ang mga plano na yun ay hindi naman plano ng Diyos para satin, wala tayong magagawa. Masakit, sobra, lalo na dahil nag uumpisa pa lamang ako.

But ofcourse, it doesn't end here. If there is "REJECTION", there is also "REDIRECTION". God is not yet done writing my story—He will fulfill His purpose for me. I may fall seven times, but I will rise up eight (by God's grace).

God can put a dream in our hearts for a purpose, but God can also remove that dream for a PURPOSE. 🌹

I pray that one day, I'll be able to say, "thank you Lord for not giving me that dream, now, I understand". 🤍

...sa susunod na magmamahal, nawa'y wala ng takot. Wala ng alinlangan. Wala ng pangamba na muli ay masaktan. Hindi na matatakot na sumubok. Muling magmamahal ng malaya, payapa at walang halong pagmamadali, puso naman natin ang s'yang magwawagi.

Words by lavieestbelle
Photo not mine

Instagram.com/Ms.lavieestbelle

Naway maging madali ang pagbitaw, sa mga oras na may pag aalinlangan, sa mga pagkakataong puno ang isip ng katanungan, at sa tuwing ang puso ay hirap ng maunawaan. Namaalam, bumalik, namaalam. Ang muling iwanan sa pangalawang pagkakataon, muling sirain ang tiwala na matagal na binuo, muling ukitan ang puso na saglit na sinuyo. Umasa, nagtiwala at muling naniwala. Sumugal sa walang kasiguraduhan, hinayaan ang pusong muling masaktan. Tama nga ang sabi ng iba, hindi lahat ng laban ay dapat ipaglaban, lalo na kung pagmamahal ang palaging puhunan, at ang puso ang syang laging talunan.

words by lavieestbelle
photo not mine

Instagram.com/Ms.lavieestbelle

Isn't it amazing how we cared in the most inconspicuous part of our body? just like our feet.🐾

Lately, I was talking to myself, "grabe kawawa naman yung paa ko" while walking under the sun since everything in me was covered aside from my feet. And so after I uttered that soft whisper, I tried my best to keep it away from the sunlight so it won't be expose anymore.

What I'm trying to say in this scenario is, "YOU ARE ALWAYS MATTER" whatever your position in the body of Christ. Not because you are "just this or that" doesn't mean you're less important. We might be different from each other, having different perspective, characteristics, attitude, goal and purpose in life, but we are all valuable and equal in the eyes of our Heavenly Father above. Maaaring hindi natin kapareho ng posisyon ang iba, maaaring sa ibang bagay ng Diyos tayo dinala, at maaaring hindi tayo kasing taas ng gampanin nila. But what God telling us today is, you are nevertheless forgotten, hindi ka nakakaligtaan ng Panginoon, kung nasasaktan ka man ngayon, nahihirapan, nasusugatan, remember that God always sees you and there is a great purpose why it must happen. God is always there to save you in times you need Him. ✨

If we can set our eyes on our feet, what more the Lord can do for His children? Kung nagagawa nating maging concern sa ating mga paa, paano pa ang Panginoon diba?

This is a reminder na hindi dahil nandyan ka sa posisyon mo ngayon ay kinakaligtaan kana, you are always loved, seen, and matter in God's eyes. 🌷

Isaiah 49:15-16 Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she has borne? Though she may forget, I will not forget you! See I have engraved on the palms of my hands; your walls are ever before me.

Instagram.com/ms.lavieestbelle

Photo: Nontapan Nuntasiri

to everyone who is hurting in various ways, remember that HIS love is always sufficient for our broken hearts. ✨

Being rejected, left behind, and forgotten doesn't mean you are no longer deserving and worthy to be love. You are always special, seen, valid, and enough to the eyes of our Father in heaven. 🌷

-lavieestbelle

"Even though I'm in the storm the storm is not in me "

And when you realize how God has been so faithful to your life, you will eventually pause in the midst of agony and thank Him for everything He has done. Sometimes we became so focus on the storm that we don't see the fortress -- our stronghold, a safe place that is always present. If you are going through difficulty right now, please bear in mind that storm doesn't last, it may cause damage, but it cannot ruin you and the plans that had been planned for you. There might be storm but there is always Someone Who is greater than it. 🤍

"Be the person that makes others feel included."

