Borrowed my wings

All that have lost a child that they dearly wanted will understand.🥺😢

We see you, we feel your heart ♥️ and we love you

Affirmation Wednesday 💕💔💕

Allow yourself a reprieve even if it feels like you are unfaithful to their memory. You are not being unfaithful ~ you are in survival mode and feelings can be deceptive sometimes.🥺🥹

Modern impressionist is a wonderful effort to make

We have all lost a child and our hearts ache on the same frequency ~ we are not alone in this sadness

We want life to stop for just a little while to give us time to grieve and breathe before it assaults our senses with families living their lives with their children/babies. Lord, have mercy on the mothers that have had their lives ripped apart by an unbearable loss.

Please let your voice be heard on this topic at every chance you get. Stay aware and engage at all opportunities.

‘Emotional slap in the face’: Moms want stillbirths to be covered by paid family leave “Does a woman not have a right in this country to heal her body after delivering a child?”

Never be ashamed of our scars even when they are on our hearts 💔💔❤️‍🩹

"Today was a Difficult Day," said Pooh.

There was a pause.

"Do you want to talk about it?" asked Piglet.

"No," said Pooh after a bit. "No, I don't think I do."

"That's okay," said Piglet, and he came and sat beside his friend.

"What are you doing?" asked Pooh.

"Nothing, really," said Piglet. "Only, I know what Difficult Days are like. I quite often don't feel like talking about it on my Difficult Days either.

"But goodness," continued Piglet, "Difficult Days are so much easier when you know you've got someone there for you. And I'll always be here for you, Pooh."

And as Pooh sat there, working through in his head his Difficult Day, while the solid, reliable Piglet sat next to him quietly, swinging his little legs...he thought that his best friend had never been more right."
A.A. Milne

Our society has become so apt at lies we even believe our own lies. We will never be 100% fine again ~ we’ll learn to carry on and live a life that our child would be proud of us for. We will be able to comfort others that suffer this loss, but our lives are in a different season than it was before. There is a new way to tell time ~ the before and the after. Just lean on your sisters that know your pain. We reach out to you in our sorrowing love.💕💔💕

Today is Bereaved Mother's Day.

If you didn't know this day existed, you might be one of the lucky ones. If you did know this day existed, please know that you're not alone.

Today is the day we honor all of the Mothers who have heavy hearts.

❤️ We honor those still waiting for their miracle.
❤️ We honor those who have had failed fertility treatments.
❤️ We honor those who have lost their embryos.
❤️ We honor those who have had a pregnancy end too soon.
❤️ We honor those who have suffered a stillbirth.
❤️ We honor those who have lost their babies.
❤️ We honor those who have lost their children.

We acknowledge that not all mothers will enjoy Mother's Day. It's a painful reminder of what they've lost, what they no longer have, or what hasn't come easily.

Once a mother, always a mother.
Loss doesn't change that.

Whatever it takes to survive

Praying for everyone that knows this all too well 🙏🏼🙏🏽🙏🏾

We will never forget or stop loving

Our hearts 💕 are with you 💔

Just don’t get lost there or set up housekeeping please

Hope you got a wee smile from this even if it is truer than we want it to be.

We are all in very different places along the journey of grief. We reach out in our pain and love to each of you.

Send love to all that understand this sadness 💕💔

No goodbyes one day💔

Lord, please hear our prayer

How very softly you tiptoed into my world Almost silently; Only a moment you stayed But what an imprint your footprints have left on my heart

We are with you in your grief

Finding Your Own Path Through Grief
No two people experience loss in quite the same way, but there are simple strategies that can help us all to heal.
Dr. Laurie Santos
Jan 17
There’s no “normal” way to greet the pain we experience when we lose a loved one - or endure the grief of a divorce, a job loss or any unwelcome life change.

In my last article, I introduced you to the work of the psychotherapist and bereavement expert Julia Samuel. Her core message is that the way to tackle and overcome our grief is to welcome it in. Trying to hide from the pain - or avoid it - will only cause us to suffer more.

