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When the Spirit calls, answer.

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Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas, friends. Immanuel is here.

All this took place to fulfill what the Lord had said through the prophet: “The virgin will conceive and give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel” (which means “God with us”). Matthew 1:22-23

Immanuel.

The wait is over. The moment has arrived. The world has changed. The world is changed.

The crying, pooping, tiny, vulnerable baby Jesus is here. Wrapped in cloth, placed in a manger previously used by donkeys and goats and camels.

Even in this humble beginning, we can shout, “God is with us.” Maybe especially in this humble beginning.

Today is a busy day. But just take a moment. Literally, if all you have is one minute, that’s fine. Just take a moment and reflect on this simple but profound truth: God is with us.

Now follow this short exercise. Read the phrase four times. Each time, emphasize a different word as I’ve indicated in bold.

God is with us.

God is with us.

God is with us.

God is with us.

And finally,

God is with us.

Immanuel.

Roy Goble

Day 28: Water Breaking Day

It was tempting to call today “Water Breaking Day” or “Contraction Day” because the baby is most definitely on the way. Somehow I doubt that church liturgical calendars are going to adopt those titles, but if they do, you heard it here first.

Some of you have had babies. You know much better than I do what it’s like at this moment. I was there for the birth of our two children (apart from a small lapse where I fell asleep on the couch at 2am), but I am far from an expert on this topic.

Still, I know this moment is what Mary and Joseph have been longing for and fearing at the same time. It’s a frightening, exhilarating, hopeful, confounding time. This complexity had to be even more pronounced for a teenage mom in a patriarchal society without her family around. Nothing against Joseph here, but it’s hard to imagine him being much help when things got real. (I wasn’t, and that was after a half-dozen classes on how to help!)

So in this moment of holy revelation, we hear a teenager cry out in pain, afraid, but ever so alive and filled with joy. Her cries are prayers asking for God’s help. I almost wrote “God’s presence” but, well, that’s exactly the point. God is present.

I do wonder if there were some humorous moments. Maybe Mary’s face is contorted in pain as she shouts at Joseph, “You are never touching me again!”

To which he meekly responds, “But honey—I never did touch you!”

Probably not what happened. But it makes me smile. And it makes the whole thing so … human.
Roy Goble is the co-founder and CEO of PathLight International. And yeah, you really should click that link because they do awesome stuff. He is also an author, runs a real estate investment company in Silicon Valley (don’t hate him for it), and is a follower of Jesus in his own weird, honest, confused way. He is easily bribed with good wine, pictures of golden retrievers, and dad jokes. Roy has been married to his high school sweetheart for over forty years, and they have two adult children who are doing amazing stuff.

Day 27: The Ackward In-Between

Today has always felt like the awkward in-between. We aren’t quite to Christmas yet, or even Christmas Eve, but at the same time it almost feels like Advent—and the waiting—is over. So we make up silly greetings like “Merry Christmas Eve Eve!” It’s a strange day.

For Mary and Joseph, the wait must have been incredibly awkward. They didn’t even have Advent Calendars filled with waxy chocolate to tell them exactly when the big day was coming! Their future was entirely unknown. It was close—they knew that by the shape of Mary’s belly—but it was still murky.

It must be like that for everyone who doesn’t have the power to control their destiny. Whether poor, sick, lost, struggling with addictions, too young, too old, or just down on their luck, there are millions (billions?) of people without the resources to shape their futures. For people like this, every day is awkward.

This is one of the reasons I co-founded PathLight. Education is a great equalizer, and it gives people a bit more control over their future.

Think about Mary and Joseph. This whole Advent story displays how they’ve been pushed and pulled by forces beyond their control. Surprise, you’re pregnant! Surprise, your fiancé is pregnant! Surprise, the child is the savior of the world! Surprise, you have to go to Bethlehem! Surprise, there are no rooms available! It goes on and on.

Maybe today, our Christmas Eve Eve, is a day to accept some of those forces outside our control. That doesn’t mean we’re entirely powerless. But maybe we can tell that little voice inside ourselves to take a hike … you know, the one that’s always whispering things like, This is awkward, and I don’t like it!

Sometimes awkward is okay. Sometimes awkward is exactly the place we need to be in.
Speaking of awkward transitions … as you know, this Christmas I’m helping PathLight get at-risk kids into high school. And I’d love your help!
Please click here and consider a gift.

