Carole Diane Coaching

Homophobia, biphobia, transphobia, q***rphobia, enbyphobia, acephobia, arophobia, cisheteronormativity, amatonormativity, monos*xism, compulsory s*xuality, s*xism, misogyny, ableism, racism, colourism, white supremacy, colonialism... They really are all interconnected.

I picked this quote because I can relate to it so much. The way that all of them work together to reinforce and maintain the oppressive status quo makes so much sense when we zoom out from just looking at how a specific community is affected.
This has great implications considering the intersectionality of identities which occur within all of our communities. Q***r people of all different skin colours exist. Misogyny affects women, enbies, agender people and gay men. Disability shows up across all of these groups. I could go on but the important thing to take away from it is that when we are fighting against oppression, we are all fighting the same fight no matter what our marginalised identities are.

🏳️‍🌈 *xualproblems ***anstruggles

It took me a long time, or that's how it feels, to be comfortable being visible. Now that I am, however, I really see being visible as an important part of how I can contribute to making things better for other q***r people.

What being visible means to me is being unapologetically me in all my polyam, agender, ace-spec, bi, kinky glory. I talk about q***r issues, get excited to take part in the protest energy of pride marches, relish the opportunity to contribute to the community feel of pride festivals. I am very outspoken at times about how the mental health and coaching spheres pay too little attention to the needs of anyone who doesn't fit into the cisheteronormativity they're based on.

Being visible also requires me to be spending time exploring at the edge of my comfort zone and familiarity because I have grown up in an imperfect world and I have some work to do with regards to dismantling my internalised biases and complicity with systemic power imbalances. One of the most prominent for me is ableism with a significant focus on my internalised ableism (I am disabled and I can be really harsh to myself for the things I can't do). Others are racism & colourism - I see these playing out in the q***r and kink spaces and I'm working on being better myself because I do have privilege here.

I didn't have people being visibily q***r in my orbit as I grew up and I received some pretty awful comments as well as treatment as a q***r kid. Being visible is important to me because I know what it's like when no one around is like you or knows how to be with you.

*xuallivesmatter *xuallife *xualspectrum ***anuk ***rvisibilty

This quote by Audre Lorde "When I dare to be powerful, to use my strength in the service of my vision, then it becomes less and less important whether I am afraid" really speaks to what I have been seeing with some of the people I work with. The more they are aware of and striving towards their vision, their wishes and desires for their life, the more they are able to take fear in their stride.
I am in awe of the progress they've made. It's such a testament to them that they're able to use their strength and their personal power when they have come from crushing depression or suffocating burnout.

This is available to all of us when we have the right support and guidance. Getting that support and guidance can make a huge difference when compared to trying to do this on our own. We are limited by our own inner critics and unhelpful thoughts/beliefs which means we benefit from working with someone else to reach this place of daring to be powerful, use our strength and pursue our vision for our life

🏳️‍🌈

For clarity, I stand with the oppressed Palestinian people, Congolese people, Sudanese people, people of Tigray and the many other oppressed peoples in the world today.

I haven't posted anything to my grid/profile on this before and I know that for some the reasons won't matter. I don't want to be just another white person loudly posting solidarity etc on their business page because I don't know how much that helps. I have been loud on my personal social media and, with this profile, I have been engaging with other people's content which is bearing witness to the pain and suffering caused by violent oppressors, raising awareness of actions we can take and highlighting how Anti-Blackness and colonialism are playing out on the world stage right now. I have been reading books written by Black people on topics such as antiracism and the Black as*xual experience.

I acknowledge that I am on a journey of unlearning and learning.
Part of that journey is navigating the desire to develop my capacity to work with people in a deeper way and the need to find a decolonised approach to that deeper healing work.

I am sharing this with you now, today, because I now understand that the social media profile silence of people working with mental health on this is actively harmful as it contributes to the overall silencing of oppressed people.

Ever wondered why a psychologist or a coaching business would have a presence at Pride? I've shared my reasons in my latest article:

Why I have a presence at Pride — Carole Diane Coaching When you are not a member of the dominant group, life has additional challenges and my presence at Pride events, whether as a part of the BPS or representing my business, is hugely meaningful for me. LGBTQIA+ people and genuine allies standing up for LGBTQIA+ rights is what it’s all about. It’s ...

