Share Support Group of Colorado Springs

Bereaved dads, who have been called the forgotten grievers, typically feel as if they need to be “the strong one.” The one who answers everyone’s questions about how the baby’s mother is doing. The one who takes care of his partner while often suppressing his own feelings of grief and longing.

Now, it is Father’s Day weekend, and one or more of your sweet children is not here with you as they should be. This may be your first Father’s Day since your beloved baby died. Or perhaps it has been several years of finding this a challenging time to get through. You may feel as if no one notices or cares about what you are going through. Father’s Day can feel especially devastating if the baby who died is your only child or if you are experiencing infertility and longing to become a father.

You may wonder, “Am I still a father if my only child is no longer here?”

You may wonder, “Do others realize how much my heart aches right now?”

But mostly, you may wonder how you will get through Father’s Day when you are feeling broken and sad.

Father’s Day can be easier to bear if those around you recognize your great loss and acknowledge that you are a father by doing something special to celebrate you. If they do not, you can still find ways to make the day, and your life in general as a grieving father, meaningful. Following are a few suggestions.

*Find a new hobby or spend time with an activity you already enjoy, perhaps one that will enable you to create something as a keepsake that will remind you of your baby. Many grieving parents find comfort in things that allow them to do something with their hands, such as creating a memory garden in their yard. Doing something physical outdoors, such as hiking or running, can also be a peaceful outlet.

*Purchase a piece of jewelry or other memorabilia such as a keychain, cuff links, dog tags, engraved stone to carry in your pocket, or any small item with your baby’s name, engraved hand/footprints, or birthstone.

*Do not be afraid

3 years ago today:
-After my son was stillborn and another miscarriage, I was pregnant again
-Previously, we saw the strong heartbeat at 7 weeks
-This baby's due date was the same as Evan, our son who was stillborn (both due on Christmas Eve)
-This has to be our miracle baby we thought
-9 week ultrasound, there was no heartbeat
-Our OB stomped her feet in frustration from not being able to find the heartbeat and knowing how badly we wanted this baby after our history of loss
-My husband was on a video call watching and listening
-PLEASE GOD, NO! NOT AGAIN!
-Don't we deserve a rainbow baby after losing our other babies? We're loving and kind people
-I was still experiencing lots of pregnancy symptoms
-Options: Mifepristone medication aka abortion pill (nice name for a miscarriage) or D&C surgery
-I chose the pill, gut wrenching process that didn't work
-Schedule the D&C, is this really happening?!
-The last hope to complete our family is gone....forever
-Secondary infertility (I'm sorry but WTF is that?! No one seems to have any answers)
-Trauma, pain, suffering, heartache, heart break, desperation, denial, isolation, sadness, guilt, mourning, wailing for my baby, anger, anger, anger, anger and more anger
-"Friends" desert me because I'm too angry and not the person I used to be
-Take my pain and transform it, I want to help others going through this
-Start a local Chapter of Share (with the help of another Mom) to provide a safe place for families in our community to gather and mourn the loss of our babies

This is for you, my little ones, who I can only hold in my heart

Send a message to learn more

Our national Share support group offers monthly online support groups via Zoom, in addition to weekly chats (no video). They also offer private pages for support.

Please see the link below.

https://nationalshare.org/online-support/

Reminder that group is canceled for tomorrow 5.14.24 and I'm sorry if anyone was planning on coming. I had to hold group a week early due to a schedule conflict. Please call me if you need support before our next support group meeting on 6.11.24

Online Support - Share Pregnancy & Infant Loss Support Online Support Monthly Zoom Support Meeting Please join us on Zoom for support group on the third Monday of the month at 11am CST. You do not need to pre-register. Due to the sensitive nature of these groups, please do not have children/babies with you while on Zoom. Topic: Support Group Time: Feb 1...

You are a mother. Always. 🌸

Today is Mothers Day.

For some women, today was something they dreamed of but now dread.

Its a day to celebrate Mothers but some women aren’t sure if they should be celebrated.

Today, I am here to tell you that you should be.

You are still a mother if you don’t have any living children. You are still mother to all of your children if some are living and some are not.

You are a mother! And you know how I know?

Because I see all that you do for your children.

I see you honoring your babies.
I see you protecting their memory.
I see you loving them with your whole heart.
I see you wishing they were here.
I see your pain.
I see your tears.
I see your broken heart.
I see it all because I am you.
I am a grieving mother too.

And I want to remind you every day that you are a mother but especially today. I know so many women are not going to be acknowledged today. I know so many women are going to be visiting gravesites or holding their child’s urns instead of their precious babies. I know that family photos are going to be taken today with a space that should be filled but is empty.

Please be gentle with yourself today and know that I see you and I see your babies.

💜💙💜💙

Thinking of all the moms who hold their baby in their heart and not their arms. You are a mother, and no one is more deserving to be honored on mothers day than a mom who holds their baby in their heart. Please reach out if you need support this weekend.

🩷

One day
I’ll hold you
On the other side
Until then
I’ll meet you
In my dreams

Important info: group for May will be the first Tuesday this month (may 7) instead of the 2nd. Please reach out to Kate with any questions and location address. Kate: 269.370.0265

from

5 and a half years later and I still gaze at his empty chair at the dinner table and wonder what life would have been like with our little guy.

https://www.koaa.com/news/covering-colorado/grieving-moms-create-local-resource-for-families-coping-with-infant-loss

Grieving moms create local resource for families coping with infant loss Two local women create a chapter of Share to support families through the grief of infant loss with everything from bed-side companions and memorial events to group meetings.

Share offers weekly online support.

The grief from losing a baby can feel so heavy and so isolating. We want you to know that you are not alone.
Join other bereaved parents tonight on our online chat at 7 pm Central Standard time. We will remember our babies, share what is on our hearts, and support one another. https://nationalshare.org/online-support/

Group is tomorrow night at my house. Please reach out to me (Kate) at 269.370.0265 for more information.

Does My Grief Make You Uncomfortable? Me Too. Does my grief make you uncomfortable? Me too. On a daily basis, without the option of unfollowing it, ignoring it, avoiding it without a second thought.

For the fathers who are grieving.

{Find help and hope on http://stillstandingmag.com/ }

Group will be at 7pm tomorrow night (2.13.24) instead of our normal time. Please contact me if you need any information. We've moved locations as well.
Kate 269.370.0265

Wishing you strength comfort, and peace in the new year ahead. We will continue to honor your baby, every day through our efforts to get SHINE passed in 2024!!!

Without our voices, our babies stories will never be told! The time is now to raise the volume on the silent crisis in our country!📣📣📣📣📣📣

We are thinking of all the sweet December babies that should still be here.

Tell us their names & birthdays in the comments so we can continue to SHINE in their memory with you. 💜

SHINE FOR AUTUMN ACT Let’s end preventable stillbirths >21,000 babies Stillbirth accounts for the deaths of more than 21,000 babies in the United States each year. 25+% Scientists estimate that at least 25% of stillbirths are preventable. 30 years Stillbirth rates have remained relatively unchanged for 30 years. Learn...