LateDiagnosed: the intersectionality of autism and experiences

Another post that I’ve seen circulating around Facebook that is AI generated that people believed to be true.

Websites now are a thing that can help people figure out if an image is AI or not.

https://www.verifythis.com/ is one of them.

Feel free to share this post if you wanna help make others aware of how to tell if an image is real or not.

Pink dolphins exist, but these photos claiming to show one in North Carolina are fake Albino bottlenose dolphins that look pink have been spotted in the U.S. before. But viral photos that claim to show a pink dolphin in North Carolina aren’t real.

Beetopia - 2024 such a WIN and a step in the right direction! I hope more states follow!!

Lawns to Legumes: Your Yard Can BEE the Change | MN Board of Water, Soil Resources The Lawns to Legumes program offers a combination of workshops, coaching, planting guides and cost-share funding (individual support grants) for installing pollinator-friendly native plantings in residential lawns. The program also includes Pollinatory Pathways grants, which are pollinator programs...

I'm not perfect, far from it but I know I have a generous heart.

My healing journey means I am taking responsibility for my actions.

One thing about me, is that I never fear taking on personal accountability.

I am honest from the get go.

I am not afraid to apologize and acknowledge if I have hurt others but I do require others in my life to understand human interaction and connection is NOT a one way street.

I am authentic, raw and feel deeply passionate about all living things.

I hurt when people hurt, I hurt when animals hurt.

Some may call me "too much" "overly sensitive" "annoying" but I know myself better than anyone and everything I do for people is out of the goodness of my heart.

There is never any intention to hurt others, ever...

I am human, I hurt too.

I bleed when cut, cry when sad, get anxious when scared, talk fast when excited.

I shut down when stressed, take breaks when overloaded. I need time to process, especially when I feel slighted, judged, misunderstood or taken advantage of.

My emotions are intense, believe me I know it.

I require a lot from the people around me but I feel that I am worthy to receive the type of healthy energy and effort that I so freely give.

I can and do emotionally detach.

Sometimes I come back and other times, I'm gone for good.

My body may be here, my smile might be present, you might here my laughter but once I have emotionally detached, it is done out of protection to safe guard my heart.

Someone like me will give you the shirt off her back, wear my heart on my sleeve and do anything for you to help you feel safe, loved and valued but I realize that if I am doing that for everyone around me, who is doing those things for me?

Discovering myself, knowing myself on a deeper level than any other person in the world means I KNOW my intentions are pure.

I cannot control the way others see me.

I cannot control the communication style of others around me.

I cannot control the actions, the thoughts, the emotions, the perceptions, the twisted narratives that others have created of me in their minds.

I know myself.

I am learning to love myself.

I accept myself

I am worthy

and

I matter too.

I finally found information to help explain so much I struggle with.

OMG this explains SO much of everything for me.

Teachers would mark my paper will all sorts of red about CARELESS MISTAKES and like SLOW DOWN and I was so frustrated cause I couldn’t help it nor see my mistakes.

I like struggle with so much of these issues.

And I’m not sorry for it either.

I feel this deeply.

❤️☮️❤️✌️❤️

I WAS DIAGNOSED AT 33 WITH AUTISM
WHICH HELPED ME LEARN AND UNDERSTAND
WHY LIFE WAS SO DIFFERENT FOR ME🧠
https://sparkforautism.org/discover_article/black-mother-wife-autistic/

🤎I PAID TO BOOST THIS POST TO HELP OTHERS 🤜🤛

WHO ARE NEURODIVERGENT,
WHO ARE CONNECTED TO SOMEONE WHO IS NEURODIVERGENT,
WHO IS WONDERING IF THEY MAY BE NEURODIVERGENT and

NOT TO SELL OR MAKE PROFIT🤎

(Google docs with images and links to their respective webpages for transparency and reference https://docs.google.com/document/d/e/2PACX-1vSY8kPfVaOwKc-rdkjNpFbyQjQCHmXf18RYQNyTjkROlebbcA-4ozO58_aj55bBITdvqc7RyHgAxSC5/pub

😱PATHALOGICAL DEMAND AVOIDANCE 💨

I JUST REALIZED AFTER LEARNING ABOUT THIS
LIKE TWO YEARS AGO THIS PERMEATES
AND CONTROLS MY ENTIRE EXISTENCE.

I wanted to spread awareness on something very real but is yet to be understood enough to be diagnosed.

It is something everyone deals with- DEMAND AVOIDANCE to varying degrees but when it's pervasive it is classified as PATHOLOGICAL DEMAND AVOIDANCE and is seen as a SUBTYPE of AUTISM.

It's like the difference from dealing with depression sometimes and it being DISABLING and being considered MAJOR DEPRESSIVE DISORDER.

