Human with Helena

The fabulous Art of Consent has a spectacular new website! (link in the comments)

Check it out, book us for all your consent-related needs, and stay consensual baby! 🥰

I'm teaching consent for several groups of undergrads and postgrads here in Cambridge next month, with the delightful Rupert James and Art of Consent.

The paradigm shift of focusing on consent is life-changing. But it can be hard to know where to start in uncovering our authentic, empowered capacity to consent and not consent.

In our workshops, we'll focus on the importance of mindfulness, and learning to notice how you really feel about things (ideas, requests, interactions, touch...) When we get out of mental scripts about what we think we want, we touch the real experience of feeling and knowing what's good and what's off. A perfunctory "yes" is not consent. Relating with consent is a living, breathing game, that renews itself in each moment we notice and value ourselves and our intimate others. It's deeply satisfying. When we get in the habit of it, we won't want to settle for less.

Did you think about consent when you were 18? If you met the person you were then, what questions would you ask? What would you pay more attention to if you could do it all again?

Come to the London screening of this new film about Tamera! There's a q&a with the filmmakers, and it will be a great place to meet people interested in regenerative community, post-capitalism, non-monogamy, system change, authentic relating, mutual support etc etc. If you're in London on Friday 29th, come!

I remember watching from the sidelines as the film was made... it's quite nostalgic watching the trailer. I'm hoping I might be in the background somewhere 😁

The Village of Lovers - Official Trailer 2023 Global Tour On Now. See screenings https://thevillageoflovers.com/tourA Film By Ian MacKenzie, John Wolfstone & Julia MaryanskaTrailer Editors Jordan Baese &...

- The Sexy Circle -
June 23

I was thrilled by the Sexy Circle last month. We're going to do it again, on June 23rd at 7pm in Lewisham.

Come and practise mindful relating with us, and together let's explore what Sexy feels like, for real, here and now.

There's no need to do anything but circle in this circle - and - your erotic body is invited to come along for the ride. You can even mention it out loud, with your mouth words (if you want.)

The link to book is in the comments.

Join me this Tuesday for 🐳 Exploring Erotic Ground 🦬

[part of the online Erotic Embodiment series at the Institute of Somatic Sexology]

Tuesday 13th at 11pm BST (that's 8am AEST or 4pm MST.)

I'll offer a solo practice of erotic discovery, adapting the forms of the Ritual Play practice by Marina Kronkvist. Our “play partner” will be the ground itself. We’ll explore our erotic body in a dynamic way, standing, sitting, lying on the ground, in relation with gravity, with touch, movement, breath and stillness. How does your body meet the ground today?

If you would like to play with the ground, make sure you have a good-sized floorspace to play in, preferably the area of a double bed or larger. If your body cannot (or doesn’t want to) lie/sit on the ground, we will find adaptations.

The ISS erotic embodiment class is a communal practice project held by Uma Furman. It's donation-based, just pay what you can afford.

Sign up here:
https://instituteofsomaticsexology.com/.../erotic-embodiment

We're getting circle-y tonight at 7pm in Lewisham.

The theme will be Sexy. What is Sexy like? How does Sexy feel? Is Sexy doing ok? Has anyone spoken to Sexy recently? 🧐

(See link in comments to book)

I'm running two public circles in the next few months: Relating in Reality is in Lewisham on Tuesday May 30 and on Tuesday June 20. See the comment for the link to book a place.

I’ll be at Desire and Intimacy - A Conscious Sexuality Festival for the Under 40’s at Osho Leela from May 25-29, as part of their Dynamic Care Team.

The festival offers a variety of workshops designed to support you to embrace pleasure and intimacy, play and build on what you want for yourself within your consent and boundaries.

You will have plenty of opportunities to tune into your desires and needs in every moment, all while feeling nourished and supported by the loving community we will create together. With so much on offer, you will have the chance to choose what feels useful for you and explore your interests at your own pace.

I will be there as part of the Dynamic Care Team, a network of highly trained and experienced individuals, working together to create a net of care and radical support for this festival. I'm looking forward to meeting lots of new and old friends, and enjoying the first days of summer in the West Country.

Click here for details and to book a place:
https://osholeela.uk/event/desire-intimacy-under-40s-festival/

- Circling Evolution Thursday Group -

The Circling Evolution Thursday Group is a closed online circling group on Thursdays 19:30-21:00 BST. It’s intimate, experimental, affordable and inclusive.

New members are welcome to join a fresh cohort on the first Thursday of each month.

The groups costs £40 for one month – that’s 6 hours of closed group circling (or 7.5 hours when the month has five Thursdays).