Day 26: Hurry Up and Wait!

Is waiting a spiritual discipline? I don’t remember hearing it referred to that way, but it probably should be. I suppose the closest spiritual discipline is patience.

The poor are very, very good at this discipline. After years of waiting—for a lucky break, a touch of compassion, a stable job—their spirituality of waiting is well-practiced.

But the rest of us, living in the developed world? Most of us are terrible at waiting. We shift lanes on the freeway to be a few seconds ahead, we scout the checkout line to estimate the wait, and we stare at our phones when we have no other way to pass the time. If waiting is a spiritual discipline, we suck at it.

But sometimes we have no choice but to wait, and that can be a marvelous experience.

Advent is about living in expectation. It’s about waiting. And on this day, some 2000 years ago, Mary and Joseph sat in a dusty stable, waiting for several things.

Maybe for a room to open up in the Inn.

Maybe for a census bureaucrat to finalize registration so they could head home.

Definitely for the baby to arrive.

And possibly, if they could dream this big, to usher in an entirely new era through the birth of God’s son.

In these waiting moments, the couple talk. They dream. They stargaze, and maybe they see something new in the night sky: a bright star they’d never noticed before.

Something is about to happen. Something beyond their minds’ ability to understand. But not beyond their hearts’ ability to sense.

They wait.

Roy Goble is the co-founder and CEO of PathLight International. And yeah, you really should click that link because they do awesome stuff. He is also an author, runs a real estate investment company in Silicon Valley (don’t hate him for it), and is a follower of Jesus in his own weird, honest, confused way. He is easily bribed with good wine, pictures of golden retrievers, and dad jokes. Roy has been married to his high school sweetheart for over forty years, and they have two adult children who are doing amazing stuff.

Day 25: Silent Night It Ain't

The perfect Hallmark Christmas scene is set.

The manger filled with fresh straw, the sheep and goats obediently kneeling nearby, the camels in the background stoically chewing their cuds, the teenage mother-to-be looking dreamy and content, and her confident man doing everything possible to make her comfortable.

Um … no.

My family moved to a small ranch when I was twelve, so I’ve seen this supposedly “serene” setting in barns and corrals and stables. The sheep make a racket, the goats butt heads, the camels pass gas (we had cows, so close enough), and every stable hosts mice, rats, fleas, ticks, spiders, and who knows what else.

Plus everything is pooping and peeing, 24/7.

This was a junkyard without the wrecked cars. It was messy, active, noisy, and smelly.

And I’m not picking on Hallmark. All our Christmas images and stories make the whole thing seem so sterile and clean, when it was anything but.

The teenage mother-to-be? Undoubtedly terrified, uncomfortable, and nervous. Her strong and confident partner? Likewise! They were just like every other expectant couple.

In our search for a Silent Night vibe, we often overemphasize peace and quiet. It’s a great song, but it’s an unobtainable idealism. I’m sure there were moments of tranquility, but they had to have been brief moments surrounded by chaos.

This story is about real people in a difficult situation. So let’s not romanticize it. Let’s embrace their grittiness, and let’s honor them for dealing with the sheer madness of it all.
Roy Goble is the co-founder and CEO of PathLight International. And yeah, you really should click that link because they do awesome stuff. He is also an author, runs a real estate investment company in Silicon Valley (don’t hate him for it), and is a follower of Jesus in his own weird, honest, confused way. He is easily bribed with good wine, pictures of golden retrievers, and dad jokes. Roy has been married to his high school sweetheart for over forty years, and they have two adult children who are doing amazing stuff.

Day 24: We Could Use Some Lysol.

Having dug deep for the strength to continue, Mary and Joseph get a small break. Remember the scene from yesterday? Mary and Joseph on the side of the road, frustrated and fearful, with no place to stay and people passing without really looking at them.

Then, to their surprise, someone walks up and asks, “Are you the couple looking for a room?”

Now I don’t know who plays that part: man or woman, innkeeper or local farmer, friendly local or an angelic-being disguised as one.

And I don’t even know if they were sitting on the side of the road or were knocking on every door.

But at some point, someone made the offer. “Look, it’s not much, but you’re welcome to stay in our stable.”

God bless that person. It was a small act of generosity—and even the smallest acts can make a huge, sometimes unanticipated difference.

