Hire Comedians USA
Hire Comedians USA has produced hundreds of comedy shows for enthusiastic customers since 1995. Our clients love our service. Just read our testimonials.
We have booked comedians for large corporate events and small private parties. Our comedy entertainers have an average of twenty five years experience. We have provided entertainers for temples and churches as well as bachelor parties. We have sent comedians to more than forty states, including rural Alaska. Whatever the occasion, whoever the audience, wherever the location, we were able to select
27/06/2021
How to Hire a Comedian
I should select an agency with local comedians, right?
You've done a Google search for “Hire Comedians” or some similar term and you've found popular websites that feature local comedians, nationwide. I won't name them here, but they have hundreds, maybe thousands, of comedians, listed throughout the United States, listed by city and state. Surely, these comedians will be less expensive as they don't have related travel or lodging costs.
A closer look tells you yes, many are very affordable. Some only cost $100. Jackpot.
Beware, beware, beware. These websites feature amateur comedians. What is an amateur comedian? Someone who primarily preforms at “open mic” nights. Someone who does not make a living as a comedian. Someone who does not play clubs in the area. Someone who one day decided to call themselves a comedian. Someone who's not funny for very long, if at all. Someone who's not worth a hundred dollars.
But they're on this website. They have what used to be called a glossy photo and television credits. Somebody thinks they're funny. Wrong. These website are great at marketing “beginners,” hacks and phonies.
Anyone (who pays a fee) can be on these websites. Yes, you could declare yourself a comedian, have someone snap your photo, fabricate (oops, exaggerate) your resume and you too can be a star.
At Hire Comedians USA, we feature only real comedians. Our entertainers have an average of 25 years experience on the professional stage. We carefully vet each comedian and verify every television credit. No, our comedians don't perform for $100. You'll pay a fair market price. But you'll get the real thing.
20/06/2021
How to Hire a Comedian
I should watch video clips of various comedians, right?
Sure. Go ahead. Watch some videos. It might even be entertaining, but its a poor way to choose a comedian.
But how can that be? Isn't what I see and hear, what I'll get? Well, not necessarily. Most video clips are brief and most people don't watch more than a few minutes, even if the clip is longer. What you're seeing is the comedian at their best. And some are truly funny—for five minutes. The comedian will likely need to perform for 30 to 45 minutes, depending on your type of event. Being consistently funny for that length of time requires significant skill and years of practice.
And, what you saw, is not necessarily the version you'll receive. Many comedians showcase a “clean set,” friendly for all audiences. Don't be too surprised, however, if away from the video camera, the comedian slips in some jokes that are, well, less than appropriate.
“I've watched enough video to know he or she is funny in the way I want them to be,” you say. Isn't that enough, for goodness sake. Not really. What you don't know and won't know is the comedian's professionalism, that is, their reputation off stage. There are lots of funny folks out there who can't find work because of their off stage antics.
You might discover that the comedian whose video you thought was perfect will cancel at the “last minute” because they got a better paying gig. Or perhaps they have a lateness problem. Do you really want to worry when they will arrive? Or perhaps they have another problem, you know, the kind too common to show biz types? Do you really want to worry that they'll be able to perform?
At Hire Comedians USA we carefully vet each performer. They represent us, and we take that seriously. Our comedians will funny and polished on stage, proper and polite off stage. They will make you look good, not feel regret.
13/06/2021
How to Hire a Comedian
I should select an agency with the famous name comedians, right?
Some agencies (and their websites) list celebrity comedians on their roster: Jerry Seinfeld, Ellen DeGeneres, Wanda Sykes. Surely these agencies are reputable or these famous folks wouldn't do business with them? Surely the other comedians listed I haven't heard of must be just as funny? And, who knows, maybe, just maybe, Jay Leno will show up for my charity fund raiser?
All these assumptions are incorrect. First, Jimmy Fallon, or any other famous comedian listed, despite the fact that his or her photo and description may appear prominently, will not be performing for your event or party. No, not if its for a “good cause,” not if you have lots of money in your budget, and not because the agency dangles them before you. These entertainers have long since stopped playing those sorts of “gigs.”
They are on the website as “click bate.” And it worked, they got your attention. And those other comedians on the site, the ones you've never heard of, they must be just as good, after all, they're represented by the same agency that represents the “big names.” Also incorrect. Look closely at the small print on the website and you will see a disclaimer stating that they are not the exclusive agents for any of the stars.
These sites use the celebrities' photos and descriptions as an implied endorsement. Look who we represent, they boast. We're big time, they suggest. And those other comedians, the ones you've never heard of, they must also be famous, or about to be, or at lease funny or they wouldn't be on the same agency site.
Beware. These are the real comedians the agency will attempt to book for your event. Are they funny? Who knows? That's only one consideration anyway. What you should ask is “Who's the best choice for my event, my audience, my budget.”
At Hire Comedians USA, we don't pretend to represent the famous faces you see on television. But our professional comedians are funny, experienced and affordable. We will help you to carefully select just the right one.
It is off-key creativity that spawns comedian Tom Anzalone's usual standing ovation. His Springsteen recites the alphabet (to the tune of "Born In The U.S.A."), his Pinball Wizard (from the rock opera Tommy) is sung, well, opera style.
You don't have to like football to love "The Coach," comedian Tom Whiteley's rasp-voiced, bug-eyed other self. Outfitted in Knute Rockne-era garb, Whiteley scores laugh after laugh with his carefully crafted monologues and high-adrenaline performance. Wildly unique, consistently funny, Whiteley is the special comedian audiences will remember for the rest of their lives.
Socially aware and honest, with a poised and polished delivery beyond his young years, Neko White's comedic confessions and observations will rock audiences of any age.
