Bridges 2 Understanding - Cynthia Klein

When your child/tween/teen has a challenge or experience that primarily impacts them, then I suggest that you respond as a Supporter. As a supportive listener, you say in your mind and perhaps aloud, “This is your challenge to solve. This is your experience to share. I’m not going to take it over and try to tell you what to do or take away your feelings about it. I will listen as you express yourself.”

Wow!! Have you ever said this? This is a very scary exclamation to make. You may think, what if they make a mistake? What if they followed my advice and were happier as a result? You’d be happier too because you wouldn’t have to see them suffer.

Our fears can easily keep us from being the supporter that our children need in order to learn how to handle challenging situations and gain confidence. So, when your fear entices you to rescue them with advice, stop yourself.

There are 4 steps to being a successful supporter. Read more about Steps 1 & 2: https://conta.cc/4cjYReF

Imagine your child/tween/teen comes home from school looking upset.

What would your first action or words be?

- What’s wrong?
- What happened?
- You look like you are upset.

Are these questions working for you? Are they opening up? If not, I'll be talking about what could be a more effective way to respond in the future.

Read the full article - https://conta.cc/4cjYReF

Have you ever been confused about when to give advice to your child/tween/teen and when to let them make a decision? If so, you are not alone. Every parent grapples with this question.

School is starting soon, which means there will be new situations where the question of who should solve the problem will arise. Your child may feel anxious about a new school or teacher. Perhaps some friends are no longer there, so they feel lonely. Maybe they’ll struggle with schoolwork.

It’s important to have a system for deciding whether the challenge is one for your child to handle, for you to handle together, or where you need to step in and make the decision.

There is no cut-and-dry way to decide on problem ownership. However, I would like to give you a guide that will help you decide when you’ll say, “This is your problem to solve and I’m here to support you. I won’t tell you what to do.”

I call this being in the Supporter Role and this is the focus of this article. Read more and learn more about the 10-step guide -

“When Does My Child Make Their Own Decisions?” 10 Questions to help you decide. Aug52024Parenting with Emotional IntelligenceHave you ever been confused about when to give advice to your child/tween/teen and when to let them make a decision? If so, you are not alone. Every parent grapples with this question. School is starting soon, which means there will be new situations whe...

I’ve been thinking about all of the parenting challenges that couples confront on a daily basis. Wow! Some of you have a partner who wants to learn new parenting skills with you, and some do not. There seems to still be a stigma around men, in particular, seeking advice.

I love coaching men, as the dads I’ve worked with know. I respect you and I know how important you are to your children. I want to help you get through the male training that can make it difficult to connect with children and guide them as an ally rather than as an adversary.

The couple’s relationship is the foundation. Children are an “extra.” Creating a supportive and loving partnership is difficult. It’s like putting together a puzzle with missing and misshaped pieces and no clear image of the finished picture. Read more....

Visit my blog to read the 5 part "Couples Uniting Together Series". You don't want to miss this amazing article! https://conta.cc/3XVURNZ

Your relationship is like the border of the puzzle which needs to be put in place first. When the border has bent or missing pieces, the picture can’t be complete until these pieces are fixed and found.

Your children and the interactions with them are like the pieces in the middle. Your solid framework, or border, gives them the security to struggle and grow which is their job.

While coaching many couples, I have helped them grapple with and find solutions together to 3 main conflict areas so they can build a strong border. I believe you will gain wisdom and encouragement from their success stories.

Read the full article - https://conta.cc/3XVURNZ

Which of these problem areas are you experiencing with your children?

- Won't participate in family activities
- Plans quickly fail and you start dictating
- Argues about d**g chores
- Struggles with homework or school
- Doesn't take responsibility for actions

What do all of these challenges have in common?

Answer: All of these challenges are best approached by discussing them and finding solutions together with the other family members.

What do many parents do instead? They dictate the solution and end up getting rebellion in return.

If you've been acting like a Dictator- It’s important to STOP NOW and instead learn how to have collaborative discussions where the family develops an effective plan that everyone agrees to try. This parenting role is called being the Collaborator.

Join my free workshop "The Proven Path to Joyful Family Discussions."

Learn the 5-Step Problem Solving Process AND how to make sure kids follow through with their commitments.