This is the book and approach I have been yearning for! Many thanks to for putting this out into the world

"The never-ending need to be achieving, to be putting things out into the world of value, to be fitting in, to be doing what others are doing is at odds with the very real, inescapable need to look after ourselves, to prioritise rest rather than powering through, to see ourselves as worth taking care of, even before we have done something to earn it. This is stuff that people I work with are struggling to do regardless of the label attached to their own particular difficulties and regardless of whether they see themselves as disabled or not. And, as I’ve already indicated, I am not immune to it myself."
This is an excerpt from my latest article titled Internalised Ableism: What is it? To read more, click on the link below 🙂

What is internalised ableism? — Carole Diane Coaching A look at what ableism and internalised ableism are. We also explore how ableism and internalised ableism show up in coaching and relationships. Whether you are disabled, reject the term 'disabled' for yourself, know people who are disabled or work with disabled people, this will be a good read

I've had people ask, in not so many words, what good are grounding techniques if they only help in the moment. Check out my latest article for the answer😊

"Now, going back to the suggestions of taking a walk or having a cuppa, there are ways these can be done in a manner that helps someone to ground themselves. There are also ways that same person can do them that doesn’t help them to ground, at all. As an example, you can walk round a park quite quickly, not taking in any of your surroundings, stuck in your head with all those familiar distressing thoughts and strong emotions and feel no better or even worse for it. You can also walk around the same park with a mindful energy - paying curious attention to the colours, shapes, textures, plants and animals that you see along the way."

What good are grounding techniques anyway? — Carole Diane Coaching Grounding and grounding techniques are held to be of strong importance when someone's experiencing intense emotions, distressing thoughts and dissociation. Do you know why though and how they fit in the bigger picture of emotion regulation? Find out here.

New podcast episode alert! 😃🎙
That's right, and this time we're looking at how Coco by Disney Pixar addresses the complex issue of interpersonal trauma, transgenerational trauma and healing from trauma.
My appreciation for these films does soar when I delve deeper into them. Do you experience the same?

Listen to this and other episodes on all major podcast streaming platforms, my website (www.caroledianecoaching.co.uk/podcast) or on podomatic (https://www.podomatic.com/podcasts/office55912).

Yes, my podcast, The Proud Psychologist, is back with a new episode and a renewed commitment to release new episodes on a regular basis again!

This episode looks at the Disney Pixar film Turning Red and how we can all learn valuable lessons from it on the topic of emotions and emotion regulation.

You can find today's episode on major streaming services such as Spotify, Amazon and Apple as well as here: https://www.podomatic.com/podcasts/office55912/episodes/2024-01-17T04_41_52-08_00

It's December tomorrow!! Which means it's nearly time for my first cold water 'dip' as part of my Dip A Day December Challenge to raise money for the charity PTSD UK! 😊❄️

This challenge will see me having a cold shower every day throughout December during which I will be sharing facts about PTSD, CPTSD and PTSD UK itself. You will be able to see the videos over on my Dip A Day December Challenge Instagram account over at www.instagram.com/caroledipaday23 😊❄️

My Just Giving page is www.justgiving.com/page/carole-cold-water 😊❄️

PTSD UK

I've signed up for the PTSD UK Dip a Day December challenge and this year I'm going through with it for sure!

I'll keep a video diary which I'll post online so people can see how it's going. Who knows, it may get easier as the month goes on!! We're without hot water atm so it's good training - or that's what I'm telling myself 😂

www.caroledianecoaching.co.uk/blog/what-a-day-reflecting-on-reading-pride-2023

A write up about having been at this year's Reading Pride 😊 it was awesome and I am excited to share this with you!

What a day! Reflecting on Reading Pride 2023 — Carole Diane Coaching Did you stop by my stall at Reading Pride 2023? Did you write on the chalkboards? Take a wristband? See what others wrote and understand how I feel about being at Reading Pride here. Responses ranged from acknowledging the role of friends and family in our lives to how anti-oppressive approaches can

Come down and say hello at today 😄

Come on down and say hello at Reading Pride today

I was so proud to be a part of this. Can you spot me in the photo and the article?? 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️

Championing the rights of the LGBTQ+ community | BPS As the world continues to strive for inclusivity and acceptance, organisations taking part in events like Pride, the annual parade to celebrate the LGBTQ+ community, play a crucial role in helping to promote diversity, foster positive community relations and further build equality for all.

Getting ready for and that includes repainting the chalkboards! I'm excited to see what you all put down in response to this year's question!! 😁🏳️‍🌈

Sorry for the radio silence everyone. I will be trying to keep this profile more up to date with mental health tips for the LGBTQ, poly and ENM communities

As plans and preparations are made for Reading Pride 2023, I thought I'd share some reflections from last year

Reflecting on Reading Pride 2022 — Carole Diane Coaching While preparing for Reading Pride 2023, I thought I'd share thoughts on how my stall for LGBTQ mental health went at Reading Pride 2022. Read on to see how it went and what I'm changing for this year. LGBTQ mental health matters and Pride is all year round.

