Flip Side of the Bramble

All the attention on the Johnny Depp/Amber Heard trial is highlighting the problematic presence some particularly evil women. I know exactly how someone can lie, twist the truth, use half truths, take incidents out of context, use, abuse, and act to ruin someone else's life without regard.

The worst part is no-one will hear the truth. What good is a truth that no-one will listen to?

I woke up one day to discover that I had been reported to the Victoria Police by my at the time recent ex Jenn Aird and falsely accused of breaking into her suite, stalking her, and harassment.

Since I didn't commit any of these crimes I wasn't worried. I figured I could go talk to VICPD and have a chat where they would see that I was honest, forthright and innocent of the accusations.

Since I didn't commit the alleged crimes there was not one shred of evidence that I had done anything. Everything was based on jenns lies.

I wasn't even angry, at first I tried to clear up the matter with her and asked how she could even think I would ever commit the crimes against her that she claimed. I had proof that I didn't commit the alleged crimes. My completely normal rational response to communicate was labeled harassment and I was warned sternly by police that I would be charged If my actions continued.

Now, The day before all this occurred her and I were in contact daily many times. We interacted constantly. I didn't have a clue that everything was so seriously opposite all of a sudden. I was very confused and incredulous that Jenn would use such a vicious lie and take such drastically serious action.

The day before this kerfuffle began where she leveled false charges against me I had uncovered Jenns deceit in a series of untruths which forced me to re-evaluate the character that she seems to portray.

I knew that Jenn was mad at being caught lying but I was completely blindsided the lies and the brutal allegations in an attempt to ruin me so that no one would find out the truth I had finally uncovered.

Now, two weeks after the false accusations I had resumed contact with Jennifer things were intense. Jenn and I finally agreed to meet to talk things over and come to an understanding.

Jenn met me at sax point and we had a picnic on the rooftop deck of my minivan. (This meeting occurred 2 weeks after she had made accusations against me to the police) We ate, talked things over and seemed to have come to an understanding where she accepted that I never broke into her house. She then gifted me a book,

It was to help my with a therapy I was set begin.

Fast forward to a month later where things between Jenn and I had deteriorated and she had reverted back to her falsified stance that I was some kind of lurking menace.

I was realizing at this point that Jenn was actually trying to go through with ruining me with the allegations and was trying to decide what to do about it. I wrote up a letter and sat on it for a month as I didn't want to do anything rash but was getting frustrated by the way the police, friends, coworkers, and family all wouldn't even hear the truth.

I was reading the book that she had given me as a gift a month prior when we had the rooftop picnic on my van. I was just halfway through the book when something fell out of it
It was a lazily half-colored snail postcard from Jenn.

I flipped the postcard over and Jenn had written,

"Who will love my slug tracks when you're gone?
xo xo xo xo xo xo xo
(Wait...that's a snail...)

The postcard note refers to an inside joke we had during our time together and glancing at it you would think its sweet. Except I realized….

If Jenn was so scared of me as she alleges a stalker/harasser/burglar,

Why would she give me a gift?

And why hide a note about love inside of it?

What kind of person would do this?

To me it meant she was intentionally fu***ng
With my head and had been the whole time we were entangled.

It meant I needed to warn the people I cared for and the people around me of the truth about Jenn.

So I wrote and posted a warning letter about Jenn containing the truth as I understood it. I knew it could be misunderstood but I didn't want Jenn to ruin someone else's life with lies like she did to me. So I told myself that if even one person gets my warning, it would be worthwhile.

My life is a disaster being a homeless addict. I'm broken with the BPD emotions of a toddler. So I didn't care what it looked like on me.

I did care about Jennifers lies.

This page was never meant to be about revenge or airing dirty laundry.

All I wanted was a place for the truth without being accused legally by my response to lies and brutal false allegations.

If you care to know I have opened myself up including the good and the bad as I have no shame regarding my actions in this scenario.

I have much more info and evidence after being harassed and stalked for a year because of this bu****it. However, I don't wish to keep being stuck mired in this mess.

I'm going to try to move on but I will leave this page up for anyone who cares about what happened to read and make up your own damn minds about me and my conduct.

I will try to say Goodbye to all that and move forward

Vinny

https://youtu.be/lxV1cX9owKE

To:

Jenn Aird

08/29/2020 1:50 PM

you say we could be friends yet you accuse me of something like this..........no way would i be friends with you after you accuse me of this s**t

08/29/2020 1:51 PM

are actually being vindictive and making this s**t up because i called you spiteful?

