Avy Gonzalez

Happy 80th Bday To the Matriarch of our family! Grateful to have her with us another year.

I wanted to throw her a big birthday bash to celebrate but I couldn't pull it together.

So we spent the day talking and reminiscing over her childhood over some ice cream cake.

In hindsight, I don't think she would have preferred to have it any other way.

Ps. She told me she got hit on the other day! 😆 My mom still got it!

Happy Monday! Shout out to my accountability partner for getting back on track this morning with our health journeys. Feeling good, like I should!

I love you, Mami! -Avy

Comment below if you would like to be in the launch group and get a free copy of the book for your honest review.

Be inspired by those who persevere through hard work, dignity and integrity.

Drop some love if you agree!

Feeling off? It might be stress.

Join me in the 30 day challenge!

Don't worry, I am starting late too!

Let me know if you are participating. ❤

My Response:  *Trigger Warning: DV*
 
My cousin posted this question on her own page. I responded as well as I could in Spanish but this is my amended response in English. 
 
I don’t think that anyone can actually say what they would do in this situation because there are just too many variables that impact the decisions we make and actions we take as humans.  Who you are at this very moment in time is not who you might be if your loved one is actually constantly being bullied or under attack. (Or maybe you are)  Who you are at this moment in time, is not who you might be if you are triggered in a way that makes unresolved trauma surface in a way you didn’t even expect. Trauma is a real thing.  
 
What some may not know about Will Smith’s trauma is that he has admitted feeling like a coward most of his life for not stopping his father from beating his mother as a child.  Does Chris Rock’s joke compare to domestic violence, not exactly, but when there has been a history of someone coming at your loved one, verbal attacks, and not just that person specifically, but people in general, and you have played nice, laughed it off, bit your tongue, thrown up the peace sign, kept it moving, constantly made amends, but they keep coming at you…and all of a sudden, you are subconsciously brought back to the place and time in your life when you wish you could have changed the story that you have carried with you forever. What do you think happens to the mind?  Medically, I can’t tell you.   Personally, I can.
 
Some may not understand what that is like.  I feel like I do.  I have been triggered in ways I never imagined and done things I am not proud of that I immediately regretted. I didn’t purposefully do them.  They just happened. When I started to see a pattern of those things happening, I decided to get help, because it got to the point, where I no longer felt in control. Do you think Will Smith was in control to have put his entire career at risk on the night he had probably been waiting for the past 30 years, in front of the entire world?  Think about that. He has apologized to everyone but the person he is going to need the most forgiveness from is himself. (Cont..)

Good Morning. I hope you have a beautiful day filled with moments of gratitude.

More people need to read this. Please share!

Accountability and forgiveness is freedom.

Especially when it comes to apologizing to yourself and forgiving yourself.

The hardest part is finding that alignment but I promise you it is possible. It takes time but it is definitely possible.

Credit:

Have you been showing yourself kindness lately?

I find that it has to be a very intentional process for me after years of doing the opposite.

Would love to know more about how you show yourself kindness. Believe it or not, it may help me as well as someone else reading this thread.

Comment below or send me a dm.

You have so much to offer even if it may not feel like it sometimes.

It took me a while to recognize my value again after years of feeling broken and worthless. Yeah, i know, that sounds harsh. I didn't even really realize that I was living deep in that kind of mental space but I was in the thick of it.

There was so much I wanted to do. So many ways I wanted to help people but I couldn't. I was stuck. How could I help people when I was struggling with my own worth.

Once I started to work on my relationship with myself again, being kinder to myself and showing myself grace, I started to see my value again. I started being able to take control of the things that kept me lost and embrace the things that made me feel alive.

You have so much to offer even if it may not feel like it sometimes. Give yourself time and before you know it, you will begin to see it again.

You are a gift. Never forget that!

A reminder to myself and those who need to hear it most. Grateful to not carry this burden as much as I use to. Please share because so many people still do.

Time to be a little selfish. Show some love if you agree!

❤

Ever felt excited about a new chapter in your life?

After feeling nervous and anxious this morning about starting a new job, these two beautiful humans poured love and words of affirmation into me.

Honored and blessed to be their mami.

This was a brand new day for all of us. I can feel it. There is an indescribable shift of incredible things to come.

Anyone seen Dune yet?

The girls had half a day earlier this week and I surprised them with a trip to the movie theatre right after they got dismissed. I haven't been to one with them since before the pandemic started.

Had never read or seen anything related to Dune prior to this. Yet, the movie made a huge impression on me. Mostly because of this quote that could be heard chanted in the background in a couple of scenes.

It really struck a chord with me because I realized that through all of the self forgiveness work I have been doing, it has become so much easier to face my fears. This quote is such a vivid description of what that process is like. In facing it, you have to let it wash over you. You have to let go of whatever it is you were so scared of protecting yourself against.

