Prof. Henry Francis B. Espiritu

Tonight, I faced a heart-wrenching realization: the almost two months of semestral break have slipped away from me so silently, so unnoticed, that I can hardly believe it. Time, that ever-elusive thief, has stolen these days from my grasp. It feels as though the months have rushed past me like a fleeting shadow, leaving me stranded in a sea of anxiety and sorrow. The comforting respite of the semestral break from UP Cebu has vanished, and now I am confronted with the looming storm of academic duties and responsibilities, crashing over me like a relentless tidal wave. Just the thought of facing this new semester fills me with a deep, overwhelming angst.

Clutching a profound booklet by the modern Indian philosopher and mystic Jiddu Krishnamurti, I find myself desperately seeking solace. The booklet is entitled “The Limit of Time and the Fear of Life’s Finiteness,” and its words feel both like a balm and a burden. In it, Krishnamurti echoes the ancient wisdom of Siddhartha Gautama Buddha: “Be a refuge to yourself, rely on yourself, for others have their own lives too, and they cannot take care of yours.” (page 90).

The above words seem to pierce through the haze of my emotions, revealing a painful truth that only we can ever truly care for our very own self and for our very own concerns. Krishnamurti further speaks to us on the challenge of self-reliance: “In yourself lies the world and if you know how to look, learn, and reflect, then the door to Being is there and the key to Life is in your hands, and not in anybody else’s. Nobody in heaven or on earth, or even in hell can give you the keys to the door of Life except yourself. You have the key, the lock and the door to your life: it is all up to you! You can close yourself or open up yourself to the invitation of Life. It is really all up to you…” (page 98).

Reading these lines, I am overwhelmed by a profound sense of loneliness. I realize, with a deep ache in my heart, that the search for meaning in my life is solely my own burden to bear. I cannot look up to nor depend on anyone—be he or she a guru, a saint, a philosopher, a prophet, an external deity, or even the grand structures of society—to provide me with answers or solace in life. The responsibility of finding my own refuge and meaning falls squarely on my shoulders.

My life holds both the potential for transcendent beauty and the chains that keep me bound to life's pettiness and despair. The realization that no one but myself can unlock this door is both a heavy weight and a bitter comfort to me. As the Buddha poignantly challenged us, “Not even a god can conquer a person who has already conquered himself.” (page 91). This challenge is indeed both sobering and dreadful that stings deeply and creates a profound existential angst deep within my innermost being.

As I brace myself for the inevitable grind of academic work for this new semester—preparing for my day-to-day classes, grading papers, listening to oral exams, reading my students' outputs, addressing student concerns, and patiently listening to students during consultation hours—I feel a wave of sadness washing over me.

Despite the relentless pressures and the weariness that clings to my spirit, I remind myself, almost through tears, that there is still a glimmer of hope in Life; and that this semester will be fine, and everything in this semester will work out fine. I cling to this fragile affirmation from the depths of my heart: it is still a Good Life, it is still a Beautiful Life... “TOWARDS THE GOOD LIFE! ON TO THE GOOD LIFE!”
(Written by Prof. Henry Francis B. Espiritu on August 14, 2024 at 6:41 PM.)

HONORING THE MEMORY OF MY EVER-DEAREST YOUNGEST BROTHER CLINT ON THE 40TH DAY OF HIS PASSING-ON TO ETERNITY BY DISTRIBUTING HEALTHY VEGETARIAN LUNCH PACKS AND BOTTLES OF JUICE TO THE 120 CHILDREN AT THE FRANCISCAN OUTREACH COMMUNITY CENTER IN SITIO BAGONG SILANGAN, BRGY. MACTAN, LAPU-LAPU CITY (7 August 2024 Afternoon)

Last 7 August 2024 was the 40th day of my late dearest youngest brother Clint's passing-on to Eternity; which is the culmination of the traditional period or duration of mourning in our Leyteno culture. Last 7 August 2024 at 3 PM, together with the Franciscan priests, brothers, and nuns from Southeast Asia, the Philippines, and Oceania, I helped and collaborated in the feeding of 120 children with nutritious vegetarian food at the community outreach center of the Franciscan Sisters of the Immaculate Conception (SFIC) at Sitio Bagong Silangan, Barangay Mactan, Lapu-Lapu City just at the back of St. Joseph School of Mactan, a school which is ran by the SFIC Franciscan sisters.

My feeding of the 120 children from the community outreach center gave me a bittersweet feeling that I was able to honor the 40th day of my late ever-dearest youngest brother Clint's passing-on to Eternity by being with my Franciscan clergy friends from Southeast Asia, the Philippines, and Oceania as we showed our care, concern, empathy, and solidarity with the 120 children at the Franciscan community outreach center in Sitio Bagong Silangan, Barangay Mactan, Lapu-Lapu City by our preparing and sharing of simple yet healthy vegetarian lunch packs and juice to them. Inside the lunch pack is contained vegetarian bam-i noodles, sunny-side up vegetarian egg made of soya, and organic rice. We also gave 120 bottles of fruit juice and 120 portable tumblers to the children.