Kamahal mahal ka, hindi man makita ng iba. 🤍

-happy hearts month peeps!

To the one I once loved,

thank you for choosing not to stay in times when I need you the most, in times where I am so shattered, drowned, and so overwhelmed in all the realities surrounding me. Thank you for not choosing to stay when I am so vulnerable and have nothing to offer but my genuine and pure love. I'm sorry that my younger self doesn't have any idea of what true love is, maybe she doesn't even felt it before.

You've left her hanging and guessing without any exact words to tell goodbye, but don't worry dear, she totally understood. In spite of everything, thank you for not keeping this almost a love story. It makes me ponder, that maybe-------you're not the one for me.

It took years to finally let you go, but grateful that I am able to do so. Indeed, some things may end so beautiful things may begin. I have learned and grown so much, thank you for not holding on, because I finally found the love that is worth fighting for (a love that is selfless and unconditional- a love that doesn't expect something in return).

Salamat sa pagbitaw, mas nakilala ko ang sarili ko, at ang Diyos sa buhay ko. 🤍

Why is it important to take every step slowly? 💫

In these days where time is indeed "gold" and "rest" became optional, may we still be able to take every step of our journey "slowly". Slowly doesn't mean you have to chill and relax, it doesn't mean giving yourself so much time to things that aren't matter. It only means that you have to pause and breathe sometimes and then continue to move forward after. Slowly simply means "doesn't pressuring yourself at all". Honestly, I am guilty with these, whenever I am taking rest even just 5minutes, I thought I already wasting time, that I am supposed to do something and be productive. But then I realized the essence of taking one step at a time.

So here are my 5 beautiful reasons why it is important to take every step slowly:

1. It helps us see the beauty in the process.
Slowing down helps us realize that there is something beautiful along the path we are taking, it opens our eyes to the things that we can't even see and appreciate before. We will learn to embrace every moments and be joyful.

2. It allows us to be beginner.
Taking one step at a time will bring us into humbleness that will lead into realization that we are just "starting our journey and that we don't need to rush things and dwell into what other people says". Slowing down brings us back to the starting point in which we can find the "where" and "why" we are started.

3. It opens the door for a grateful heart
Taking our step slowly will bring so much joy and peace to our hearts, we will learn to be thankful most of the time instead of complaining why we remain on the old same pages. As what they've said, "successful are those people who enjoy the process and not just those who focused on the result".

4. It helps us to celebrate small wins
When we learn not to rush things, it will gives us opportunity not just to appreciate but also celebrate our small wins with the people we treasured the most.

5. And lastly, "it makes us wiser in making decisions"
Kung palagi tayong nagmamadali na makuha yong mga bagay na gusto natin, for sure we will not allot so much time to think for WHAT'S BEST, because we will settle for what is "simplest and easiest" ways. Hindi na tayo mag eeffort dahil nakapokus na ang isip natin sa present moments. So take that steps slowly but surely. And always keep in mind to "seek Him first, and His guidance so you can clearly find the right ways towards the right path."

Godbless your hearts, we will all get there little fighters!

welcoming the year with a grateful heart 🫶

happy new year, everyone!

Things to be grateful this year (⁠ ⁠◜⁠‿⁠◝⁠ ⁠)⁠♡

1. You survive - a lot of other people wanted to live more but they just can't dahil narating na nila ang endpoint ng kanilang buhay. And no matter how much they want to spend their life with the people they love, wala ng oras, wala ng pagkakataon. "Yung mga taong nawala sa buhay natin, ay wala ng pag asang babalik pa" because they no longer have chance to.

