Dr Tess Browne

For graphic: 'There's more to rest than sleep'

Have you ever had a good night's sleep but still felt tired? 🙋‍♀️

If that sounds familiar, it might be time to explore if the OTHER types of rest is actually what your body needs.

According to Dr Saundra Dalton-Smith there are seven key types of rest, each of which serves a unique purpose in helping us to feel refreshed, renewed and fully restored.

These include:

⋒ Physical Rest
⋒ Mental Rest
⋒ Emotional Rest
⋒ Sensory Rest
⋒ Creative Rest
⋒ Social Rest
⋒ Spiritual Rest

I've written a blog post going into each rest type in more detail called The Seven Types of Rest Every Person Needs. You can find it here👉🏼 www.drtessbrowne.com/journal/the-seven-types-of-rest-every-person-needs ✨

Was your birth experience different to how you hoped or expected it to be?

For most mothers, the answer to this question is yes.

For me, the answer to this question is yes 🙋🏼‍♀️

Birth disappointment is an extremely common postpartum experience, but one which often doesn't get shared due to barriers such as embarrassment, guilt or shame. Such emotions can cause us to stay silent about our birth experience or aspects of our experience, and block the healing process.

As a clinical psychologist specialising in women's health, I have worked with hundreds of women who have shared disappointing birth experiences with me. Having a safe, non-judgemental space to process difficult feelings related to your birth experience is an important step in your postpartum journey. Maybe it is with your partner, a family member or close friend. Maybe it is in your journal. Maybe it is with a qualified health professional, like myself.

Talking or writing about your experiences won't change your experience, but it may change how you think and feel about it.

I've written two articles on birth disappointment on my blog, including one which walks you through 10 Strategies for Healing from Birth Disappointment. Head to this link www.drtessbrowne.com/journal/10-strategies-for-healing-from-birth-disappointment to read more

And if your experience is something you are ready to talk about with a professional, DM me to find out how I could support you ⋒

I've been working in the field of trauma throughout my entire career, and was recently so honoured to be awarded Trauma-Focused CBT Therapist of the Year ✨.

If you've experienced something traumatic, you might recognise some of the symptoms that I've shared here (swipe to read them all 👉🏼).

It's very normal to experience these symptoms in the first few weeks following something traumatic, and usually they lessen naturally over time, as the brain and body make sense of what has happened. However, for some people, these symptoms can linger and may develop into a mental health disorder, such as post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), other anxiety disorders or clinical depression.

If your symptoms persist beyond four weeks, or you, or others, are worried about them, please do reach out for support. There are some extremely effective, evidence-based psychological treatments for trauma, including trauma-focused CBT (a special kind of CBT) and EMDR. With the right support, it is possible to heal the wounds of a traumatic experience and move forward.

Please get in touch if you want to chat or find out more about therapy options for trauma ⋒

❤️ why I LOVE my job ❤️

Receiving lovely client feedback truly brings me so much joy and I feel so blessed when a kind message like this one pops up in my inbox ✨

One of my favourite aspects of therapy is increased self-awareness and integrating that awareness into your everyday life so that you...

⋒ can notice and modify unhelpful thinking and behavioural patterns
⋒ are equipped with a 'toolbox' of strategies to help you create change
⋒ feel empowered, resilient and confident
⋒ are able to move forward with your life and successfully navigate any bumps further along the journey

I love hearing about how my clients are getting on, and how they've been able to apply all the important work that we've done together to enrich their lives going forwards. This is the ultimate why for me and gives me so much motivation and purpose to keep doing the work that I do 😊

I have limited availability left for 1:1 therapy or coaching this year, so if this is something you've been considering, get in touch to book a free intro call here www.drtessbrowne.com/contact

I know I need more rest but how can I get it when I'm so busy?!

In my last post I shared the seven types of rest we need in order to feel our best… but finding the time to squeeze restful practices in isn't easy when there are so many other competing priorities in our lives.

If you can find ways to incorporate rest into your everyday routine, not only are you likely to see long-term benefits to your physical and mental health, but you will likely find that you get time back! This could be in the form of increased productivity, reduced burnout and illness, greater energy or improved cognitive ability.

But how can we make space for rest in our lives? Here are a few ideas that might work for you:

⋒ Start Small - Think about which type of rest you might need to prioritise first and find a simple way to incorporate it into your day.

⋒ Experiment - Your needs, and the practices that will leave you feeling most restored are unique - experiment and embrace what makes you feel best.

⋒ Be Intentional - Pay attention to what you need in the moment; this might not be consistent from one day to the next.