Jenn Aird 08/29/2020 1:51 PM

Hey, can you just let me know that you understand that I don't want you to come to my house or contact me? That's all I need to know

08/29/2020 1:52 PM

i was done with you last night.........i dont want a thing to do with you anymore.

Jenn Aird 08/29/2020 1:53 PM

You'll never come to my house or contact me again. All good?

08/29/2020 1:53 PM

f**k off

Jenn Aird 08/29/2020 1:53 PM

All good, Vinny?

08/29/2020 1:54 PM

jennifer im going to ask to you not contact me again is that clear

Jenn Aird 08/29/2020 1:54 PM

If you can't manage to get the words out to me via text that's a problem. You need to tell me that you're not ever going to come to my house, email, text or otherwise contact me. I need you to confirm that you won't.

08/29/2020 1:55 PM

if you continue to text me even thought i have requested you not to i will get a restraining order so you dont harrass me

Jenn Aird 08/29/2020 1:56 PM

I'm not fu***ng playing games with you, Vinny. If you can't respond to my request then I will take next steps. It's pretty fu***ng easy man.

08/29/2020 1:58 PM

take your steps .....i have proof.....you have none because i never did anything that you are implying......f**k you

Jenn Aird 08/29/2020 1:58 PM

Okay. As you wish.

08/29/2020 2:04 PM

wow...wtf.....you are soooooooo wrong on this one

Jenn Aird 08/29/2020 2:05 PM

That actually doesn't matter. That you can't agree to leave me alone is worrying. And like I said, I'm not playing games. You just have to say okay. And if you are innocent that would be a pretty easy thing to do.

08/29/2020 2:06 PM

jennifer i ha ve agreed to not be in contact many times now and 1 or 2 days later you contact me......its a weird game for you im not playing along

Jenn Aird 08/29/2020 2:07 PM

You're choice Vinny.

08/29/2020 2:07 PM

this makes you look unbalanced

08/29/2020 2:45 PM

please let me know which officer you speak with so i can speak with him or her and give them my proof

08/29/2020 3:08 PM

also i need you to confirm that you will not contact me in any way again

Jenn Aird 08/29/2020 5:24 PM

Not a problem. I won't be contacting you.

08/29/2020 5:24 PM

im gonna swend this klast message and then im done...........i felt bad about my words that i sent you last night and put together a package of tings i knew you liked (olives, bacon, cheeses, rose, sea cider gin and a book i had gotten for you called the time travelers wife.......i was going to text you and give uit to you and leave you in peace........and then i woke up to your twisted and utterly false accusations towards me.........how stupid am i? i feel pretty stupid to have spent so much thought and effort and given my heart to you

08/29/2020 5:24 PM

i am done with this and done with you

08/29/2020 5:25 PM

i dont want or need you thinking and accusing me of baseless bu****it

08/29/2020 5:27 PM

i have videocvzamera proof of where i was all night.........you have nothing but your own paranoia and somehow you try to paint me as a creep and a bully

08/29/2020 5:30 PM

you beg me to be a friend and then hurl serious and libelous accusation and threaten me with the police........something is wrong in your head

08/29/2020 5:31 PM

im going to sit and eat and drink my gifts for you and burn your memory.......

08/29/2020 5:31 PM

goodbye to all that

08/29/2020 6:04 PM

if you have anything to say to me ill be aty the park for 30 mins and im not going to reaspond to any communication after

Just a stalker in a wheelchair parked across the street in the wee hours of the morning in September

Jen 8/20_2020
To me

An apology and a response to why I was so furious.

What I needed was for you to be gentle the other evening and you weren’t. Is it your fault? No. I should have asked more clearly for what I needed. I thought you would be able to put together that it was late, I was ill and that I had asked you to stop arguing, but I obviously wasn’t clear enough and I certainly didn’t ask you explicitly for what I needed. It wasn’t fair that I became so angry, despite me feeling, at the time, like I had reason to be.

I can see now that putting on the interview seemed like an invitation to an argument. I made a mistake in doing that. I didn’t want to get into a long argument then but I realize now that was unfair and confusing and I apologize.

