Conscious Parent Coach - Anja Jaskolski

It’s hard when we see our child sad and frustrated. But if we go quickly into trying to cheer them up and make them feel happy again we are also not present with them in their experience just in this moment.

There is nothing more satisfying for a child to be seen, held and supported by their parents for what they are experiencing in the moment. Easy or challenging. Through us and how we respond they learn how to relate to those experiences in life themselves.

If we unconsciously distract and want to fix so immediately a difficult situation for our child the question is how do we relate to our own feelings of sadness or frustration?

The more we can be, feel and give space to our own feelings and know how to regulate ourselves the more present we can be with our children, helping them to navigate their feelings.

In this way we avoid giving our children unconsciously the message that what they are feeling is not desirable. We prevent to form a pattern of distracting and suppressing feelings because we show them that we can give space for all feelings.

How is it for you when your little one has a hard time?

From my heart to yours 💕
Anja

Warmly welcome to my healing space ♡

I'm a Life Coach and Jikiden Reiki Therapist with nearly 10 years of Reiki experience specialized on early attachment trauma healing.

Trauma means 'wound'. Early attachment wounds can impact the way how we relate and respond in our closest bonding relationships; with our partner and our child.

Early attachment wounds are often unconscious and passed down from generation to generation...until they are processed.

If you want to become a mother or father it's important that you begin your healing journey before you have children. You want to make sure that you have build up emotional stability and a healthy connection with yourself and your partner before a child comes into your life.

Because as soon as you become a parent your own unprocessed early wounds will get triggered by your child and unless you are aware of that and found compassion within yourself you might inevitably go into survival and become emotionally unavailable or worse will react with strong emotions like anger towards your child which you will regret as soon as you come out of overwhelm.

I can guide you to become the parent that you want to be and build a close and healthy connection to yourself, your partner and your child. I celebrate you for making this step.

My guidance can support you in finding relief from acute or chronic emotional and physical symptoms through deep self-discovery and development, restorative relaxation, nervous system & emotional regulation, release of deeply stored stress, suppressed feelings and pain.

My approach is cause-oriented and natural guiding you to wholesome health & wellbeing. In person & via distance/online.

I’m looking forward to connecting with you and warmly invite you to message me or have a free 1:1 discovery call with me to talk about your intention and clarify your questions.

From my heart to yours ♡

Anja

"I have been able to uncover parts of myself that were needed for integration while working with Anja. She is skilled and is able to offer the level of compassion that I need to help me open. Thank you Anja. This work is unique and helps to facilitate re wiring deep subconscious patterns. I recommend it!" Tonya D.

"I luckily found Anja at my time of crisis. She was caring, kind, and intuitive to my needs when I had a hard time expressing how I was feeling. When she practised Reiki on me I released a lot of stored emotions from my body. When our session was over I felt I could finally relax after being in an intense fight or flight state. I am grateful that Anja guided me toward my own healing journey. I would highly recommend her to anyone seeking out REAL healing." Mekenzie C.

“I'm very grateful to have Reiki and Anja in my life! She was recommended by a friend during a time when I needed relaxation and healing. I didn't really know what to expect, but was happily surprised at how deeply relaxing and healing the experience was! It was a deeper release than any massage I've had. In just one session, it had a profound effect on my overall well-being, which unfolded over several weeks. I experienced a surprising release of emotion during the process and Anja took time to talk through it with me afterwards. She has a calm sense of open curiosity which allows the experience to unfold very naturally. The entire experience over several sessions has been gentle, and non-invasive, yet profoundly powerful and effective healing on every level.” Beth H.

"I have done several very profound self-encounters with Anja, followed by some wonderful Reiki to close the session and integrate the work, which I have really enjoyed. Each session has been a generous space of gentle care and support at every step, at a particularly challenging time. I highly recommend her work. Thank you Anja!" Clare M.

Do you know this fear of failure every day? When you constantly worry whether you are good enough as a mother and can give your child enough love?

I understand how overwhelming fear can be and how it prevents you from living in the here and now. But believe me, you are strong enough to overcome your fears.

You are the mother your child needs.
You are able to give the love and safety your child needs.

Let’s find ways together to overcome your fears and unfold your true potential. I am here to support and strengthen you on your path to inner peace, authenticity and confidence.

In my coaching you will learn what causes your insecurity and fear and how to overcome them to be the parent you want to be, whether you are in Nelson or online on the other side of the world.