Serious musician Paul Venier could be said to play the guitar and keyboard for laughs. Versatile Venier arranges comedy, crowd participation and music into a "no-two-shows-the same" spectacular. He is the rare comedian audiences return to see again and again.
With a heightened inflection and introspection gained from years in psychotherapy, comedian Bruce Smirnoff tells funny-because-they're-true stories about bad dates, crazy relatives and professional disappointments.
With an agile mind and perfect staccato rhythm, comedian Shaffer targets topics such as pillow and potpourri popularity with precision. His dead-on impression of a fuddled drunk is never to be forgotten funny.
Fierce and fearless as she tackles taboo topics with modest playfulness, comedian Rosborough's rendition is a master class in the art of stand-up. Boffo belly laughs abound.
Comedian Peaches Rodriguez has performed at many of the nation's top comedy clubs such as New York City's famous Comic Strip and Carolines, as well as the Harlem's legendary Apollo Theater, Atlantic City's prestigious Caesars, Harrahs and Tropicana Hotels and Las Vegas' fabulous Riviera Hotel.
The silly faces, the nervous gestures, the halting delivery...he’s got you laughing and he hasn’t even told a joke yet. When he does, this veteran performer delights. Observational and kinetic, comedian Rizzo produces rapid-fire laughs.
Nancy Redman has rightfully earned a place in the top echelon of the nation's comedians. Verbally and physically dexterous, her performance is a high energy explosion of crazy characters and sharp one liners. Part Lily Tomlin, part Groucho Marx, she is a perfect choice for any event.
John Pizzi's puppets take the words right out of his mouth. There's Smiley, a cranky, 99-year-old widow, Smoky, a hip hoppin', jive-talkin' small-time hustler and sarcastic but lovable Andy who hates everyone equally. Comedian Pizzi closes his show with a gotta see, gunna scream transformation of audience volunteer into a outrageous singing human puppet.
Mike Morse is a man of infinite jest. Most comedians would be content to perform a first-class stand-up routine. But laugh-maker Morse doesn't stop there. He interjects song parodies, wacky props and a Mick Jagger imitation that could leave the Queen of England amused. Multi-talented Morse builds bit upon bit, applause break after applause break, and closes with a hilarious, can't-miss, musical hand puppet show.
Bill McCarty is one of the nation's most gifted comedians. Clever and quick, thoughtful and aware, he elevates stand-up comedy to the level of fine art. His funny, imaginative routines and good-humored jibes are perfect for any audience, any event.
Comedian Vinnie Mark's best trick is to change traditional magic into non-stop laughs before your very eyes. Vinnie Mark delivers joke after joke, gag after gag, and leaves audiences on their feet with a real, live straightjacket escape. Las Vegas slick and Sunday school proper, alchemist Mark transforms audience participation, one-liners and a few surprises into pure platinum.
Can't remember your own name? Think your shoe is a cell phone? Sounds like you've volunteered to be hypnotized by mentalist Marshal Manlove.
Watching comedian Don MacArthur improv with an audience is akin to watching a maestro conduct the philharmonic.
An animated performer with a rapid-fire delivery, comedian Louise skewers marriage, motherhood and men from a witty woman's perspective.
Brainy beauty Leighann Lord is a sure-to-be-star who draws audiences into her bright orbit with a carefully constructed and artfully performed act. Laughter and applause compete as comedian Lord punches out a fast-paced, personal and passionate monologue that shines with memories of her mother's advice about men, fantasies of babies delivered by FedEx and qualms about prisoners who get a free college education.
Disguised in trademark overalls and shaggy hair, stands comic genius Jay London. The self-described "fourth guy from the left on the evolutionary chart" mixes Steven Wright-style one-liners with a sweet dollop of self-deprecation. Audiences love London who continues to regret he "was born nine months premature."
Exaggerated phrasing and facial expressions accentuate comedian Lancy's exasperation at the world's absurdities with sidesplitting results.
Deep-voiced, beret-adorned and smart-suited, comedian Melvin George is the epitome of understated hipness. Whether musing life's stages of coolness or mocking Motown dance moves, Melvin leaves audiences justly jubilant.
It's not ordinarily funny when the police stop your car and give you a ticket. But Mike Eagan is no ordinary comedian. He perceptively speeds through this and other everyday experiences with radar-gun precision and hilarious results.
A powerful performer, comedian Vic DiBitetto churns energy, honesty and humanity into nonstop laughter. His pace is frenetic. His material vivid and true. From his first words, to his famous, word-free, mannequin head encore, DiBitetto leaves his audience speechless with laughter.
Imagine Dorothy in The Wizard of Oz played by Sylvester Stallone. Or an adult 900 line answered by Elmer Fudd. Jim Dailakis' comic gift is to create such premises, provide the perfect voices and pack this into an already hilarious stand-up routine. Dailakis is a one-of-a-kind performer who delights and surprises with a talent as untamed as the Australian outback.
Observational, iconoclastic and joyfully angry, mirth maker Paul Bond takes traditional stand-up and infuses it with incredible energy, emotion and song. Awestruck audiences will appreciate how much laughter can spring from a simple guitar.
The spirit of Andy Kauffman lives. With a few simple props, guitar and roll of electrical tape (yes, electrical tape), comedian Tom Anzalone produces quick and quirky musical impersonations of Elvis, Elton, Springsteen and countless more. Tom Anzalone consistently hits the right notes for any audience.
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| Monday | 09:00 - 17:00 |
| Tuesday | 09:00 - 17:00 |
| Wednesday | 09:00 - 17:00 |
| Thursday | 09:00 - 17:00 |
| Friday | 09:00 - 17:00 |