Scarlet Inks

I wonder if the bad things that happened in ny surroundings were caused by me
I seem to attract lots of negative energy
I always blame myself when bad things happen and I'm around

I'm pathetic aren't I?
Always cheering up other people
but always wallow myself in pity,
harbor guilt of things that happened that wasn't even my fault to begin with.

Am I really a bad luck?
Perhaps I am.
I ain't a ray of sunshine, or streaks of rainbow,
I'm a midnight rain afterall.

-Scarlet Rain | (untitled)

One time, someone told me that I'm a free spirit
I'm glad to know that they see me as a free spirited girl
but deep inside I beg to disagree
I ain't a free spirit at all

I'm just a broken soul, a scarred one
who tries to move forward, to keep going
despite those shackles that holds me
I just keep on going in my own clumsy way.

Instead I'd rather say I'm a brave spirit
I have to move, to free myself from my shackles
to free myself from those ghosts,
remnants of my painful, traumatic memories.

I'd say I'm brave despite being constantly scared of the world,
the world that is outside my safe haven
that I am brave enough to face my fears
I am brave enough to shed some tears.

That I am brave for facing the world that scares me
for trying my hardest to conquer and wander around the uncommon world,
and brave enough for not listening to those whispers of the grim reaper I call my ghosts
brave enough to keep standing, and keep on moving.

-Scarlet Rain | A brave soul

Don't force yourself to love
Let love bloom on it's own

-Scarlet

She wrote pieces of life, of love, of pain, of suffering, and even death.
She wrote with her tears, her wounds, her scars, and her blood.
She wrote poetries of love, and the feeling of being in love, but never wrote about being loved.
She wrote about those butterflies in the hollow of her chest, of her stomach, and how it died untold, unappreciated, unrequited.
She wrote about the feathers in the skies, about how wonderful it was to fly, and the feeling to fall, and drown in the depths of the ocean, and her own tears.
She wrote about the sunshines, and it's rays, and even the rainbows.
She wrote about the rain, the heavy clouds, the kisses of the rain, the hugs of the cold air, and the way she danced in the pain.
She wrote the pain she shared with the rain, the starry nights, the dark corners of her room.
She wrote about the beautiful stars in the skies, and moon, and the sun, the eclipse, and midnight black starless, moonless sky.
She wrote about nature, about life, about death, and in between life and death.
She wrote everything untold, unheard.
She wrote her cries, her pleas, her screams, her dreams, her silent whispers in the dark.

-Scarlet | She wrote poetries

Luckily, I survived the day without hurting myself, thanks to my Lily. She resembles a lot of my baby Panther who knows when I'm sad or down.

I am happy for my friends who finally graduated now, after enduring those four long and torturous years. But sometimes, I can't help pity myself. I can't help myself wondering what if I was one of them.

You know, sobrang conflicted ako sa sarili ko eh. Yung feeling na proud ka sa mga kaibigan mo, pero hindi mo mapigilang masaktan para sa sarili mo kasi sobrang unfair ng buhay. Ayos lang sakin na mahirap lang kami, ayos lang, kasi magagawan naman ng paraan ang problema sa pera eh. Pero kasi hindi lang pera ang problema, yung health ko mismo. Ang unfair lang na, wala man lang akong kalaban laban nang puntiryahin ng tadhana ang pinaka-kahinaan ko. Hindi ko magawang makapalag, at wala akong ibang magawa kung hindi ang bitawan ang pangarap ko. Sobrang sakit to the point na pakiramdam ko masisiraan ako ng bait. Ni hindi ko nga magawang sabihin sa mga magulang ko na iyon talaga ang pinakadahilan kung bakit ako tumigil kasi panigurado mag-aalala na naman sila. Kotang-kota na ako na maging alalahanin nila eh, mula pagkabata ko pa palagi nalang akong dumadagdag sa problema. Wala na nga kaming makain, dumadagdag pa ang sakit ko.

Ang unfair lang, wala akong ibang magawa kung hindi ang magmukmok sa gilid, iiyak ang lahat para maibsan ang sakit.

Yun lang naman, haha skl.

Dito na siguro ako magra-rant? Char

In the middle of the night
You filled my head with the thoughts of you
It always happen that I sometimes wonder if it's all right
To imagine scenarious of the future with you

Funny right? You are all in the past
Yet here I am, waiting for you to come back
You were the poetry I should have not written
But here I am, grabbing my pen and write about you again.

It was a continuous cycle that it suffocates me
I wanted to escape from your ghost and love freely
But you keep haunting me even in my sleep
Please stop this for you are not mine to keep

-Scarlet | Thoughts of you

Messy.
Chaotic.
Everything is out of order.
Echoes of unknown voices.
Screams and pleas.
It's noisy.
There I was in the middle
of that chaotic little world,
covering my ears,
crying myself while hugging my knees,
pleading for someone to stop those voices.
And there came a girl,
wearing the same face as me,
having those same dull eyes,
but in her lips plastered a smile.
She extended her arms for me to reach,
telling me to hold on to her and be brave.
And then I heard her sang a song,
with her voice filled with determination
in the midst of uncertainty.
A song that tells me to move forward
because she got my back,
that I'm never alone in my track.
And that girl is me,
the other persona that lies within me.
Giving me courage,
telling me to keep moving
because the end was still so long,
that I can rest, and I can pause
but never give up on chasing the stars.

-Scarlet | (;)

It's not easy dreaming of something big and high when you can't afford sending yourself to a unversity.
It's not easy going into a prestigious university chasing your dreams when your rival was your financial status.
It's not easy chasing your dreams when you know how hard it was to find money.
You see? Dreams are for dreamers. But turning those dreams to reality are for those lucky enough to afford chasing their dreams.
Some might double or triple their hardwork just to achieve the dream they are trying to reach, but what about those unlucky enough to work hard? What about those dreamers who health are fragile?

Dreams are for dreamers, but not everyone could turn those dreams into reality.

-Scarlet | Dreams are for dreamers

Dear youth,

Life is tough but it doesn't mean it wouldn't get any better. A day could be a bad day, and another day could be a good one.

Pain is inevitable, you will stumble and fall, get wounds and scars. You will shed tears, get yourself a broken heart, but that's life. You just have to be tougher, braver, and stronger to get through it all. You just have to have the courage to stand up when you slipped and fell on your knees. Life is tough, but you are tougher.

Pain is inevitable, and it's okay to shed tears. Just remember to wipe it off afterwards. It's okay to get hurt. It's okay to grieve over a broken heart, to cry over different problems that may come knocking at your door. It’s okay to rest when you feel tired, just remember to get up and continue the long walk ahead of you. It's okay not to be okay sometimes. You are human being afterall.

Just don't forget that, life maybe tough, the world might be harsh, but there are still lot of beautiful things that this world could offer. Go get up and find yourself some peace, find your safe haven and rest your tired heart. Run in the meadows, feel the gentle wind, or enjoy the splashing waters in the river and falling water from the waterfalls. Go enjoy the pouring rain, or the rainbows and the rays of sunshine after the pain. Enjoy the beauty of the sun and the sky as the sun sets, or feel the salty breeze of the air beside the sea. Feel the sand tickling your feet or the waves of the sea at the seashore. Go out and stare at the starry night, and fell in love with the beauty of the moon and the stars as you let the cold wind embrace you.

You see, life is tough, the world is harsh, but there are things in this world, beautiful things it could offer for us to breath, to relax, to enjoy, to love, and a safe place for us to rest.

-Scarlet

Nginang yan dapat kasi Scarlet Rain na ginawa kong page eh hahaha

Ay page pa pala 'to?