Lucy Biggs - Present Ascent - Independent Funeral Celebrant, Cheshire

A few extra pictures from my triumphant walk up this morning… plus Archer living his best life!

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[caption from reel]

On the eve of 12 years of school runs…

(I realise it won’t be quite as dramatic as this 😆… but it feels like both a significant and triumphant day!)… I’m up Shuttlingsloe by 9am. Now, don’t be deceived… I’m no early riser mountain climber as life logistics don’t typically allow, but today… all was clear, the sky was blue and I thought, why not? (Our Labrador - who has ‘underwalked syndrome’… poor thing - couldn’t believe his luck either in a break from West Park in

I realised, en route, that I haven’t been up here for around 7 years since before we were pregnant with Reuben. It was much steeper and longer than I remembered from that time, much like my perceptions of motherhood from back then too, with naturally rose tinted glasses, before life and death came crashing in on us.

Sitting up here just now, I think of the journey we have been on, the path of which led me to my funeral practice. I feel triumphant in many ways, whilst also humbled and grateful. I’m sat here thinking of the people I’ve stood alongside, the lives we’ve honoured together - the stories that have been shared with me - the words spoken in echo of those precious moments.

I’m the only soul up here - I feel the fragile nature of my body against the wind, yet I feel held by the landscape… above all of the fears and worries of our daily lives, above the roads and the busyness and the logistics that we all carry around - and I’m reminded that in the trials that many of us face, if we keep putting one foot in front of the other, in any way that we can - some days that may be just walking from your bed to a chair and then back to your bed - that is enough.

You will, in time, walk through to another place, where you’re able to look back and see how far you’ve come. It will be dark and steep and hard at times, but you can do it. There is great light within you - follow it with all your might. And if you feel unable, remember that light shines in the darkness and the darkness cannot overcome it. Keep going 🤍

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How I do like the quiet, evening hours in this role…

Whilst the world goes still and rests - when the buzz of the nearby road settles and I can hear nothing but my thoughts and the things I’m preparing.

It isn’t always easy… and not always possible - sometimes I’m too tired, but at other times, like this evening, it’s a comfort really… to pause, to reflect on the services either side of the evening.

In this role, one guides a fine balance of emotion, grief, stories, love, heartache, hopes, needs, dynamics, practical dimensions, communication, empathy, diplomacy, intuition, all mixed with finding the right dates, the right venues, the right plan for your person - it’s a lot, primarily for those I’m supporting… but in the stillness of these hours, when all is planned and ready and you look back at all that has been prepared… and you go over the words, rituals and sounds that have been gathered together and it plays the most beautiful song… it is then that I smile upon it all with gratitude, peace and calm. We are ready - ready to do all that is right and good for your person. To honour the precious nature of their life and journey. To do all that we should, together, surrounding them with love.

What a place this is to be 🤍

It has been over a year since I last introduced myself here, so… for those who’ve recently followed along…

Hello 👋 I’m Lucy. I’m an independent (or civil) funeral celebrant, which places me somewhere in between a religious leader and a humanist (do ask me more about this if you’re interested 😊)…

I help families and/or groups of friends or individuals to plan a funeral ceremony… sometimes before someone has died and also, of course, after they have died. I will often lead their ceremony too, though not always, depending on what we plan 💫.

I live in Macclesfield, at the edge of the Peak District, and I work throughout Cheshire, South Manchester and the Peak District - further afield too if needed.

At the heart of my work is creating the time and space to mark the life and death of someone that you love, in a way that feels right to you.

I have known the greatest depths of grief in having lost our first baby, Reuben, in 2018. It was this experience, and very much his legacy, that brought me to this space, 4 (now 6) years on, to support others and bring light to what can be the darkest of times. It is the greatest honour of my life to be here, in his name.

My former professional space was design academia having taught graphic design at HE institutions across the North West and also at UAL in London for the past 15 years, most recently at Manchester School of Art. My professional skills in public speaking, writing and working with a diverse range of people all compliment my celebrant role.

I’m also really proud and grateful to be a finalist at the Good Funeral Awards this year as ‘Funeral Celebrant of the Year’ ✨The awards ceremony is in September

If you’d be interested to learn more about what’s possible when it comes to funeral ceremony do get in touch, any time 🤍 💫

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Precious words here from a family I supported a few months ago. Thank you, so much, to them, for entrusting their dear brother’s ceremony to me and for sharing their experience on Google and to help others in the future.

This family did their own research on who they might like to support them; giving everyone a call just for a chat to see how that felt. That is always, always OK and such a good idea. Once they felt comfortable in working alongside me, they simply let their funeral director know and I got in touch with them to confirm. That is always OK too 🤍 Options and choice matters so much in the funeral space.

