Emil Space Ågency

ESÅ press release no. 19

We have been putting considerable effort recently into creating a vessel which will allow our kerbonauts to spend considerable time in orbit. Today we unveil our first sustainable space station.

Turbostacja 1 has everything you need. There are solar panels. Batterries. Crew cabins. Science instruments. Hydroponics. A centrifuge.

And a couple of docking ports which are so similar to regular windows that Dad, our pilot, spent a couple of minutes trying to connect a module to one of them. Only then did he realize that while one can crash a window, it is not possible to dock to it.

In spite of this humorous incident, we now have constant presence in orbit. With three kerbonauts aboard the space (!) station and plenty of space (in space!) for more, future is bright for Emil Space Ågency.

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Founded in 2017, ESÅ is a worldwide leader among spaceflight companies who have no idea what they are doing. We help Kerbals reach orbit and strive to achieve at least 50% success rate while avoiding unnecessary fatalities.

ESÅ press release no. 19

Today we launched Felixette - our first kerbosynchronous satellite named after Félicette, the famous first cat in space.

Thanks to huge solar panels, our spacecraft will appear as a very bright spot in the sky. Our engineers call this pheonomenon 'kitku flares'.

Along with some exclusive footage from the launch, we proudly present the PR materials. Emil, our CEO, prepared them himself.

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Founded in 2017, ESÅ is a worldwide leader among spaceflight companies who have no idea what they are doing. We help Kerbals reach orbit and strive to achieve at least 50% success rate while avoiding unnecessary fatalities.

Emil Space Ågency's cover photo

ESÅ press release no. 18

This week our CEO decided to design something cute.

Witness the newest addition to ESÅ spacecraft portfolio: the small, cute space plane called Lilcutie (or Śliczniuś). After initial atmospheric test flights of two versions: one with liquid fuel engine and another with jet engine (the latter beat the unofficial ESÅ speed record in level flight below 1000 m!), we simply put together a rocket from spare parts and launched the liquid-fuelled Lilcutie on top of it, with Valentina behind the wheel.

Needless to say, mission Lilcutie 1R (R is for Rocket!) was a success, as long as we forget about not having remembered to install solar panels or batteries and then overshooting the emergency landing by about 80 kilometers.

'I'm happy to be alive!' - said Valentina after recovery, enthusiastic as always.

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Founded in 2017, ESÅ is a worldwide leader among spaceflight companies who have no idea what they are doing. We help Kerbals reach orbit and strive to achieve at least 50% success rate while avoiding unnecessary fatalities.

ESÅ press release no. 17

Our kerbonauts (and funding authorities) are so enthusiastic about flying to the Mun over and over and over again, that we simply feel compelled to design new rockets and figure out novel ways to explore this body. This time, we present the largest launch vehicle yet, the Moony Satelitnik.

This rocket is capable of lifting a kerballed capsule to the Mun and back again with plenty of fuel to spare. Additionally, it carries a probe with experimental ore drills. Having successfully concluded the remote landing procedure, the probe is currently testing various mining techniques near the rim of the largest crater on the near side of the Mun.

Due to the experimental nature of the mission, the probe is not capable of lifting of with the ore back to the munar orbit. Consequently, another mission to retrieve the samples is currently being planned. The three kerbonauts aboard the Moony Satelitnik command module will remain in the orbit until they become sufficiently bored or hungry to initiate transfer back to Kerbin.

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Founded in 2017, ESÅ is a worldwide leader among spaceflight companies who have no idea what they are doing. We help Kerbals reach orbit and strive to achieve at least 50% success rate while avoiding unnecessary fatalities.

ESÅ press release no. 16

Even though ESÅ is busy researching cutting-edge technologies which will allow us to unravel the deepest mysteries of nearby planets and moons, we are also deeply committed to helping developing countries who want to take their first steps in space. When the Untitled States of Åhmürica approached our Ågency, we were happy to oblige.

In this release, we would like to congratulate USÅ for putting their first satellite into Low Kerbin Orbit. The spacecraft, named Exploder 1, was lifted by the two-stage Jumpiter-D rocket. The Some Parts and Limited Know-how® package was delivered by ESÅ to the Åhmürican space-engineers.

It took them only two failed attempts to realize that when the first stage with fins is jettisoned, the rocket will start to tumble uncontrollably unless it has at least one reaction wheel or other device for maneuvering. When it finally dawned on the USÅ crew, the flight went smoothly and the satellite achieved a remarkably circular orbit, with less than 150 meters of difference between apoapsis and periapsis, and much fuel to spare.

Well done, Åhmürica! If you keep learning this fast, you will land on the Mun in no time!