There's still time to sign up!
Class starts today, July 12 at 12:00 pm PT / 3:00 pm ET

I look forward to seeing you there!

Learn more and register - https://conta.cc/4eUkvZt

Which of these problem areas are you experiencing with your children?

- Won't participate in family activities
- Plans quickly fail and you start dictating
- Argues about d**g chores
- Struggles with homework or school
- Doesn't take responsibility for actions

What do all of these challenges have in common?

Answer: All of these challenges are best approached by discussing them and finding solutions together with the other family members.

What do many parents do instead? They dictate the solution and end up getting rebellion in return.

If you've been acting like a Dictator- It’s important to STOP NOW and instead learn how to have collaborative discussions where the family develops an effective plan that everyone agrees to try. This parenting role is called being the Collaborator.

Join my free workshop "The Proven Path to Joyful Family Discussions."

Learn the 5-Step Problem Solving Process AND how to make sure kids follow through with their commitments.

Don't Miss Out! Tomorrow is the last class!

Friday, July 12 - 12 pm PT

Learn more and register - https://conta.cc/4eUkvZt

Don't Miss Out! The class starts today!

Which of these problem areas are you experiencing with your children?

- Won't participate in family activities
- Plans quickly fail and you start dictating
- Argues about d**g chores
- Struggles with homework or school
- Doesn't take responsibility for actions

What do all of these challenges have in common?

Answer: All of these challenges are best approached by discussing them and finding solutions together with the other family members.

What do many parents do instead? They dictate the solution and end up getting rebellion in return.

If you've been acting like a Dictator- It’s important to STOP NOW and instead learn how to have collaborative discussions where the family develops an effective plan that everyone agrees to try. This parenting role is called being the Collaborator.

Join my free workshop "The Proven Path to Joyful Family Discussions."

Learn the 5-Step Problem Solving Process AND how to make sure kids follow through with their commitments.

I'm offering the class at two different times, select the time that works best for you:

Today - Wednesday, July 10 - 7:00 pm PT then again on Friday, July 12 - 12 pm PT

Learn more and select a time that works for you - https://conta.cc/4eUkvZt

Don't Miss Out! The class starts tomorrow!

Which of these problem areas are you experiencing with your children?

- Won't participate in family activities
- Plans quickly fail and you start dictating
- Argues about d**g chores
- Struggles with homework or school
- Doesn't take responsibility for actions

What do all of these challenges have in common?

Answer: All of these challenges are best approached by discussing them and finding solutions together with the other family members.

What do many parents do instead? They dictate the solution and end up getting rebellion in return.

If you've been acting like a Dictator- It’s important to STOP NOW and instead learn how to have collaborative discussions where the family develops an effective plan that everyone agrees to try. This parenting role is called being the Collaborator.

Join my free workshop "The Proven Path to Joyful Family Discussions."

Learn the 5-Step Problem Solving Process AND how to ensure kids follow through with their commitments.

I'm offering the class at two different times, select the time that works best for you:

* Wednesday, July 10 - 7:00 pm PT
* Friday, July 12 - 12 pm PT

Learn more and select a time - https://conta.cc/4eUkvZt

Which of these problem areas are you experiencing with your children?

- Won't participate in family activities
- Plans quickly fail and you start dictating
- Argues about d**g chores
- Struggles with homework or school
- Doesn't take responsibility for actions

What do all of these challenges have in common?

Answer: All of these challenges are best approached by discussing them and finding solutions together with the other family members.

What do many parents do instead? They dictate the solution and end up getting rebellion in return.

If you've been acting like a Dictator- It’s important to STOP NOW and instead learn how to have collaborative discussions where the family develops an effective plan that everyone agrees to try. This parenting role is called being the Collaborator.

Join my free workshop "The Proven Path to Joyful Family Discussions."

Learn the 5-Step Problem Solving Process AND how to make sure kids follow through with their commitments.

I'm offering the class at two different times, select the time that works best for you:

Wednesday, July 10 - 7:00 pm PT
Friday, July 12 - 12 pm PT

Learn more and select a time - https://conta.cc/4eUkvZt

I believe that whether we feel worthy or not has so much to do with the message we heard growing up.

