Mosaic Counselling

Jacqueline, a highly sought-after therapist with a decade of experience specializing in betrayal trauma, is now accepting new clients and offers a complimentary 20 minute consultation!

Jacqueline has successfully guided numerous patients through their betrayal trauma recovery and has worked in various mental health settings including; ongoing private practice, outpatient treatment centres, community agencies, walk-in counselling services, and post secondary educational communities.

If you’re interested in booking a free consultation or have any questions, please feel free to contact us at [email protected].

When it comes to our well-being, self-care can often be overlooked. Here are some different practices to nourish your mind, body, and soul and maintain your mental health 🌱

Kate brings over a decade of experience to Mosaic Counselling! Her approach is evidence based and her work is informed by extensive working knowledge of attachment theory and interpersonal neurobiology.

If you’re considering therapy and are interested in booking a free initial 20 minute consultation with Kate, please feel free to reach us at [email protected] or click on the link that’s provided on our bio.

Learn more about Kate’s background and experience over here ➡️ https://counsellingmosaic.ca/about-me-kate-quinn/

Taking the first step into therapy can feel intimidating, and the process of finding the ideal therapist is often a complex task.

Kate is deeply committed to creating a therapeutic space that is comfortable, emotionally safe, and respectful, fostering a collaborative and compassionate relationship.

With over a decade of experience in Toronto's mental health field, her work spans various organizations and is grounded in evidence-based practices. Drawing from therapeutic modalities like narrative therapy, CBT, EMDR, and mindfulness-based self-compassion.

Kate is currently accepting new clients. Please see the link in the bio to schedule a free 20 minute phone consultation with her.

Registration is now open! Building Foundations - 6 Week Support Group.

From November 1st to December 6th. This group will take place online on Wednesdays from 6:00pm to 7:30pm.

If you’re interested, please feel free to email us at [email protected].

If you would like the opportunity to join the popular Building Foundations 6 Week Support Group registration is now open for our November 1-December 6 Group

Taking place online
Wednesdays 6:00-7:30pm

If you are interested please email: [email protected]

Registration is open and spots are still available for the popular Building Foundations 6 Week Support Group

Running: September 13-October 18

Themes include: creating safety, identifying rights, exploring communication, self compassion and processing loss

If interested email: [email protected] for more information or to register

The problem is the problem.
The person is not the problem.

When we externalize the problem that we are experiencing it can help reduce the shame, self-blame, and distress, while giving more perspective and agency.

For example, if we were to understand that one was to experience depression, rather than being a “depressed person” it can provide much needed space in our self- identity.

When we have this space, we can have more conversations regarding the range of possibilities available.

Trauma informed care is a helpful concept that continues to be developed and standardized in many organizations.

However trauma informed care can be different than trauma therapy.

Characterized by different modalities,trainings and supervisions, trauma therapy serves as a way to process traumatic experiences.

We can practice being an observer all the time.

In fact, the more we practice, the stronger this skill can become. This allows us to practice responding rather than reacting.

Being an observer to our own life means engaging in non-judgmental awareness of the world around us. Here are some invitations to practice awareness.

• You may want to practice this by slowing down your movements while you are making and drinking your coffee. Notice the smells, textures, and warmth of your drink.

• See if you can slow down your walking pace by half, what happens? What thoughts do you notice? What happens in your body when you slow down?

• When washing the dishes, see if you can become aware of the temperature of the water, the temporal nature of the dirty dish, and smell of the dish soap.

If EMDR therapy is a service that interests you, check out the link in our bio!

Mediation, mindfulness skills, and mindful movement, can help strength our ability to be mindful.

The goal of mindfulness practice is to reduce suffering, to increase our ability to respond (rather than react) and to experience the connection to ourselves and others.

Mindfulness has seen a big surge in different therapeutic modalities including DBT, CBT, EMDR, IFS, and others.

Wherever you are in your mindfulness practice know that you can begin again, right now, in this moment.
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Thoughts can trigger feelings of fear, overwhelm and distress. By using sensory awareness, we can begin to tune into the present moment.

Sensory awareness can even be used as a distress tolerance skill, and or a mindfulness skill!

Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT) is a modality that focuses on distress tolerance, interpersonal relationships, mindfulness, and emotional regulation.

Connecting with others through deep listening, vulnerability, and open heartedness (i.e. putting aside the need to be “right”) can enrich a sense of compassion and loving-kindness.

Spaces where this can happen include individual therapy, group therapy, 12 step groups, and other therapeutic settings. However, we can also use these principles when engaging with friends, partners and family.

Sit with it!

Taking time to reflect on the pleasant moments in our day can help us integrate the experience.
Dr. Rick Hanson explains that our brains are hardwired to remember negative or dangerous experiences, holding onto them like Velcro. As a result our brains tend to forget the positive experiences, slipping from our mind like Teflon.