Together we can end your day to day struggle, stress and overwhelm and create a new beginning.

How are you doing with motherhood/fatherhood? What are you afraid of? What do you want to finally overcome?

I look forward to hearing from you. Feel free to comment or send me a message.

From my heart to yours 💕
Anja

Mom, listen to your heart. If you don't feel ready to go to work and be away from your child, trust your natural, healthy maternal instinct. This not only shows that you are not ready, but also that your child is not ready.

It's difficult because you have to decide so early in your pregnancy, but once the little one arrives, everything changes.

Many moms I talk to start crying as soon as they tell me they have to go back to work soon and their child is often only a year old. It's hard and painful, and the pressure of having to go back to work puts new mothers in a terrible conflict.

Our economically driven society does not sufficiently recognize the importance of this deeply symbiotic, dependent, vulnerable and immensely formative phase for the healthy development of the child, the well-being of mother and child and the entire family.

But YOU can feel how important it is, right?

Allow yourself space to feel your feelings, your truth and explore what else is possible.

A mum that I’m supporting was struggling with this. In this case she approached her employer several times asking to work part time. Several times a ‘no’ but she was clear in her heart: either her employer supports her too or she will leave the job. Her last attempt was successful. She stood her ground and brought wellbeing and balance back to herself and her whole family.

If we want things in our society to change, we need to be the change. We can find the courage and confidence standing up for our needs. It’s worth it. You are worth it. I’m here to support you with this.

From my heart to yours 💕
Anja

When you compare yourself with other parents who seem to be so calm and relaxed all the time, you only look at a momentary picture.

Just like me posting this picture here from the mountain peak. I only share with you my success in reaching the destination, but the path was steep, partly uncomfortable and challenging. I needed breaks, look after myself and was afraid at times about the possibility of encountering a black bear or grizzly.

You don’t see my unique steps of my journey and what I have overcome. So, if you compare yourself and like what you see, be inspired and look into ways what you can do for yourself to get there.

From my heart to yours 💕
Anja

Send a message to learn more

There are different ways on how you can approach your symptoms. This relates to both the physical and emotional experiences.

You can see them as a problem, as an illness and as something you need to fix or get rid of. But you can also see your symptoms as messengers from your body and psyche, leading you inwards and to a deeper understanding of what you need in your current life situation to get back into balance.

Instead of focusing on and ‘chasing’ symptoms, alternative medicine has a holistic and cause-oriented approach that sees the human being as a complex microcosm and treats individual physical, psychological and spiritual complaints in the context of life experiences, lifestyle and environmental stresses and influences.

It acknowledges our bodies innate self healing abilities, that it is always striving to achieve balance and that symptoms are an attempt to restore this balance.

Alternative medicine is not a quick fix. It allows time to gently explore, uncover, release, nourish and integrate layer by layer back to our healthy radiant self.

Which alternative healing modality have you tried yet? What are your experiences? Please share in the comments.

From my heart to yours 💕
Anja

Being a parent is the most natural thing in the world. Just like a flower which innately knows how to grow, how to smell and how to be…your natural intuition in how to parent your child is within you.

Let your heart guide you where it needs love and healing, where it needs support in order to reconnect to your natural essence.

From my heart to yours 💕
Anja

As a mother of young children, do you need a break to do something for yourself, but feel guilty with the thought?

But at the same time you are on the verge of your emotional and physical capacity? You feel exhausted and just need a break.

This is normal, but not a reason to not look after yourself. Taking care of yourself is what makes the difference for your child as you will return feeling nurtured and rebalanced.

From my heart to yours 💕

Today is Aboriginal Day. 🪶🦅✨💕

It was really nice to join the community event organized by COINS (Circle of Indigenous Nations Society) in Castlegar with so many families and children running around having fun in the park.

I got to admire indigenous art, music, dance, meet wonderful people and could even join the story time in the tipi together with parents and their little ones learning about how the bee got her stinger. 🐝 🥰✨
My heart feels very drawn to connect more with our indigenous community, listen to their story, their wisdom and teaching. Similar to the Japanese culture the connection to nature and our home the earth, the honouring and gratitude resonates so deeply with me. I will share more with you as I’m going.

From my heart to yours 💕
Anja

What is something your dad always tells you?

