reclaim_your_mental_health

Obsessing about negative thoughts

It’s very hard to be around people who can’t or won’t let go of negativity when they dwell on and speak so much about the terrible things that could happen and have happened, the slights they’ve suffered, and the unfairness of life. These people stubbornly refuse to see the positive side of life and the positive lessons from what’s transpiring. Pessimism is one thing, but remaining perpetually locked in negative thoughts is another. Only seeing the negative, and operating from a view that everything is negative and against you, is a unhealthy way of thinking and living and you can change that.

The Three minds
Which one do you gravitate towards more?

Throughout the years working with families and children in the community, I was able to assess and observe the family dynamic, patterns and structure of the unique way each family system interacts with each other including hierarchies and roles. One of the things I most often seen was the lack of involvement of fathers in the lives of their children. Meaning, they live in the same household but are not involved in any part of their childrens life physically or emotionally. When I asked some fathers why, most just laugh and shrug their shoulders and undeniably respond by saying that’s what the mother is for. Who’s going to put food on the table if I don’t work? It doesn’t matter how many hours a day you work or how many days a week you work, It’s all about the sincerity of your efforts and the CONNECTION you make between you and your child. It’s about setting your PRIORITIES straight and BALANCING yourself. Anyone can father a child but being a dad takes a lifetime. Being a father means you have to be INVOLVED in order to have a positive impact on the lives of your children. Being involved can have a large impact on a child and help shape him or her into the person they become. Fathers, like mothers, are pillars in the development of a child’s emotional well-being. Children look to their fathers to lay down the rules and enforce them. They also look to their fathers to provide a feeling of security, both physical and emotional. Children want to make their fathers proud and an involved father promotes inner growth and strength and instills and overall sense of well-being and self confidence.

Forgiveness is a gift we give ourselves. It’s intentional and voluntary. It doesn’t mean you’re obligated to stay in a relationship or marriage with someone who has destroyed the foundation of everything you’ve built. Forgiveness doesn’t mean you have to keep a close friendship with the person who betrayed you. Forgiveness doesn’t mean you continue to engage with family members who have proven their disloyalty, time and time again. Forgiving someone doesn’t mean you’re no longer hurt. Forgiving someone does not make you weak, but gives you strength. Strength enough to let go, to move on, and to put that person in your past.

Forgiveness means we’re letting go of grudges for the sake of Allah. Forgiving the mistakes of others, so that Allah forgives us too.
Accepting what wrongs have been done to you, you let go of those wrongs, with or without that person, it’s up to you.

Forgiveness doesn’t mean you should forget the incident ever happened.

And sometimes, forgiveness doesn’t mean you have to continue to include the person in your life…

Forgiveness is basically for YOU. To help you move on…

Some tips to improve family communication.

First take some time away from your busy schedule to have a talk with your family members.

Listen to what the other person is saying and ask how the other person is feeling.

Ask how the conflict made them feel and talk about how it made you feel too.

If you are having trouble understanding what they are saying, repeat back what the other person says.

Do not hold grudges, get defensive or give cold shoulders.

Don’t bring up past issues, deal only with the present.

Attack the problem, not each other

Don’t let your pride or ego take over the conversation

Poor communication leads to false assumptions, feeling you can read their minds, or always jumping to conclusions.

Poor communication can also include yelling, keeping secrets, blaming, giving the silent treatment, using ultimatums or threats, labeling someone bad instead of the behavior, and bringing harm. If these problems continue, you will never feel close to your family anymore instead you will continue to push each other away.

Show that you understand how they feel. Don’t minimize the person’s feelings by saying they are being dramatic or wrong for feeling how they feel. Otherwise, they will not talk to you again. Speak the way that you would want someone to speak to you. It is important to keep that line of communication going so that you can have a healthy relationship with your family.

Mothers are the epitome of love, sacrifices me strength. She can take the place of all others but no one can take her place. Happy Mother’s Day to all the warriors out there. ♥️♥️♥️

Reminder:
You can’t always count on others to respect your feelings, even if you respect theirs. Being a good person doesn’t guarantee that others will be good people or good to you. You only have control over yourself and how you choose to be as a person. self-respect comes from learning and knowing who you are, loving and taking care of yourself. As for others you can choose to accept them or just walk away. Whatever you choose, do it respectfully.

Mindfulness is the ability to be fully present and aware of what’s going on around us . Mindfulness is a quality every human being already has. We just have to learn how to access it.

Core self is your true self, or most authentic self.” It is our “inner wisdom, inner nurturer, wise self, feeling self, inner voice…

Connecting with your core self
In reality, is about staying positive and avoiding vulnerability. Check in and assess yourself from time to time. For example, think about the things you value, what your strengths are and what you’re most afraid of.
Assessing your core self helps to identify your needs but most importantly is taking the steps to meet those needs.

Feeding our soul in Ramadan♥️

Refreshes our faith, increases our spiritual focus and mental comfort and brings peace and calmness in our hearts.

Be patient with yourself. If you don’t have the energy today learn why and make the necessary adjustments. ♥️♥️