⋒ Commit - Rest isn’t going to happen by chance if you don’t make time for it.

⋒ Set Boundaries - Committing to rest might mean saying no to things every now and then.

⋒ Stay Motivated - Remember WHY prioritising rest is important to you in order to stay grounded, focused and committed to making time for rest.

⋒ Mix and Match - There are many practices that will give you rest and relief in multiple areas at once.

⋒ Remain Flexible - Your needs for rest may change over time. Stay open and curious to adapting and adopting new restful practices as needed.

⋒ Work Together - Share what you have learnt about rest with your friends and family, and invite those close to you to engage in restful practices together.

You can read more about the types of rest we need, how they will benefit you and how you can integrate them into your everyday, in my latest blog post 'The Seven Types of Rest Every Person Needs' ➜ www.drtessbrowne.com/journal/the-seven-types-of-rest-every-person-needs

Have you found any creative ways of incorporating more rest into your life? Let me know in the comments what's worked well or not so well?

✨ Trauma-Focused CBT Specialist of the Year ✨⁠

I won another award! 🤗 I actually received this a while ago but always feel a bit awkward about sharing these things. However, I realised it's important to own our achievements, just as I encourage my clients to do. So here I am... owning it.

Receiving a reward specifically for my trauma work is a real honour. I've been working in the field of trauma throughout my entire career. Starting in forensic psychology, then researching and treating military trauma for many years, before specialising in perinatal trauma. I have been extremely privileged to train and work in two of the UK's leading NHS trauma services alongside incredible colleagues and clients. These experiences have shaped my career and fuelled my passion for supporting survivors of traumatic stress. In addition to Trauma-focused CBT, I also integrate EMDR, Compassion Focused Therapy and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy in my therapeutic work, depending on the specific needs and preferences of my client.

It has been an honor to walk alongside incredibly courageous and resilient individuals as they heal and rebuild their lives following unimaginable traumas and losses. Thank you to each and every one of you who has trusted me with your story. You inspire me every day to continue this important work and strive to be the best therapist I can be 🙏🏼 💞

Happy International Self-Care Day!

Self-care matters because YOU matter.

You matter more than just the occasional bubble bath or odd hour to yourself here and there.

In order to commit to self-care it needs to be all about you.
⋒⁠ What relaxes and nourishes you?
⋒⁠ What fits in with your life?
⋒⁠ What kindness can you extend to yourself on a regular basis?

To help you get (or keep) going on your self-care journey, I’ve written a couple of articles which I know you will find valuable:

- Self-Care Matters Because You Matter, where I dive into the difference between proactive and reactive self-care (you need both!) and, in case you need convincing, outline the key benefits of treating yourself with kindness and care:

https://drtessbrowne.com/journal/self-care-matters-because-you-matter

- Value-Based Self-Care: What it is and Why you need it, where I share a simple but effective three-step strategy for identifying your why. Establishing clarity on this will help to cultivate motivation and a more consistent and committed practice of self-care. Thus, more benefits!

https://drtessbrowne.com/journal/value-based-self-care-what-it-is-and-why-you-need-it

Remember, you are enough, just as you are. And through self-care and self-compassion, you have the power to overcome any obstacle that comes your way ✨

If you're struggling with screen time guilt, know that you're not alone 🫶🏻

As a psychologist, I know that many mothers can experience uncomfortable and conflicting feelings when they hand over a tablet or turn on the TV; relief - to get a much needed break - alongside guilt - for not living up to our (often impossible) ideals. Although uncomfortable, these guilty feelings are natural, and a sign of how much being a present parent means to you. It's important not to allow them to overshadow the bigger picture of your parenting.

In my last post, I explored areas to consider to help you reframe your perspective of screen time use. Now, let's explore some simple strategies for managing your guilt:

⋒ Notice it's Function
What is your guilt communicating to you? Is it helpful and rationale, alerting you that you have acted out of alignment with your values or how you want to show up as a mum? Or is it unhelpful and irrational?

⋒ Challenge Guilty Thoughts
Rather than automatically assume your thoughts represent the truth, be curious about their accuracy. Are there any experiences which show this thought isn’t true all the time? If a friend thought this, what would you tell them?

⋒ Practice Self-Compassion
Be kind to yourself. Parenting is complex, and there is no one-size-fits-all approach. Acknowledge the effort you put into balancing your child’s needs.

⋒ Adopt a Flexible Mindset
Be flexible and adapt to your family’s unique needs. What works today might change tomorrow, and that’s perfectly okay.

⋒ Stay Informed
Keep up with the latest research and recommendations about screen time. This knowledge can help you make informed decisions and feel more confident about your choices.