Whether it be:
* the fear of failure,
* not meeting the expectations you have of yourself, or
* the fear of what others may think.

In the end, once the fear is gone because you have let it go, the best version of yourself remains. The one who believes they are worthy, deserving and capable enough to see the fruits that exist on the other side of fear. The one who can connect with their intuition and reality rather than a false sense of self, derived from the traumatic experiences of life.

Looking forward to part 2. Would love to hear your thoughts in the comments below.

Happy 10th Birthday to my baby! You are a treasure. Every day with you is a blessing. I love you!

The guilt, shame and self doubt of old versions of yourself will try to creep in and take over but don't you let them.

Stand firm with gratitude and excitement in all that you have fought to become and still have yet to be!

Show ❤ if you feel this.

Some people have some nerve. To never have walked in your shoes and feel inclined to point fingers. To take and not reciprocate. To feel entitled and never gracious. I can go on. It is upsetting to witness and even more so to realize that you tolerated it.

Rest easy in knowing that you won't do it any longer, that you see the truth and that you won't give these kinds of people any more of your precious time, energy or resources.

Throw your 🙌🏼 up if you feel me on this one.

Can you say this and mean it?

Repost from

There was a time when I couldn't. I would say it but I didn't truly believe it. I knew that if I could get to the point where I actually believed this, my life would continue to shift in the direction I wanted it to go.

For the first time on a loooong time, I actually believe this.

I am not going to lie. It took a lot of work to get here but my point is simply to tell you that changing your beliefs and mindset for the better are possible. It can be done. So if you are stuck in a rough place, a dark place, a fog, have a little faith and choose to believe change is possible. That is half the battle. Once you make that choice, you can start putting in the work.

Throw some 🙌🏼 if you choose to believe.

On this World Mental Health Awareness Day, I wanted to share a project I have been working on.

It is a digital book on my take on the freedom of self forgiveness, a huge component in my own mental health journey.

From questioning its value to now recognizing its magic, it is a creation that I am very proud of.

So if you see a suggestion or friend request from this account, it is indeed me.

If you are curious about this topic, want to know when the digital book is released or just want to support, please feel free to follow

There will be additional posts on that account in the coming days.

As always, thank you for the continued love and support.

This one goes out to me and anyone else who needs it.

❤🙏

Thank you, Kai!

Kai has been my therapist for the past two years but is at the point careerwise where it is time to move on from the practice that brought us together.

When I got the news 2 weeks ago, I was cool with it. Then it hit me and the tears came.

See I know that being a therapist is Kai's job but I hadn't fully realized just how significant and important of a job it really is.

I met Kai, during what I consider the darkest period of my life. I sought therapy because the fear of what would happen if I didn't do it far ourweighed the fear of trying. We spoke once a week consistently for 2 years, at first in person and then the rest of the time over the phone.

She helped to pull me out of the fog, to learn to love myself again, to have a better relationship with my kids, to cope with past trauma and manage my anxiety, to set up new boundaries and claim my power back. She got me through the end of 2019, the trauma of 2020, and the recovery that was most of 2021.

Whether or not I ever get to see her again, she became my friend. How can someone who chooses a career in helping people at this level not be?

Thank you so much, Kai, for making such a difference in my life, for all that you do for all of your clients. Thank you to all the therapists of the world who take this responsiblity seriously.

I made the right decision!

A few months ago when I first connected to these women in our Accelerator Mastermind group, I had no idea the impact they would have on my life.

The growth we have all had, the value we are all ready to offer and the community we have built are not anything you can put a price on.

As life has gotten busy and stressful again, I wasn't entirely sure if I could commit to another 12 week cycle of us working together but deep down inside, I felt pulled to be here again. So I decided to bet on me and my ability to make it work. As soon as I signed on to zoom and saw these women, my entire body relaxed with certainty that I was exactly where I needed to be.

Can wait to start sharing with you all that we have been working on!

To my solo moms. You are a boss and don't you forget it. Some may underestimate you but they have NO Idea all that you do and just how transferable those skills are.

Keep Rising!

Losing it? Anxiety, stress, overwhelm?

Trust the power of your senses and what you are feeding them.

Came home to find a huge dog mess, a horrible smell, on top of an urgent to do list. Felt my nerves, anxiety, anger and frustration kicking in.

The most daunting trigger was the smell and I knew I had to address that right away. I don't keep chemical sprays or fragrances in the house. They give me headaches.

I do have sage, though, and put it to work right away. Not only did it kill the smell immediately, the smell of the sage set a wave of calm over my body. I felt relaxed and was able to address the mess calmly, quickly and move back into my day with ease.

This experience just reminded me of the power of our senses. This was an in my face type of example of both a negative and postive olfactory experience. Yet, what about the times our senses are affecting our overall mood in subtle ways that we aren't paying attention to?

The moral of the story:
Slow down.
Be present.
Pay attention.
Be mindful.
Be intentional.
Take care of yourself.