WHISNewcastle

🔥The Power of “…And...” 🔥

‘And’ is such a powerful word when it comes to anxiety, here is why:

The nature of anxious thoughts often tend to start with “what if ” or "what will happen if" and we find ourselves catastrophizing i.e. think of worse case scenarios.

Those thoughts often come thick and fast which means that our bodies respond and we find ourselves with uncomfortable physical symptoms.

We then think there is truth to those thoughts, more “what if” and “what will happen if” thoughts arise and we then find ourselves in a negative vicious cycle mentally and physically.
Its exhausting...😩

👉A reminder that our thoughts don’t reflect the truth, they are our subjective reflections and interpretations of the world.

By adding the word “And” to the end of an anxious thought and stating the opposite, it takes the power out of that thought. It also manages to shift something within us.
Some examples:

💭What if I’m late for my appointment…and… I arrive on time

💭What if I’ve failed my exam…and…I’ve done enough to pass

💭What if my holiday gets cancelled…and…it goes ahead as planned

💭What will happen if I don't find a parking space… and… there will be a free parking space

💭Everything is going to go wrong today…and… everything will be ok

I use this a lot, daily, as it takes the sting out of the anxious often catastrophic thought, it makes me realise my thoughts are not facts and that there is an alternative truth which is just as valid.

👉Another truth (which I’ll write about in another post) is that, even if what you fear happens, you will have the inner resources to deal with it, we are resilient beings, we have more strength that we think we do.

What about you? Have you used this exercise before?
If not, why not give it a go?

As always, any questions or comments please post below or DM me ❤️

(📷 Anton Darius - Unsplash)

🤔Do You Believe Your Thoughts?

According to a study in 2020 published in Nature journal, researchers found we have approx. 6000 thoughts per day, many of these are repetitive and the majority of these are negative.

🤔Do you find that because you have a thought – it must be true? Do you ever question your thoughts?

What if you knew that your thoughts in and of themselves are meaningless?

💥Thoughts are the way we as humans make sense of and experience the world. It is just something humans do; we think.

💥Our thoughts are our perceptions and are subjective.

For example – 2 people look out of a window and its raining.
Person A thinks “oh no I am going to get wet when I go outside, I hate the rain”
Person B thinks, “Fantastic! It’s raining, my garden plants will get some much needed watering”

Each thought is an interpretation which is true for that person, but is not the universal truth which in this case is, that it’s raining.

💥When we have anxious thoughts or catastrophic thoughts, they are just not true, they are just our interpretation of what we are experiencing in the world.

💥Our interpretation is fluid, flexible and can be challenged and changed. It is just the way our minds work.

💥We have been conditioned to believe that what we think is true, so all this may feel a little uncomfortable.

✨“I discovered that when I believed my thoughts, I suffered but then when I didn’t believe them, I didn’t suffer and that is true for every human being” Byron Katie ✨

⭐️From a personal point of view, this was one of the biggest factors that helped me with my own unwanted anxiety.

⭐️I have also had clients who have said to me “Why has no one ever told me this before, that I don’t need to believe my thoughts”

🤔How would your anxiety look if you didn’t believe your thoughts? Do you think it would change?

Any questions or reflections? Do you agree or disagree with this?please comment or DM me. I'd love to know what you think of this post 😊

📷 - the framed statement in the photo was made by a very dear friend of mine and lives in my study, where I can be reminded of the message as often as possible

Really helpful post about anxiety! 👍🥰

🌸 Why do we get anxiety?

I received this question last week and wondered how many people are thinking about this question. Here is my attempt to answer it as briefly as possible!

1 - Over thousands of years, our way of life, with the engineering, social and technological advances has progressed way quicker than our brains and bodies have evolved.
As a result our anxiety responses are still valid for when we lived in hunter-gather times around 12,000 years ago. This is a big mismatch.

2 - We are wired to have a negative bias, it keeps us safe which is all our mind wants us to do. we have descended from ancestors who erred on the side of caution.
In those times, erring on the side of positivity and optimism often resulted in death.

3- We are conditioned to feel anxious from a very young age by our caregivers, community, society, media. This happens almost always without awareness (except the media - its in their interest to keep us anxious).

4- Previous events or experiences which were perceived as stressful or traumatic can cause anxiety. The mind wants us to avoid those experiences again at all cost and wants to keep us safe.

5 - Lifestyle choices can exacerbate our anxiety, things can include lack of sleep, poor diet, drinking too much alcohol, lack of exercise, addictive behaviours and more.

6- In the perimenopause and menopause time, hormonal fluctuations which are linked to our wellbeing hormones can exacerbate anxiety.

🔴 ITS NOT YOUR FAULT THAT YOU FEEL ANXIOUS and with awareness, understanding and changing the way we see it, it CAN be overcome 🔴

Let me know in the comments or DM me if this is helpful (or not) or you want to know more about any of these points. I can do further posts.

I'm still finding my way on here so will welcome any questions or ideas on what you want to know on anxiety ❤️

(📷 Mona Eendra - Unsplash)
I love love love cherry blossoms and the season has just about ended here in the North East of England so had a share a cherry blossom pic 🌸