⋒ Seek Support
Talk to other parents to share experiences. Guilt is one of the most universal motherhood experiences, and knowing you’re not alone can be a powerful way to alleviate it. If you are finding guilt is significantly impacting your mood or mental health, reach out for support from one of our team of psychologists.

You can learn more about the strategies above, as well as some additional ones in my "mum guilt" workbook. Download "The Mum Guilt Manual" for free via this link www.drtessbrowne.com/info ⋒

Thoughts

As a psychologist, I often encounter mothers grappling with guilt over their child’s screen time. In today’s digital age, screens are an integral part of our lives, and balancing their use can be really challenging! It's crucial for your mental wellbeing to address any guilt which shows up in a timely and constructive way, and understand that it can be managed with thoughtful strategies and a compassionate mindset.

Guilt arises when we perceive a discrepancy between our actions and our ideal standards. For many mothers, the ideal involves providing enriching, screen-free experiences for their children. When reality includes handing over a tablet to have a minute to yourself or to get through a busy day, guilt can creep in. It’s important to acknowledge that these feelings are natural and not to allow them overshadow the bigger picture of your parenting.

Stay tuned for my next two posts, where I'll be sharing my top tips for managing these difficult feelings ❤️

Do you ever experience screen time guilt in your parenting? Have you found any effective ways of managing it?

I am so pleased to be welcoming the lovely Dr Hannah Sugarman to my team as a Clinical Associate! ⋒

Hannah is a UK-trained Clinical Psychologist with over 15 years of experience in the field of mental health. She will be working alongside me as an associate so that we can offer even more therapeutic help and support.

Hannah and I have been following each other around the globe for years... first, we studied at the same university in London; then we worked alongside each other at Central Minds Clinic, in Hong Kong; and now we've both relocated back to the UK with a young family in tow. So it seemed only natural to keep our professional relationship going and have Hannah join The Mind Atelier team!

Hannah's specialisms include:
⋒ Stress, overwhelm & burnout
⋒ Anxiety, including OCD & health anxiety
⋒ Depression & low self-esteem
⋒ Perfectionism & people-pleasing
⋒ Physical health related stress (incl. CF, MUS)
⋒ Parental stress
⋒ Pre & postnatal anxiety & depression
⋒ Work-related stress

Swipe to learn more about Dr Hannah Sugarman, and visit www.drtessbrowne.com to enquire about her availability for upcoming therapy slots.

Ready to improve your sleep? ⋒

If you've been struggling with ...

→ disturbed, difficult sleep
→ negative thoughts and unrealistic expectations around sleep
→ feeling trapped in a cycle of insomnia that you can't escape
→ sleep-related safety behaviours, such as lying in bed 'trying to sleep, constantly checking the time and using coffee and naps to cope the next day
.. here are some simple sleep hygiene strategies that will enhance the quality and quantity of your sleep:

01 | Maintain a consistent bedtime.
↳ Sticking to the same sleep and wake times helps your circadian rhythm to regulate. This allows your body to predict and prepare for rest and for activity, helping you to fall asleep faster and stay asleep.

02 | Reserve your bed for sleeping.
↳ Having a cosy, comfortable space that is just reserved for sleeping helps your brain and body to recognise that when you are in bed, it's time for resting. Avoid watching tv or checking your phone whilst you are in bed to help reinforce the habit of sleep.

03 | Limit caffeine and alcohol.
↳ As a stimulant, caffeine blocks the adenosine 'sleep' receptors in our brains, increasing our alertness. Although alcohol can encourage relaxation at first, it also leads to poor quality disrupted sleep and increased night wakings.

04 | Move your body.
↳ Exercise promotes good sleep hygiene in many ways. It has been linked to increased need for sleep, greater ease in falling asleep, enhanced sleep quality, reduced cortisol levels (meaning less stress) and a better established circadian rhythm.

05 | Get in the sun.
↳ Exposure to sunlight affects our melatonin levels, a hormone which helps to regulate sleep. Early sunshine is important, as well as reducing blue light for at least 3 hours before bedtime and creating a dark environment when your head hits the pillow.

06 | Establish bedtime rituals.
↳ Quiet and calm bedtime rituals can help ease the transition towards sleep, by preparing us both mentally and physically. Your ritual could include taking a warm bath, reading a few pages of your book or listening to some peaceful music - whatever helps you to feel relaxed 😌

These strategies might seem simple but they really do work! Good sleep hygiene doesn't have to be complicated. Better sleep will help regulate your mood and boost your emotional and physical wellbeing and resilience.