“I love you.” — Kendra, age 15
“Be nice.” — Matthew, age 13
“I’m proud of you.” — Sebastian, age 17
“Funny stuff sometimes.” — Zoey, age 5
“Remember that I will always love you even when you don’t see me.” — Audrey, age 7
“To have fun, be safe, and make wise decisions.” — Aaron, age 16
“Unicorns live in San Diego.” — Lucy, age 11

On Sunday we honour & celebrate the loving, caring, supportive, and inspiring Daddies in our community. Thank you for all that you do.

If you know a dad in your life that you want to gift a deeply relaxing, stress and pain reducing and nurturing energy healing session for his wellbeing of body and mind. I have gift cards available. :)

https://anjajaskolski.janeapp.com/online_gift_cards/new

From my heart to yours 💕
Anja

*quotes from familylife.com

This day…this moment…this minute is unique and will never come again.

This day…this moment…this minute is your life.

From my heart to yours 💕
Anja

What I have learned over all these years from the people who came to me for support is that we all share the desire to live in and enjoy the present moment. We all want to enjoy our life in the here and now.

But when you are absorbed by your problems ~ day in and day out ~ days, weeks and months just fly by and you can’t even remember what you did. Your life is only happening in your head jumping from one thing to the other. You don’t notice much of your surroundings.

Look at this astonishing beauty of a rhododendron bush that just pulled me in beside a sidewalk! 😄☺️🌸

When you live in the present moment there are so many gifts for you, especially from nature, that can literally just make your day.

I hope you enjoy some time in nature on the weekend, slow down and connect with your heart.

From my heart to yours 💕
Anja

Are you open for a new beginning?🌷🌞🌿

The story of my client Nadine

Nadine is a mother of a little one year old. She just completed her first 3 month intensive with me. We worked together exclusively via distance.

“I was fortunate enough to have a three-month intensive coaching program with Anja. During this challenging time, Anja was my pillar of support and my compass, guiding me through turbulent emotional waters.

When we started the program, I was in a state of despair and overwhelm. I had just become a mother a few months ago and was struggling almost every day with motherhood and the difficulties of the relationship I was in at the time. I felt a lot of anger, grief, fear, was overwhelmed with my situation, was emotionally unstable, quickly involved in conflicts, and felt ashamed because I was afraid I wasn't a good mother.

In my first session with Anja, I was very desperate and I had no idea how things could get better at all. I had so many issues that I couldn't even name them clearly. From the outset, Anja was there for me with her sensitive nature and created a safe space where I didn't feel ashamed to share my feelings and thoughts. She helped me identify my central theme - setting boundaries.

We met online once a week for one to two hours, either for a self-encounter or for a Reiki session. For me, as a mother with a small baby, it's usually not easy to schedule appointments. Often things come up or go unplanned. The fact that the work with Anja was online was a great relief to me. The fact that I could be at home and still be accompanied by her was a blessing. Although our sessions were online, they were still very intensive.

After three months, I have experienced such a nice positive change in my life. I managed to separate from the burdensome relationship, I can now control my emotions better, I feel more confident and strengthened in my role as a mother. My anger, which was a nearly daily companion before, is practically gone. After months marked by fears, I finally have the feeling of being able to feel real joy again. I can set boundaries much better; I don't make other people's issues my own anymore. I can finally open my heart to my child, where before there was only despair, anger, and overwhelm.

The work with Anja was so fulfilling that I have decided to book another three months with her to work on other issues.

I can recommend Anja's coaching to any mom seeking a positive change in their life. It is a journey that brings challenges and tears, but I am so grateful to have taken this path. Thank you, Anja, for your support and guidance on my journey to myself.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It takes about 3 months for transformation to occur.

Sometimes months and years can go by and even though we try to address our issues it can feel as if we remain stuck and nothing is really changing in our life.

Week on week off we may find ourself struggling with similar issues in our relationship, with ourselves, at work, with our family etc. and it seems we are mainly absorbed by managing our problems than living or being present in our life.

Somehow we have lost ourselves but our heart keeps calling us to reconnect, to discover who we really are, what our wants and needs are and to live our authentic self without fear.

‘My Journey Back to Me’, is my 3-month 1:1 intensive program (in-person and via distance) to help people to reconnect with their heart and joy of life and to find back to their authentic, healthy and autonomous self.

