Dr. Josiah Hackney

One of the most powerful things you can do for yourself and your health is be attentive to your physical and emotional needs.

And it’s more than just a “when mama ain’t happy ain’t nobody happy” situation - when mama is cared for, she’s better supported to care for others.

But being aware, without action, leads to frustration. And oftentimes the lack of action is connected to a lack of communication.

All four of our girls have needed to be in constant physical contact with me the entire weekend. I love them. I love to be there for them. IT’S A LOT. And I am drained. Sitting at dinner tonight thinking about how all of them had baths I found myself frustrated I didn’t have time set aside for me to just be in the bath without a care in the world (or adorable person attached to me)… and I almost left it there, to turn into resentment… as I have many times before.😬

Tonight I decided to make a different choice: I communicated my needs.

So here I sit in my Epsom salt bath. Breathing. Grateful for the support. Seeing each minute as a gift. And proud of myself for making a choice that the me of the past (maybe even yesterday😅) would consider selfish, when in reality it was the best thing I could do for all of the people I love so dearly.

My daughters.

The ones who made me a mother.

The ones I would die for, and live for.

My experiences with them have shaped who I am as a mother and as a doctor.

They are kind, loving, creative, genuine, spunky souls and I am so grateful to hear their sweet voices call me “mama.”

When my husband and I were first in practice, we felt guilty for spending time away from our clinic. As the years - and children - have added up, our feelings have changed.

We certainly care for our patients, which is why we are never gone long and always come back.💕 And it is still hard for us to leave knowing there are pregnant mamas very close to meeting their babies or little ones with tension in their bodies who would absolutely benefit from adjustments during the time we are away.

But see those beautiful little girls in this photo? The ones who have taught us so much and shaped who we are as individuals, parents, and doctors - those girls are only this little once. And you know the warm, fun environment when both doctors are in the clinic? That’s not there if we’re not nurturing our relationship outside of clinic. So as the days seem to pass quicker with every addition to our family, we’re becoming more intentional with our time with these babies, and each other.

We also recognize that we’re able to provide the best care for others when we’ve cared for ourselves first. Fortunately we both have amazing chiropractic care from the best doctor we know, 😉 but that’s just a part of supporting the health of a person, and it doesn’t replace our innate need for rest.

Everyone needs a break, a change of scenery - even from something they *love* doing. We’re not big on using the word “vacation” when the whole crew is there and babies still waking by 6am every morning 🥱 but you get the idea. We all need a reset. And we all benefit from investing in our relationships with loved ones.

So we spent last week out of clinic together as a family, took a longer maternity leave with the twins… not because it was easy (all you self-employed people out there get that!😅), but because it was good for our children, for ourselves, and for you.

You don’t ever need anyone’s permission to make you and your family’s needs a priority, but we know it helps to see other people doing it too.💚

When I was a teenager with daily migraines, I was (reluctantly) introduced to chiropractic care - it was the only thing that helped me. My chiropractor explained the connection between the brain and body through the spinal cord and nerves, how the alignment and movement of the spine affects that connection, and that the pain I was experiencing was my body signaling there was stress - subluxation - in the nervous system. It just made sense.

I wanted to help others the way I had been helped, so I made the decision to go to chiropractic school.

There I was introduced to prenatal and pediatric care and fell in love with serving those families. I became Webster Certified and began the series to learn more about caring for mamas and babies.

When I was pregnant with our first, we prepared for birth SO well! Postpartum? Not so much… she was almost our only child.

I wanted others have a better experience, so I dove into learning about postpartum support and was able to care for, connect with, and love on the mothers in my clinic better because of what I went through.

As grateful as I was to be there for those women, I also couldn’t help but wonder if it had to be this way - is postpartum bound to be miserable?

I love this quote from Bishop Desmond Tutu: “there comes a point where we need to stop pulling people out of the river. We need to go upstream and find out why they’re falling in.”

That’s where preconception work came in. Preparing for conception. Planning for pregnancy and postpartum by being intentional with choices before either. That’s what I did before my second pregnancy. I followed the .protocol and had a lovely pregnancy (minus some nausea) *and* postpartum, and a very healthy, bright baby girl.

Before my third pregnancy, my husband and I both committed to preconception care (50% of the genes come from each of us, so it just makes sense we both are on this fertility journey) and I had a healthy TWIN pregnancy with NO nausea, two radiantly healthy girls, and my best postpartum yet!

So here I am, upstream, reminding you that you have your own beautiful and unique journey, and I’m here to support you on it.💚

💚