Which of these strategies are you already using? Are there any others you recommend? ⋒

Does your head ever hit the pillow & suddenly your brain wakes up? ⋒

This happens to us all from time-to-time but is more common if you're experiencing acute stress, anxiety, a loss or trauma or some form of physical pain, discomfort or illness. Whilst these factors may be responsible for the onset of sleep difficulties, it is often our negative thoughts about sleep, in addition to certain behaviours we do to try to address the problem, which are responsible for 𝘮𝘢𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘢𝘪𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨 sleep problems and insomnia.

The negative thinking that often accompanies difficulties falling asleep can result in anxiety, increased muscle tension, heart palpitations, shallow breathing and physiological restlessness. These have the knock-on effect of making it even harder to fall asleep.

We may then engage in certain behaviours, intended to address the problem, but which actually, inadvertently, make the problem worse. In my previous posts, you might have seen that these are known as 'sleep-related safety behaviours' and include maladaptive coping strategies such as, staying in bed "trying" to sleep, constantly checking the time, using our phone to alleviate boredom, or having daytime naps.

These behaviours serve to maintain difficulties sleeping, and before long you can become stuck in a vicious cycle.

Can you relate to this experience? ⋒

"I need to be up in four hours"
"I'll never get to sleep now"
"If I don't get 8 hours sleep I won't be able to cope"

Recognise any of these thoughts? ☝

The way we think about our sleep, of lack of it, significantly contributes to how well we do, or don't sleep.

Here are four common thinking habits that can disrupt our ability to sleep:

01 | Catastrophising or assuming the worst about the meaning or cause of sleep problems. E.g. "I'll be so tired tomorrow I won't be able to cope" or "I've slept badly all week, I must have insomnia".

02 | Blaming everything that goes wrong in the day on lack of sleep, when there could be another explanation. E.g. "I'm only snappy with my partner because I haven't slept".

03 | Unrealistic expectations about how much sleep you actually need to function. Setting strict rules (e.g. I 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥 8 hours sleep) can lead to anxiety when this rule is broken.

04 | Extreme or "all or nothing" thinking. E.g. labelling a night's sleep as "good" or bad" without making space for it being "ok" or "good enough".

Stay tuned for my next post, where I'll explore how these negative thought patterns can leave us vulnerable to a vicious cycle of poor sleep. Over the next couple of weeks, I'll also be sharing some sleep strategies designed to improve your sleep and some affirmations to help you reframe those negative thoughts.

Have you found any ways to help deal with these unhelpful thinking habits about sleep? ⋒

What is 'good' sleep? 😴

Sleep is crucial to our overall health and well-being. The many benefits of getting good sleep consistently include:

⋒ Energy restoration
⋒ Stress management
⋒ Mood regulation
⋒ Sharper memory & concentration
⋒ Improved work performance & productivity
⋒ Improved physical health & resilience
⋒ Growth & muscle repair
⋒ Faster recovery from illness or injury
⋒ Better relationships

However, it's important to have realistic beliefs about sleep to avoid holding yourself accountable to rigid, unrealistic expectations (e.g. I 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥 8 hours sleep per night). Strict rules around sleep can leave you vulnerable to anxiety if you perceive you are not adhering to them.

Here are some gentle truths about the individuality of sleep:

⋒ Healthy adults typically need between 7-9 hours of sleep per night. Children need more for growth & development, and older adults need a little less.

⋒"Good" sleepers usually take less than 30 minutes to fall
asleep and may wake once or twice during the night.

⋒ Even the best sleepers will have occasional nights
when it takes them a long time to get to sleep. This is often
triggered by a stressful event and usually passes after a
night or two.

⋒ Similarly, everybody will have an occasional night when they find it difficult to get back to sleep after waking in the middle of the night.

⋒ Being a "morning person" or "night owl" is genetically determined. Approximately 30% of us are morning types, 30% are evening types and the rest of us are in the middle or are a combination of the two.

⋒ You can’t catch up on sleep - a few extra hours at the weekend will not reverse chronic sleep debt. Instead, try to reintroduce a steady sleep routine for at least two weeks.

Are you a morning person 🌅 or a night owl 🦉?

⋒ World Sleep Day ⋒

Today is World Sleep Day! A day that's designed to raise sleep health awareness around the world.

We all know that sleep is important, yet so many of us neglect it until it becomes problematic. Sleep is both psychologically and physiologically restorative. It is considered one of the four pillars of health, the foundations for good physical and emotional health and wellbeing.