The Some Parts and Limited Know-how® package is available to interested parties. Terms and conditions may apply.

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Founded in 2017, ESÅ is a worldwide leader among spaceflight companies who have no idea what they are doing. We help Kerbals reach orbit and strive to achieve at least 50% success rate while avoiding unnecessary fatalities.

ESÅ press release no. 15

Although our kerballed spaceflight program remains the top priority, ESÅ is also commited to developing new ways of exploring space. Tonight we successfull launched the HABLA space telescope. While the name may suggest that the probe is designed for visual observations, the primary scientific instruments are a thermometer and a tank containing some mysterious goo.

This mission was also significant from another point of view. For the first time, our Ågency built and successfully launched a single-stage-to-orbit spacecraft. 'I wanted to make a big rocket' - said Emil, our CEO and chief designer.

The HABLA telescope was put in a circular low Kerbin orbit and is currently undergoing tests. We expect the first scientific data to arrive soon.

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Founded in 2017, ESÅ is a worldwide leader among spaceflight companies who have no idea what they are doing. We help Kerbals reach orbit and strive to achieve at least 50% success rate while avoiding unnecessary fatalities.

ESÅ press release no. 14

We apologize for our recent silence. However, all our efforts were focused on the mission which we will describe here. Rest assured: as always, everything went better than expected!

When Jebediah Kerman finished collecting samples on the Mun and took off, he realized that his spacecraft did not have sufficient Delta-V to return to Kerbin. Unwilling to be stuck in a long, elliptic kerbocentric orbit, he skillfully put his craft into a circular orbit around the Mun. Then he radioed for help. This probably was better than any other option because his spacecraft suffered a pre-launch heat shield malfunction (i.e. it was never installed).

Our Ågency quickly put together another rocket. For the second time in history, a three-person crew module was used. Valentina Kerman assumed command with Phoebe Kerman as a co-pilot. They quickly made orbit and burned hard in a trans-munar injection maneuver. At the same time, Jebediah did his best to calculate a proper orbit for the rendezvous around the Mun. However, he quickly realized that due to lack of reaction-control system on his craft, most of the maneuvering would have to be done by the rescue team. Valentina and Phoebe achieved a co-planar orbit with ease. Soon a proper course correction was calculated and executed. Using short burst of RCS engines, Valentina was able to meet Jebediah's craft. Both capsules were separated by only 10 meters of vacuum.

After short station-keeping, Jebediah left his capsule for the last time and used his EVA pack to travel the short distance between both vehicles. Soon we had three Kerbals safely on board. Jebediah's former spacecraft was then deliberately crashed into the Mun, while the rescue ship burned towards Kerbin. The fiery reentry took place right over our space center. Soon the crew module splashed down and was recovered.

"We consider this to be ESÅ's finest hour!" - said Emil, CEO and chief designer of both Jebediah's moon landing capsule and the rescue ship. "No Kerbal gets left behind" - added Dad, who served as the mission planner.

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Founded in 2017, ESÅ is a worldwide leader among spaceflight companies who have no idea what they are doing. We help Kerbals reach orbit and strive to achieve at least 50% success rate while avoiding unnecessary fatalities.

ESÅ press release no. 13

Just as we announced in our previous press release, our commercial program is well under way. The first kerbonautourists who decided to land on the Mun (and make a bold attempt to return to Kerbin) were Hansted Kerman and Tratrey Kerman. Hansted and Tratrey were particularly interested in receiving a discount. We happily obliged to offer a discounted version of the trip: "To the Mun and back again, without a heat shield and without reserve fuel".

Our kerbonautourists were a little bit worried, but relaxed as soon as we explained that the return trip will be at least four times longer due to five aerobraking maneuvers necessary to slow the crew module down. In other words, ESÅ offered more time in space for less money!

Hansted and Tratrey were thrilled to observe Kerbin multiple times while flying through the highest parts of the atmosphere. Each time the flames were obstructing the view while deafening overheating alarms were blaring. It made the experiences of our kerbonautourists even more unforgettable.

After a little bit over nine days of mission time, the capsule splashed down safely near our space center. "Pfew!" - said Tratrey Kerman after leaving the spacecraft.

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Founded in 2017, ESÅ is a worldwide leader among spaceflight companies who have no idea what they are doing. We help Kerbals reach orbit and strive to achieve at least 50% success rate while avoiding unnecessary fatalities.

ESÅ press release no. 12

We are happy to announce that, after a slight change of plans, instead of starting our Mun exploration program with a remote-controlled rover, we decided to send Kerbals to the Mun and return them safely to Kerbin. After gathering invaluable data from missions which were expected to enter the munar orbit, Jebediah Kerman managed to softly land on the near side. "What a crater" - Emil, CEO and founder of ESÅ was heard saying during the descent.

