The Good Therapy Works

Therapy room makeover - lovely fresh modern space for me and my clients - even a long update pic of me!!!

Phrases every boy needs to hear growing up….

What matters is that we keep going.

I know this, I live this.

I am no different to you 🤍

…and if you need someone to hold your hand as you do it, I’m here 🖐🏻

Clients of mine know I love to “flip the script!”

Apologies - the contact page on my website is not currently working and the messages are not being delivered, please FB message or email directly while I sort it out - sorry to those who have been trying to make contact.

An elderly Chinese woman had two large pots, each hung on the ends of a pole which she carried across her neck. One of the pots had a crack in it while the other pot was perfect and always delivered a full portion of water.

At the end of the long walks from the stream to the house, the cracked pot arrived only half full. For a full two years this went on daily, with the woman bringing home only one and a half pots of water..

Of course, the perfect pot was proud of its accomplishments. But the poor cracked pot was ashamed of its own imperfection, and miserable that it could only do half of what it had been made to do.

After two years of what it perceived to be bitter failure, it spoke to the woman one day by the stream.

'I am ashamed of myself, because this crack in my side causes water to leak out all the way back to your house.

The old woman smiled, 'Did you notice that there are flowers on your side of the path, but not on the other pot's side?'

'That's because I have always known about your flaw, so I planted flower seeds on your side of the path, and every day while we walk back, you water them.'

For two years I have been able to pick these beautiful flowers to decorate the table.

Without you being just the way you are, there would not be this beauty to grace the house.'

Each of us has our own unique flaw. But it's the cracks and flaws we each have that make our lives together so very interesting and rewarding.

You've just got to take each person for what they are and look for the good in them.

SO, to all of my cracked pot friends and clients, have a great day and remember to smell the flowers on your side of the path.

Not posted anything for a while (sorry!) but found this article which resonated and may be of interest https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2022/apr/30/what-ive-learned-from-10-years-of-therapy-and-why-its-time-to-stop?CMP=Share_iOSApp_Other

What I’ve learned from 10 years of therapy - and why it’s time to stop Therapy was like finding a key for a door that had been locked my whole life. Here are the nine things it’s taught me

https://mailchi.mp/psychologytools.com/ukraine?e=d5b4fe2c32

Free Ukrainian Translations of Trauma Resources If you choose to help financially, a good way to do this is to make a donation to any of the following established organizations:

My partner died. Then my brother. Here’s what not to say to someone who is grieving In an effort to help – and to protect themselves – people try to shrink the loss with empty platitudes. But that can make grief even more painful

Written by John Roedel

GOD, THIS IS BEAUTIFUL! TAKE THE TIME TO READ IT ❤️
As someone who writes often, I naturally appreciate epic writing when I see it. This morning, I came across this written piece of art and it moved me deeply, so I had to share it with all of you! Not only are these words true theatre, they also act as sound advice ❤️

my brain and
heart divorced

a decade ago

over who was
to blame about
how big of a mess
I have become

eventually,
they couldn't be
in the same room
with each other

now my head and heart
share custody of me

I stay with my brain
during the week

and my heart
gets me on weekends

they never speak to one another

- instead, they give me
the same note to pass
to each other every week

and their notes they
send to one another always
says the same thing:

"This is all your fault"

on Sundays
my heart complains
about how my
head has let me down
in the past

and on Wednesday
my head lists all
of the times my
heart has screwed
things up for me
in the future

they blame each
other for the
state of my life

there's been a lot
of yelling - and crying

so,

lately, I've been
spending a lot of
time with my gut

who serves as my
unofficial therapist

most nights, I sneak out of the
window in my ribcage

and slide down my spine
and collapse on my
gut's plush leather chair
that's always open for me

~ and I just sit sit sit sit
until the sun comes up

last evening,
my gut asked me
if I was having a hard
time being caught
between my heart
and my head

I nodded

I said I didn't know
if I could live with
either of them anymore

"my heart is always sad about
something that happened yesterday
while my head is always worried
about something that may happen tomorrow,"
I lamented

my gut squeezed my hand

"I just can't live with
my mistakes of the past
or my anxiety about the future,"
I sighed

my gut smiled and said:

"in that case,
you should
go stay with your
lungs for a while,"

I was confused
- the look on my face gave it away

"if you are exhausted about
your heart's obsession with
the fixed past and your mind's focus
on the uncertain future

your lungs are the perfect place for you

there is no yesterday in your lungs
there is no tomorrow there either

there is only now
there is only inhale
there is only exhale
there is only this moment

there is only breath

and in that breath
you can rest while your
heart and head work
their relationship out."

this morning,
while my brain
was busy reading
tea leaves

and while my
heart was staring
at old photographs

I packed a little
bag and walked
to the door of
my lungs

before I could even knock
she opened the door
with a smile and as
a gust of air embraced me
she said

"what took you so long?"

~ John Roedel (johnroedel.com)

https://www.carolynspring.com/blog/trauma-and-the-bears?utm_source=sendinblue&utm_campaign=20102021-trauma-and-the-bears&utm_medium=email&fbclid=IwAR3v7vfIVQiKA3W_qJKcrP2qXXrBru7dczEQOd4NwgHMj-2yp5Q9z2WLvlU

Trauma and the Bears – A Fable | Carolyn Spring Recovery from trauma starts with acknowledging the existence of bears. It requires the involvement of a safe tribe. It necessitates the telling of our story and the healing of our wounds. And it requires action to keep us safe from further bear attacks.

Just rescued this little fella from the therapy room - all clear now! May have made for an interesting therapy session if he’d hopped into the space 🐸

Take Our Free 1 Minute Quiz To Find Out How. What's Your Communication Superpower? Did you know there are 5 mindful communication strategies? Which one is your communication superpower? Knowing your predominant mindful communication strategy will make you surprisingly more effective in working with your clients — and in all your relationship...

“One of the greatest tragedies in life is to lose your own sense of self and accept the version of you that is expected by everyone else.”
K.L. Toth

Catrin Welz Stein

Sorting Through Belongings After a Death | What to do with someone's stuff After someone dies, at some point we have to start thinking about how to deal with their possessions. In this blog post, Adrian, one of our Bereavement Volunteers, offers some advice on how to start the process of dealing with a dead person's belongings.