Artsy Fartsy Art House

An Important Message from Uncle Artsy:

Lord, deliver me from the need to respond to every tom fool comment strangers make on social media.

©2024jml

An Important Message from Uncle Artsy:

The 21st century needs a serious reboot.

©2024jml

An Important Message from Uncle Artsy:

Hey, Palestine, while I’m thinking about it, look at me. Palestine, look at me. Esau made a bad deal. Get over it.

©2024jml

An Important Message from Uncle Artsy:

Reverse racism is still racism.

©2024jml

Tax Day: The gift that keeps on taking.

An Important Message from Uncle Artsy:

Doctor: “I'm afraid you only have 10 years to live.”
Earth: “That’s what you said 40 years ago.”
Doctor: “This time I mean it."
Earth: “That’s what you said 40 years ago.”

©2024jm

An Important Message from Uncle Artsy:

The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world that it's acceptable to go out in public in your pajamas.

©2024jml

Thank you, Jesus. No one could do what you did. 🌹💟✝️

An Important Message from Uncle Artsy:

The total population of Earth is now 8.1 billion. That’s a lot of people. I don’t see any alternative, some of y’all got to go.

©2024jml

An Important Message from Uncle Artsy:

George Orwell was from the future.

©2024jml

An Important Message from Uncle Artsy:

I feel like a Roman in the 5th century, looking around, going, “What in the ever lovin’ hell has happened to our Republic?”

©2024jml

Order your copy(ies) from Amazon. https://www.amazon.com/Previously-JMichael-Leonard-Seasons/dp/B0CXJ998SH/ref=sr_1_1?crid=1I87IWWAIYJJ3&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.PYa3Gc4U-ybAzBMj1E0PZ9pbdwr9QjLGfb7UpnNAbSfGjHj071QN20LucGBJIEps.8qgfdoeeemLqGzkkWtQWkL_PTvTlykPKPHDiMn7kQAE&dib_tag=se&keywords=previously%2C+on+michael+leonard&qid=1710249798&sprefix=%2Caps%2C69&sr=8-1

An Important Message from Uncle Artsy:

New book: “How To Talk Like An Academic for Dummys.” Learn the arcane secrets of there-their-they’re, to-too-two, and idea-ideal. Dare to correctly pronounce words like “boatswain,” and “cachet.” Become the bard of the faculty lounge. Order now.

©2024jml

An Important Message from Uncle Artsy:

I always enjoy the first spring of winter when everything blooms so beautifully and brings the promise of warm weather. Of course, then winter returns and kills everything. But second spring is right around the corner and the blooms will return. Only to be killed once more by third winter. But take heart, my dears, for third spring will be waiting in the wings. Of course, fourth winter will be waiting in the wings, too, with a heavy snowfall or maybe an ice storm. The groundhog said this will continue until one or the other cries uncle. And if the groundhog didn’t say that, he should have.

©2024jml

An Important Message from Uncle Artsy:

You know if it sounds like a duck, if it quacks like a duck, don't assume it's a duck. It could be a fart. The two can sound remarkably similar.

©2024jml

Every day's Valentine's Day with my brown-eyed girl. 🌹💘

Thank you, my dears, for all the b’day greetings and such. Particularly those I haven’t seen in a while. Group hug. Another looping carnival ride around the calendar, and here it is February again, and as always, beloved, I’ve never been this old before. And neither have you. BUT! And I say BUT! The best part is it’s time to announce the lucky winner of this year’s coveted Golden Party Hat. This award is given annually to the first person who wishes me a Happy B’day.

So without further ado, this year’s winner of the Golden Party Hat, the person who was first with good tidings of b’day cheer, coming in at 1:14 a.m. on the morning of Feb. 3rd, is – ta’daaa – Robert Stanley Bean! YAYYY! Congratulations, sir. Bask in it.

Because Marsha Leonard loves me and wants only the best for my b'day, she whipped up a fave for breakfast: Eggs Benedict with good ol' BACON bacon (as opposed to that Canadian stuff). Life be good up in here, my dears. Livin' is easy, fish are jumpin' and the cotton is high. 😎

An Important Message from Uncle Artsy:

Punxsutawney Phil the groundhog stuck his head out of his burrow, did not see his shadow, and said: “I predict an early spring.”

Medesdo Manny the prairie dog stuck his head out of his burrow, did not see his shadow, and said: “I predict Prince Harry will be bald by autumn.”

Sandstone Samuel the big brown bat stuck his head out of his burrow, did not see his shadow and said: “I predict September will come before June this year.”

Then Winnetonka W***y the grub worm took time to remind everyone that prognostication by animals is not an exact science.

©2024jml

Mama found this thing in a closet yesterday, hadn't been opened. This morning when I got in the shower, I felt like I was in a screen saver. 🧜‍♀️🧜🧜‍♂️

An Important Message from Uncle Artsy:

If you sing to your food, re-examine your life.

©2024jml

A fire broke out backstage in a theatre. The clown came out to warn the public; they thought it was a joke and applauded. He repeated it; the acclaim was even greater. I think that's just how the world will come to an end: to general applause from wits who believe it's a joke. ~ Søren Kierkegaard

So this is what happens when you have more than one pair of house shoes and you slip them on in the dark. 😎

An Important Message from Uncle Artsy:

A couple of things. First, if it’s your birthday, don’t say it’s another trip around the sun. You’re not a planet. Just say how many years old you are and leave it. Secondly, stop saying “if you know, you know.” If I know, of course I know, I don’t need to be told that. And if I don’t know, I still won’t know, so who are you talking to? And that applies to “iykyk” as well. Please tell a friend.

©2024jml