While Jebediah was eager to plant his feet in the soft munar ground, unexpected complications prevented him from continuing with the mission schedule. It turned out that the ladder stayed back in the space center. When another two kerbonauts returned to the Mun a few weeks later, their excursion to the surface encountered unexpected complications yet again. This time, the hatch was obstructed by one of the landing struts. Members of the crew declined to explain how they managed to get into the lander in a way that prevented them to get out. A new, revised design of the lander was prepared and the third attempt was utterly successful! As soon as Jebediah touched the munar soil, he jumped joyfully and discovered, that he could reach the hatch and the ladder was not necessary at all.

Experience gained during these pioneer missions allowed us to kickstart a commercial program. Preparations for first missions with space tourists are well under way. We hope that our transparency will encourage more brave Kerbals to reach above and beyond and join the ranks of kerbonautourists!

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Founded in 2017, ESÅ is a worldwide leader among spaceflight companies who have no idea what they are doing. We help Kerbals reach orbit and strive to achieve at least 50% success rate while avoiding unnecessary fatalities.

ESÅ press release no. 11

Before launching a remote-controlled rover to the Mun, any respectable space program has to master the intricacies of soft-landing in airless environment. ESÅ is proud to announce that the mission of Emil's munar probe 1 (or Sonda księżycowa Emila 1) was a complete success!

A two-staged rocket with four boosters lifted off gently from our space center. The trans-munar injection was smooth and precise. Our probe landed on the Mun with some fuel to spare, deployed all its solar panels and transmitted its beacon signal back to Kerbin.

We are happy to confirm that the spacecraft is in good condition!

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Founded in 2017, ESÅ is a worldwide leader among spaceflight companies who have no idea what they are doing. We help Kerbals reach orbit and strive to achieve at least 50% success rate while avoiding unnecessary fatalities.

ESÅ press release no. 10

At ESÅ we have always supported reasonable and fair technology transfer. Now, when our next aim is to send a remote-controller rover to the Mun, we decided to expand our relationships with other important industry figures. We would like to thank AGH Space Systems for welcoming our CEO with open arms, not shying away from uttering the word 'oxidizer' next to him, and of course for sharing important technical details without unnecessary non-disclosure agreements.

As always, more details about current ESÅ activities will follow (in due time).

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Founded in 2017, ESÅ is a worldwide leader among spaceflight companies who have no idea what they are doing. We help Kerbals reach orbit and strive to achieve at least 50% success rate while avoiding unnecessary fatalities.

ESÅ press release no. 9

'Nice Rocket' was our first spacecraft with recoverable boosters.

'This is a rocket with three engines, three parachutes, a decoupler and a command module. I did it myself when Dad wasn't looking' - said Emil, ESÅ chief designer after the successful launch. 'Nuff' said' - added Dad.

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Founded in 2017, ESÅ is a worldwide leader among spaceflight companies who have no idea what they are doing. We help Kerbals reach orbit and strive to achieve at least 50% success rate while avoiding unnecessary fatalities.

ESÅ press release no. 8

Thanks to numerous tests, experiments and research, we managed to create our first remotely piloted rocket capable of putting a satellite into a stable Low Kerbin Orbit or LKO. It took us only four attempts to do everything right or, as our pilot likes to say, to test everything.

During the first mission (Satelitnik 1), the satellite reached orbit and tested the effects of lack of a decoupler which would let the probe detach from the final stage. Satelitnik 2 reached a similar, circular orbit and tested the effects of not unfolding the solar panels before using up all the power. We conclude that it makes the spacecraft uncontrollable. Satelitnik 3 was another successful flight which tested the effects of not installing scientific equipment on a scientific probe expected to gather orbital data. Satelitnik 4 reached LKO again and everything was as nominal as one can only dream, which convinced our PR department to authorize the release of photos.

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Founded in 2017, ESÅ is a worldwide leader among spaceflight companies who have no idea what they are doing. We help Kerbals reach orbit and strive to achieve at least 50% success rate while avoiding unnecessary fatalities.

ESÅ press release no. 7

Our accomplished pilot corps are sometimes too busy to test all our designs. Thanks to our disruptive and agile approach, we launched a new project which enabled us to test small-scale spaceplanes without having to put our pilots' nerves at risk, while also preparing our infrastructure for launching kerbonautless spacecraft.

The "Little something with wheels" drone plane is our first series of remotely piloted vehicles. Our designer decided to experiment a bit more aggresively. That is why the original plane was rocket-powered, tailless and - which was extremely important during the nighttime test - equipped with two solar panels.

