RansomArt

Anyone looking to our chase some photos? Digital downloads, canvass, metal and paper prints are available 🥰 I have all kinds of photos to choose from. Landscapes, Gettysburg and more.

Double rainbow after this crazy storm

This looks like a good spot to be right now 🥰 throw back to out trip to Tybee Island.

So my online portfolio is finished for now. I'm sure I will do some tweaking and such. Just click the link below.

If you see something you would like to purchase let me know. I can get you paper, canvas, metal, and acrylic prints. Send me an email or private message and we can discuss any details 🥰.

https://ransomartgbg.myportfolio.com/

Help out an aspiring Artist

So as many of you know I had my work displayed in a gallery alongside Frank Lee Ruggles this past year. I received many of the pieces back. They are for sale and can send you images of them or your welcome to come see them.

Below I have posted all of the images that were in the Gallery. I am offering to sell prints, metal prints and acrylic options of these images. If interested let me know!

I am working on an online portfolio and hope to have it ready soon!

I sell many of my photos to those looking to change their decor, love history, need some serenity added to their life, etc.

So I know a select few of you have known the details of my life as of late. Needless to say things have been turned upside down and inside out and then thrown through a blender. Or at least that's how it feels. Anyway, since its Su***de Awareness Month, I want to share my story.
Before I dive in, I want to give a possible TRIGGER WARNING to anyone who has experienced depression, anxiety, su***de, and trauma.
Those of you that know me well know that I served in the US Army. During that I suffered from some seizures that caused some serious memory loss and other health issues. Due to this I had to medically retire from the Army. Since then I have suffered from depression and self esteem and anxiety off and on through the years. My memories that I had lost had come back in pieces but not everything had/has returned.
Over the last year or so I have struggled with not feeling like myself. I could not pinpoint the cause. Nothing serious had been going on.
One night I had a very vivid dream. A dream that scared me. A nightmare that felt all too real and never wanted to have again. Over the next month or so the nightmare became a memory that I started relive in my head constantly. I started to have what is total recall. This is where someone who has experienced a very traumatizing event their brain erased it to preserve its mental state. With all of the emotions and thoughts and memories rushing back it felt like it happened that day. Despite that it happened 9 years ago, in my mind it happened now. My mind was reliving a military sexual trauma that happened during training 9 years ago.
Because of the overwhelming emotions and feelings of wanting the pain to stop, thoughts of su***de began to enter my head. More and more frequently. I told Ken one day that I couldn't handle it anymore. We ended up calling Veterans Crisis line which was not easy. I started having a panic attack and almost hung up several times. These people couldn't possibly understand what I was going through! We came up with a safety plan for the night and the next day Ken drove me to the Martinsburg VA ER.
The plan was to admit me for a couple days to kind of reset and then figure what to from there. We get there. They take us back for triage. Not at all very caring. Felt cold and rushed. I was terrified. I was told I couldn't have my phone on the psych floor so I gave to Ken thinking I was going to be going upstairs soon. They barely give us time to hug and say goodbye. Ken leaves the VA and heads home to our kiddos thinking that I was going to be admitted right away and getting the help I needed.
I was taken back to the ER. I was approached by a nurse that also had black and purple hair and tattoos. She made me feel a little more at ease. She took me right to a restroom. I had put on two gowns and hospital socks. I had to give up all of my jewelry, hair tie, shoes, everything. I felt very vulnerable and cold walking through the ER. They took my bag of belongings and put them in a closet. The psych room that is reserved for psych patients in the ER was taken by some drunk guy so I ended up sitting in in the ER by the nurses station with a hospital table to hold my small styrafoam cup of water. Again I am in the ER for suicidal thoughts due to a sexual trauma. I am riddle with anxiety. I am rocking and rubbing my thighs and bouncing my legs. I'm on high alert. I feel very exposed. I also don't want to be left alone. 1 hour later a dr comes and talks to me out in the open, no privacy and gives me something to calm my nerves. At this point, I wish I still had my phone. 2 hours go by and I still have yet to see a social worker. I am still not put in a room because I don't want to be alone and they don't have a room in eye shot of the nurse desk. I finally see a social worker, they go through the typical routine questions and then tell they have no beds available upstairs. Due to preparing for a covid surge. So because of this they have to send me to Clarksburg VA which is 3 hours away. My anxiety instantly sky rockets. I just wanted Ken there. I wanted to just walk out. The only way I could contact him was walking to the nurses station to borrow their phone. I knew I needed the help and being home wasn't an option for me at that time. So we decided as much as we hated it to go through with it. So another 2 hours go by and I get a ride in an ambulance to Clarksburg, VA. I arrive at 230 in the morning. Two nurses greet me and have me change into a pair of pants and button up scrubs. Which make me feel more covered and finally warm. They give me a blanket as well. We get upstairs and they do their initial intake and then I get to call Ken to let him know I arrived ok.
They take me to my room. Its large. Im alone. a single bed that is fastened to the floor. A shelf that is bolted to the wall and made of that child safe plastic that wont hurt you if you hit it. The shelf had a small paper cup with tooth paste squirted into it and a tooth brush the size of my pinky. Another paper cup with a body wash that is supposed to be for your hair too. No comb or hair brush. The bed is firm. The blanket is sewn into the mattress cover and the pillow is something to be desired. The bathroom had one of those plastic gymnast mats with magnets on the sides as a door. The shower had one temp, luke warm and it was a push button shower that lasted 3 minutes at a time. So needless to say showers were quick. again no hair brush so you can imagine the hair situation. I had one amazing nurse, who was a biker 🙂, brought be a few t shirts with motorcycles on them to wear instead of the long sleeve scrubs and brought me underwear. I hadn't been given any the whole time. Those little gestures meant the world to me.
So I stayed for a few days. It was a good reset. I was able to get mind straight to go home and start the healing process. During my stay I was diagnosed with PTSD due to MST (military sexual trauma) and depression with high functioning anxiety.
I finally get the go ahead to come home. The VA sets up to have me driven 5 hours home to my doorstep. I am grateful for that.
I am home.
I am starting the healing process. Its going to be a tough road. I struggle going to public places. I panic when people are behind me. I have had to teach myself grounding exercises. I wear an anxiety ring. Everyday is different. Some days I am strong and confident and ready to fight the world and other days I feel defeated.
I want you all to know its ok to feel this way. Its ok to ask for help. Its ok to not be ok.
Thank you Ken for being my ride or die. I love you so much.
Thank you to those of you that have helped us during this process it means a lot!
Su***de Prevention Hotline (800)-273-8255

https://www.facebook.com/1506044406350632/posts/3070083366613387/?d=n

Beautiful green after the rain 🥰

https://youtu.be/A2tWJzGm9oY

Frank Lee Ruggles Memoral