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You've gotta let go of your worries sometimes..

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Episode 11: Leap
“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity , it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair.”
This was all I could think of my experience this year.
Its all over now.No more unnecessary drama, no more frustration, no more her. This semester has been fun and as well been hell for me.Is it the wonderful result from the previous semester's exam?, the new job I found?, the new babes i've encountered?, the bad experience at work?, or that night?.
I didn't want to go home but I had to due to the seasons of all seasons and have lot of people expecting my return.
The journey back home wasn't boring, thanks to Jeff who has been keeping me company for about two months. Through out his stay, we've been touring around and attending events and this alone made me realize myself better.
On the journey back home, my mind went back to that night.. The unforgettable night.. The night I had my first and ever French kiss.. The night I experience an intense romance.
She was a fresher and my namesake, beautiful, a bit fair and short. Adeola understood my plight at first site.. She tutored me and advised me whenever I was troubled not until I asked her to kiss me one night. I remember this kiss so vividly cause technically I was tricked into it. I regretted this action of mine...not just because of the kiss but the romance aspect. I ended that friendship and never took my time to see her.
I didn't notice we've gotten to the last bus stop not until the passengers were getting off the bus.
"Urghhh.... This boring place again ".. I thought quietly.

Episode 10 ; unexpected appearance
"It is easy to hate and it is difficult to love. This is how the whole of scheme of things works. All good things are difficult to achieve ;and bad things are very easy to get".
Singing, praying and dancing is all I do each night since when i got back to school. Everything is new and different. New class, New faces,shelter. Although I was left in a crossroads of destiny. I didn't know what to choose between right and wrong. Whitney on my mind and a comeback too.
A week before,I had a chat with Queen, and we kinda settled things thinking all will be well again.
At school, we later became neighbours at school.
Unfortunately, she made me frustrated and....and I did it again.I got blamed and insulted her. I couldn't believe I forgot Whitney and everything.
I remained an unknown human and left to walk alone. I feel inferior but superior inside of me.
I had this hatred for girls but I later got stricken again.
Stupid me

Episode 9 : CAPITAL LETTERS
"Love makes the heart beat faster, causing emotional earthquake, and brings in disaster".
On a Saturday evening, I grabbed my phone and called her. I called her to make sure she hasn't forgotten about our outing (the date). "Yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh". I shouted while putting on my headphone to listen to "burn so bright "by Bella Thorne.
As soon as I ended the call, I started checking my wares to find a good cloth that will match the outing with Whitney but i couldn't find my taste but i later settled for a White Polo with blue denim jean.
*
By 8:45, I was already at the garage , I left my hostel with just #15,200. (cmon!.. What do you expect from a hustling student). At the garage , I made sure I called her to know what's up.
*
At exactly 10:00 am, I was dropped off at my destination. From the far distance, I could see the gigantic "Justrite". I moved on and entered the gate and rechecked my... "Oh my jeez... What the hell!..I shouted silently after seeing a huge brownish color stain behind my polo shirt. I headed for a boutique immediately and spent quarter of the money I held. I bought a royal blue shirt and this was far more better than the previous.
Exactly 11:00 pm, I was there... That was actually the time we scheduled for ourselves. I entered, gazed at the people eating, talking and standing in the restaurant. I saw her... She was so perfect... Especially the all in black attire, she wore a black gown, black earrings, black necklace with a blue diamond at the middle, black heel with silver stripes. A black angel I'll call her. She was backing me but I knew it was her. I was about touching her when she turned to my direction that lead to a coincidental gaze. "Oh my....touch of black lipstick ". I said silently. I felt like placing my natural black lips on her artificial darkened lips( what was I thinking?)but it's gonna be too early. We were directed to one of the empty sits and quickly move over to draw her sit for her(I'm sure I acted like a gentleman). She checked the menu given to her by the waiter and requested for vegetable salad. i requested for the same meal and while eating, our conversation went this way...
Jemma : you looking very beautiful Whitney.
Whitney : Awwwn.. Thank you.. You don't look bad either.
Jemma : thank you...hope your journey to this place wasn't stressful?
Whitney : (chuckled) nah!.. It wasn't... Hmmmm.... It seems someone has forgotten that this is still my neighborhood.. I don't live far.
Jemma : ohh.. I'm sorry about that and I think that someone is forgetting to serve us our meal.
Immediately I summon for the waiter and he served us. We ate, chatted and laughed through out.
Minutes later, I told her I was going to visit the toilet but instead, I went behind the stage to meet the orchestra players. I got to the stage, grab a guitar (even though I ain't good at, but I've got backups).
"Ladies and gentlemen, cam I have your attention please. I'm here to single a special song by Grant Gustin to the most beautiful female here (I pointed towards Whitney). I noticed that look on her face, more of a surprised look.
*
After singing "running home to you".. She was damn too excited and the rest of the people to. Immediately I started singing "capital letters" by Hailee Steinfield.
It was their first time hearing a male's version of that song. They danced and danced and I knew that I have to join the merriment.
*
Later on, we went to a jewelry shop and I got her a silver wristwatch. We had photoshoots of different styles and we played games in an arcade game center.
Finally, it 7:00 pm, home calls . we were walking down a street, her head resting on my shoulder. We stopped to wait for a commercial transporter.
Meanwhile, we talked about our day and expressed ourselves. Now is the time.. The moment I've been waiting for...There was this silence between us.. But I had this urge and I knew she had it too, our head moving closer and.....and.....
"Jeeeeez!..... What's all this I can't believe it's a dream "... I thought quietly. I looked around and found out that I was still at my gramps place. I went back to bed with tears and sadness.