But Julia says there is no single or “correct” path through grief – grieving is both chaotic and unique to each one of us. We often hear about the “stages of grief” - denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance - and wrongly assume that we will move through these stages step by step, with the fifth and final step signalling total recovery from our emotional turmoil.

“People think if they're not doing bargaining after denial that somehow they've got it the wrong way,” says Julia. “Of course, we can feel all of those things in a day. You can have moments of acceptance, you can have moments of fury, you can have moments of denial, all within half an hour.”

So there’s no one route through the hurt. But after decades of counselling grieving people, Julia has found a number of strategies that can help. She’s called these her eight “pillars of strength”.

Creating a relationship with the dead. The love we have for a person doesn’t die with them. It can - and should - continue to be a positive presence in our lives. Julia says it’s helpful to find ways to maintain links someone we’ve lost – perhaps by wearing their ring or watch, or visiting a place you associate with them, or by planting a tree or dedicating a bench in their honor.

Be a friend to yourself. As with many emotionally-charged moments in our lives, the experience of grief can prompt us to be incredibly self-critical. We can get upset with ourselves for crying too much, or not being able to return to work right away. Julia points to the self-compassion advice of Kristin Neff, saying you should “love yourself as if you were a friend” - and a good friend would never get mad at you for grieving.

Express and explore your emotions. Julia stresses the chaos of the feelings that make up grief. And each of these emotions is trying to tell us something different. We may feel anger, fear and sorrow – but by sitting with these emotions we can better understand our grief. For example, you may feel anger that a life partner has died; may fear the financial implications of the death; and may be deeply sad about not having that person around. Letting each of these feelings speak will help in unpicking the complexities of grief.

Give yourself time. Bereavement by its very nature is going to be a strain which consumes our emotional and mental energies. Don’t rush (or be rushed) into decisions. And don’t be tempted to create a timescale to return to “normalcy.” It’s also a good idea not to benchmark your grief against others. Remember this isn’t a test or competition.

Know your limits. Going through grief effectively means there are things you may not want to or be able to do. And that’s ok. Julia says it can be as simple as dreading a visit to the store for groceries, or accepting a friend’s invitation to see a movie. Go easy on yourself and do what you can when you are ready.

Take Care of Your Body. As I say time and again, moving your body is great for your wellbeing. At a time of emotional turmoil this is truer than ever. We can also regulate how our body feels with our breath. A time of loss is a great time to return to a breath-based meditation practice so you can at least one way to get back into the present moment.

Adopt some structure and good habits. Another perennial happiness hack is to create good habits – beneficial behaviors that you can repeat in ways that give you structure. That can be daily exercise, but Julia also says it can be building into your diary a regular time allocated to thinking about your dead loved one, or tending the tree you planted for them, or looking through a photo album. Julia says these structured reflections can help us process our loss – and make the times that grief creeps up on us randomly (when a meaningful song comes on the radio, for example) easier to bear.

Focus and be mindful. Living in the moment is a key part of living a happier life. Grief, by its very nature, encourages us to think fondly of the past – before we lost our parent, friend or lover. And given the pain of grief, it’s also tempting to try not face it in the moment – to do other things or think other thoughts or blot them out with drink or drugs. But Julia says when we allow ourselves to sit with grief we then “have the courage to endure it”.

I take a different approach to my grief. At first I was letting it destroy me until I stopped and thought about how my beautiful angel lived life and how he NEVER wanted his momma to be sad. That's when I stopped dwelling on the pain and started trying to live a happy life. Cody would want me to be happy. Cody would want me to laugh and smile and spread kindness, so that is what I do. I am living for my child even though he is not psychically with me, he will always be with me! I love you Cody! by Maggie Myrick

Let’s take it easy any not pressure ourselves to be one way or the other for now.

Even in winter camellias still bloom. Let’s not let grief blind us to the collateral beauty around us🙏🏼🙏🏽🙏🏾

Use the strength from your pain because it is POWERFUL 💥