Mwalimu Massud Tv

Good morning?

If you drink enough water in the morning, you will feel happier, sharper, and more energetic throughout the day.

LIFE LESSONS

1. Build a home earlier. Be it rural home or urban home. Building a house at 50 is not an achievement. Don't get used to government houses. This comfort is so dangerous. Let all your family have good time in your house.

2. Go home. Don't stick at work all the year. You are not the pillar of your department. If you drop dead today, you will be replaced immediately and operations will continue. Make your family a priority.

3. Don't chase promotions. Master your skills and be excellent at what you do. If they want to promote you, that's fine if they don't, stay positive to your personal.
development.

4. Avoid office or work gossip. Avoid things that tarnish your name or reputation. Don't join the bandwagon that backbites your bosses and colleagues. Stay away from negative gatherings that have only people as their agenda.

5. Don't ever compete with your bosses. You will burn your fingers. Don't compete with your colleagues, you will fry your brain.

6. Ensure you have a side business. Your salary will not sustain your needs in the long run.

7. Save some money. Let it be deducted automatically from your payslip.

8. Borrow a loan to invest in a business or to change a situation not to buy luxury. Buy luxury from your profit.

9. Keep your life,marriage and family private. Let them stay away from your work. This is very important.

10. Be loyal to yourself and believe in your work. Hanging around your boss will alienate you from your colleagues and your boss may finally dump you when he leaves.

11. Retire early. The best way to plan for your exit was when you received the employment letter. The other best time is today. By 40 to 50 be out.

12. Join work welfare and be an active member always. It will help you a lot when any eventuality occurs.

13.Take leave days utilize them by developing yr future home or projects..usually what you do during yr leave days is a reflection of how you'll live after retirement..If it means you spend

🚨🔴 | 𝐔𝐏𝐃𝐀𝐓𝐄: FC Bayern have scheduled meeting to officially confirm to Julian Nagelsmann that he has been fired — as revealed yesterday night 🔚🔴

▫️ The German coach is now expected at Säbener Straße in order to proceed with official communication.

▫️ His original deal was due to expire in June 2026 but Nagelsmann will leave with immediate effect.

The Ramadhan crescent moon has been spotted in Mandera, Wajir and Tana River Counties.

The Deputy Chief Kadhi Sheikh Sukyan Hassan has confirmed, the Holy month of Ramadhan to begin tomorrow.

Ramadhan Mubarak to all fellow Muslims!

I used to be told by mum not to climp trees top because men could see my pants....but I was clever I would remove my pants and climb happily 🤣🤣

HaHassan mwana wa AliwHassan mwana wa AliaHassan mwana wa AlilHassan mwana wa Ali

The great manchester united has done it again

Ukiona wasee wa mjengo wakikula nyama lunch 😋😋 wee jua tu kuna gunia ya simiti imepotea 😂

Goodnight

I remember when I was admitted at Mathare Mental Hospital in 2020, I planned to run away from the hospital with my friend Joshua.

We started planning and agreed that we will go to the gate, bēat up the watchman, open the gate and run away 🏃‍♂️💨

So the next day the watchman was very hungry, He could not see someone who would help him stay at the gate so that he can go and buy something to eat.

Inorder for him to go out, he had to leave the gate wide open so that vehicles can come in without noticing his absence from the gate.

When we reached the gate, we noticed the watchman was not there and the gate was wide open.

We turned to each other and said, "s**t!!! Our plan has failed, lets go back, we will try again tomorrow."