Often it is easy to recall moments when we felt shame, rejection, disappointment (feeding into negative self-talk and even distorted thinking).

By spending time reflecting on feelings of connection, self-growth, compassion, and success we can help keep this data accessible in our brains and nervous systems for a more balanced outlook.

Putting my hands on my heart and saying “Good morning” to my body… it may sound strange, but it’s transformed how I experience my day.

For a long time I only paid attention to the outside of my body. Trying to be obedient to the social norms of what a body “should” look like. Numbing out to our bodies, and living strictly from the neck up is how many have been coached to live. Trying to repair the mind body connection into a type of friendship, rather than an adversarial or neglectful one is radical!

Working with people in therapy it has become clear that the body is so much more than an outer shell. Bodies hold stories, memories, data, and even history that can help us understand what we are feeling, and what we may need.

Engaging in practices like compassionate body scans, and reading books like The Wisdom of Your Body and The Body Keeps the Score can be a great start to developing a friendship with our bodies and open us up to a deeper sense of aliveness. 📸 Exercise taken from The Wisdom of the Body by Hillary McBride, PhD

Putting my hands on my heart and saying “Good morning” to my body… it may sound strange, but it’s transformed how I experience my day.

For a long time I only paid attention to the outside of my body. Trying to be obedient to the social norms of what a body “should” look like. Numbing out to our bodies, and living strictly from the neck up is how many have been coached to live. Trying to repair the mind body connection into a type of friendship, rather than an adversarial or neglectful one is radical!

Working with people in therapy it has become clear that the body is so much more than an outer shell. Bodies hold stories, memories, data, and even history that can help us understand what we are feeling, and what we may need.

Engaging in practices like compassionate body scans, and reading books like The Wisdom of Your Body and The Body Keeps the Score can be a great start to developing a friendship with our bodies and open us up to a deeper sense of aliveness. 📸 Exercise taken from The Wisdom of the Body by Hillary McBride, PhD

Ruptures happen! Feeling unheard, miscommunication, and not connecting with someone we care about can be a real and painful part of human relationships.

Just as our humanness can create ruptures in relationships, we can also move towards repair. Repair means being “good enough” i.e. not perfect at being able to notice when there is a rupture, and authentically and empathetically attending to it.

Repair requires emotional awareness of your own state, as well as vulnerability to communicate with empathy towards the other person. Skills such as being able to take accountability, to hold two truths at once, compassion for ourselves and the other person, and to be willing to sit with discomfort are excellent in helping with the repair process.

When an effective and intentional repair happens in a relationship, it can deepen a sense of understanding and closeness!

In therapy we often talk about the difference between a response versus a reaction. Often our past experiences and traumas can put us into a state of reacting when we feel like we may be in danger. Reacting means a stimulus has occurred and we have an external or internal activation. An example of this may be giving your partner the silent treatment when they are late for dinner.

Responding means a stimulus has occurred and we have an opportunity to mindfully pause and engage in a way that we have actively chosen. This might mean, that if your partner is late for dinner, you can check in with the feelings and needs you have, so you can express them in an effective way to your partner.

How do we get to a place where we can pause? We practice. We can practice by engaging in regular meditation. We can also practice by pausing when we are in line at the grocery store, when we are trying to decide what we want to have for dinner, and whenever we can. And we can even practice by checking in with our bodies, and non-judgmentally paying attention to any sensations that we may experience. By practicing the pause, it makes it a little more accessible to use it in times where we may be triggered and can allow us to respond rather than react.

The best 🎁 gift 🎁 you give yourself this season could be a fresh start. 🌱

📆 Registration is now open for our popular Building Foundations support group. Six weeks creating safety, identifying rights, exploring communication patterns, self-compassion, and processing loss.

All sessions held on Zoom. Minimum 3 participants, maximum 6. $475

If you're interested in attending, please contact our office at [email protected] or reach out to us by private message.

-compassion

Boundaries can be really difficult to create and implement. Often people can feel stuck in understanding what it is they exactly need.

One of the first steps you may want to take when building a boundary is to pause, and identify what is happening and what you are feeling. For instance, if you notice your shoulders rise, your stomach do flip flops, and a general uneasiness when you attend a meeting at work you may want to take note of this. Try to objectively ask, what is happening? Who are you with? What is being said? What are you thinking? What are you feeling? Does this feel familiar? Asking these questions may help you to identify your need(s). For instance maybe you need to eat something before you attend your meeting, perhaps you are needing to resolve an interpersonal conflict, or needing more clarity regarding your role in the meeting.

Understanding what you may need can be powerful and can help you build your boundaries. Sometimes what we need is external and we have to make a request to someone else. Sometimes what we need is internal and we have to make changes for and within ourselves. And sometimes we need to accept that we cannot change the circumstances. Regardless, having awareness of our needs is crucial in building boundaries.