And, the messages from your family that you are unworthy will often continue into adulthood. I know from listening to many of you that the hurtful and critical words from your parents have continued as criticism of how you are raising your children. Or, perhaps your partner is criticizing your parenting approach.

Wherever the “unworthy” language comes from, it hurts.

Read the full article - https://conta.cc/3xtDXM6

Which of these problem areas are you experiencing with your children?

- Won't participate in family activities
- Plans quickly fail and you start dictating
- Argues about d**g chores
- Struggles with homework or school
- Doesn't take responsibility for actions

What do all of these challenges have in common?

Answer: All of these challenges are best approached by discussing them and finding solutions together with the other family members.

What do many parents do instead? They dictate the solution and end up getting rebellion in return.

If you've been acting like a Dictator- It’s important to STOP NOW and instead learn how to have collaborative discussions where the family develops an effective plan that everyone agrees to try. This parenting role is called being the Collaborator.

Join my free workshop "The Proven Path to Joyful Family Discussions."

Learn the 5-Step Problem Solving Process AND how to make sure kids follow through with their commitments.

I'm offering the class at three different times, select the time that works best for you:

Monday, June 24 - 7pm PT
Wednesday, June 26 - 10 am PT
Friday, June 28 - 12 pm PT

Learn more and select a time - https://conta.cc/4b4d278

Learning how to have collaborative discussions in your family is crucial to teaching your children responsibility, how to be flexible, and how to share their ideas and listen to others amongst other important life skills. It is often challenging to understand when it’s appropriate to discuss and plan together, when you need to set the rules, or when it’s important to say, “You make the decision. I’ll support you.”

You collaborate when the parent and child both want to solve the problem. Here’s where it gets tricky, however. For example, collaborating on chore responsibilities is important, but children don’t see chores as a problem. They don’t want to do chores. So I expand the criteria for collaborating to situations where the outcome directly impacts all people involved.

Read the full article - https://conta.cc/4egjJ93

Are you giving your children chances to succeed? Kids need decision-making opportunities.

One way children have chances to succeed is when you give respectful directions that are set up in a way that they will probably follow. In other words, where they don’t feel you are being bossy too often. Children don’t respond well to feeling pushed around.

I’ve talked about the one-word approach I used to get Jen to take over her dishes. I also used this for other tasks, such as picking up her wet towel off of the bathroom floor.

Another approach that can be effectively used when a child is asking for something they want to do is the After-then strategy. Whenever Jen asked to go to a friend's house, for example, I would think, “What chores hasn’t she done yet?” before answering her. Often, it was cleaning the bathroom.

Read the full article - https://conta.cc/3wMSS3v

Setting electronic limits is getting more and more challenging!

The first step in creating your family’s electronics use guidelines is to start a family discussion about your family’s current electronics use.

This discussion should include children talking about parents’ use of electronics as well as parents talking about children’s. The purpose of the discussion and resulting guidelines is to create greater family harmony, cooperation, and unity. Your children need to learn that each person’s actions impact the other family members. No one exists in a vacuum.

Read this weeks article to learn more - https://conta.cc/3X4X1un

What is confidence and how do we help develop confident children? These are important questions that you are probably thinking about, too.

The definition of confidence is: A feeling of self-assurance arising from one’s appreciation of one’s own abilities or qualities.

As I created my latest workshop, I realized how closely tied a child’s confidence is to how much they are willing to contribute to family harmony. Most children want the home to be pleasant when they feel good inside. I do acknowledge that some children have challenges that make feeling good about themselves more difficult.

Read the full article - https://conta.cc/3wMSS3v

How many of these strategies have you tried and you still aren’t getting the positive results you were hoping for?

- Discussing solutions
- Asking nicely - “Please……” “Would you….”
- Listening to feelings
- Yelling or threatening with words such as, “If you don’t…..”
- Using logical consequences
- And more...

Do you wonder why your current approach isn’t working?

Join me for this free online class and learn how to create more happiness and harmony in your home.

"Family Hassle to Harmony: 2 Exclusive Actions That Work"
May 21st, from 11:00 am - 12:00 pm PT

Learn more and register - https://conta.cc/4b2LP5D