😄
MbaMbaruk Mwalimualimu
BilBilly Miyaya
LucLucie Mbayiayi
LitLittle BrianiLittle Brian

Happening today
Billy Miya na Mbaruk Mwalimu

Good morning

" Beiby, umefika wapi sahisi? Lakini umepanda si ndiyo? Naa, ukiona unezafika saa ngapi?" Texts of a stranded Kenyan somewhere

Manchester united will dismantle southampton today

'58

Bruno scores

Manchester United 3 - 1 Real Betis

'32

Ayoze Perez scores

Manchester 1 - 1 Real Betis

FT

Sporting 2-2 Arsenal

'6

Rashford scores

Manchester United 1 - 0 Real Betis

Whenever I see this, I remember the FUNNY but Touching STORY Professor Magoha said about a mad man with his smartphone, who kept tapping and tapping and tapping to ... 𝘀𝗲𝗲 𝗺𝗼𝗿𝗲

Valentine ni ya madem wako na flat tummy.
Wabunge nyinyi muende mngojee marupurupu😂💔🤝

K**a uoni jina lako ama la bae uliza
😹😹😹😹
1. Clinton---mchafu na n wezi
2. Ivan---mshene na wakora
3. Vinny---kujichocha
4. James----mang'aa
5. peter---mkarimu
6. Thomas---kiherehere na brownskin
7. Edwin---tangatanga
8. Frank----silent killer
9. Jonte---wivu
10. Brayo---double dealing
11. kevo---tamaa
12. patho---wapate na mabibi zavwatu
13. Dancan---sura mbaya na bang
14. Jackson---mstingy
15. Livingston---pretender
16. Zacky--- wafupi na wanono
17. Ian---vitombi
18. Jose---kutamani za watu
19. Bonny----hasira Kali
20.Felix---maringo na wacute
21. Samuel--wanapenda pombe
22. Justo---wacute but walevi
23. Isaac---wezi
24. Simon----waminifu Kwa ndoa
25. Victor----smile Kwa wanawake ovyo ovyo
26.Paul---talkative and pretender
27. Ben---date ovyo ovyo na Ako na wamama
28. Caleb---mtaka za Bure
29. lyncon---c wacute but roho safi
30. jeff---roho mbaya na n walevi
31.Dommy--- gay na wamebeba matako
32.Mose-- kuzaa nje watoto wengi
33.Willy ---Good boy and faithful

💆🧟🧟

WOMEN.
18Yrs=> I don't date broke men.
20Yrs=>I don't date ugly guys.
24Yrs=>Pregnant.
25Yrs=>My child, my everything.
27Yrs=>I love the woman I'm becoming.
29Yrs=>Men are good. We didn't fall into the right hands. You'll get one who will love you fully.
30Yrs=>We don't go for the appearance. We are for peace and stability.
32Yrs=>Only a mature man can love you the way you are.
35Yrs=>Hello Gidi na Ghost, ni Maureen from Rongai, I am a mother of two, natafuta bwana atanipenda, anioe na anionyeshe mapenzi na watoto wangu wawili. Please help.
40Yrs=>Nikipata mtu tu ata k**a hana kitu, bora tu ako na nyumba namkwamilia.
42Yrs=>Pastor Ezekiel, nataka nyota ya ndoa. Naomba maombi.
Pastor Ezekiel..Dada hauna nyota🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Me: nataka kufa
People: Usiseme Ivo maneno ya mdomo iko Na nguvu
Me: nataka gari
People: unadhan gari inanunuliwa na mdomo 🤷🤷🤷

Ametuma brathakee mdogo akuje aniambie "its over"sijawai tandika mtoto ivo😠😡🥴😂😂😂

Manchester United have won twenty titles, the most of any club. United's rivals Liverpool are second with nineteen.

Lulu invited me over for a dinner in their house so I could meet her parents 😊.

While we were eating, it started raining heavily, So her mother said,

"Eric, I think you should sleep over here because the rain shows no sign of stopping anytime soon 🙇😢"

After eating, her mom went to take shower and her father went to sleep while she went to the kitchen to wash the plates 👏.

When lulu and her mother returned to the sitting room, I was not there 🏃‍♂️.

They checked all over the house and did not find me 😔.

As they were wondering what happened to me, I walked back into the house, wet and soaked with a polythene bag 😨.

Lulu's mother: Where were you and why are you so wet?😏

Me: I went home to get my pajamas for sleeping 😎😎

Because she's pregnant doesn't mean she had s*x

Stop judging people 😒

Dear men,

1- Having many girlfriends does not make you a man. It only makes you a womanizer and a cheat and a boy.

