Beth Burgmeyer, LMHC

Holding space for a client and supporting someone just by being with them have created some of the most powerful moments in therapy, especially equine assisted psychotherapy. There are moments between clients and their horses where I need to step back, be quiet, and let the power of the relationship between the horse and the client happen. The other day I was giving a demonstration on ways to facilitate rhythmic riding during therapy. This person wasn’t a client, but they experienced a powerful moment. I told the others therapists watching, “This is when I shut up and get out of the way and let the person sit in this moment for as long as they need to.” It’s natural to want to process something as soon as we see it, but “being with” and holding space often have more power than words. I would process these things later, but not in the moment.

I tell my clients that one of the first steps in their journey is just to notice things both inside and outside of themselves. Notice how their breath is in that moment. Notice if there’s tension anywhere in their body, notice any sensations in their body that accompany their emotions. It’s okay to sit in uncomfortable moments for a little while and explore those moments with gentle curiosity instead of judgement. It’s hard to change anything until we take the time to really step into it. The same goes for moments of peace and comfort. Sit in those moments and truly experience them.

Getting training from the The Natural Lifemanship Institute has been life-changing, both personally and professionally. Their trauma informed and relationship-based approach to therapy offers hope to so many people, especially those with complex trauma. I feel blessed every day that I get to do this work with my clients, with my therapy partner, and with our incredible equine partners.

This is one of the many things horses can teach us during therapy sessions.

Love, acceptance, and connection are healing.

Letting go can be scary.

This is important, but so so hard to do. it’s so difficult to sit in discomfort, but noticing those uncomfortable sensations and feelings leads to awareness. That awareness keeps you in the present moment instead of being thrust back into any past trauma. If you can stay grounded and present as you sit with discomfort and pain, you can begin to move through it.

The triggers don’t go away and the trauma doesn’t go away, but with trauma informed therapy, the trauma and triggers don’t have to hijack your life anymore.

“Rupture and repair” is a powerful concept. When we’re in relationships we all say and do things we wish we hadn’t (the rupture). The healing happens in the do over (the repair). I practice this with my clients in the therapeutic relationship too.

This can be such a hard, but important concept, especially for people who are working through trauma. Noticing that dualities do exists is the first key. Let clients notice that both things can exist and both things can be true. Then ask them to notice where they feel these things in their bodies. It can be freeing to notice and experience that both things can be true. One of my favorite dualities that is not on this list is:
You can be stuck AND you can move.

Working through trauma is hard, especially if you have complex trauma. I remind my clients that even if they’re crawling, they’re moving forward.

One of the hardest concepts in the Natural Lifemanship model of therapy is “connected detachment.” Connected detachment is being able to maintain a sense of closeness and connection when you’re apart from someone. A client’s relationship with their therapy horse is a great way to explore this concept. Horses and humans often struggle with the connected detachment piece, and it can be a great avenue into exploring the dynamics in other relationships. Many children have a very hard time with connected detachment. Here are some great tools for helping children maintain a sense of connection even when they’re apart from their caregivers.

I can’t take away someone’s pain, but I can walk through it with them.

I had a fantastic experience at the The Natural Lifemanship Intensive Practicum training I attended last weekend. I was blessed to have my therapy partner (equine professional) Nita Chaplin with me. We worked with a horse named Boomer, who we both fell in love with.

I continue to learn so much about this incredible therapy model as I work toward advanced certification.

This is the space I strive to create for my clients in my therapy sessions. Being in relationship with the horses, being in nature, and being connected with a compassionate therapy team leads to creating a “Brave Space.”

AN INVITATION TO A BRAVE SPACE
by Micky Scottbey Jones

Together we will create brave space
Because there is no such thing as a “safe space”
We exist in the real world
We all carry scars and we have all caused wounds.
In this space
We seek to turn down the volume of the outside world.
We amplify voices that fight to be heard elsewhere,
We call each other to more truth and love
We have the right to start somewhere and continue to grow. We have the responsibility to examine what we think we know. We will not be perfect.
It will not always be what we wish it to be
But
It will be our brave space together,
And
We will work on it side by side.

When dealing with trauma, people often hear the words, “Just let go of your past.” But trauma is so complex it literally changes your brain. Through the Natural Lifemanship model of equine therapy, we can help people change their brains and build new healthy neuronal pathways. When we can help people learn to regulate and integrate all parts of the brain, it’s remarkable how much it helps people who have experienced trauma. Horses help clients with this by giving honest feedback and by building connected relationships with clients.

I’m passionate about helping individuals who are struggling with depression, anxiety, trauma, or stressful life changes. It takes courage to ask for help, and it’s a privilege to walk beside you on your journey toward healing, peace, and balance in your life. As a client-centered therapist, I will partner with you and provide a safe, judgment-free space for you to tell your story. Every person deserves to be heard and understood.

No single approach is the right one for every person, so I have been trained in a range of modalities. In my twelve years of experience, I’ve worked with children, adolescents, and adults. My primary specialty and focus is EAP (Equine Assisted Psychotherapy) and TF-EAP (Trauma Focused Equine Assisted Therapy). Horses have so much to teach us about relationships, true connection, and mindfulness. It is through connected relationships and brain integration/regulation that so many people find healing with these incredible horses.

I invite you to reach out to me to see if my services would be a good fit for you. I’m located in Indianola, Iowa. If you’d like to take the next step, call or email me to set up a free fifteen-minute consultation.