Often, we are led to believe that 'healthy sleep' or 'good sleep' is simply conducive with 'enough sleep'. This can cause us to become fixated on getting the 'right number' of hours of sleep, trying to 'catch up' on sleep hours when we've missed out and becoming stressed and anxious about not getting 'enough'.

Healthy sleep is not as rigid as being confined to a set number of hours. In fact, according to the World Sleep Day toolkit, there are six dimensions of sleep health:

⋒ Duration
↳ How much did you sleep over 24 hours? Not everyone will 'need' the same amount of sleep.

⋒ Efficiency
↳ How easily do you fall asleep and stay asleep?

⋒ Timing
↳ When do you sleep?

⋒ Regularity
↳ Do you have consistent sleep and wake times?

⋒ Alertness
↳ Do you maintain good focus and attention during waking hours?

⋒ Quality
↳ Do you feel well-rested and satisfied with your sleep?

If you're worried about your sleep health, stay tuned! Over the next few weeks, I'm going to be sharing more about sleep health including information about unhealthy sleep behaviours, affirmations for sleep, self-care practices to improve your sleep and tips to establish a consistent sleep routine.

How is your sleep at the moment? Are you well-rested 😴 or feeling the effects of sleep deprivation 😵?

⬆️⬆️⬆️ THIS IS MY WHY ⬆️⬆️⬆️

These words, on a brief email from an ex client, popped up in my inbox recently, five years after we finished working together. I cannot tell you how happy I was to receive this message 😀

Please know that, after our therapeutic work ends, I still hold you in mind. I often wonder how you are doing, what challenges you have faced and how you have navigated those challenges.

Occasionally, I am blessed to have ex-clients, like the one above, get in touch with me out of the blue to share with me how they are doing. This happens more often than you'd think. And it literally fills my bucket!

To know that the work we do together is still impactful many many years later, is the ultimate compliment and gives me so much purpose and drive to keep doing the work that I do.

So if you've been thinking about reaching out to someone who supported you in your past, be it a therapist, friend or colleague, this is your sign to do so. Trust me, you will absolutely make their week ✨✨✨

✨ Guest Podcast Episode - For Therapists ✨

It's taken me a while to post this but it deserves a place on my grid because it was such a rich and inspiring conversation, which I think is of real value to any therapists navigating the demands of entrepreneurship and the demands of caring for their own well-being.

I had the absolute pleasure of sitting down with and to explore the link between entrepreneurship and mental health.

We talked about:
⋒ How the demands of entrepreneurship impact mental health
⋒ Practical strategies for achieving balance between entrepreneurship and well-being
⋒ Inspiring, personal stories and the lessons we've learned on our entrepreneurship journeys
⋒ How we support entrepreneurs via our own practices

You can listen on Spotify, Apple Podcast or YouTube. Search "Dr Tess Breaking the Mould of Private Practice" to give it a listen.

And if there are any themes that came up in the episode that you want support with, in terms of navigating the demands of your therapy private practice and mental health, send me a DM to learn more about my business coaching services for therapists.

Thinking of all the mamas today… whatever this day means to you 💕

When it comes to acts of kindness, it’s often the small changes that make all the difference.

You don’t have to show compassion through a grand gesture.

It could be as simple as calling a friend that you haven’t spoken to in a while, helping a vulnerable neighbour with their shopping, or saying ‘good morning’ to passers-by as you go about your day.

Acts of kindness, however big or small, can have significant benefits … not only for the receiver, but for the giver too.

According to the Mental Health Foundation, research has found that those who are kind and compassionate experience significant benefits to their well-being and happiness, possible increases in life expectancy and reduced stress levels.

Let’s delve deeper into the health benefits of giving kindness 👇🏼

⋒ Helping others to feel good has been linked to increased feelings of well-being, can improve our support networks and encourage us to be more active - which has the added benefit of boosting our self-esteem!

⋒ Being compassionate to those around us helps to create, maintain and strengthen our social connections. Acts such as volunteering can foster a sense of belonging and connection, as well as reducing feelings of loneliness and isolation.

⋒ Doing good deeds for others can help to keep aspects of our own life in perspective, highlighting the things that we are grateful for and increasing feelings of happiness, optimism and satisfaction.

⋒ On Saturday it was ‘Random Acts of Kindness Day’. The idea behind this day is to make kindness ‘the norm’ … as one act of kindness can often lead to more! Your small act of kindness might encourage those around you to behave in the same way, leading to a more positive, confident and optimistic community for us all.

Remember, kindness doesn’t have to be big or grand or seemingly life-altering for it to have a positive impact on both the giver and the receiver. Start small, and let me know in the comments about any random acts of kindness that cross your path this week.