PATHOLOGICAL DEMAND AVOIDANCE
(aka extreme need to avoid things you NEED or are EXPECTED to do- even simple tasks and POSITIVE things)

Even my body signs of hunger, thirst, and sleep feel like BIG demands depending on how overwhelmed I am....it all makes so much sense now.

Another puzzle piece to understanding my life found and placed in trynna complete the cryptic nature of my life and who I am.

But this with my other issues explains why I wasn't able to work and went on so early when I was 24. In spite of how I APPEAR on the OUTSIDE I have so so many issues hidden that makes things so hard.

Also this explains that why even with autism I am different in ways than others who are also autistic.

First ,
then
,
then ,
then ,
then (compulsive intrusive thoughts)
and (it aint just about reading)
and realizing I was a ,
now


has so many intertwined and hidden co morbid issues man.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Uq1n8UQ3hc&t=888s
https://www.pdasociety.org.uk/wp-content/uploads/2021/05/What-is-PDA-info-sheet.pdf

https://stimpunks.org/2023/08/09/meerkat-mode-monotropic-split-and-monotropic-spiral/

https://iapmd.org/facts-and-figures

https://neuroclastic.com/is-it-trauma-or-autism-or-both/

https://www.ocduk.org/ocd/pure-o/

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yH5Ds4_0lO8&t=162s

Being a visual thinker and processor I am making a project of using my skills to map out my autism and explore it and to have a visual layout that describes how it effects and manifests in me and my life.

(Possibly making it into a book that may help others)

(deserve EMPATHY, UNDERSTANDING and not HATE)

A beautifully done painting by a friend of mine.

Unnamed so far
-April 2024

Transcript: "Black Autistic People Matter

"Shoutout to the Black autistic people who are even bigger danger of police brutality than other Black people due to the intersection of ableism and racism.

"Shoutout to the Black autistic people, who lash out when touched, who run away from loud sounds, who are non-verbal, who have body language and stims that could be considered odd or threatening.

"Shoutout to the Black autistic people who act, express themselves, and react in ways that are considered socially inappropriate and who are in danger because of it.

"May you all be safe. Your lives matter."

What is autism? How the term became too broad to have meaning any more | Tom Clements The fashion for celebrating ‘neurodiversity’ ignores those with debilitating severe autism, says autism self-advocate and author Tom Clements

I am going back to coaching and offering support to coaches and service providers. I will be offering support services to a limited number of advocates and caregivers who either know my work, reach out to connect with me privately, or are referred to me and I will be making sure that we are an aligned fit before I agree that we should work together in any capacity.
While validation is important, it becomes something else when it is manipulated and taken from others in ways that are unethical and not mutually beneficial in peer-to-peer spaces. Bullying and tearing people down to make a point, traumatizing people because "no one owes them" is not the kind of mentality or behavior that I can be around as much as I am. The comment sections read like "We will support only some of you, the ones who agree with us and do as we want them to do. If not, you do not belong here with us."
Disagreeing doesn't always mean arguing. Forcing people to fall in and exclude people with disabilities that are more severe, nuanced, or complex is that really inclusion? It leaves me and many others, on the outside. In addition, there are disparities and unique cultural and historical needs that are not recognized within disability discourse, let alone be discussed and examined, because so much comes from white folks. Further compounding things for others in ways I am not qualified to speak on, in ways I cannot imagine or understand, but are very much real, and I need to point that out.
Do you know why I decided to be an advocate? I watched my mom fight for me and wanted to follow in her footsteps. Yes, I am very lucky to have her as others do not have family, parents or people in their lives who will fight for them. But also, because as a young kid I spent a lot of time in a hospital setting. In waiting rooms, I sat with kids who had different types of disabilities. Many of them had more severe cases than mine. I also sat with their parents. I realized that I was different somehow and at the time, I didn't have words for my feelings. I wasn't around other disabled kids outside of a medical setting. Then one day, after getting some looks from a mom in the waiting room for one of my appointments, my mom could tell I was feeling some kind of way about it, and we talked about it on the way home about the privilege I have and what that meant in that context.
Diversity, equity and inclusion cannot exist without diversity, equity, and inclusion. The word severe is not bad if it tells someone's truth, including to the point of getting services approved and rendered. To argue that severe, profound, and complex do not exist is a form of lateral ableism and a privilege in and of itself.
I encourage self-check-ins doing this work. I encourage doing your own inner work rather than only professing it. If one is bold enough to be discussing things like "aspie supremacy" (a term that I do not personally get behind because of stigma and discrimination) please take a vibe check once in a while, because superiority is not far behind.
Does the system need to change? Yes. Do we still need some of the language that people don't like? Yes, I do, and others like me do, too, but that doesn't mean we like it all, either. Would many of us still be disabled regardless of whether or not society suddenly woke up and accommodated us? Yes. That means the social model as the model still leaves folks out.
Imagine if one day, everything that everyone didn't like did not exist anymore. The world would be a dark and lonely place. People and things as we know them and love them, could disappear. Maybe we all would because the world is carrying a lot of anger. You never know what could happen in your future or the future of those you care about, and should that day come, you might be surprised at how much the things or people you hated on, didn't like or didn't want, suddenly became things and people that you had to depend on, whether you wanted to or not.
Representation matters. The voices, needs, and truths of others, matter too. Beyond the internet. Inclusion should be inclusion. Not selectively applied by self-advocates who are quick to boot anyone away or belittle and get snarky with, just for existing in a way that they don't experience or believe is real. If I knew at 17 what I know now, I don't think I would have believed it would be this way today.
Manipulating people and altering facts and information for validation, comments, likes and views is unethical. Especially if one is taking money from others or offering paid services. One day peer support and advocacy may be as regulated as it is under state contracts.
One day, the influencers treating other disabled folks and their families and loved ones like dirt who do not care if they traumatize people and jeopardize their mental health and well-being will no longer be able to get away with what they are doing. They will no longer be able to profit in the ways that they have, especially not from cruelty and lateral ableism. I know that day may not come in my lifetime, but if this kind of "advocacy" does not change, nothing has really changed at all.
If you made it this far and still want to be connected, thank you. I appreciate and value the fact that you let me speak from my heart and still want to be connected. This was hard to write but I had to get it out so that I can move on from here.
If you made it this far and do not wish to be connected anymore, thank you for being here for as long as you were. I am sorry that we had to part ways, but I respect that you are choosing to do what is best for you.
ID: Black text in a white box that reads "If in your revolution you utilize your oppressor's ways, methods, language, spaces, habits, and measurements, you will not have a revolution. You will have a repetition. Of oppression. Many people are comfortable inside an oppressive way of life. They feel it suits and serves them. These people will resist you. Do not assume they believe anything is wrong at all. They may say they want revolution but insist that you use the oppressor's old ways. Ensure you are moving into new light together, not finding false light inside old shade. Jaiya John Freedom: Medicine Words for Your Brave Revolution'"