For support, or simply a chat to understand what’s possible, get in touch any time ✨

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A few changes to my practice are incoming for the autumn - all good and positive, fully aligned with what I believe to be best and right in this space, serving the families and friends of those we’re honouring with my fullest, truest heart and ensuring the very best for the time that we walk alongside each other. Naturally, I asked if she might be able to capture all that ahead of a few website changes. And my… hasn’t she done so ✨ Thank you Anna 🤍 Thank you also Pete and the team for welcoming us so warmly (literally 🌞) earlier this week!

Alongside supporting families and friends as we honour their special person, being present for our young family and half living at 😄… I’ve been reflecting, making notes (again and again and again), preparing, re-shaping, re-considering - ensuring that, at all times, I was (and will continue to be) staying true to myself and the light and death that brought me to this space.

How grateful I am to be here. How grateful I am for every person and their family and friends whom I’ve supported. Each ceremony has enabled me to serve, to reflect and to grow. I’ll never take that for granted, nor what it has meant for you in your own journeys.

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Thank you… 📸 Anna for the light that you can always see - for adjusting my thinking and starting me off on 7 months of reflections at Aura back in January - for continually inspiring and encouraging me 🌟 I’ve also recently learned that my nomination/invitation came from a family I’ve supported - how very precious and how very grateful I am to them.

Ah, some lovely news this evening… I’m a finalist for ‘Funeral Celebrant of the Year’ at the Good Funeral Awards. I was also a finalist for ‘Most Promising Newcomer’ last year so it’s lovely to be recognised in this way again. A dear family that I’ve supported several times, very sadly ✨✨, made me promise to get involved again this year and very kindly wrote my first nomination - my thanks and gratitude to them. So many of you here have also, very kindly and generously, written nominations and each one is so appreciated. Thank you.

At the centre of all that I do is… you… your person… the people I support every day. I would not be here if it weren’t for the drive to support you exceptionally well and ensure that your ceremony is as right as possible for your person. These awards are not about blowing my own trumpet, they are about raising the bar of what is the expected/standard level of care in the celebrancy space - there is so much change afoot, for the better, and I’m so glad about that. I’ll keep shining my light in this space, advocating always for options and choice for families and holding each person that we honour at the centre of everything that we do during our time together. It matters so very much.

A huge well done to all who were nominated in this category. The finalists are a wonderfully progressive bunch, all of whom I admire and have been deeply inspired by in my own journey including .smiley.celebrant KV of plus Dave Gordon-Shute (who I don’t know, but well done to him too)

And so… off I go to the Eden Project for the awards in September. Cornwall is a very special place to us as we visited after our son, Reuben, died in 2018. He is the reason I work in this space now, so… I’ll be so glad and grateful to return.

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Lucy x

Today I supported others in a way that I always hoped to be fully possible when I began my funeral practice two years ago. It was such a beautiful and sacred time and it brings me so much peace to have done so.

I’ve learnt over the past few years to feel, hear and truly listen to this feeling within myself - those very clear indicators of what is right and good - fully aligned with exactly where you’re supposed to be. How grateful I am for all that today was.

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Funeral / Celebration of Life / Memorial options and choice matter so much. Get in touch to talk about what’s possible at any stage of potentially needing some support, either currently, shortly or into the future.

You’re in the safest of hands,
Lucy x

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A calm and quiet evening of writing - it feels like quite a while since I’ve rested into one of these after a week away last week.

This role is… naturally, and rightly so… so much: it is listening, it is instinct on options and suggestions, it is writing, it is communicating well and with great care, it is keeping track of hopes and possibilities, it is project management at times, it is guidance on deadlines, it is logistics planning of space, time and items that we may need, it is you… the people I’m supporting… and your person, always, at the heart of it all.

It is hard at times to gracefully and calmly move between all the pillars of need and preparation, but I do my absolute best for everyone I support.

Times like this though, the quiet times, draw me back to the centre of it all - your person, their life, their loves, their story.

A treasured family member said to me today, “I don’t know how you do this all the time?” My reply? “It is an honour to support you and to be able to ensure that we are doing what is right. That matters so very much.”

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One final reflection from today…. Every day is a gift, not a given. Treat it with the absolute best that you can. Of course… that is hard to do sometimes, so be kind to yourself in your efforts.