There are so many heartbreaking stories this year and if you are still able to read this right now then you have to be grateful because you survive all the seen and unseen battles of this life. Sometimes, we become so ungrateful only because we didn't meet what we are supposed to, that we don't see, appreciate and celebrate the fact that we survived.

2. You've made it this far - do you still remember when was the time that you've prayed about where you are today? I know you have been through the best and worst version of yourself this year but let me tell you that you are so far beyond where you are before. You have grown so much, you have learned when to keep and let go of other people, you no longer look for approval of others, you've learned to value yourself and you are now living in your own beautiful purpose.

3. You have the chance to continue your journey.
If you failed to attain all your goals this year, there are still chance to make it for another year, in a better and more wonderful ways. And I do hope that all your learnings will be use to step through another season.

May the peace and joy that comes from Christ rule in our hearts this new year. Magpatuloy para sa sarili, pamilya at lalo't higit sa Panginoon. Shalom! 🌸

and, if you are experiencing the same thing, let me tell you that there's nothing wrong with that. We have our own different ways of expressing our love to people. If we can't talk and bond with them, maybe we can pray for them instead. Pray that may they always find joy and peace in their hearts.

We can mind our own business and at the same time root for the people we love. 🌷

For some, this is just a normal day, and it's okay. I am rooting for you🎄

...and to be weak even when everyone else remain strong 💫

Instagram.com/Ms.lavieestbelle

Girl in the field painting by Meliha Trako
| Saatchi Art

words by lavieestbelle

🌱

Cliché to say but, “If you have already tasted and experienced the best kind of love — 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘭𝘭 𝘯𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘴𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘭𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘭𝘦𝘴𝘴.” I thank God for I have tasted and see His great love and from that, I am forever satisfied.

11.11.22

“𝐆𝐨𝐝, 𝐢𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐤𝐞𝐞𝐩 𝐦𝐞 𝐚𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐲𝐨𝐮, 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐈 𝐝𝐨𝐧’𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐢𝐭.”

As a single woman, I have this firm principle that if this man will keep me away from loving and serving my First Love then I don’t want him to enter in my heart. I also have this solidified standard that if it is God’s best, I have nothing to compromise — my relationship with my family and friends, churchmates and disciples and most especially, my relationship with God.

I pray for someone who will honor and respect my relationship with God. Someone who will not see me as a competitor in the ministry but a team-mate for God’s vision and mission. That’s why I desire to have an intimate relationship with God than anyone else because this is the kind of relationship I don’t want to lose. It might sound too religious but yes, that’s how I am in love with the Author of life.

Cliché to say but, “If you have already tasted and experienced the best kind of love — 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘭𝘭 𝘯𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘴𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘭𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘭𝘦𝘴𝘴.” I thank God for I have tasted and see His great love and from that, I am forever satisfied.

My satisfaction & completion comes only from God, then who am I to find it on my future partner?

And, if the day will come that my season of singleness has ended, this is my one and only prayer, “𝘿𝙚𝙖𝙧 𝙂𝙤𝙙, 𝙞𝙛 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙨 𝙧𝙚𝙡𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙨𝙝𝙞𝙥 𝙞𝙨 𝙣𝙤𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙬𝙞𝙡𝙡, 𝙥𝙡𝙚𝙖𝙨𝙚 𝙟𝙪𝙨𝙩 𝙧𝙚𝙢𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙛𝙚𝙚𝙡𝙞𝙣𝙜.” This prayer may be too scary and painful, but I know that a life with someone without God is not life at all. I would rather lose someone that I love that lose the love Himself.

This is my covenant with the Lord – I will honor Him in all seasons & at all cost, not just in the season of singleness, again, 𝙞𝙣 𝙖𝙡𝙡 𝙨𝙚𝙖𝙨𝙤𝙣𝙨. Dear single woman — May you never trade your relationship with God to anyone else. Promise? Promise. 🖤

https://www.instagram.com/p/Ck0qcnRpTqZ/?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=

oh to be covered by God's amazing love🫶🏽🥹

so no matter where you are, surely, God will sustain you. 🌸
_________

words by lavieestbelle
photo from

I have learned so much as I have explored what true gratitude is-- being grateful each day, each moment of failures and victories, joy and sorrows, rejections and acceptance. Indeed, life is not about having all our desires and all the entitlements here in this world, but it is about thanking and offering our highest praise to our Creator for giving more than what we needed.

