Willed To Win

Unexpected pain, devastating trials, brutal hardship, gut wrenching suffering, excruciating losses, extended challenges, prolonged grief, unimaginable injustice, unrelenting turmoil, extreme life altering obstacles, blindsiding discomfort, and paralyzing trauma, are ALL guaranteed in this life. However, MISERY.... IS....COMPLETELY, OPTIONAL!
-Mark Narveson, Willedtowin

❤️RELATIONSHIP BASICS: 50(x2) Ways to Keep Your Love(r) ❤️

1. Have excellent Communication- timely, respectful, effective, calm, and consistent. (Clearly express your needs)
2. Prioritize your relationship.
3. Practice Intentional listening and defenseless hearing.
4. Make mutual Passion and selfless intimacy, regularly.
5. ENGAGE in Shared interests.
6. BE HONEST.... ALWAYS.
7. Put PRIDE ASIDE.
8. Have Financial unity. Be responsible.
9. Share daily tasks.
10. Treasure, Honor, Respect, Adore each other, regardless of your feelings.
11. Make Faith and your Spouse your PRIORITY (family and everything else, secondary)
12. Stay Humble and Grateful for each other.
13. Ensure a SAFE ( physical, psychological emotional, spiritual) ENVIRONMENT.
14. Pursue each other, EXCLUSIVELY!
15. Commit to dating, regularly.
16. Address disunity ASAP.
17. Accept each other's families.
18. Always BELIEVE you are ON THE SAME TEAM! Have faith in each other!
19. Be a person of integrity, compassion, empathy, and generosity.
20. FORGIVENESS is imperative and is not optional. (This does NOT mean, remaining in abusive situations)
21. Relieve stress, not cause it.
22. STAY SEXY!
23. Recognize, admit, address, overcome, and defeat Addiction.
24. Say and receive: "I'm very sorry, I forgive you, I love you unconditionally!"
25. Remove ALL temptation sources!
26. Pray and study scripture together, regularly.
27. Recognize that the Enemy is trying to destroy your unity and purpose.
28. Own YOUR PART of your past, present and future.
29. Maintain a servant heart.
30. Refrain from vulgarity and sarcasm.
31. Allow one another to grieve, change and evolve.
32. Compromise in disagreement.
33. Grow together, not apart.
34. Take care of your health- physically nutritionally, emotionally, spiritually.
35. Re-create, Re-invent your relationship.
36. Speak your spouses love languages.
37. Support each other when parenting.
38. Take vacations together.
39. Laugh together. Find appropriate humor in everything, with time.
40. Refuse to become bitter, resigned resentful, or cynical.
41. Recognize that CONTROL of each other, is destructive and based in insecurity.
42. Eliminate all forms of po*******hy.
43. Remember life is very, very short.
44. Let go of your "rights".
45. Be best Friends, Never Roommates.
46. Practice patience every day.
47. Never keep score.
48. Practice Self-Control.
49. Sacrifice without reason.
50. GO TO A BIBLE BASED CHURCH TOGETHER, and hold hands.
51. CHOOSE EACH OTHER, DAILY.
52. Inspire each other! Live in what's possible!
53. Be full of MERCY, GRACE AND UNCONDITIONAL LOVE.
54. Make choices that honor your partner, and choices that build TRUST.
55. Be playful.
56. Remember your partner is your teammate, not your enemy.
57. Obligatory anything, is gross.
58. Appreciate each other verbally, DAILY!
59. Persevere through hardship.
60. Look forward! Dwell on what's going right.
61. Always be authentic and keep it real.
62. Recognize that Manipulation is never healthy.
63. Limit criticism.
64. Process and display Anger in healthy ways.
65. Be a protector of your relationship.
66. Write each other love notes.
67. Embrace the journey!
68. Heal the hurts.
69. Cherish one another, every day.
70. Feed your Holy Spirits.
71. Be spontaneous!
72. Be open to constructive feedback.
73. Be flexible.
74. Be direct.
75. Be soft and gentle.
76. BE ATTRACTIVE.
77. Notice each other.
78. Enthusiastically uplift one another.
79. Do Not make excuses.
80. Never use the children.
81. Just be....really, really sweet.
82. Your relationship should never be a chore.
83. Hope always.
84. Rest when needed.
85. Pray continually for your spouse, and children.
86. Admit when you're hurt.
87. Never be afraid to ask, for help.
88. Make every day an adventure.
89. Be excited!
90. Encourage one another as often as possible.
91. Be resilient.
92. Endure loss.
93. Fight through trials.
94. Remain committed, loyal, and faithful.
95. Be a refuge for each other.
96. Love with liberation.
97. Explore together.
98. Keep your promises.
99. Separate emotions, from the person.
100. Expect miracles!