Lucy x

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How I love this little bronze bunny - purchased for my birthday whilst on honeymoon in Stockholm - and now connected to our first son, looking up to the sky ✨ Plus featuring a gifted print from .hiley.art that I treasure

Taking a moment to pause and eat my lunch outside on a day full of support for others. The warmth of the July air, the brightness of the light, the sounds of our neighbourhood, remind me so acutely of July 2018 when I felt so incredibly broken. We had come through all of our son’s significant dates, his funeral had been, and I was left, for months really, just sitting in the aftermath of it all.

If you are navigating grief, seasons, anniversaries, do go gently with it all. None of it is easy.

As my good friend and wise counsel said me to a few years ago, “Darling, it is not just a date [with reference to an anniversary that day] - it is the air, the light, the smell of the house at that time… maybe life always is made up of the experiences… the love and sadness… the awful things that carry pain and then the joyous things that help us mend… that make up the days of our life”

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Go gently.

Lucy x

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I’ve had this image for some time…✨

…waiting for the the right moment to write about it. It’s of a number of things prepared to take to for a precious person’s service last year - I’ve developed a bit of a reputation there for bringing my own furniture 😌

When I take care of the time during which we honour your person’s life and death… their funeral, celebration of life or memorial… the whole space matters… not solely the words we prepare together for the day, but the space (including the light, the temperature of it, the smells in the air), the furniture in the room and how we use it well in order to best support those who come… and the things I bring too…

Here you can see my candle table (if candles are what you might like) - it’s precious to our family as it belonged to my grandparents… during your space and time it is an unspoken gift to your family. It matters to me that a candle table looks suitable in the space… that’s it’s not too high, not too low, that it doesn’t hold some other function like a chest of drawers (unless you’d like your person’s chest of drawers there, of course!), that it’s not too new and not too old… that’s it’s not plastic… that if it’s got a table cloth on that it’s been ironed and/or been made in a fabric that means something to you… that the candles are real (though not all chapels enable this or have alternatives…) and… if you wanted to use your own family table, you could bring it along or I could pick it up in a advance… and that would be fine. So much to say, just on a table!

Then there’s the candle(s)… it matters that they’re new, for you, even if we only burn them for a short while and that they’re of a colour that means something to your person - for some, that’s white, for others it might be hot pink or sunny yellow. That’s all ok. Some might like one candle, some might like 6. That’s also ok…

Continued in the comments…

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Back in Oct 2022 I went to an international, online Death Cafe hosted by the wonderful Rosalie - on the call there were people present from all around the world. There were around 10 of us on the call and during the introductions, one lady said…, “I’m in a town in Cheshire, England - I doubt you’d have heard of it… Frodsham.” Well, that’s only where I grew up and I live just ‘down the road’ in Macclesfield now. And so… the wonderful Iris and I made a great connection that evening.

Fast forward to April 2023 and Iris hosted a Death Cafe in Frodsham… there I met so many wonderful folk including who was, at the time, penning her first nonfiction book… an A-Z of all things death related. Sara came that day also which was so very lovely.

Fast forward again to June 2024… Sophie’s book is about to be published (well done Sophie ✨) and I’m so grateful and proud that our story of Reuben’s life and death and a little of Stephen and I’s navigation of that is within the chapters. I’ve only read a small part of the book when we were preparing our contribution but what I read was so very wonderful.

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If you’re interested in learning, questioning and growing all things ‘death-conversation’… Sophie’s book is available to pre order now…

D is for Death: Mortality Explored: Stories, Insights & Reflections

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Thought you might be interested too…

🤍 ✨ Always an honour - thank you Legacy Funeral Care

So grateful to have Ruth playing a vital role in the funeral landscape of Macclesfield, especially in being both independent and female-led. Ruth is based up on Hurdsfield Road - she’s excellent and provides families with the highest level of care.

Tomorrow marks what would have been our son, Reuben’s, 6th birthday. My funeral role came to be because of him. I share this here not to speak about myself in a space that is for others, but simply to honour him, to thank him, somehow, and also to share that I know the depths of the pain and the loss and the struggle as the years pass by. It’s what brings me here with such calmness - to stand by your side, through it all.

It’s taken me some time… 6 months in fact, to prepare this very special testimonial for this space…

I treasure Gen’s words and that I was able to support them and their family and honour their grandma, Joyce, in the most special of ways alongside Kate .old.chapel.etruria and Lucy

Gen has encapsulated here all that I hoped to be in this space… and so… I’ll let the words speak for themselves in the carousel above ⬆️

Thank you, Gen, and family ✨ 🤍

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If you need support with a funeral, memorial, celebration of life, living funeral, either presently or looking ahead to future months or years, do reach out any time to talk about what’s possible.

www.presentascent.co.uk

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Shared here with kind permission

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🌑 I found myself in *that* mental space a few days ago… (you know, the unhelpful kind… until I got a grip of it…)

… thinking maybe it is just simply, always awful [when people die]. Maybe it simply cannot be ‘made better’ by what a service includes nor covers. Maybe my work is not needed here, because it is plainly always awful to go through - no one can help.

