FSCL

Yesh! Plej make Onkotopia obaar theyar

Satya Nadella: A petition to Bill Gates to buy the country of Democratic Peoples Republic of... Bill Gates,the greatest philanthropist on Earth has a net worth of $85 Billion Dollars,we believe that with that amount of money comes a lot of responsibility to the people of the world,since not a lot of people can effect change. We believe that if a person can effect a change then he should. The c…

FSCL's doing an AMA!

Yesh!

It ij a long taim shins da FSCL has poshteds.

Sho I thinks we can do somethings.

Ai, Janus, ij readiiesh to anshaar any koschen eu has about mes.

(Yesh, I doings an AMA todays)

Sho gets da koschen readys!

-Janus

(CC: Joy Datta, Anoushka Chakraborty, Luv Mehta, Gayathri Nair, Apratim Chakrabarti, Ankita Ghosh, Rohit Sutradhar and Vedanta Bagchi.)

Yesh!

It ij a long taim shins da FSCL has poshteds.

Sho I thinks we can do somethings.

Ai, Janus, ij readiiesh to anshaar any koschen eu has about mes.

(Yesh, I doings an AMA todays)

Sho gets da koschen readys!

-Janus

(CC: Joy Datta, Anoushka Chakraborty, Luv Mehta, Gayathri Nair, Apratim Chakrabarti, Ankita Ghosh, Rohit Sutradhar and Vedanta Bagchi.)

Throwback time!

Since our beloved Panicker has been off Facebook for a while, we shall take this most wonderful opportunit(itt)y to revisit his antics here, there and everywhere!

We hope to see his arrival soon enough!

-Profs. Janus, WCH and BLV

Yesh! TODAYSH MATHAMATIKAAL REASONINGS CLAASH I HOPE EU ALL AANDARSTOODS!

Because today I gives you all da homewaark.

Oks. Takes down da shaams.

1) Given: Roses are reds, Violets are blues. Proves that in Soviet Russia, condom wears eu.

2) Let f(d) be a faankshaan where d=attendansh of person x, x is da strings. Given f'(d)=f(d).

Prove that f(x)= 1, when x="Afut"

and when x="Jon", what da aanshaar?

3) Portmanteau is da game which my good student (very good boysh) Tarsus plays. Everyone says that da English Language alwej has da new words. Portmanteau involves da taking of any two waards and conjoinings them. How many combinashaans maximum can Tarsus makes?

Yesh solves da shaams atharwaish ai takes cashe tomorrows!

-Janus

CC: Joy Dt, Luv Mehta, Shreya Srivastava, Anoushka Chakraborty, Priyanka Sarkar, Srijon Mukherjee, Ruru Ghoshal, Vedanta Bagchi, Amrit Paul, Shaunak Mukherjee, Manisha Mallick Choudhuri, Oishi Lahiri

So...
FSCL got its own Award Ceremony this evening!
I'm glad everyone came for it!
The results are as posted below:
Negative Attendance Award- Srijon
Veteran Laundrobot Survivor Award- Afut
Laundrobot Preventer Award- Sayari
Desh Ki Dharti Award- GGB
Best Cook Award- Afut
Culinary Award- GGB
Best Sibling Award- Manisha and Arya, Sorro and Tim
Best Ship Award- Afut and the Boeing 747.
Best DotSpammer(Male) Award- Srijon and Anudyuti
Best DotSpammer(Female) Award- Megho and GGB
Sec c est Female- Manisha and Srijon
Mothchester Infested Award for Most Outspoken Fanatic- Shaunak and Souradeep
Franco-Spanish Cat- Janus
Bweeness Overdose Award- Radhikaa
Best Hair and Moobs award- Janus and Srijon Mukherjee
Big Bang Award- Atif(aka Afut)
Bae of Bengal Award- Vedanta and Megho
Globetrotter Award- Anudyuti(C69)
Harry Potter Award- Shubhagata(Spooky) and Megho
Curiousity Award- Aditi(Votizdis)
Lifetime Achievement Award- Joy Dt(Yoda)
Best Chul Award- Apratim, Srijon, Dea
New Face Award-Ronnie
Tu ne Maari Entriyaan award for Most Unusual Group Entry- Rahul(Boro Bagchi)
Alia Bhatt Award for weirdest answer- Meghomala(Llama is an animal starting with "i")
Stud Awards- Shaunak and Rajarshi
Best Bby Award- Luv Mehta
Best Chul Award(Female)- Anoushka Chakraborty(GGB)
Heinz Award for Saucy Wit- Dipanjali Saha(Dippy pls)
Helga Geerhart Award for Outstanding B**M- Devanjali Banerjee(Dominatrix)
Thank you all for caamingsh! Next time I brings da Argand Plane for all you peoples!