As always, thanks to our policy of cockpit recovery, the front part of the plane survived the sudden aerobatics show which started just after takeoff and ended just after crash-landing.

In "Little something with wheels Mk 2" a small tail fin was installed. Thanks to this ingenious addition, the plane reached approximately 450m before entering a flat spin. The cockpit-resembling front part was subsequently recovered in accordance with company policy. The issue was solved in "Little something with wheels Mk 3" thanks to our bold decision to switch to V-tails and retractable gear.

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Founded in 2017, ESÅ is a worldwide leader among spaceflight companies who have no idea what they are doing. We help Kerbals reach orbit and strive to achieve at least 50% success rate while avoiding unnecessary fatalities.

ESÅ press release no. 6

Even when flight after flight after flight we enjoy tremendous successes, mistakes can be made. That is why our professional pilots are encouraged to give their feedback even right before launch. When Jebediah Kerman mentioned that it might not be the best idea if we try to fly a jet with overstressed wings without any control surfaces, we quickly assembled a team to assess these remarks.

After a quick but lively discussion, the team concurred. 'Dad, we really need some elevons' - said Emil, our CEO and chief designer.

The subsequent flight achieved more than we expected! Not only did the jet breach the sound barrier, but we also managed to run a test to determine the effects of slamming both engines into the ground just before the runway. The results were inconclusive, but the data appear to suggest that they disintegrate.

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Founded in 2017, ESÅ is a worldwide leader among spaceflight companies who have no idea what they are doing. We help Kerbals reach orbit and strive to achieve at least 50% success rate while avoiding unnecessary fatalities.

ESÅ press release no. 5

Training kerbonauts is one of the most important aspects of our space program. We make sure that all our pilots have outstanding skills and maintain appropriate balance between courage and stupidity.

In order to provide a sufficient training platform, we have designed a supersonic jet. 'The first part we installed was a parachute and the second was a decoupler. Our goal is to recover at least the cockpit after every flight' - said Emil, CEO and chief designer.

Founded in 2017, ESÅ is a worldwide leader among spaceflight companies who have no idea what they are doing. We help Kerbals reach orbit and strive to achieve at least 50% success rate while avoiding unnecessary fatalities.

ESÅ press release no. 4

After the short but explosive test flight of Doublecockpitter (see release no. 1) we promised to review the design and try again. We finished the review ahead of schedule and we are excited to announce that the test launch of Doublecockpitter II was a tremendous success.

The almost-suborbital almost-controlled atmospheric flight took about 12 minutes from liftoff to splashdown. Due to safety considerations, only one pilot was aboard. 'This is an important step which brings us 12 minutes closer to sending furry animals into space' - commented Emil, CEO and chief designer.

Founded in 2017, ESÅ is a worldwide leader among spaceflight companies who have no idea what they are doing. We help Kerbals reach orbit and strive to achieve at least 50% success rate while avoiding unnecessary fatalities.

ESÅ press release no. 3

At ESÅ we never cease to design new rockets and plan new missions. 'We don't have to go back to the drawing board. We haven't left it yet' - said Emil, CEO and chief designer.

Our current plans involve sending a furry animal to another celestial body. The challenge may be to fit such a huge animal into a tiny rocket, but as always, ESÅ will sort things out.

Founded in 2017, ESÅ is a worldwide leader among spaceflight companies who have no idea what they are doing. We help Kerbals reach orbit and strive to achieve at least 50% success rate while avoiding unnecessary fatalities.

ESÅ press release no. 2

The CEO and chief designer of the Emil Space Ågency is carefully planning a future mission.

'ESÅ chooses to go to the Mun not because it's easy, but because it is awesome' - announced Dad, who has yet to come up with the idea how to actually land a tin can with rockets.

Founded in 2017, ESÅ is a worldwide leader among spaceflight companies who have no idea what they are doing. We help Kerbals reach orbit and strive to achieve at least 50% success rate while avoiding unnecessary fatalities.

ESÅ press release no. 1

Emil Space Ågency debuted on the spaceflight market with an attempt to launch the Doublecockpitter [Polish: dwukabinowiec]. "This was our first rocket. It was nice but didn't really fly" - said Emil, ESÅ CEO and chief designer. "I barely managed to separate the crew cabin before the whole thing did a backflip" - added Emil's Dad, the pilot.

The crew ejected safely approximately 4 seconds after liftoff.

ESÅ also announced it would redesign the vehicle and make another attempt to orbit the planet without blowing anything up, if possible.

Founded in 2017, ESÅ is a worldwide leader among spaceflight companies who have no idea what they are doing. We help Kerbals reach orbit and strive to achieve at least 50% success rate while avoiding unnecessary fatalities.

Emil Space Ågency