What’s odd is that we tend to think of this moment as a letdown. They wanted a room at the Inn, but they were forced to stay in a lowly stable. But think about it: Mary and Joseph had to be thrilled.

Sure, there was the “have a baby in a stable” shocker. But I think it was, by this time in their journey, a welcome bit of news. Mary and Joseph had zero options, but now they were being offered something, however modest.

Of course, I’m sure they were none too pleased about the mice, the dust, or the darkness (since most stables were actually caves). Not to mention the smell of … well, let’s just say they could use Lysol. And a pooper scooper.

But it was something. It was a start. And their donkey was especially happy.

Roy Goble is the co-founder and CEO of PathLight International. And yeah, you really should click that link because they do awesome stuff. He is also an author, runs a real estate investment company in Silicon Valley (don’t hate him for it), and is a follower of Jesus in his own weird, honest, confused way. He is easily bribed with good wine, pictures of golden retrievers, and dad jokes. Roy has been married to his high school sweetheart for over forty years, and they have two adult children who are doing amazing stuff.

Day 23: Can't We Just Go Home?

We’ve sort of danced around this because we know how the story turns out, but at some point, the pressure on Joseph and Mary to find a room must have become crushing.

Imagine the scene.

Mary, the pregnant teenager, and Joseph, the worried traveler and expectant father, sitting together by a dusty road. Worry, fatigue, frustration, fear, and hopelessness marking their faces. Their donkey munching grass under a tree. The people walking by, barely glancing at the expecting couple. In fact, people probably didn’t want to glance, just as we often walk past the homeless without wanting to make eye contact.

It’s reasonable to assume that Mary would be overwhelmed and cry a bit. Joseph might have too. They have no idea what to do or what to say. And at some point, both of them probably thought, “Why us, Lord? Why us?”

We’ve all had similar moments. And sometimes, all we can think about is finding an escape. I could see one of them saying out loud, “Why us? Why do we have to parent this child? Why do we have to be in Bethlehem right now? Why can’t we find a room?”

It’s in these moments when we can get a little crazy. More than once I’ve wanted to say, “You know what? Screw it. Let’s forget our responsibilities and go to the beach. I’m done with this.”

My personality is such that I rarely actually act on that impulse. But I think it, just like everyone does.

Mary and Joseph, as exceptional as they were, had to have the same thoughts. Can’t we just go back home? Can’t we walk over those hills to the beach for a bit? And where’s the damn ice cream I’ve been wanting for days?

Advent is about waiting in expectation. But sometimes we want the waiting to end! Sometimes we can’t bear to wait any longer. Sometimes we say, “Why us? I’m outta here.”

But it’s in these moments—when we’re tempted to toss out the script, rip up the plan, and go our own way—it’s in these moments we need to stand up and say, “No, I’m seeing this through to the end.”

What Mary and Joseph thought, believed, and felt wasn’t nearly as important as what they did. They saw things through.

Hey, a quick P.S. story to share. Years ago, I was walking through a village in Belize and met an amazing woman named Miss Lilly. Her heart was huge for anyone going without. (If Miss Lilly had been in Bethlehem 2000 years ago, you can bet Mary wouldn’t have been in the stable!) One day Miss Lilly approached a PathLight staffer and asked if one of the boys she had “adopted” could get a sponsorship. He could, he did, and his life was changed. He actually works for us now! As you think about charitable giving this Christmas, I hope you’ll join me in helping students get the gift of education through PathLight!

Day 22: Checking Airbnb

No room in the inn. Joe is frantically checking the Airbnb app and calling every one-star dive he can find, but there’s nothing available.

“Oh look,” Mary exclaims, “this place looks nice, and it gets 4.5 stars on VRBO. Let’s go look.” Joe is desperate enough to try something way out of their price range, but it’s not available either.

Hope, disappointment, hope, then more disappointment.

It must have been wildly frustrating. Their baby will arrive soon. The baby, as Mary and Joseph know. But to everyone in Bethlehem they interacted with, they were just another poor couple amongst a sea of travelers.

Years ago, my family and I were returning home from Belize. When one of our flights was delayed and we missed our connection, the airline gave us vouchers for a hotel, which was packed with other delayed travelers just like us. When I finally reached the front of the long line, I showed our vouchers and asked if they could please get us into rooms soon. The professional woman said of course, and she was happy to help.