>Mes and da Hegomala late in da Maths HOD's offish
>"Sir, maybe I should talk to Jon first"
>"No mai diaar, we don't needsh dat boysh"
>"Sir"
>"Yesh?"
>"I'M TOO YOUNG FOR THIS SIR! I'm feeling v. nervous"
>"Laeshen mai diaar, everyone hash to do eets at any pointsh of times, so why waits?"
>"Ok sir"
>"But it's my first time..."
>"No worriesh my diaar, I helps you and takes eu shtep by eeshtep"
>"Ok sir"
>Turns to page 345 to the Differential Calculus section of FSCL Organizer

Applicashaan 2 of Mathamatiksh:

Makings da limericks.

Becaush da English Mashtaar of FSCL not doings anythingsh.

Kthnxbai~

-Janus

Applicashaan 1 of Mathamatiksh: Defedings eur gaarlfriend.

And YESH! Introdushings da new eeshtudent Mrs. Diya Newfag (Diya Mukherjee)

Be good boysh, or I takes eur cashe :3
-Janus

YESH!

Lasht time I gives da homewaark I sees lot of shtudents give bhery bad excushes.

I suggests eu gos to dish bou called Doucheton and shtady hees saabject

(Afut: But sir, my work is actually like Menni's...)

GO AND SHTAND AUTSHAID AFUT!

(but sir...)

GO AND SHTAND AUTSHAID I SHED!

Anywaysh. Guves da better excushe neksht time atharwaish ai take all eur cashe.

-Janus

Yesh!

A romanteek yet mathamatik storysh in two panelsh.

Enjoy. Becaush aphtar thish I only takes cashe.

-Janus

YESH!

I ij bak aftaar da bhery long mathamatiksh convenshaan in Aphreeka.

I takes long time to caam because I banging the heads of da aathar silly silly boysh who dishagreesh weeth mai theorem of creatingsh da black hole bai dividing bai jero.

First classh of shemeshtaar is Comprehenshaan class.

I emails da koschen to you.

PLEJ SHOLVES AND CAAM NEXT DAY. YOU NO MANAGE I EXPLAINSH AGAIN HOW TO SOLVE. SHTEEL NO MANAGE I BANGS EUR HEAD.

*bell rings*

Thank eu boysh.
:3

-Janus

I am giving lecture on sexual innuendos... very good lecture .. must attend

Examples
I'm gonna put my wiener in your buns.”
~ Hot dog vendor on innuendo
“Can I butter your muffin?”
~ Waiter on innuendo
“First we'll get hammered, then we'll screw.”
~ Carpenter on innuendo
“Double the entendre, double the pleasure.”
~ English teacher on innuendo
“I've got more wood than you can handle.”
~ Woodworker on innuendo
“Oh s**t, it erupted prematurely...”
~ Volcano tour guide on innuendo
“I'm going to inject you with my special fluid now!”
~ Doctor on innuendo
“Notice how hard and firm this ram is.”
~ Farmer on innuendo
“Forward and back, forward and back... excellent technique.”
~ Football commentator on innuendo
“I want you to empty your junk into my box!”
~ Charity worker on innuendo
“I'm going to fill you in, baby. Every last bit of you.”
~ Dentist on innuendo
“You may feel a small prick...”
~ Doctor (again) on innuendo
“Just wait a minute while I get my balls out...”
~ Golfer on innuendo
“Would you like a lick of my lollipop, little girl?”
~ Shopkeeper on innuendo
“The second coming is imminent.”
~ Priest on innuendo
“Oh, I'll nail your rack alright. I'll nail it nice and hard.”
~ Handyman on innuendo
“Now grab the knob...”
~ Driving instructor on innuendo
“These are some hard buns!”
~ McDonald's customer on innuendo
“Now all we have to do is get it... In?”
~ Pinkie Pie on innuendo
“I'll be going out and coming in frequently”
~ Career criminal on innuendo
“My package has got your name on it!”
~ Postman on innuendo
“I pwn on this game, all with my hands and my joystick.”
~ Video game nerd on innuendo
“And here is a lovely pair of tits...”
~ Birdwatcher on innuendo
“I had to come inside through the back door.”
~ Delivery man on innuendo
“They're huge popsicles. I can barely fit them in my mouth.”
~ Popsicle Vendor on innuendo
“So that'll be two teabags and a spitroast, with a cr****ie to finish. Excellent choice.”
~ Waiter on innuendo