In retrospect I think we also should have set up some rules for engagement around a subject as contentious as this. I asked you to stop talking about Jordan Peterson, not because I don’t want to hear your opinion, but because the majority of our past conversations about big topics have escalated quickly. We are both argumentative and intense. And you appear to get triggered/emotional sometimes very easily. When we spoke about racism I had to ask you to leave my house for this very reason. You appeared on the edge of being beyond control of your emotions and it was scary. And, so, I have realized that having these kinds of convos comes with a level of trepidation for me. How angry will you get?

I also have realized also that much of my anger came from an unconscious resentment. I had become resentful because I have felt like I had to maintain a greater level of emotional maturity than you to try to protect me and yourself from triggers. You never asked me to do so but I felt responsible and I chose to take on that responsibility. My choice. After a year and a half together I blew up. I felt angry that you couldn’t have the same level of awareness for me, I threw my patience out the window and I communicated reactively and that degenerated into me saying some mean s**t. I am very sorry to you that I acted this way. My resentment was hidden from me yet it was my responsibility, not yours. I took out my anger -- for a choice that I made -- on you. I am sorry that I did that.

Some rules for engagement:

1. Stop when the other person says stop, like a safe word

2. Only talk about intense s**t at certain times of the day

3. Use a talking stick

4. Have a clear intention for the outcome such as: answer a specific question, explore the opposing perspective, dissect parts of an interview, etc.

Maybe rules of engagement like these would help to keep conversations with the potential for heated reactions functional and productive instead of going off rails.

I think we trigger each other. I trigger your abandonment issue: I leave and come back and leave and come back over and over. It’s familiar to you and perhaps you think that through this relationship you could heal your feelings around that. You trigger my expectation for emotional escalation and threats of violence. And I think that if I do the right thing it will heal you and you will truly love me. Neither of these things will ever happen because we can’t change people. It’s a trick we’re playing on ourselves. At least that’s how I feel. Another trick is that the triggers and our reactions to them are addictive because they affect neurochemicals. It’s like getting high but kind of super fu***ng sucks.

I made a very hurtful comment when we were fighting not too long ago that something must be wrong with me to have dated you for a year. I’m so sorry I said that. I regret saying it. We’ve both had experiences that impact the way we relate to other people. I don’t think you’re more f**ked up than me, but I do think what you’ve experienced is 10,000 times more intense and, therefore, a heavier burden for you.

You can draw whatever conclusions you want to make about me… the truth is that what will give you peace is taking responsibility for yourself. Even though I discarded you, you allowed me to come back. And, same goes for me… even though you abused me with your words, I allowed you to come back. Neither of us should have accepted that from each other. It’s terrible behaviour… terrible of me and terrible of you.

I’ll be forever sorry that I have hurt you. It was never what I hoped to do and I very much f**ked up. I hope you can find space in your heart for forgiveness of my mistakes and hurting you.

Wishing you all the very best.

--
"Though I am silent there is singing around me."
-- Wendell Berry



9/18/2020
To Jen

this is how you camoflauge.......hiding behind empty words that people mistaknly believe were sent with the meanings that they know..
your so sorry for trying to love me and fu***ng it up by trying to stronger than me to help me?that sure makes you look noble
you remind me so graciously that i am terrible because
you hoped that i would maybe truly love you?
thats quite a line......is that why you imagined you were a part of a quest to end the tyranny of men and then argued against me endlessly accusing me of ruining your health as a result ......just crossing ur fingers hoping that would do the trick and i would feel not just any love but something right out of the fairy tales TRUE LOVE
is that why you play hot and cold endlessly with me? you love me so much you'll flip and act like you don't so i will respond with true love?
or maybe you are trying to trigger me into emotional escalation that is delicious to you and which have imprinted onto because any feeling is better than the emptiness in you..........an escalation of emotion which i will regret and will try after to desperately gain your approval and presence which i mistake as a sign of your love but is actually just you feediing off my desperation and your control...... you also need someone to free] you from the boredom of your own life and delicious drama is your pasttime......that true love line i bet you use every time..........its perfect as it implies your love to desperate people grasping for anything resembling love who interpret that as a need for just a litlle more af whatever they can do or give so you can finally recognize their feelings and reward them with your love......but it doesnt say or mean that you feel love and in fact you never say that you love or loved me in that whole pile of words. masterful [email protected] done......did you pick that one up in a book you read?
your attack startegy using the r**e line bounced so you dusted off a surfire winner...........your are so sorry for trying to be stronger so that I wont hurt you anymore...... if ony i would truely love you...... how did you learn that pretending to be sorry is way better than getting angry and refusing to agknowledge s (i finally got to see you degenerate into the baser angry refusing attacker) ........sorry is relatively sophisticated bu****it and sadly most people want to believe the apology is genuine and readily accept it allowing you to reel them back into you game
2.4.1 your pology also happens to be a nice bit of words to show the few anaware people you call friends that you tolerate occasionally so that you dont seem so suspiciously alone.......the words makes you seem like you care and that you are gracious and noble and it was a solid effort but i just could'nt truely love you.........good publicity for damn sure .......