Episode 8: garbled

"Love without love
Is like a tree without blossoms of fruits."
(You might probably think the last episode had a happy ending... Cmon..I myself didn't know I was gonna end back to square one).

A month gone now, I thought I had started a new love story. I didn't know that I was fooling myself.
Bambi by jidenna was the song... It was the particular song I was listening to not until I received this terrifying message from her on Facebook.
"Falling in love with you is not hard trust me.... I don't want this, I'm still a mess".
(Cmon I'm sure you know what that means!) ... I wasn't too sure at first but I didn't bother to ask because I understood it perfectly well.
I felt the itch in my hands to write this...
"I actually didn't know where exactly I was going
And I just kept on rolling. Nobody ever told me the final chapter of the story.
I thought we would burn so bright.
And bring other people back to life.
I thought the darkest sky can't stop you and I tonight
I have walked alone with the stars and the moon at night
I have walked alone no one by myself ".
*
Well I was hurt and not hurt as well. Whitney... She's a great person. She was a better girl for me to be with(that was what I felt earlier). Her beauty alone is unspeakable but to bad, I've got no pride in it.
I had to go to gramps place, his place is so quiet that you can hear the sound of the drop of a pin. I knew I had to think and is residence is the best. On my way, I saw a company of soldiers patrolling. Being a soldier was my ambition when I was kid..always enticed with their shoes.
Getting into the parlor, memories, flowing like waters in my head. Dad's pictures hanged on the walls of the parlor. I couldn't resist it... I had to, i had to wet my eyes.

Episode 7: start of something new
"Who's she?". I asked with anxiety. "Do I know her?.. And what's her name? "..
"You can't.. She's kinda far from us". Flash added. "She's a member and Whitney by name".
I couldn't keep my eyes off her,i kept on watching the same footage over and over again. I asked for her contact and Facebook identity but he turned deaf ears to me. I knew it from the core of my bosom that something in me has changed but I couldn't figure it out. I came online that night and searched for her name and It took me hours to fish out her identity. I sent a request and few minutes later, it was accepted.
I felt renewed and this feeling hasn't overwhelmed me since the last time I saw Queen.This went on for weeks and I got happier in each passing day.
I got confused on what I really wanted. I haven't seen this girl and I'm going gaga over her .The more I tried to keep her of my mind, the more Flash says good things about her. "She's a hotshot and a whizz ". He added.
**********************
On a hot afternoon, I was at Jeff's house discussing about a particular movie.
Suddenly, Flash came knocking. "She said she's coming over ". He said panting heavily. "I tried to keep her from coming but she's actually almost here"
I was shocked, didn't know what to do, I wasn't prepared to see her. I remembered telling her that we were gonna meet on a particular day, which is gonna be a date. I ran home to shower and change my wares.
*****************************
She finally came and we went directly to the river to kill the boredom. Although, I didn't say a word to her due to my timid attitude, thanks to Jeff and Flash who were still a conversant type.
Hours later,she left and I was left to blame myself for my awkward attitude .
"Wow...she's different". I said with a smile on my face. "Wish I had met her earlier".
"Yeah.. You wished... but you can't have her". Flash added. "You think Whitney is like any other girl?. She's extremely different and she having her own taste. well.. One can't tell.. You might be the Mr. Right for her".
I replied him with a giggle before running home to prepare dinner.
"hmmm......maybe..maybe not".