But then… I paused… and reflected…

How very needed it is. Because the life of each person matters so very much. Because how we honour the end of their life matters so very much. Because the grief journey and experience of those in attendance matters so much. Because there are (sadly) sometimes a lot of challenges for people to navigate in the funeral space. Because it is so important to shine light into it.

Because it matters. So much.
Because your person matters. So much.

Because to stand alongside those in the midst of ‘awful’ matters. Because to stand beside them and acknowledge, with complete care and safety, that it cannot always ‘be made better’ - even by a ‘good’ funeral - matters.

And so…. on I go, so grateful to be here to serve in all that matters in this space.

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As a side note… have you rested on this seat ‘hidden’ within the landscape at Teggs Nose? Captured here by The words carved into the stone are by Tagore, “They who speak to me do not know that my heart is full with your unspoken words. They who crowd my path do not know that I am walking alone with you.” I’ve been reflecting on those words for several years now 🤍

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✨ Just a few weeks of nomination time left…

If I’ve supported you in the past few years, whether through a ceremony for your special person, through social media/a talk/learning, maybe a Funeral Feast meal or simply a chat about funeral options and choice… I’d hugely appreciate your support at the Good Funeral Awards having been nominated for Celebrant of the Year.

The nominations focus is on, “all the things this person has done to go above and beyond their normal course of duty” so… whatever that means to you, based on what you know of me… do consider sharing your words with the Good Funeral Awards judges.

You can access the nomination form via the link in my IG bio or here:

https://www.agfdgoodfuneralawards.co.uk/nomination

The website/form isn’t the easiest to navigate so if you struggle at all, drop me a message and I’ll email you the form with my contact details pre-filled for administrative ease 🤗

T H A N K Y O U to those who’ve kindly nominated me already and W E L L D O N E to all my fellow celebrants and funeral professionals in this space who’ve been nominated also 🤍

It means, frankly, everything to me to be here and with the awards ceremony location of Cornwall being so closely connected to our son, Reuben, too, it’s even moreso a special situation having been a finalist last year.

🌟 Thank you for your support 🌟

Lucy

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✨A note on milestones…

I’m currently supporting several families - their time and space for their special person encircling my 100th ceremony. Of course, my approach and recognition of this is a sensitive one… I don’t consider this ‘milestone’ in my practice as a ‘a number’ nor a celebratory factor… I speak of it more in reverence and gratitude for all those I’ve stood alongside in that time - each precious person’s story that I have learned of - each name that I have been entrusted with speaking aloud into the great space of absence, grief and honour. I feel grateful, to have come to this space and time… and I think of this milestone as… almost literally… a stone of great beauty really, like the actual ‘milestones’ one encounters along the canal or a path… a recognition of travel, for us all - each person I’ve walked alongside… all of the journeys we go on in this life, and in death. I feel it’s important to recognise these points and markers - to acknowledge them, to bow the head for a moment, even if solely mentally.

My Pop’s service was my 1st, two years ago this week, and my Nan’s was my 2nd - I wore her scarf of blue sea birds today as we honoured a precious life connected to the Navy. I wear her lovely, light summer coat when I meet with families at this time of year. I hold them both close to my heart and journey every day. Wherever you’re at on your broader journey or current path - keep going - “do continue your struggle” - there is always light to be found, even on the hardest of days.

Lucy x

Thank you to for reminding me to keeping writing as we sat sunset chatting with this weekend - both, coincidentally, enabled this beautiful image 🤍

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We’ve come away to the Lakes for the week as a family for a short pause... it’s good to have a change of environment and a change of pace.

The nature of my role in this space means that it can co-exist, very gently, with times like this as a family. Today, I sat with this view for a short while as I offered some support. What a vista to honour that moment.

When I returned to the main house, I picked up the history of the building and read about its founders in the 1800s - another Lucy, and her husband, Alfred - the house being completed in 1855, two years after Lucy’s death and one year before Alfred’s, both dying relatively young… followed by numerous tragedies, sadly, in the generations of owners that followed. Interestingly, Lucy & Alfred were the grandparents of Lawrence Binyon who wrote the very well-known poem, ‘For the Fallen’, often shared on Remembrance Sunday and in funeral ceremonies.