The facilitation is a call-and-response collab between Enrique Fernandez, Nayma Genin, Christine Jee and me. I think our unique styles can all be elided as different shades of “loving-ness.” Whether you’re new to circling or experienced, come and be welcome just as you are, practise bathing your world in attention, and build skills to deepen any connection.

Interested in joining us in May?
Email [email protected] to sign up, or you can message me any questions

This image, “Silver Lining” by Tim O’Brien, reminds me of online circles. It’s different to circling in-person. Sometimes it’s like a river pouring in through a crack in the wallpaper, gleaming with reflections of an otherworld, flooding my landscape with freshness, bringing provocations of unexpected dimensions, leaving me renewed and re-confronted, like a stranger in a familiar land.

On Monday I'm teaching my first online Erotic Embodiment class for the Institute of Somatic Sexology 😊

Join me for a class on the connections between the jaw, neck and eroticism. We will explore the intricate entanglement of our jaws and necks with the whole of the rest of our bodies, including our pelvis, and our breath.

Through self-touch, explorative breathing and placement of awareness, we will investigate the liveliness in the jaw-neck, and venture into new erotic self-entanglements from within this area of the body.

The ISS erotic embodiment class is a communal practice project held by Uma Furman. It's donation-based - just pay what you can afford.

Here's the thing: it's at 11pm BST (i.e. in the UK)... that's 8am AEST or 4pm MST.

For more info and to sign up to receive the Zoom link, please see:
https://instituteofsomaticsexology.com/courses/erotic-embodiment

🥳🧡🤸‍♂️

The Hackney circle is today at 7pm! To book see the link in the comments.

The theme will be earth-ing. 🌍 Here's a photo of some spontaneous tree-ing in a recent circle.

This is my last circle in Hackney for a month or so - there are no Hackney circles in May. Watch out for more circles in Croydon soon, starting with a Croydon circle this Monday (May 1st).

There's still time to come Circling tonight in Lewisham at 7pm. The theme will be "Being with the Other in their World".

Buy tickets – Circling: Relating in Reality, Thu 27 Apr 2023 7:00 PM - 10:00 PM Circling: Relating in Reality, Thu 27 Apr 2023 - Circling: Relating in Reality Circling is a relational mindfulness practise. It’s a chance to show up as the real you, while getting more and more intentional about how you relate with others. You can explore what feels most exciting, good, true and...

I'm leading two circles this week:

Relating in Reality in Lewisham, Thursday 7pm
Developmental Lab in Hackney, Friday 7pm

Please check the comments for links to both events. Thanks to Ksenia Belash for this photo from a recent circle 🌟

Next weekend I'm leading this weekend on Wheel of Consent, for intermediate explorers. The erotic side of life will be present in our consciousness, and we’ll invite it to show up in the room - in an authentic, consensual, mindful and gentle way. We’ll use movement, consent exercises, non-verbal play, and self-reflection, as we peek into our desires and boundaries, and wonder at how we want to relate to them. It’s a space to explore our aliveness, to come away nourished and more alive for the fun side of life.

Adam Wilder and I will encourage the group to slow down, to find just the right exploration, that lets the creaturey body of each person feel relaxed, present and safe. There'll be a lot of playfulness and space to make each exercise your own.

This event is queer-friendly and gender-affirming. Whatever type of erotic energy is your jam, and however you identify, you are so welcome, and your desires and boundaries are beautiful.

And if on the day you don't feel much erotic energy at all, no problemo! You can use this workshop to explore desires and boundaries in whatever dimension truly interests you!

Hopefully you will come away with new consent skills that you can use with friends or partners, on dates, and actually in all your relationships, erotic and non-erotic. It's an underwear-on event, and it's all based on the Wheel of Consent. That means that your way of participating might be witnessing from the sofa and taking care of yourself - all weekend - and that's great.

If you've done some work on consent or conscious sexuality before, you're so welcome in this space. This is a workshop for people who are starting to have an embodied sense of their own boundaries, or are already practising thinking and feeling into consent.

If that's not you yet, (hi! nice to meet you!) please get in touch to learn about our fundamentals of consent workshops.

Message me if you're on the fence, or would like to understand more to work out if it's right for you. There’s scholarship available, so please do get in touch if you’re interested and it feels unaffordable.

See more details at the link in the comments.

May the consent be with you! 🦄

{photo thanks to Stephan Valentin on Unsplash}

This time next week (Friday 24th), I'll be preparing for a special circle in Hackney. The magical photographer Ksenia Belash will join us to capture the circle on camera.