Except then I watched as one guest and then another, and then another was checked into rooms as we stood idly by.

I snapped. “What the hell?” I bellowed, “Are you going to give us a room or not?”

The poor woman was shocked and fumbled for words before saying, “I’m so sorry, I thought my colleague was helping you!” Her colleague looked up and said, “I thought you were helping them!” We were in our room within five minutes.

Now, if I reacted that way on a family trip—and to be clear, I overreacted—imagine how Joseph might’ve responded to an innkeeper. “I have a pregnant wife! Nine months pregnant, by the way. Oh, and did I mention she is bearing the child of God who will be our King and Messiah! Wait, don’t you dare ignore me! King and Messiah, I said!”

And yet, I’m sure he didn’t say that. How could he? Nobody would believe him, for starters. He might not even believe it himself yet. Plus, announcing the importance of his unborn child would draw unwelcome attention. It’s never a great idea to announce your child is King while under foreign rule.

So Mary and Joseph remained in limbo. Looking for hope, but discovering disappointment, over and over. I’m sure it wore on them. It would wear on anyone. Visit any poor community and you’ll find people who are just plain worn out.

But for Mary and Joseph—and perhaps especially for Joseph—this frustration offered an opportunity to grow in self-control, and that too, oddly, is part of the gift of Advent.
Roy Goble is the co-founder and CEO of PathLight International. And yeah, you really should click that link because they do awesome stuff. He is also an author, runs a real estate investment company in Silicon Valley (don’t hate him for it), and is a follower of Jesus in his own weird, honest, confused way. He is easily bribed with good wine, pictures of golden retrievers, and dad jokes. Roy has been married to his high school sweetheart for over forty years, and they have two adult children who are doing amazing stuff. If you missed an earlier devotion,

Day 21: What Do You Mean You Didn't Make the Reservations?!

Imagine traveling with someone—a spouse, a friend, a sibling, anyone really—and after a long and complicated journey you arrive at your destination: a small, beautiful town surrounded by pastures of grazing sheep. Smiles all around. We’ve made it! Time for high fives and maybe a trip to the hotel bar.

Except your traveling companion forgot to make hotel reservations. Oops. And like a lot of small towns, there aren’t many options.

Oh, and did I mention that one of you is pregnant? Yeah, due any day now—and kinda pi**ed off about the journey in general. This is where we cue a Marge and Homer Simpson fight … it’s that predictable.

In our story, we can’t expect Joseph to have surfed Bethlehemhotelsdotcom and reserved the deluxe room with a view of the pool (and free breakfast). But still, couldn’t something have been done? I mean, seriously, Mary was nine months pregnant for God’s sake—literally!

Look, I know it likely wasn’t all Joe’s fault. But when you’re tired, disappointed, and probably frightened, does it really matter whose fault it is? Those are ingredients for some fireworks. And poor Joe probably felt terrible about the situation.

A few years ago we traveled to Belize with another family. The plan was for me to reserve our rooms for the first half of the trip, and the other dad would reserve for the second half. Well, my half went well, and we stayed at a place where the kids could play. But the second half? Um, it wasn’t a stable, but it felt close. I won’t forget when the guy at the front desk answered our complaint about there being no water with, “It happens.”

(Did you know that around three-quarters of all travel arrangements are made by women? Now you know why.)

Back to the story. Our couple eventually arrives in Bethlehem. But have they really arrived if they have no place to stop and rest?

Advent can be like that. We anticipate and eagerly await an arrival, only to find out the arrival isn’t quite ready for us.

So let’s take a deep breath and persevere a bit longer.
Roy Goble is the co-founder and CEO of PathLight International. And yeah, you really should click that link because they do awesome stuff. He is also an author, runs a real estate investment company in Silicon Valley (don’t hate him for it), and is a follower of Jesus in his own weird, honest, confused way. He is easily bribed with good wine, pictures of golden retrievers, and dad jokes. Roy has been married to his high school sweetheart for over forty years, and they have two adult children who are doing amazing stuff.

Day 20: Dreaming Big

As Mary and Joseph were traveling toward Bethlehem, I wonder when they first pondered the universal implications of what was happening. They were about to become parents to a child who would rule Israel. That had to be exhilarating. And terrifying.