An extract:
“They shall grow not old, as we that are left grow old:
Age shall not weary them, nor the years condemn.
At the going down of the sun and in the morning
We will remember them.”

I’m always grateful for these connections to my practice that seem to find me (or maybe I sniff them out subconsciously!) when I’m elsewhere - the stories of people’s precious lives, the pain and the questioning they have walked, the houses that have held it all.

I’ve held my own grandparents very close whilst here - the beautiful interiors remind me of my Nan and the rhododendrons remind me of my Pop’s anniversary month of May. I thought to myself this morning, “how can all of this still be here - the plants - the smells - the feel of this familiar place, yet they are not?” By the stories I’ve read today, I’m reminded that all of the loss, all the questioning, all the sadness, and their (and so many others’) absence, is so intrinsically a part of this life - many, many, many have walked these roads before us. This doesn’t negate our own experiences, questioning and navigation, or course, but it comforts me, somehow, that it all rests across the air, the trees, the stones we walk upon. Maybe if we whisper our questions into the great, wide air, we might find some answers.

✨I’ve been a little quiet on here of late… ✨

I’ve always been one to follow my instinct and energy with social media rather than plan out my strategy and go… no, no. This work is, of course, a sacred space, particularly with regards to words and messages and if they don’t come to me very naturally, they don’t land here usually.

Social media and funerals… not a straight forward combination… How does one strike the balance between sharing the most important of concepts relating to the most challenging of situations, in a way that doesn’t shock folk too much mid-lunch break, nor make them feel sad in a way they weren’t expecting, nor turn them away from that which I know to be so, so important for us all to consider, discuss and share… these are the questions that tick over in my mind almost day in relation to posting.

One thing I care about so, so much is as many people as possible knowing about funeral options and choice… and how to navigate them - but why? So that they may choose to work with me? No, not at all. So that they may know what’s possible and how to arrange it when they find themselves needing to prepare a ceremony for their special person.

We will each only have one funeral… it matters so much that that ceremony is as right as possible for the person who has died, along with those in attendance (in whatever form a ceremony takes) - particularly in relation to the navigation of grief both before, during and after.

When I find myself fully committed with services, naturally, my time and energy in the social media space falls to the bottom of the priority list… I also need to retain my focus as best I can and the internet doesn’t aid this, as we all know… but I am always still here, thinking… pondering… how best can I share what I believe to be so important?

And so, I’ll continue on… as and when the words and messages come to me… today’s sunshine at filled my mind with energy for future days and reminded me of the hope and trust that is so needed in this space.

Wherever you find the essence of your light, keep shining it 🤍

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Sharing some kind words here from a family that I had the honour of standing alongside recently.

It matters so very much to me how I might best support you on the day. Every person, their life story and their ceremony is unique. I’ll do my utmost to make space for the feelings and emotions that you may be navigating in the ceremony space and I will always do my best to guide you through the time we spend there.

You are in safe hands.

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Shared here with kind permission 🤍✨

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✨ A Treacle Market tale… ✨

One of the many great, great pleasures of living and truly belonging in Macclesfield is experiencing our treasured on the last Sunday of each month.

This past Sunday, it was a delight, as ever, to saunter through the stalls and people.

Now… I’ve been looking for a shell for some time. Our daughter has clocked the beautiful concept of listening to the sea within one. My Nan had a shell in her bathroom when we were children and we’d all gather round with great excitement to listen in. I was always enchanted by the concept and, of course, I believed it to be true.

I feel a great emotional and spiritual connection to the sea when I visit, as I’m sure many of us do… but I often wonder to what extent this has come from my Nan sewing the seeds of its beauty and preciousness through her shell.

On Sunday, there it was… with great excitement my daughter and I held it to our ears… and this precious ceramic piece… is now ours. You can, of course, hear the sea within it 🌊 😊

Its relevance here is one of legacy… of how we remain in our loved ones lives… of how we pass on the beauty of our beliefs and stories and imaginings into the lives of countless generations. Of how we continue to live, through these precious objects.

Whilst this shell is not our childhood original… the concept has often perplexed me - how can ‘meaningless’ objects survive longer than the physical presence of the person whom we love? Why do physical objects not have a finite lifespan, and humans live for eternity? I don’t have a coherent answer for myself, nor for you all, but one day I might. All I know for now is that the preciousness of this life, the great mystery of our existence, and our finite lifespan lead us to places of both great pain and great love. And maybe without our understanding and experience of pain, love… courage… empathy might not exist at all.

If you’re missing someone, hold onto the objects through which they live. The connection really matters.

This shell has a great crack down one side. Part broken. Part whole. Much like life.

Keep going 🤍