the very last line is cut and pasted for sure......you do not talk like that......but hallelujah Hope & Space in my heart for forgiveness...........almost makes me want to be a better person and letting you back in could allow me to transcend my pain.......AMAZING!! clap clap clap....

this pinocchio has got no strings and you have no cricket

i loved you and you put a plasctic figure of love on a hook catching me for your tank.

how long do your catches last i wonder...................

do they figure it out too or just get frustrated eventually and reach their limits

For me it went:

Ex Narc trys to dump her wheelbarrow of mucky relationship paranoia and mistrust on me. Nope!! not mine!! I call the bu****it and leave the s**t there for her to stew in. She responds with pseudo silent treatment and passive aggressive outburst texts to stab my core pain regarding my daughter and childhood abuses. I react volcanically as BpD pain rage erupts and words fly slicing her ego, and flimsy facade, highlighting her stupidity and glaring narcissism,

We both retreat.

Wilted and feeling awful for my words I am now suddenly dumped in the first of many discards which shreds my fragile heart with anguish and seperarion anxiety. The emotions take me about a week to settle from. I put my feeling on paper as art.

She media deletes me claiming I am an abuser and blames my words as the reason for the breakup. She is adamant that she can't be with someone like me. And she starts a listing of my devaluation points. She Wants zero contact from me again ever.

2 days later she wants to have dinner but first has to remind me that I'm an abuser and she won't put up with my horrible abuse because her dad was mean and I'm just like her dad. Then directly after s*x she starts a fight about s*xism accussing me of things I never did and words I never said.

I am desperate to be loved and think her abuse is love because it what my childhood consisted of. So I accepted all the guilt and earnestly tried to be better and contrite and not rouse her instantaneous discard. I had zero self worth and didn't have a clue about NPD or their classic manipulations.

After a bakers dozen or so discards and hoovers and silent treatments the hooks of intermittent reinforcement set deep fastening a trauma bond into my heart as continuing rounds of increasingly more intense acussations and manipulations from her resulted in emotional upheavals and reactions from me which ripped into her greasey bu****it like bad butter.

Accusations and lies and toxic crap build up a s**t stew as she tries to destroy me before I unmask her. She spends more time away grooming new victims. She knows the unmasking is just about to happen and sadly tells me I won't like her later and that she's a bad person. I think she might have tried to dump me easy in a way. But BPD don't get dumped on easy. EVER!

I HOLD ON DESPERATELY

SHE HURTS ME MALICIOUSLY TO SHAKE ME OFF

Finall I UNMASK HER after 26 straight hours of bu****it from her.

She rages in a park and deletes me on all social media. 2 hours later she Re-adds me on Instagram but after reading my angry queries as to wtf she is doing on my insta if she wants no contact she simply doesn't answer any of my 6 texts over 6 hours. I'm flabbergasted and talking to myself muttering emotional drool as I turn catch her hiding behind a tree with the Instagram app open on the phone in her hand watching my incredulity and frustration at her nonsense and silence from across the park. I storm over and ask her wtf she is doing and experience her Narc rage Attack again. Later she reframes the event in her police statements accussing me of accosting her in the park as she looked back one last time at the sad lost relationship. Fu***ng bu****it.

The next day I awake to her lying to police about me and on and on and she still fu***ng lies. She has No dignity and No truth. A week later she begs me to still be her friend as she begin sending her army of gangstalkers to incessantly hound me. She is a broken shard of sharp glass.

I cursed her to an endless search for love which she will never find. I have never before or after cursed a person in such a manner

Then as I learned about NPD, I found out she's already cursed in such a manner.

How about them apples?