You know, despite every other incredible thing they were asked to believe, their baby ruling Israel might have been right at the top of the list for unbelievability. A teenage girl gets pregnant and then marries a guy from a backwater part of the world … and their son will be King? That sort of thing is for fairy tales, not real life.

Yet the angel told them exactly that. Yesterday we talked about hope. And hope is what allows us to dream big.

Mary and Joseph knew their Scriptures and understood the prophecies. If this child was indeed the Messiah, then he had to be King, and his sweep would be global. Israel was just the first step. This child, due any day now, would change the world.

After Jesus was born, learned a trade, started a ministry, was crucified, arose from the dead, and ascended into heaven (quite a resume), his story began to spread around the world. Wherever the story of Jesus landed, it was contextualized to fit the culture in a way Mary and Joseph could never have predicted.

Thus Jesus, the Middle Eastern man, became Jesus the blonde in Europe, Japanese Jesus, Nigerian Jesus, and so on. Somehow I doubt Mary ever visualized that. I just don’t see her asking Joseph, “Do you think he’ll have blue eyes like my dad?”

I’m getting sidetracked. My point here is that as Mary and Joseph traveled, they had time to ponder the universal impact of their growing family. And I wonder … did they dream as big as they should? Was it even possible to dream that big?

How about you? This Advent, as you wait in anticipation, how might your dreams be bigger?
Roy Goble is the co-founder and CEO of PathLight International. And yeah, you really should click that link because they do awesome stuff. He is also an author, runs a real estate investment company in Silicon Valley (don’t hate him for it), and is a follower of Jesus in his own weird, honest, confused way. He is easily bribed with good wine, pictures of golden retrievers, and dad jokes. Roy has been married to his high school sweetheart for over forty years, and they have two adult children who are doing amazing stuff.

Day 19: Hope

Our determined couple plods closer to Bethlehem.

In the same way they pass different villages and landmarks, they also pass different stages of processing what is happening. Surprise, fear, confusion, awkwardness, discomfort, planning, dreaming, conceding, craving, and worry are all in the mix of emotions and realities they experience. It’s an incredibly human experience, even as they participate in something with eternal consequences.

This is all part of Advent. Anticipation is a complicated thing. Joy and wonder can coexist with heartbreak and confusion.

But throughout everything, one underlying truth keeps surfacing: the need for hope.

Hope is what drives this entire story. Hope that this child is indeed the hope of the world. Hope that this whole journey is part of God’s perfect—and perfectly confusing—plan. Hope that all will be well.

Maybe even the simple hope that the place they rested would have good ice cream and a clean bathroom.

Advent is about hope on every level. You want macro-level hope? The Messiah is coming! You want micro-level hope? Joseph would have a son! You want eternal hope? God is setting the stage for reconciliation with the entirety of creation! How about simple human hope? Mary is a mother.

Hope drives this story.

Hope is what Advent is.

So this Advent, as you deal with all the trappings of the season and rush to and fro, take time to rest in the hope of Advent. And to keep hoping … even for the simple things.
Did you know that the PathLight mission is to provide “hope through faith and learning?” Even something as simple as the hope of a high school sponsorship drives students to work harder and achieve more.
This Advent, I hope you can help PathLight provide hope to
teenagers who need all the help they can get.

Day 18: Should we start a college fund

There’s another part of Advent we don’t like to think too much about: worry.

Especially when it comes to childbirth. We know the ending—Jesus was born safely by all appearances—so we forget about what it must have felt like for Mary and Joseph. But every parent worries about the day, including Mary and Joseph.

One of the things I love about the ministry of PathLight is how it brings joy to parents. Their dream of an education for their child transforms from something to worry about to something that will actually happen. How cool is that?

Mary and Joseph had plenty of time to worry as they made their way to Bethlehem. They had time to dream too, ponder what was happening, and even worship in the midst of it all. But they were human, and they had their worries.

Mary and Joseph dealt with the worries every young couple deals with. Will we be ready when the baby is born? Will the baby be healthy? Will we be good parents? Should we start a college fund?

Okay, maybe not that last one—obviously Jesus went to trade school! But in general, whether 2000 years ago or today, we worry when we think about what might happen. We worry a lot.

This Advent, what might happen if we could put aside our worries? I’m not suggesting we shouldn’t do anything—it’s not like we can say, “I’m just not going to worry about feeding those people coming over for the Christmas party.”

