Gallant Boy Akinlade

Do you know 'a lighted candle can light thousand of candles without shortage in its lifespan.💯💯
Doing good give you no harm🌱🌱

Happy birthday
Dear mother Nigeria
🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹

With the statue those short people get😏😏
Are you still sure they too fall in love 🤔🤔🤔
Because am thinking they always climb in love🥴🥴🥴

If nothing should be done, then something must be done😶😶😶😶

Teacher: solve it the classwork isn't hard
Assignment: two zero two four
Option: (a) 2024. (b) 0044. (c)0024 (d)2044
Me: 🥴🥴🥴🥴🥴🥴🙄🙄🙄

As a Nigerian do you have a Nigeria flag in your house or i should face front 🙄🙄🙄🙄

I must be there when God what to judge all this nepa.🥴🥴🥴🥴
Because simple instruction 'let there be light' dem no hear.🤦🤦🤦🤦

Anybody wey use cold water bath this morning na confirm cultist 😎😎
🥴🥴🥴🥴

Biology teacher: what is the opposite of antibacterial?
Me: unclebacteria
🥴🥴🥴🥴🥴

Please how do those rich people who have plenty of fruit in fridge have peace of mind self
Am coming... Let me go and check the fridge incase of rat am coming
🥴🥴🥴🥴🥴🥴🥴🥴

Always say a prayer before you sleep
🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏

Don't give the devil room in your life, relationship, family 🙏🙏🙏
Happy Sunday to you all
💯💯💯💯💯💯

I met a girl I liked back in 2012 in Uniport in an elective course.
She was an instant crush, it was love at first sight for me. I spent days and nights living in the fantasy of what being with her would be like. Suddenly I was looking forward to the class I shared with her yet I never manned up to speak to her.
She was too beautiful for me, I had told myself. There was a realist in me, a bird on my shoulder telling me the hard truth. She was probably dating a very rich, cute guy and if she wasn't, there were better guys asking her out and I'd never even come close. The truth is not always bitter.
I knew I would never hold her soft hands, give her warm hugs, kiss her soft lips or share a pillow with her. But I couldn't stop dreaming. Dreams were all I had.
So I spent the remainder of my years in school dreaming about her, my heart would stop whenever I ran into her in school, my breathing would increase, I would be speechless. This girl didn't even know my name or if I existed. But I didn't care. In my head, she was mine and yet I knew it was not a valid dream.
I found her on Facebook in my final year and sent a request. We began to exchange messages, each time she replied me it felt like she did me a favour similar to paying my school fees. It felt like a privilege. This was the girl I'd been in love with for years man. I didn't care. The big question for me, should I ask her out? She'd obviously say no and my heart would be broken and I wouldn't be able to dream again. So I left the thought and became friends with her instead.
We turned out to be great friends. Even better than I expected and it felt so good that the love of my life was now a good friend. She would tell me everything and anything, about the guy she's dating and how their dates went. I was jealous but I dared not show it. Love is for fools really.
I would patiently wait for her to see the love in my eyes and realise that nobody would love her like I did. I was willing to. Even if it took a lifetime of deception. Her relationship fell apart soon to my joy. I had assumed I was the best suited to take the role, I had assumed I was number one on the list to replace him. I gave her time to heal then one day I got really drunk first (it was a necessary prerequisite) and confessed my feelings to her and how I've been in love with her for 4 years. I no longer wanted to keep dreaming, I wanted this more than anything else in the world.
There was a long silence between both of us, she walked out on me. I assumed the shock was too much for her. We didn't speak for days. When she finally returned my call she had already agreed to be with another guy who of course seemed more promising than me, a broke prospective corp member like her with lots of invalid dreams.
I swallowed it with pain. She offered me back to the chair of being her best friend and I turned it down with tears. I wanted more. I thought I deserved better. It was a painful goodbye.
1 year later, I ran into her somewhere in town looking as beautiful as ever. One year of hurt had passed, she still had that charming smile that could melt the anger of a Nigerian soldier. We got talking again and this time she was single.
This time she wanted to give me a chance. This time she wanted to be my girlfriend. She wanted to hold my hands, she wanted to kiss me, she wanted to share a pillow with me. My dream of 5 years was in front of me waiting to become a reality. But what did I do?
I turned her down because she has small breasts.

Master bj: what is my name
Me: Mr Bolaji
Master bj: why do you now write blow job
Me: 😎😎🥴🥴🥴🥴

Favour😏
Don't ever talk to me again😩😩
Why will you be sweeping and use one hand to cover your breast 😎😎😎
Why!🥴🥴🥴

God i know say na me talk say i wan hustle buy benz this 2021
But for now please put benz aside😩😩
I feel see beans there my body dey shake.🥴🥴🥴

Just ordinary argument you dey cry😏😏
And you wan become a lawyer 🙄🙄
My sister ya craze🤫🤫🤫

Some girls can just play with there life o😩😩
Robbers: everybody down😠😠
Slaymama: i cannot knee down am wearing white 🙆🙆
Ladies why🤦🤦

When crossing the road
White: 👬🚶⛹️
Nigeria: if that car first me reach that pole make i die🏃🏃🏃🏃🏃🏃🏃
😅😂🤣🤣😂😂
My people ya valid

Me. Mum gas has finish
Mum. Why won't it finish, when you are pressing phone 🤦🤦🤦

O dear God 🙏
May those people who crush on me see this elephant 🐕 as dog
😁😆

Charles is this not village people 😥😥
You don dey use soap inside river and forget incantation🤦🤦
Why na😭😭
And you call yourself a yahoo boy🙆🙆

Hello my muslim fans🙇🙇
If you wan break, i dey sell fruit o🙄
One road no enter market o😂🤣
Even i get the fruit Adam and Eve chop self😎😎

Favour why na🤦
Which one is your Dad has a shoe repair company😞😞
Just say your Dad is a cobbler🤷🤷
Simple🚶🚶🚶🚶

Favour 😏
It is long sleeve not long slim🤦
🚶🚶

You owe me money
You rush join soldier, why you no pay before joining 😭😭
Charles, my God is a revengeful God o 😥😥

Wait Favour ✋
Why you come bring your friend come visit me 😩😩
Why na😭😭😭

Na America i choose as 1st choice and South Korea as 2nd💯
But that blue angel change both to Nigeria😥😥😥
Angel Gabriel please investigate o😭😭

Favour why na😭😭😭
Because you see my d*ck now you dey talk say you no dey do underage
My God is a revengeful God o😥😥

God why na😭😭
You no tell me say my crush na le***an na😩😩😩😩

This favour self💁💁
You tell me say make i attack you with my favorite artist and you defend with his song
I said 1da banton😁😁😁
And you said make i f**kup😭😭😭

Please I want a relationtokunbo all this ship no dey last, them dey sink

Please I want a relationtokunbo all this ship no dey last, them dey sink😭😭😭

Don't cry when you don't see people you love
Because their word will never leave
Because emotionally they will be with you till the end
Because they love you too

I may look fine and undisturbed
But deep down i want to be loved
I want to have someone who will be my comfort zone
But am afraid if I find one it may not last😥
😭😭😭😭😭😭

If I don't heard about you i won't care🥰🥰
If you are not next to me i won't think about you every time🧘🧘
If I don't see you i won't fall in love😞😞😞
If you are not so good to me i won't blink an eye😩😩
But here I am loving you and you are gone 😥😥