This 13-week transformative journey includes:
🌼 1 x session weekly/biweekly - Self-Encounter or Jikiden Reiki session
🌼 1 x weekly 30 min. Integration support call
We will be in close contact each week about which session is suitable in regard to your present situation and needs.

Does this resonate with you?
Then just send me a private message or email me at [email protected] and we can schedule a free discovery call, get to know each other more and clarify your questions.

I currently have an opening for 2 new clients.
The price for the intensive is currently $2,200 CAD.
This special offer is valid only until May 19th. Then the price goes up to $2,400 CAD again.

I'm looking forward to supporting you.
From my heart to yours ♡
Anja

Here is my booking page with more information:
https://anjajaskolski.janeapp.com

💕 ON MOTHER’S DAY 💕
Give a mother in your life the gift of a relaxing and nurturing hour of Reiki.

Mothers need and deserve more support, more care and appreciation for raising tiny little humans into big humans. Her wellbeing emanates to her whole family.

Being a mother is sacred and her wellbeing is very important. I wish our society would recognize this further and offer them more support.

All you need to do is to send me a message for making an e-transfer about $100 for a mom. She can then book her 90 min. Reiki session via my booking link anjajaskolski.janeapp.com indicating who gifted her the session. If you live outside of Canada please just message me and I will guide you from there.

You can be sure this will make her day. 🥰

Thank you.

From my heart to yours 💕
Anja

Photo by Delaney Van on Unsplash

💗🌸💗

You need to feel safe in order to show your true self.

To look for safe people only cannot solve your problem. There can be the safest person in front of you, but you can still be easily triggered with something they said or how they looked at you that makes you retreat again and hide.

But when you begin to establish safety within yourself and create an authentic relationship towards you, you can express yourself freely towards others.

Then you can also recognize more clearly who is safe for you.

As within, so without.

What do you need to feel safe so you can be yourself?

I would love to hear from you in the comments or message.

From my heart to yours 💕
Anja

Trauma dissolves all time levels. There is no past, present and future anymore.

There is only past, past, past...

When we come to closure with our past, we can begin to live with it, not in it, and instead embrace our life in the present and create our future.

We are well aware that today is the year 2024 and the past is over, but our body and psyche often tell a different story when we are constantly suffering and have a hard time to find joy in life.

Our problems just seem to keep repeating themselves. This is because we are unconsciously still living in the past and seeing and experiencing our present world and people through this filter. We can’t help it but too often feel in danger, stressed, insecure, defensive and overwhelmed.

Trauma integration with IoPT and Reiki can help you process conscious and unconscious early life experiences and enable you to live more in the present, feel safe in your own body and in control again.

From my heart to yours 💞
Anja

The quality of our sleep affects our physical, mental and emotional health.

Especially in our stressful modern lifestyle the ability of our body and brain to slow down and have a deep rest is essential for good health.

Studies show that if we are sleep deprived it affects our emotional and behavioural reactions, capacities to solve problems and is even linked to depression and anxiety.

Reiki is a natural hands on energy healing technique that allows your body to deeply rest and restore during the session and promotes a good and restful sleep.

Especially my mom clients express their gratitude often about how well and deep they and their baby could sleep after Reiki. Our sleep quality really makes all the difference in how present, productive and happy we can experience our day.

How is your sleep at the moment?

From my heart to yours 💕
Anja

From the beginning of our life to give our love and receive love back as a pathway of connection gives purpose to our life. If there is any incoherence and blockage in this flow of love, we feel disconnected.

Over the years from early childhood to adulthood our conscious and unconscious life experiences in close relationships shape our idea of what love is.

We are all looking for a loving relationship but for a couple it can become difficult for example when they have two different ideas about what love is, how their partner has to be in order for them to feel loved, when they avoid their true feelings, unconsciously project someone else on one another and see them as being responsible for their wellbeing.

The sad reality of many relationships is one of disconnection, emotional pain, insecurity, dependency, mistrust, frustration and feelings of guilt, fear, anger and shame.

There is an unconscious reason for why two people have found each other and struggle with love the way they do.

All our thoughts, feelings and behaviours have a story.

Instead of judging ourselves how we respond in our relationship we could begin to discover what experiences, beliefs and feelings are unconsciously informing the way how we show up in and experience close relationship.

When we get clearer about why we think, react and feel the way we do, we can come back to reality and no longer see others through the filter of our past life experiences.