Did you know that in the experience of feeling angry is a wealth of knowledge for us to tap into?
My latest article explores how we can access this and utilise it to benefit our lives 😊

Anger: How you can learn from it Coaching psychologist Carole Carter reveals what we can learn from anger (and how to regulate it).

Do you need mental health support as a transgender or non-binary person but you don't know where to do or how to find the right person?
Check out my latest article which gives you 4 tips on how to make the search easier

4 tips on finding a therapist or coach when you are transgender or non-binary Finding the right help can feel like a daunting task when you are transgender or non-binary. Check out these tips on how to ease the search

If you have ever wondered how coaching can support polyamorous and ethically non-monogamous people, check out my latest article on the Life Coach Directory website (link below)

Coaching for polyamorous and ethically non-monogamous people Are you in a polyamorous or non-monogamous relationship? Coaching psychologist Carole Carter explains how coaching can support you.

Have you ever wondered if and how coaching can help people into kink and B**M?
I explore this in my latest article so click the link below to find out 🙂

https://www.lifecoach-directory.org.uk/memberarticles/how-can-coaching-help-those-navigating-kink-and-b**m

**M

How can coaching help those navigating kink and B**M? Coaching psychologist Carole explains more about how coaching can help you navigate kink and b**m.

Have you given up with making New Years Resolutions because you don't stick to them? Want to find out how to ensure your success with the goals you do set?
Look no further because I share some brilliant tips in this article for achieving your goals and succeeding

https://www.caroledianecoaching.co.uk/blog/goal-setting

23 goals for 2023? Do this instead! — Carole Diane Coaching Learn how to set effective goals that will get you success, prevent self sabotage and avoid overwhelm. Forget SMART goals, this is entirely different and will set you up to achieve your goals

𝐴 𝑐𝑜𝑢𝑝𝑙𝑒 𝑜𝑓 𝑤𝑒𝑒𝑘𝑠 𝑎𝑔𝑜 𝐼 ℎ𝑒𝑎𝑟𝑑 𝑠𝑜𝑚𝑒𝑜𝑛𝑒 𝑠𝑎𝑦𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑦 𝑤𝑒𝑟𝑒 𝑓𝑒𝑑 𝑢𝑝 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑝𝑒𝑜𝑝𝑙𝑒 𝑎𝑠𝑘𝑖𝑛𝑔 “𝐻𝑎𝑣𝑒 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑡𝑟𝑖𝑒𝑑 𝑚𝑒𝑑𝑖𝑡𝑎𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑔?” 𝑎𝑓𝑡𝑒𝑟 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑦 𝑠ℎ𝑎𝑟𝑒𝑑 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑦 𝑤𝑒𝑟𝑒 𝑠𝑡𝑟𝑢𝑔𝑔𝑙𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑑𝑒𝑝𝑟𝑒𝑠𝑠𝑖𝑜𝑛 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑎𝑛𝑥𝑖𝑒𝑡𝑦.
𝑇ℎ𝑒𝑖𝑟 𝑓𝑟𝑢𝑠𝑡𝑟𝑎𝑡𝑖𝑜𝑛 𝑎𝑡 𝑛𝑜𝑡 𝑏𝑒𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑙𝑖𝑠𝑡𝑒𝑛𝑒𝑑 𝑡𝑜 𝑖𝑠 𝑢𝑛𝑑𝑒𝑟𝑠𝑡𝑎𝑛𝑑𝑎𝑏𝑙𝑒. 𝐴𝑠 𝑖𝑠 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑒𝑥𝑎𝑠𝑝𝑒𝑟𝑎𝑡𝑖𝑜𝑛 𝑎𝑡 ℎ𝑎𝑣𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑤𝑒𝑙𝑙 𝑚𝑒𝑎𝑛𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑝𝑒𝑜𝑝𝑙𝑒 𝑖𝑚𝑝𝑙𝑦 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑎𝑙𝑙 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑦 𝑛𝑒𝑒𝑑 𝑡𝑜 𝑑𝑜 𝑖𝑠 𝑠𝑖𝑡 𝑖𝑛 𝑞𝑢𝑖𝑒𝑡 𝑚𝑒𝑑𝑖𝑡𝑎𝑡𝑖𝑜𝑛 𝑓𝑜𝑟 20 𝑚𝑖𝑛𝑢𝑡𝑒𝑠 𝑎 𝑑𝑎𝑦 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑛 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑦 𝑤𝑜𝑢𝑙𝑑𝑛’𝑡 𝑏𝑒 𝑎𝑛𝑥𝑖𝑜𝑢𝑠 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑑𝑒𝑝𝑟𝑒𝑠𝑠𝑒𝑑. 𝑇ℎ𝑖𝑠 𝑖𝑠 𝑛𝑜𝑡 𝑎 𝑛𝑒𝑤 𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝐼’𝑣𝑒 ℎ𝑒𝑎𝑟𝑑. 𝑈𝑛𝑓𝑜𝑟𝑡𝑢𝑛𝑎𝑡𝑒𝑙𝑦 𝑖𝑡 𝑖𝑠 𝑎 𝑐𝑜𝑚𝑚𝑜𝑛 𝑒𝑥𝑝𝑒𝑟𝑖𝑒𝑛𝑐𝑒 𝑓𝑜𝑟 𝑡ℎ𝑜𝑠𝑒 𝐼 𝑠𝑝𝑒𝑎𝑘 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑤ℎ𝑜 𝑚𝑎𝑘𝑒 𝑜𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟𝑠 𝑎𝑤𝑎𝑟𝑒 𝑜𝑓 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑖𝑟 𝑠𝑡𝑟𝑢𝑔𝑔𝑙𝑒𝑠.