Episode 6: grief and relief
"Good relationships are like 🎄"
One thing I've learnt in life is to accept what you can't change and change what you can't accept.
A month gone now and I have been thinking, looking, crying and listening to solemn music. I grabbed my pen and started writing to try pouring out my feelings but it didn't work.

"For you I waited
Now I am wasted
For you I gave my effort
Now you tell me to get lost
For you I tried to be real
But to you now I am weak
For your loads I help to carry
But you hardly wish me to be happy".
"Cmon what wrong with you". I thought to my self "she's has been your worst distraction and you are here waisting your time thinking over someone who doesn't even know you exist! ".
I knew I had to change, she's gone and not ready to receive any apology from me. This isn't the first breakup.. I stopped counting at the thirtieth 30 time. I had to wake up. I've got to prepare for the upcoming exam 📝.
I got relieved and studied hard but I knew something was missing,... Yeah I know now...I and queen read 📘 together all the time.. " I'm into you "I said quietly.
********************
Exams are over and everyone's priority is leave for home.
"Knock knock"... I opened to check but surprised to see her. She came to inform me about she going home and her mum wanting us to come home together.
I had to leave with her due to her mum's request.
Hours later, we got to our neighborhood and departed.
"See jemma! ". Francisco raised an alarm to the others. I was so happy to see them and I received hot shakes and they didn't seem to care if I was tired or not. I met a new friend called phil, who's theirs. I knew being with this guys will put a happy face on me and I'll be able to overcome the grief.
They complained of my complexion and stature. I explained how my life was at school and the breakup. They were disappointed as expected except for Francisco who insulted my foolishness.
Days later, Flash recorded some footages at the assembly he attended. In the video, I saw how happy they were but someone in this footage caught my eye.

Episode 5; Abyss of passion.
Attending the same tertiary institution with queen has been one of my wishes. Being by her side and her shield is all I wanted.
I've been back from the hospital for about a week and I haven't set my eyes on Queen. "I miss her". I thought to myself, staring at a picture we shot at a wedding. "Oh cmon jemma, you should be with her not staring at a lifeless picture ". immediately, I got into my favorite hood and left for her place.
**************************
"Whoa, you're baaack". She screamed while running to give a hug. We hugged then kissed for almost two minutes before we got interrupted by her mom's footsteps.
An hour later, I was dining with them and as well listening to an advice of a proud mother who's son is leaving for school. She was glad that I and her daughter are at the same school and had the assurance that I would look after her.
*******************
The first three weeks at school was so frustrating due to some certain registrations . Upon the frustrations , I felt real true love with Queen. She was so sweet to be with and it was like paradise to me. Though she had her own shortcomings but I loved her that way.
Months went by, I discovered a change, not with her characters but changes towards me. I had the feeling that it could be due to me not having enough. I buy her things but maybe she expected more. She embarrasses me most times in public and this alone breaks me. she had this stillborn pride, arrogance, adamancy I apologize to her on every misunderstandings we had even if I wasn't at fault , sacrificed most of my time for her but it's still nothing to her.
She possessed this stillborn pride,arrogance, adamant, and too insulting. I became too blind too notice and react.
This happened weeks after weeks not until I hit her on one faithful day. Now I've done wrong, broken my vow and will never be forgiven.
I was disliked by my friends just because I didn't listen to their advice on chasing after other girls. Lots of girls gives me body languages and wanted me to give them attention but I turned them down. I was so committed and believed she would change.
On a Tuesday evening, Queen and I were having dinner together at her place. "I would love to get married immediately after I'm done with school, to a rich guy, you know... He should have a house of his own and a car". She said proudly. "Infact i wanna date someone more older and has a car now".
"Why talking about guys with cars now ". I asked with seriousness. "And what are you insinuating? ".
"You heard me right". She added quickly. "Cmon stop saying trash". I replied with a muffled voice. " if you're saying all this this then what about me? ".
"Find another girl and date her, I quit". She said unmannerly. "Infact I've done that a long time ago, leave me in peace. I'm too young to date and I aint ready for nonsense".
"I don't understand, are you leaving me cause you want someone else or cause you're too young? ". I asked with this pitiful look. " we both know you ain't too young and I don't give you any problem that would make you wanna leave".
"Pls let me be and I'll do likewise, I wanna stay away from all this, I'm tired of everything, you and and your family. I hate you all.". She shouted, closing the door behind her. "It over between us. Don't forget to close that mouth and lock the door before leaving".