What now?!

I felt annoyed and inconvenienced seeing yet another message alert pop up on my personal cell phone. It was in that moment I realized that I needed to take a breath, and check-in with myself.

Feeling resentment over seemingly smaller things is a great indicator that I’ve likely over exerted myself and that I need to check in with my boundaries. Boundaries can act as a border that divides what is okay and what is not okay. Boundaries can change and adapt as our lives change. That is why it is important to continually check in with ourselves regarding how we are feeling, what we need, what is working, and what may need adjustment.

You can check in with yourself by observing your thoughts, and engaging in body scans. Boundaries allow us to say “no” to certain things so we can say “yes” to others. Boundaries can allow us to be more authentic, present, and capable in our relationships, in our work, and in our day to day lives.

One way we may want to strengthen our window of tolerance is to build more moments of “awe”. Listening to live music, looking at art work, singing in a choir, watching your child learn a new skill, can lead to that feeling of connectedness. Awe allows us to practice being more curious and present. Physically, awe experiences have been found to predict lower levels of inflammatory responses and daily, small moments of awe predict well-being in the future (Deb Dana, 2020).

Our bodies are incredible at taking in information and processing that information to understand if we are safe or not.

It’s almost like our nervous systems are a thermostat that is constantly regulating the emotional temperature in the room. If we get information telling us that we should stress (i.e. a full inbox, not being able to sleep at night, etc.) our body can go into a protective state of fight/flight such as being anxious or irritable. If we get information that feels overwhelming our bodies can go into a freeze state which can make us feel stuck, zapped of energy, and shut down. There can certainly be a great deal of personal stressors and societal messages of danger. Particularly in a culture that promotes white supremacy, sexism, and other destructive and violent messages.

All information is sorted through our bodies and our body’s responses can be seen as a way of protecting us. We do not need to demonize these responses, rather we can compassionately understand them.

Our nervous system also has a sort of middle state, a window of tolerance. This middle state can allows us to think clearly, proceed mindfully, and self sooth effectively. We can actually build our window of tolerance by cultivating care, compassion, and regulation for ourselves. Some ways that we can build our window of tolerance include mindfulness and meditation, slow deep breathing, and challenging distorted beliefs. In which ways can you grow your window of tolerance?

💯 What is perfectionism doing for you? 💯

It’s very common for people to think that perfectionism is another word for excellence. However, there’s a big difference.

While pursuing excellence there is room for personal growth and healthy striving.

Perfectionism on the other hand can be the painfully ridged expectation that anything that falls short of perfect is intolerable. Many people who experience perfectionism find it difficult to start a task, take risks, have a hard time relaxing, and often suffer from negative self-talk.

Just like so many of our strategies though, perfectionism often serves a purpose. By engaging in perfectionism people often are able to achieve and be highly goal oriented. It’s not the intention to totally exile any part of ourselves, including perfectionism. You may be surprised by the answer when asking the perfectionism part what it is trying to do for you.

How we express our anger matters. Anger is a signal, one that lets us know that we’ve been hurt, our rights are being violated, that our needs aren’t being addressed, or that something is wrong.

Often, we’re told that being angry is a “bad thing”. Most people are not taught how to effectively express anger. Sometimes our anger goes inward (blaming ourselves) causing more negative self-talk and impacting our mood and way of thinking. Other times our anger can go outwards, making us short or irritable with other people.

Being able to take time and inquire what we are angry about, and what other emotions may be associated with our anger allows for processing and sets us up to better express our needs, create safety, and make requests.

Just some of the reasons why this book is important! ⤵️.
📚 This book can help shed a light on why you may find it difficult to slow down, identify what you’re feeling, and prioritize your own care..
📚12 types of parental styles/ characteristics are identified including: The Narcissistic Parent, The Authoritarian Parent, The Permissive Parent, The Depressed Parent, The Addicted Parent, and more..
📚 The patterns and impacts of these types of parents are described, which can be very validating if you have experienced this type of parenting..
📚 Although you may have experienced an “empty tank,” Jonice Webb provides the framework and permission needed to gain a better sense of self (including naming and feeling emotions), emphasizing how to take care of yourself, and guidance to help you break out of legacy of empty tank parenting with your own children ..
📚 What books have resonated with you lately?.
➡️ Head on over to Dr. Jonice Webb's page to connect with more of her resources and tools.

When feeling stuck or even reactive, it can be helpful to compassionately ask what needs are not being met? A gentle investigation can help shed light on fear, safety seeking, or a desire for connection. For example, next time you find yourself quick to react, you can get kind and curious with yourself. Ask, what needs are not being met? Am I feeling unsupported, alone, afraid, tired? Being aware of what our needs are, and how we may be ineffectively reacting to them allows us to acknowledge our humanness and provides opportunity to nurture our needs and respond more effectively.