When we reconnect with ourselves and don't deny or suppress any of our feelings and needs anymore we can live true to ourselves, set healthy boundaries, and know who we are. We no longer need to please our partner in order to feel good about ourself, safe, loved and maybe even in order to preserve harmony that doesn't exist anyways.

From a place of clarity, truth and self connection we can end the fight for love and become an active part in creating a healthy, peaceful, authentic, loving and safe relationship that is not blurred by past hurts anymore.

Our self love is our biggest support on that journey.

What is love for you? Share with me in the comments or message.

From my heart to yours 💕
Anja

Little innocent child
with your big smile and tender heart
looking for eyes to meet you in your world
full of light and joy; from the very start

But their eyes look sad
retreating to a place far away from you

Little innocent child
with your big smile and tender heart
you can feel their sorrow that keeps you apart

Your love is so big, your soul is so pure
you want them to be happy
you are determined to find the cure

You hope for some help but no one to see
you carry the burden and hope that's the key

Little innocent child
it's not your fault
it's not on you to heal
love and joy is all you should feel

Keep on praying with your sweet little hands
for their hearts and eyes to see
that asking for help can lift their burden
and from all generations to be

~ Anja Jaskolski ~

Children are very sensitive to how their parents are (really) doing. If they are sad or happy, anxious, angry, present and emotionally available or withdrawn.

Children need and love their parents so much; they will tirelessly try to do anything to rescue them from their pain and make them happy. But it is a mission impossible for a child and this can leave marks in the development of their healthy self-connection, confidence and feeling of worthiness.

Adults can receive help from adults to process trauma and emotional wounds. Reaching out for help is a strength and not a weakness. It is empowering and reliefs our children.

Can you relate? Were your mom and dad happy or emotionally burdened? How was that for you? Share with me in the comments.

From my heart to yours 💕
Anja

Is it difficult for you to trust yourself and others?

You would like to open your heart, but it just doesn’t work. You constantly avoid contact and withdraw into yourself without wanting to. You feel lonely and isolated but at least it’s better than exposing yourself to the risk of being hurt again.

Our basic trust can be deeply shaken by early hurts with our attachment figures. As children, our love is innocent and unconditional. We are so needy and that is what makes us so vulnerable. When our neediness is ignored, shamed, used, hurt or even betrayed, our inner and outer world collapses like a building.

As a child, we do not yet have the opportunity to process and heal this experience. All we have left is to blame ourselves and to suppress and forget the memory and feelings of it.

But our body does not forget anything. Unconsciously, our hurts remain and are the reason why we as adults find it so difficult to be close to others.

Today we can slowly, stone by stone, rebuild a new home in our heart, warmly invite others and learn to trust love again.

This is what I wish for you. If you want me to support you in this, feel free to message me.

From my heart to yours 💕
Anja

For more than 20 years, there have been numerous studies that alarmingly show the psychological and physical consequences of violence against children.

The ACE's (Adverse Childhood Experience) research from the United States captures forms of violence such as sexual, physical and emotional abuse, neglect, but also separation of parents, witnessing domestic violence, growing up with mentally ill or addicted family members and the imprisonment of family members.

The more stressful experiences a child makes, the more significant and severe the negative effects, such as mental illness, alcohol abuse, drug use, and violence against themselves or others.

A comprehensive international study by Unicef in 2014 showed that in countries particularly affected by severe conflicts, war, crime and civil unrest, rates of violence against children are very high.

Peace can begin,
💕when every child is wanted, loved and protected from the beginning.
💕when every child is seen, heard and held in his or her needs.
💕when every child has a warm, safe and non-violent home.

From my heart to yours 💞
Anja

With warm thanks to Sven Fuchs and his dedication to present this important data about the link between childhood origins and political violence and extremism.

Are you living from a place of love or fear? Which of the two dominates in you?

The love for ourself that we have within us is the counterpart to fear and terror.

For most of us our first early experiences with fear were moments when we felt all alone and helpless. Outside events of unrest and crisis can trigger us into those early times of distress and disconnection.

When we are able to switch to our love we experience connection, our basic human need, that pulls us out of our isolation and can soothe our fear. We are not alone anymore. We are held and protected in love. Our self love becomes our self-support.

We need to find a way for our self love to grow in order to find a safe place within.

Love is safety. Safety is Peace!

From my heart to yours 💕
Anja