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FlamingobeautywithMimi

Never let any tell you you you can’t do something on your own. I had a “Best Friend” who told me I could not make it on my own cause I didn’t have a car. And then proceeded to curse at me in front of my child. She would undermine me disciplining her and would interfere with it. I let her do it but it became excessive. She started treating her different and the would s***k her. I will never let anyone s***k my daughter. I need to speak up for her and I did not. Especially knowing I was a victim of child abuse. I was stupid and didn’t know how to stick up for myself or for my daughter. She would make statements like “if I can’t s***k your child don’t let me watch them, or they can’t come here if I can’t s***k them. Which fine that is how you want to raise kids that’s fine but I was abused and I don’t think that was appropriate to s***k a child of an abused victim. No one has the right to tell you how to raise your child. As long as you are not harming them. Would get upset at any happiness my daughter showed towards her dad and would tell her to stop. She would drive crazy and we would almost get into crashes and would go into road rage mode scream and curse as if it was the other drivers fault, even with my daughter in the car. Most of the time it was her fault. She started to show her true colors and ended up judging the town I lived in. Including putting them down. I live in a small town with manufactured homes. Some are a mess and some are very well maintained. I’ve come to know my neighbors and my community and love their houses and their love for this community. Said this is where you come when you don’t have a life. She said if you live paycheck to paycheck you must not be doing anything right. I started to dig deep into our past friendship and started to remember all the little things and how she spoke about other women. We had an amazing friend who was having mental issues of her own and we both discarded her. I owned up to it and reached out to that friend who explained how that affected in a big way. I felt like s**t. They I let someone influence how I reacted to others. I seen how I was starting to pick up her habits of judging people and how she poke to people. After that friendship others were happy that I left that friendship. I seen that she is not the “good friend or person” she says she is. She wanted to w**d me out but I removed myself from everywhere that she was in as well right after she text. Tell Daisy I said happy birthday. She WAS her Godmother but didn’t want to call and tell her that. My daughter was devastated so explaining to her that we won’t be seeing her anymore made her cry. That hurt me. But the one affected the most is my daughter. I have been working on healing from years of Generational Trauma Abuse. So this was a big impact for both myself and my daughter. It is still an issue for her but she is coming to terms with it. I will never let anyone speak to me like that in front of my child the way she did. She put me down and did not care. Remember no one has the right to treat less than cause they don’t agree with something. I was at my lowest and my mental health was deteriorating and she knew this, but she kicked me lower. I don’t know if it was because I was going to be another paycheck for her or if maybe she had issues she definitely needs to resolve but I put this “woman” in a pedestal. I looked up to her for overcoming her own struggles. She changed, which people are capable of. But refused to believe others could change. I started thinking of the others that she lost friendships with, and friendships she just discarded. Yes discarded. and realized they were being treated wrong as well. I definitely was not in the right state of mind to look up to someone who rescued me. But only for their benefits. It’s sad that you start seeing all the truth and that person will never change their mind or own up to their mistakes just so they look good to everyone else. If you can’t communicate and listen to the other person what is that friendship for. Yes keep your circle small, and don’t take bulls**t from anyone, but also be kind and passionate towards people. I am definitely making sure my real friends matter. I am not going to play games and say stuff like oh I will w**d out my friends and just let them fade away. Not a real friend when you say stuff like that. Or I have no filter I call it like it is. Sorry but telling someone they can’t do it alone cause of a car ain’t calling it like it is. That’s just being a narcissist. Which that’s what it is 100%. Others survived that friendship. I hope their mental health is good. Mine isn’t and therapy is the biggest help in my life that has helped me make my decision better in order to raise a strong independent women who will be kind just because.

2024 I will become a women who will lift other women up. Especially when mental health is declining. Those “friends” are not going to care about your mental health. Remember to choose wisely who you bring in your circle. Not everyone who is helping you, will have the right intentions. But please don’t be that “friend”. Be the friend that actually is the good friend and help out of the kindness of your heart. We need to raise more women who are kind. More women who are smart. More women to communicate more. More women who will be in touch with their emotions. My daughter is the Best thing that has happened. Her feelings matter. My beautiful independent smart daughter.