©️ willedtowin

The most delicate and powerful thing, in any relationship, is TRUST
-mark narveson

The Anatomy of an Apology-
©️ Willedtowin

1. Identifying and acknowledging that I was offensive in my words or actions, or both. (Reflection- What did I say or do) [Awareness]

2. Authentic feeling of remorse and or regret. (I own my words and actions) [Responsibility]

3. Sincerely apologizing to the person or persons who were the object(s)of my aggression and offense. (I'm sorry...)[Accountability]

4. Seeking and asking for forgiveness
(Please forgive me...) [Vulnerability]

5. Asking God to change my heart and show me my blind spots (Introspection - Search me, Oh, God). [Refinement]

6. Changing future behaviors, so as to not repeat the offense. (Possibility)

7. Forgiving oneself (Humility)

8. Restoring the relationship with a visible and consistent, positive and inspiring change in Behavior. (Healing and inspiration)

The Power of INVITATION..........(You are invited to read this post to its end :) )

INVITATION is a very powerful and generous word and concept. It comes from a giver, and from a deeply Love filled person. INVITATION is open and intriguing. It is sacrificial. It is energizing and full of possibilities. It is sweet, thoughtful, and inspiring. It is courageous and rooted in humility. And if authentic, an INVITATION could even be life changing.

There are basically 4 Responses, or a close variation to an Invitation:

1. YESSSS! Omgoodness...! I'd LOVE TO! Sounds AMAZING and I cant wait!! How EXCITING!! THHHAAAAANNK YOU!!!!
2. Hmmm..I'm not sure. Thanks for the invite. Can I get back to you?
3. I'm sorry, I have to decline, but thank you for thinking of me!!
4. .................No Response at all.......Invitaton Ignored.........

Check this out: I INVITE YOU....to imagine how you might feel at the response of each, being the INVITOR and INVITEE.

Lastly, and most importantly:
Did you know, that WE...are given the ULTIMATE INVITATION from our Creator, Almighty God? An invitation to His banquet table and to be His child, His precious son or daughter? This invitation comes through the free gift of Jesus. What is your response to this ULTIMATE INVITATION?

©️willedtowin

We LISTEN and we HEAR through several different FILTERS:
Listening IS NOT THE SAME as hearing. The following lists are The filters, through which we hear and listen:
Through:
1. Our fears and insecurities
2. Our self confidence
3. Our pain and scars and walls
4. Our victories
5. Our perception of God's view of us.
6. Our perception of others' views of us.
We hear and listen:
7. Defensively; or offensively
8. Judgmentally; or compassionately
9. Intentionally/Attentively; or passively
10. From love and trust; or from doubt, mistrust and fear.
11. With open possibility and hope; or despairing defeat
12. Receptively; or rejectfully
13. With awareness; or with an agenda
14. Being present; or to fix/solve
15. With Open minded unbiased pretense; or preconceived stories/ unfair judgments about the person's experiences.

Our life experiences along with our experiences with people and relationships, give us filters.
© willedtowin 2022

God speaks to us in 10 distinct ways. 1)His Word-the Bible, 2) His Holy Spirit -prompting, 3) His people, 4) His Creation -Beauty of nature, 5) His Provisions -meeting our daily needs, 6) His Protection, 7) His Correction, 8) His Miracles, 9) Spirit inspired music and arts, and 10) Answered and Unanswered prayer. ©️WilledToWin

---Happy(ness) vs Joy---
The following summary details the primary distinctions between Happiness and Godly Joy.

Happiness is always:
1.DEPENDENT-upon some-body, some-thing, some-place, some circumstance, some situation or some experience AND
2. is always TEMPORARY
3. HAPPINESS is always a fleeting emotion.
4. Self Focused
5. Deserving and expecting
6. Pride Based
7. External

Joy is always--
1.INDEPENDENT of any person, place, thing, location, or experience, and, it is ALWAYS
2.EVERLASTING, permanent, unwavering, and eternal.
3. Joy is always a deep, convicted sense, with a consistent attitude of gratitude.
4. Others focused
5. Unexpected and undeserving
6. Humbled
7. Internal
Copyright Willedtowin.com 2021

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The Anatomy of an Apology- copyright Willedtowin.com 2021

1. Identifying and acknowledging that I was offensive in my words or actions, or both. (Reflection)

2. Authentic feeling of remorse and or regret. (Responsibility)

3. Sincerely apologizing to the person or persons who were the object of my aggression and offense. (I'm sorry...)[Accountability]

4. Seeking and asking for forgiveness
(Please forgive me...) [Vulnerability]

5. Asking God to change my heart and show me my blind spots. (Refinement)

6. Changing future behaviors, so as to not repeat the offense. (Possibility)

7. Forgiving oneself (Humility)

8. Restoring the relationship with a visible and consistent, positive and inspiring change in Behavior. (Healing and inspiration)

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