But what if we actively, ruthlessly attacked worry? How might that release our hearts and minds to discover joy instead of living in apprehension?

I don’t have the answer to those questions, by the way. I’ve never quite been able to pull it off. But I still try, and I’d love to hear if you’ve had success.
Hey, want to make a dream come true for parents who have long worried for their children? There are still teens in Belize who need help to attend high school. Their parents’ worries are not so different from the worries Mary and Joseph had. This Christmas, I’m asking people to alleviate that worry by donating through PathLight.

Day 16: Magazines and Yoga

Remember magazines?

My wife subscribed to several back in the day. Before a trip, she loved to gather any unread issues and bring them along. Whether the trip was by car or plane, those magazines would start as a heavy pile and slowly dwindle as the days went by. They were perfect for a trip because when she finished an issue she would leave it behind, give it to someone else, or toss it in the recycling. (I suspect there are still dozens of her magazines floating around Belize.)

I’ve long imagined a silly picture of Mary riding the donkey and reading a magazine as Joseph led them toward Bethlehem. And I can just imagine the ensuing conversation.

“Joe,” Mary would begin, “have you heard of yoga? Some wise men from the East are talking all about it these days. Apparently, there’s a class in Bethlehem for expectant mothers. Maybe we should go?”

And Joe knew it wasn’t really a question, but rather a statement that they would be going to a yoga class with a lot of other couples.

A silly made-up story? Yes, of course. Mary didn’t sign up for, say, breastfeeding classes at the local community college.

But every mother does something to prepare for the big day. Maybe it’s asking friends and family to help out. Maybe it’s stockpiling a few easy-to-prepare meals. Maybe it’s just making the bed a little more comfortable.

That’s a part of Advent we can overlook. It’s anticipating what is to come and then doing something to prepare. If all we do is anticipate, we won’t be ready. And if all we do is prepare, we won’t be fully living in the moment.

Christmas is coming soon. You’ve been anticipating; are you prepared?
Roy Goble is the co-founder and CEO of PathLight International. And yeah, you really should click that link because they do awesome stuff. He is also an author, runs a real estate investment company in Silicon Valley (don’t hate him for it), and is a follower of Jesus in his own weird, honest, confused way. He is easily bribed with good wine, pictures of golden retrievers, and dad jokes. Roy has been married to his high school sweetheart for over forty years, and they have two adult children who are doing amazing stuff.

Day 15: “Oh, my God, the baby’s kicking.”

The beauty of the Christmas story is how real the people were.

Think of it this way: do you think Mary ever had morning sickness? Did parts of her body swell during her pregnancy? What must it have been like the first time she felt the baby in her womb kick?

We don’t usually picture that, but Mary underwent all the physical changes a pregnant woman encounters, and was as shocked and joyful as any expecting mother when Jesus kicked. (“Oh my God, the baby is kicking! No wait, I mean, oh my baby, God is kicking! Um … Jesus is kicking?!”)

This was not some mystic, perfect childbirth experience. There were days of utter joy and fascination, but there would have always been that sense of concern, right? How could an expectant mother not have a touch of fear about the delivery?

This is a part of Advent we don’t often explore because it’s just too confusing.

If Advent is about living in anticipation, then we have to be honest that what we hope for can also be what we fear. Mary, an expectant teenager, understood this well.

The mystery of Advent is how it encompasses the entirety of it all. We anticipate celebrating the coming of Jesus as we anticipate fear of God dwelling among us.

Theologians talk about Jesus being both fully divine and fully human. He was God incarnate, blending all the righteousness of God with all the fragility of a human body. Jesus, because he was born of Mary and conceived of the Holy Spirit, was the ultimate junkyard rebuild. He was bits and pieces you didn’t expect to ever see together.

That’s the beauty, mystery, and depth of Advent.
Roy Goble is the co-founder and CEO of PathLight International. And yeah, you really should click that link because they do awesome stuff. He is also an author, runs a real estate investment company in Silicon Valley (don’t hate him for it), and is a follower of Jesus in his own weird, honest, confused way. He is easily bribed with good wine, pictures of golden retrievers, and dad jokes. Roy has been married to his high school sweetheart for over forty years, and they have two adult children who are doing amazing stuff.