Ksenia took this photo of me and Enrique at one of their circling retreats with Ranjit last year. She took my profile photo too, and almost all my favourite photos of myself. She's a wonderful circling facilitator, and her photography is a kind of space-holding - really sensitive, gentle and humourous. Her photos lift the beauty out of circling in an amazing way.

If anybody doesn't want to be in the photos, that will be totally respected. You are welcome to join us and stay totally off camera. (I can often get anxious or have a shame attack when I'm being photographed.) If you don't want a photo of yourself to be made public, after it's been taken, we will completely respect that.

If you're on the fence, you might like to give it a try. Being photographed while circling offers a new perspective on the unique way you are showing up. And it's a chance to circle with the wonderful Ksenia 😊

The link for the event is in the comments.

My circles with the Temples of Eros community are now monthly! 🐳

The next one is in two weeks:
Tuesday March 28th, 7-10pm
near St John's/Lewisham (London SE8)

Come and get relateful in a welcoming, accessible, sx-positive community. Everyone is welcome; please message me if you have any questions.

https://www.tickettailor.com/events/rebeltantra/876366?fbclid=IwAR0BLO0YUcypga924GT83dPkodchrhf8Li9HJlVZQOW-jR4FuI2QvipgpGg

Buy tickets – Circling: Relating in Reality, Tue 28 Mar 2023 7:00 PM - 10:00 PM Circling: Relating in Reality, Tue 28 Mar 2023 - Circling: Relating in Reality Circling is a relational mindfulness practise. It’s a chance to show up as the real you, while getting more and more intentional about how you relate with others. You can explore what feels most exciting, good, true and...

Wheel of Consent weekend with me and Adam, in less than two weeks.

Do you want to feel more at ease and at home in your body?

- learn how to ask for what you want, without making others feel uncomfortable or resentful
- practise noticing and setting boundaries in a firm, clear, and skilful way, so you can take the space you deserve in life
- enjoy a safer space to experiment with relating more deliberately, and trying out different types of touch
- work out what you actually like, and how touch actually feels, outside of what you think you should want or enjoy
- enjoy plenty of space and time to digest difficult emotions around boundaries, touch and making requests
- get playful and experiment with asking for things you've never experienced before

We can't wait to get consensual with you.

Link to book in the comments.

In this picture are Adam Wilder and Helena Laughton playfully preparing to teach our next wheel of consent weekend in London on 25-26 March (link in bio).

Playfulness is an important value for us, especially when we host workshops that can touch deep emotions.

Playfulness helps attendees to feel at ease and relaxed.

Playfulness helps us to laugh at the genius and hilarious strategies we create as humans to avoid discomfort.

Playfulness helps give us perspective, how often do we focus all our energy on one thing which in the greater scheme of things is inconsequential.

Erotic Embodiment classes online 🥳‍🌊✨

I'm going to be teaching Erotic Embodiment online with the Institute of Somatic Sexology, starting April 11.

The EE classes have been run online by Uma Furman and her team of facilitators for years. Cultivate your embodiment, practise finding curiosity and joy in your body, and build erotic mindfulness - in a safe and simple way, in the comfort of your own home, in community. And it's totally by donation!

To sign up, please see the link in the comments.

This is what the Institute of Somatic Sexology says about EE class:

"Erotic Embodiment classes are group online classes where we learn communally about connecting with the body and accessing more of your internal resources.

We harness the elements of breath work, movement, touch, sound and placement of awareness to build your pleasure potential. We work together to create both structured practices and improvised ones, exploring different themes each class.

These circles are both learning and practice spaces. You do not need to have any previous experience to participate and you can participate to your comfort level. Being an online class, there is the added element of choice whether you would like to be on screen or off screen at times. This will be a clothing optional event."

I'm making a change to my regular drop-in circles:

I'll keep leading a circle every two weeks. It will be in Hackney and in Croydon on rotation. In other words: one circle in Hackney and one circle in Croydon each month.

I've put up the price of my regular circle, so I can meet costs better. If you need a cheaper ticket, just ask. I want you to come!

The next Hackney circle is March 24th. See the comments for a link to the events in Hackney.

Dates for Croydon are coming soon! Let me know if you are interested and have opinions about the dates you prefer.

I really love leading regular drop-in circling nights. I'm also thinking about leading some different types of circling spaces soon, like closed groups, and circling combined with other frameworks and practices.

Looking forward to this Wheel of Consent weekend. I'm assisting the delightful Adam Wilder. Come and cultivate your sovereignty, practise asking what for what you /really/ want, and learn how to empower your loved ones to do the same.

March 25-26 in London
Book here:
https://www.togetherness.com/wheel-of-consent-weekend