Read on about how meditation and mindfulness are useful for dealing with feelings of anxiety and depression and their limitations in working with these emotions by clicking below

Why meditation is not the cure for depression and anxiety — Carole Diane Coaching A coaching psychologist explores the limits of meditation on its own as a cure for depression and anxiety. This is an important topic when people are so quick to recommend meditation as a fix for other's depression and anxiety.

Happy International Pronouns Day!
We use pronouns all the time. I used one in the last sentence and then again in this one. You use pronouns when you refer to a ship, car or country as 'she' and when you automatically call a pet of unknown s*x 'he'. Even when people complain about others "using pronouns", they actually use pronouns themselves.

We can not do without pronouns. They make language easier to use. Can you imagine how unweildy would this post would be to read if I wasn't able to use 'I', 'we', 'they', 'you', 'one' or indeed any other historic pronouns like 'thee' and 'thou'? How unweildy would it be to speak generally without pronouns at all?
We'd end up saying things like: "John left John's hat over at Becca's place yesterday. But when John went over to Becca's this morning, John realised that Becca had just gone on Becca's honeymoon. John now has to go and buy a replacement because it wasn't John's hat anyway."

You don't need to know all the different pronouns people can use, you just need to ask and then do your best to use the correct ones. It's often easier and more comfortable all round to lead with your own and then let others share. "My pronouns are [enter your pronouns here]. What are yours?" Normalise having pronouns in your email signature, on your zoom account, on your social media.

I am Carole and my pronouns are she/they. I am happy being referred to with they/them pronouns and being referred to as she/her is fine too.
What are your pronouns?

Today is International Pronouns Day

The importance of pronoun communication is crucial. We use pronouns as a way to identify or refer to someone. So, next time if you’re unsure, before making an assumption about someone’s pronouns, just ask.

👉 https://pronounsday.org/

Are you familiar with Inside Out? Have you ever considered what this film is actually teaching people?
We explore this and more in the latest episode of The Proud Psychologist podcast.

Catch it at the link below, at www.caroledianecoaching.co.uk/podcast or on a major streaming service like Spotify, Amazon, Apple and Google 😊



https://www.podomatic.com/podcasts/office55912/episodes/2022-10-17T05_13_46-07_00

What can we learn from Inside Out? A deep dive into the life lesson's Disney Pixar's 2015 film Inside Out contains about emotions with The Proud Psychologist. We pull back the curtain on whether some emotions are more important than others, toxic positivity, how our emotions communicate with us and so much more. Think Disney films ar...

'Flipping out', 'seeing red' and other out of control reactions can be unnerving and scary for us and those around us. My latest article explores what happens when we experience these kinds of reactions and how we can manage them better.

How to understand when you ‘flip out’, ‘see red’ and have other out of control reactions — Carole Diane Coaching Flipping out, seeing red, freaking out, flying off the handle, amygdala hijack, fight, flight, freeze. This article will help you understand what is going on when you have an uncontrollable reaction to something through the lens of amygdala hijack, window of tolerance and polyvagal theory.

Forever with Pride is not just an LGBTQ+ e-magazine we’re an LGBTQ+ multipurpose service provider. One of which is an online LGBTQ Shop and Services Directory so why not pop over to our website and take a look and don’t forget to check out what else we do! www.foreverwithpride.com

I'll be there. Will you?
Terrence Higgins Trust and TVPS are among the 20+ charities organising this London event to challenge the stigma that still surrounds HIV. All are welcome - allies to those affected by HIV as well as those living with the virus.

For more info go to https://www.tht.org.uk/form/fighting-hiv-stigma-and-proud