Truckin' Proverbs

Just in time for Mother's Day 2023 - a safety bulletin for all those last minute husband's shoppin'.

So today I forgot my trusty bandana and had to buy one at a fuel station to get through my stops. I went from... "Geesh those colors are sure bright!" (This morning.) To... "Oh crap... did I just wear some sort of a distorted cherub on my neck ALL DAY." Some days real life is the funniest and most stupid thing ever!

There is a certain swagger that a man who is leaving the gym strolls forth in. This is the type of confidence one only gains by kicking one's own butt. You are the man (or woman) that stands in your way of swag walkin'.

When eating at the house where waffles are made in the same room you eat them in, be not wise in your own eyes. Do not loudly proclaim, "Wow, this table is sticky!" It will be seen as a curse coming from one who only masters the very obvious. Instead quietly request of your server that they wipe the table again, while taking your order. He who wins friends of the people that handles his food, is truly wise.

Came across this singular sign today at a truck stop. It was like a reminiscent visit to the past. Made me feel a little warm and at home inside, like "remember when the world was pre-2020". Remember the good not-so-old days.

A recent event got me to thinkin'...
Suppose you drop your cell phone in a lake, for it to sink to the bottom (and it ain't water proof!). It could be worse friend. Consider dropping your only set of truck keys into a portable plastic outhouse many miles from home. That's a fishin' trip I could live without!

Celebrate every victory. I passed a Nissan GT R and a new model Corvette at the same time today, in a company vehicle. It felt great. (They were on the back of a car hauler, but still... It was enjoyable.)

The world of truckin'proverbs is likened unto two men grilling. Both men unknowingly have their propane tanks running low. One man runs out of propane and does not have a backup, his meat is half cooked and his dinner is in crisis. The other man quickly replaces his propane tank with his full backup tank and grills to perfection. Follow the path of wisdom my son, it is clearly the path to a satisfied life (and stomach).

Life hack... If you can not find a tablespoon when you need coffee, just use an icecream scoop and the same number of recommended scoops to brew.

Listen men, OSHA requirements clearly state we should be providing any woman; spending more than 8 hours at home with two or more kids under 10 years old, hearing protection.

Specifics below:
"OSHA requires employers to implement a hearing conservation program when noise exposure is at or above 85 decibels averaged over 8 working hours, or an 8-hour time-weighted average (TWA). Hearing conservation programs strive to prevent initial occupational hearing loss, preserve and protect remaining hearing, and equip workers with the knowledge and hearing protection devices necessary to safeguard themselves."
-official OSHA standard

When the first thing you want strangers to know about you, is that your ancestors sailed in Roman vessels.

It is deeply satisfying when you prepare to reverse; so honk your air horn, and all the geese
waddling in the nearby field stop and look at you like, "WHAT did you just say to me?!?"

When you only today realize that there is actually a Hicksville, and think wow... this is country. THEN your GPS says turn onto "Cass-ay-bear Miller Rd" and when you read the sign it is prounced much differently to you. You might just be in redneck country.

If you meet a tollbooth worker who does NOT hate their job and tell you so with their face, is it customary to tip? Asking in case I ever meet one.

Being a Friday, it is wise to celebrate it around most people. But, if the person you are near is required to work Saturday do not loudly celebrate the arrival of the weekend, my son. It will be folly to them. Two things they hate, joy in others and smiling eyes after lunch on Friday.

Greeting your coworkers and customers with a "Happy Friday!" on a Thursday is not wise my son. Notice yourself that it is Thursday or many more quizzical looks and snears you may receive. Oh shucks.

If required to join a zoom webinar for work; and the need to roll your eyes arises in session, make sure your video is muted. Happy Monday!

Invite your friends to like and feel free to share all our posts on your fb feed. Happy Saturday friends! Keep grinnin'!

My son. When you see the harlot at the corner in front of the pawn shop, do not be seduced by her knobby tires or tough looking grill. Rejoice in the wife of your youth. Call her and she will keep you on the path of wisdom and away from the path to the grave.

Welcome to !

The aim of this page is simple.

Laugh a bit... it makes the miles worth drivin'.

Windshield coated with an uncountable hoard of dead bugs? It is proof warmer weather is finally here! Remember this... Yucky stuff is often evidence that something awesome is hap'nin'.

You attempt to throw the peel to the banana you just savored out the passenger window while rollin', AND it spreads open and hits the window leaving a big smear before falling back in your cab. ...
Remember this friend. Even Jesus was betrayed by one close to Him.