The masters of sexual innuendo

Study these phrases well, given by the master debators themselves, for they can barely contain their innuendic load before it is gushes forth will the full force of comedic thrust.
“Ho, ho, ho! Here comes Santa!”
~ Santa Claus
a.k.a "The Midnight Prowler"
“If you've been a good girl, I'll be coming down your chimney tonight!”
~ Santa Claus
a.k.a "The Silent Crime" Santasack
“If you've been a bad boy, I'll be coming down your chimney tonight!”
~ Santa Claus
a.k.a "The Artful Throbber"
“Ho, ho, ho, children! Who wants to feed Rudolf?”
~ Santa Claus
a.k.a "The Backdoor Bandit"
“Do you want a ride on my sleigh little girl?”
~ Santa Claus
a.k.a "The Red Ravage"
“Ho, ho, ho, little boy, have I got a surprise for you!”
~ Santa Claus
a.k.a "The Jolly Menace"
“Is this where all of the bad girls live?!”
~ Santa Claus
a.k.a "Two Big Lumps Of Coal"
“My sack's going to be empty when I'm finished with you!”
~ Santa Claus
a.k.a "Credit Where It's Due"
“When I come, I'm going to fill both your stockings!”
~ Santa Claus
a.k.a. "A Hard Delivery"
“Let's see what's waiting for you under the tree, kids!”
~ Santa Claus
a.k.a "Giver Of Gifts"
“Who wants to see me mount Rudolf?”
~ Santa Claus
a.k.a "Animal Lover"
“I'm going to violate you with my pen*s.”
~ Santa Claus
a.k.a "No Bulls**t"

Controversy

Over the years, several upstanding members of society have stood erect in the firm opinion that sexual innuendo has tainted the virginal waters of comedy with its rapid, repeated pe*******on into mainstream humour. These opinions grew in popularity over time, starting off slow but getting progressively faster and faster, reaching a climax around '69. Since then, such opinions have slid in and out of popular acceptance. However, most modern-day comedians agree that a good, firm grasp of the subject is needed in order to tackle the fact that it's once again getting harder and harder to do sexual innuendo properly. Some even think that all previously used jokes should be rolled up and thrown away in order to avoid spawning unwanted bastard child jokes which might result from reuse.

I need papers to be submitted tomorrow, assignment - if you don't do it I'll come ram you so hard you won't know what hit you... of course srijon will raep :D :D

Today's Anniversary
July 22: Oh, my God! It's National Hysteria Day, and you HAVEN'T MADE ANY PLANS!
0 - Scientist decide the Earth is round, not flat. This is proven wrong when a sailor "falls" of the world and is never seen again.
1066 - King Harold inaugurates National Hysteria Day with his famous speech "Holy s**t! It's the fu***ng Normans! AAAAAAAAA!"
1855 - An brief cease-fire is called in the Crimean War until Lord Raglan gets his sobbing under control.
1929 - Dozens of stockbrokers and bankers leap out of windows in wild National Hysteria Day celebration.
1966 - Australian Prime Minister Sir Robert Menzies celebrates the nine hundredth anniversary of National Hysteria Day by running around in circles, screaming.
1986 - Copious amounts of vodka-induced partying causes several employees of the Chernobyl nuclear power plant to hysterically panic when the reactor can't handle the sound system. They take out a few control rods to compensate the drain on the power grid.
1990 - Media outlets report the outbreak of a deadly virus in the United States. Thirty-eight people die of panic attacks from the announcement, and two people are killed by the virus itself.
2006 - TOTAL FU***NG HYSTERIA!!!
-Prof. Bedeiste-Whodunnit

Yesh.
Aftaar very long laanch break, FSCL ij bak.
And all of aash techaars, we make lots of memes and teach onko okaysh?
-Janus

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eFpXejKKmeo


-Obhro
the guest lecturer.

Short Film - Lovisodes : "First Love" Disclaimer : Smoking is injurious to health. https://www.facebook.com/nautankicompany2778 If you liked it, one share won't cost you much time.

Thats da mai eeshtudent! :')
-Janus

Jon tryingsh his da luck in da onko class.
-Janus

Yesh. Prof Paedo introduce da new items at canteen!
Hot and Spicy Chicks phor da 60/-
Shaats aap and takes my moneys!
-Janus