How can the “autistic community” push for and when we not all autistics are accepted if they don’t share the same opinions as “the autism community.”

More of what autistic people need: connection and support to connect to others

Something that hasn't prepared me for adulthood or "down" time is the fact that if autistic people don't have enough activities to fill the void of the day or if they are to themselves for an extended period of time, they likely need and sometimes want to connect with others.

Many times we as autistic people are known as loners because we are diverse thinkers. We see the world differently than others. Likewise, we as spectrumfolk are going to see and connect with others differently.

The truth is whenever we are left to ourselves, we are left to our own thoughts and they can get really dark if they are left to be.. Being able to connect and relate with others, Neurodivergent or Neurological is very beneficial once skills and boundaries are taught and applied in life.

Of course as autistics we all communicate differently and that's perfectly acceptable, but what needs to happen is the fact of having natural supports that individuals can rely on other than family members so that they can have a different relationship than that which is only on one parable.

As a community we need autistic peers who can go between connecting individuals in not only the communities of which individuals live but also in the expansive space that they wish. There's been so many technological advancements in the past decades and even the past few years that's even helped me greatly have connections with others locally, Neurodivergent and neurotypical that allows me to learn, grow and fulfill my life.

We need platforms that teaches the basics of connecting to others online in the way that they want to safely, possibly written by autistic people and other related curriculum as it relates to understanding and making connections with others in a safe manner.

It is realizing that family is not always going to be here in the manner it is nor could it entertain in the way that I wanted and I've had to do the hard work to build my friend network to what it is today after many years of being socially isolated and finally breaking the barriers that held me from communicating in the way that I do now.

I deeply appreciate my connections in the way that they are and I wish that my autistic peers are able to connect with those natural supports that they wish to in a healthy and safe manner. It is something that neurotypical people often take for granted and for us as autistic people it is something that's challenging but if there's a desire, with the right support, it can happen.

We must do better than program based relationships and friendships. We must work with autistic people to help them in being able to connect to others in the ways that work for them and build better connections.

Monetization is something which has turned the internet into a hub of intentionally misleading clickbait that often uses sensationalism to drive clicks which drive engagement which gets them more profit.

It has made actual truth and fact driven information with hard to find by monetizing the order of search results and also hard to distinguish visually without knowing what to look for the difference between the misleading websites which may or may not be fact based that are out to make profit.

It’s entirely so sad.

Even websites by news stations have been using click bait titles to drive engagement…that drives misinformation because a lot of people don’t read the actual information within the article and go by the title.