Past week and months have been so tough and heavy, as if we are racing in a battles filled with deadline, schedule, and rules to follow, this life has offered so much lately, and to be honest, it's a quiet tiring and draining. We did our best, and still failed, we tried but lost, we fought, and yet stumbled. We've been wait for so long, but still waiting, hoping that our turn will finally come.

But despite of all the longingness, what I loved the most is that God never fails to remind me to be grateful, to thank Him in my highest and even in my lowest. To be grateful in every people and situations no matter how bad they are. To be a person that honors Him in the midst of pain and chaos, to rejoice in our breakings, and to still have a grateful heart even when sometimes it hurts.

A grateful heart is all that we needed in these days, and I think it's wonderful if gratitude is one of the things we choose to learn each day, it really make difference. ✨

"It's not about "count your blessings, name them one by one" kind of gratitude to God. I am talking about a deep sense of awe ingrained in our minds. I am talking about an awareness, in every waking moment, of glorious truth that the God of the universe is infinite in all of His perfections. And He loves us." - Mary K. Mohler

So to you who is hurting, trying and fighting with all your best, remember that there is always a "joy" in every thankful heart. 🌷

Dear little fighter,

I'm sorry for all the wounds you chose to hide because you don't want anyone else to see it. I'm sorry for all your unsaid thoughts and desires that makes you feel so dumb and worthless. I am sorry for those hurtful words you chose to kept just to make everything at peace. I am sorry for not having all the things you once strived and prayed for. And lastly, I am sorry that at this point of time, you are still waiting, longing, trying, and seeking for where you should be in. My heart goes out to you, and I know that the Lord’s heart is for you even more.

He sees, loves, and values you, dear. Mahigpit na yakap! 🌷

It is always "His will" that matters 🌷

Minsan kasi, may mga laban na hindi naman talaga para sa atin, so better to keep waiting than to waste everything. Maghintay sa tamang oras na para sa atin na talaga ang laban, na tayo naman ang susuong ng walang pag-aalinlangan.

It took a long period of time for you to be where you are, so I hope that you will finally choose wisdom and clarity over bravery. Huwag sayangin lahat ng natutunan, pinag-aralan, at prosesong pinagdaanan--para lang may patunayan. 🌷

Instagram.com/Ms.lavieestbelle

Trust that He sees, He cares and He listens...

Sapat na siguro ang sandaling pahinga upang muling magpatuloy- ang sandaling pag-idlip upang mapawi lahat ng bigat na dala ng maghapon, ang malalim na paghinga upang mapakalma ang sarili sa bawat pag-aalala, ang paghigop ng mainit na kape sa paborito nating tasa, ang saglit na pagbabalik-tanaw sa layo ng ating narating na, at higit sa lahat, sapat na siguro ang simpleng "kumusta?" upang makalkula kung ayos ka nga lang ba talaga.

I really love seeing persistent people. Those who are tired yet still fighting, those who have a lots of unfamiliarities but willing to embrace adjustments, those average people that knew their weaknesses and limitations but still doing their very best to figure out things around them, and those that are hopeless, pressured, weary, and burdened--I really love your PERSEVERANCE AND PURE HEART WITH CLEAR INTENTIONS. I believe that you are doing all of these for a great & beautiful purpose. You are seen and appreciated--little warrior! ✨

Hebrews 10:36 "You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised."

Keep the fire of your heart burning. And always remember that......You, matters🌷

Loved,
La Vie Est Belle

It's okay to cry if must. You are not supposed to be strong at all times. 🤍

God is still good even when days are bad, so keep on trusting that He is doing something great out of your uncertainties 🌼