2- A real man has only one woman in his life.

3- For the fact that you are good in bed does not make you a man. A real man is the man who does not run away from his responsibility but faces it squarely.

4- You don't need to sag your trousers and walk round the street before girls will love you, Infact it is only small boys that sag trousers and it is premature little girls that fall in love with boys who sag trousers.

5- Don't use and dump ladies. Remember the law of karma. Whatever you do, you will receive the reward. Karma has no menu you are served what you deserve.

6- If you can not make her your wife, don't make her a mother.

7- Do not obey your er****on at all times. Most of the times our er****ons mislead us to the wrong direction. Control your er****on. Don't let your er****on control you.

8- It is not everything you see under skirt that you should hustle to eat, some skirts contain snakes that will bite you. Control your s*x urge. Self control and abstinence pays a lot.

9- Do not date a lady because she has s*xy curves, b***s and shapes. Those things are just packaging; and packaging can be very deceptive.

10- Respect any lady that loves you.

11- Do not beat any woman, even if she is your wife.

12- Real men don't gossip.

13- Spend more time to hustle for money. Real and wise men use their time to think and plan on how to be financially successful. Foolish men use their time to think and plan on how to sleep with many girls.

14- The world only celebrates successful men. Nobody will celebrate you for having many girlfriends. Therefore what is the benefit? Waste of energy and waste of protein.

To see chelsea
Press 10

Unashangaa mosquito imeingia aje kwa laptop kumbe uliacha windows open

WIFE APPLICATION FOR 2023

Full names:__________________________
Surname:___________________________
ID No:______________________________
Age:_______________________________
Residential Address:___________________
___________________
___________________
Drivers License:______________________
Criminal Record:______________________
Monthly Salary:______________________
Profession:__________________________
Height:_____________________________
Complexion:_________________________
Favorite Bible verse:___________________

In 800Words explain why do you want to be my wife_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

DECLARATION:

I________________ hereby swear that I'll never cheat on you. I'll remain loyal,respectful, caring and honest to you till Death Do Us Apart. I also promise to unfriend my male bestie, I'll never talk to my male friends/colleagues except for work issue.

Sworn on_______day of_____2023

Applicant Signature:___________________
Parents Signatures:____________________
____________________
Witness Signature 1:___________________
Witness Signature 2:___________________
Pastor Signature: _____________________
My mother's Signature:___________________

APPLICATION FORM MUST BE ACCOMPANIED BY AFFIDAVIT AND ksh. 1,250,000 JOINING FEE MUST BE ATTACHED
CLOSING DATE: 7th Feb 2023. Plus recommendation letter of your area chief, onge mila

Kuna mtoto amenichuna tukiwa kwa gari😭😭 mama yake akasmile saa hii nangoja tufike kwa bumb nikapige hedi moja kalie kalale 😟😟

20_THINGS_THAT_GOD_HATES❌😠

1. Worldly hair cut = leviticus 19 vs 27
2. Tattoo. = Leviticus 19 vs28
3. Earrings & chains = Isaiah 3 vs 16-26
4. Changing the hair color =Roman 1:25-26
5. Lipstick & painting of face = Jeremiah 4:30
6. Sagging. = Zephaniah 1:8
7. Attachment. = 1st Peter 3:3
8. Man keeping long hair = 1st Corinthians 11:14
9. Woman not covering their hair In the presence of thy Lord = 1st Corinthians 11:1-13
10. Women wearing trousers = Deuteronomy 22: 5
11. Perfume. = Exodus 30:37-38
12. Friendship with world = James 4:4
13. Worldly . music. = Amos 5:25
14. Covering sin. = Proverbs 28:13
15. Stealing. = Proverbs 28:13
16. False witness. = Exodus 20:15
17. Strong(alcoholic) drink/drunkard = proverbs 20:1/31:6
18. Love of the world = 1st John 2:15
19. Adultery. = Matthew 5:27-30
20. Lust = proverbs 6:25

May God forgive us...