My name is jemma oloye
I'm the most emotional guy alive
To the outside world
I'm just an ordinary guy who believes love can rule the world
But secretly with my thought,
I fight this emotional distress and other negative qualities in me
But still yet I'm not being appreciated for who I am and what I'm doing
That's why I'm called

Episode_4 - "The awaken "...
Love can change the world just as it changes the mind.
Bro Deola!.. Bro Deola!!.. "Can you see me?" I nodded my head as a reply. "Thank goodness you're awake". She said with happiness. She turned to Gold and asked her to get our mother. "You've been unconscious for almost six months now"she added with a soothe voice. I gave her an awkward look in return. "What do you mean six months?... and why am I in a hospital?". I don't really know the whole story but mum will give you the full details, I'm just glad that you're awake".
I tried to remember what happened but the more I try, the more my head hurts. All I could remember was my head about to be chopped off but... It was just a dream... I can't believe I was dreaming all this while. I kept on trying to unravel the puzzles in my thought and didn't bother to listen to my sister's locution. I turned to my mom who just entered with tears rolling down her cheeks. "Mom.. Is this some kind of joke or what?... six months?".
"Yes my son, for six months now we've all been fasting and praying for you". Mom plied with a shaking voice.
There was a concerted rush to my ward. "Jemma is awake". The one who was leading shouted. I had this look of dismay. "Jeez.. Flash! "...I said. "Yeah bro, welcome back". Behind him stands Jeff who was giving me an admiring look with the artificial twins, faith and samzy smiling. Fidelis and Francisco came in last.
"Flash you disappointed me oo, you told him welcome back without asking of how is journey was". Francisco replied to flash's statement which made everyone bursting into laughter.
Immediately, everyone paused and asked with anxiety. "What happened to you?". "I can't really remember" I said. "All I could was that I was on my way home and I found a limousine parked outside the gate of the house. I got distracted by a thick voice and I looked behind me to see who it was but I got hit instead and...that's all".
"No wonder!" Mum said soothingly. "Aunt Josephine complained of some of her expensive goods stolen from her limousine, the glass got broken and I think it was your head that was used". "Indeed, it's a miracle I'm alive "I said. "But where is she now?"
"She left three months ago after waiting for you to get conscious again but she had to leave to continue what she started". "But don't worry". She assured me. "She will come back for you ". "She shouldn't come back for me, I don't wanna go to Kenya anymore". I thought to myself. "I wanna be with Queen".
The nurse came in with a polite look on her face. "You're gonna be discharged tomorrow but make sure your medications are with you before leaving". Everyone was so glad to hear the good news. Mum followed the nurse out and some people left to buy some food while Jeff and my sisters stayed behind.
"Guess what?". He said with an exciting look. I listened, a look of interest on my face. "You've been given an admission into laspotech, likewise Queen also.