The Drone News

"I didn’t know what Sean-Nós was until last week," Gunn admitted while holding her newly won trophy. "But I thought, how hard could it be? Irish dancing is just like breakdancing with less swagger, right?"

BREAKDANCER 'RAY-GUNN' STUNS TRADITIONALISTS, WINS SEAN-NOS DANCING AT THE FLEADH The world of traditional Irish dance was turned on its head this past as breakdancer Rachael Gunn, known for her animal impressions, secured an unprecedented victory in the Sean-Nós dancing competition at the All-Ireland Fleadh Cheoil.Gunn, also known as ‘Ray-Gunn’, stunned audiences and judges...

'As the ear-piercing symphony of chaos came to a close, adjudicators were left clutching their heads, wondering if a World Record could be set for mass-suffering, but indeed it had.'

WORLD RECORD NUMBER OF HEADACHES CAUSED BY FLEADH TIN WHISTLE WORLD RECORD ATTEMPT In another toe-curling attempt to make traditional Irish music more 'mainstream', Cult-Ass has inadvertently set two new World Records: the first by having the most amount of tin whistles playing at the same time, and the second, the most amount of headaches caused by having to listen to said World....

'The controversy continued when conertina player O'Luanaigh tested positive for B/C tuning rather than standard D tuning on the concertina, leading to questions surrounding him being born an accordion player. However, these claims were unfounded when it turned out he just listened to a lot of Joe Burke recordings.'

'NOT A CASE OF A MULTI-INSTRUMENTALIST': CULT-ASS ADDRESS CONCERTINA PLAYER SUPPOSEDLY BORN AN ACCORDION PLAYER AT THE FLEADH Traditional music overlords Cult-Ass have denied that there is a case of a multi-instrumentalist entering the concertina competition at this year's Fleadh after another competitor pulled out after only playing one round of their first tune.It has been reported that the concertina player in question,...

SIMONE BILES WINS GOLD THANKS TO TONY MCMAHON AND NOEL HILL. (VIDEO)

SIMONE BILES WINS OLYMPIC GOLD THANKS TO TONY MCMAHON AND NOEL HILL Simone Biles thanked Noel Hill and the late Tony McMahon for the use of their track 'The Ashplant' during her floor routine at the 2024 Olympic Games.

DEVASTATING NEWS! The Drone News retired original founder Tansey von Frankiegavin has been killed in a terrible blimp related disaster. While innocently out walking his 9 cats, Tansey was hit by a Trump Blimp and thrown inches through the air to his untimely death. This tragedy marks 27 blimp related accidents involving Tansey von Frankiegavin this year. Please keep Tansey in your prayers as our new Editor begins restructuring The Drone News website. Keep an eye out for new posts as we start up again after 4 years of 'laying low'. XOXOXO Love ya.

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