Before the feeding program, the children from the community outreach center gave their dances. Then someone from the parents of the children requested that I as a guest and at least one Franciscan sister or clergy should also give a dance offering. Some minutes before that, I got to know Sr. Julienne Conrada, SFIC there at the community center and she told me that she was from Llorente, Eastern Samar. Sr. Julienne is an 85-year old Franciscan nun who shared to me about her affection for Samar-Leyte culture and her love of the Kuratsa dance of her youth. Therefore, it was Sr. Julienne, SFIC who I requested to partner with me in dancing the Kuratsa dance, specifically the style that is popular in Samar, which is known as "Kuratsa Mayor" or "Kuratsa Amenudo". The only difficulty I had with our Kuratsa dance there at the Franciscan community outreach center was the very cramped space for dancing which made it hard for Sr. Julienne and I to execute the Kuratsa steps and the Kuratsa dance foot movements...

My collaboration with the Franciscan clergies and nuns in the feeding of the 120 children at the Franciscan community outreach center in Lapu-Lapu City and my dancing of the Kuratsa Samarnon during the 40th day of my ever-dearest brother Clint's passing-on to Eternity (the 40th day being the culmination of the traditional period of mourning in Leyte-Samar culture) reminded me of this beautiful passage from the Psalms of David that says: "Jehovah has turned my mourning into dancing again. Jehovah has lifted my sorrows. And I cannot stay silent; for I must sing for Jehovah's joy has come" (Psalm 30:11-12 [Old Mennonite Bible Translation]). Although, I am still going to wear my grieving clothes of black color until the 100th day of my ever-dearest brother Clint's passing (until 8 October 2024), yet the All-Merciful God has already returned to me the feeling of joy after the most overwhelming and darkest grief that I have experienced upon my brother's passing and the All-Merciful God has already given me the acceptance of my ever-dearest youngest brother Clint's passing-on to Life Eternal...

I must sincerely mention that I am indeed truly grateful to my ever-dearest mentor Professor Emeritus Felisa Uy Etemadi for freely lending me her van and for allowing her trusted family driver Pat to bring the lunch packs and juice to the 120 children at Sitio Bagong Silangan, Barangay Mactan, Lapu-Lapu City. This feeding program is likewise dedicated in honor of the blessed memory of UP Prof. Emeritus Felisa Uy Etemadi’s saintly and godly husband, the late and the dearly missed Sir Alireza Etemadi Sahib (may our Only Best Beloved illumine Sir Ali's grave and elevate his heavenly station.). My deep gratitude likewise goes to Pat for bringing me and the lunch packs as well as the bottles of juice for the 120 children to the community outreach center and for bringing me back to my home in Cebu City after the feeding program...

Together with this my post tonight, I included photos of my feeding program to the 120 children at the Franciscan community outreach center in Sitio Bagong Silangan, Barangay Mactan, Lapu-Lapu City last 7 August, 2024. I hope that the readers of this post will be edified in seeing the photos and will themselves be encouraged to likewise help those who are in need.
(Written by Prof. Henry Francis B. Espiritu on August 12, 2024 at 9:32 PM.)

Living an unexamined life is so easy since it it is an inauthentic existence in conformity to the dictates of the crowd. Such a human life, if one can call it as such, is simply being herded and influenced by the prevailing notions and opinions of the mob. Indeed, it is very simple to merely accept the beliefs that others have imposed upon us; it is uncomplicated to stick to the safe and the familiar, and to ignore and set aside anything that would shake our certainty.

However, can you confront the heart-wrenching truth? Can you face the truth that hurts? Can you accept the inconvenient truth? Can you face the pain of realizing that you’ve been living a deception, living a lie, living an inauthentic life, living a life that is not coming from the exercise of your very own freedom but a borrowed life that comes from the dictates of and impositions by others? Can you find the strength, the brave daring, the courageous risking to change your inauthentic life's trajectory and not just merely remain in the path of least resistance?

Living a life of a lie can only offer temporary refuge; however the deep, aching yearning for truth, for a genuine life, and for a true sense of being, and for an authentic existence will persist deep within our innermost soul, like a raw, unhealed wound crying out for our comfort and for our attention. It is fine to release life's lies that we once held onto with such desperate protection. It is okay to acknowledge that those inauthentic views of ourselves which we once despairingly clung to are already passe' and are therefore no longer needed in our lives.

Genuine life and authentic living begin when we understand that it is only we who can hold the key to our very own self-liberation, self-redemption, and self-enlightenment. We are our own greatest obstacles, and yet we are our own break-throughs. We are our very own bitter enemies, and yet we are also our very own well-wishers. We are our very own captors, and also our very own liberators. It is therefore high time now to strip away our pretenses, our hypocrisies, our false masks, and allow ourselves to simply be our very own true selves, with the raw openness, vulnerability, honesty, and woundedness that genuine life and authentic human existence really entail. So how about it?... Something to reflect upon as we close our week tonight and start a new one tomorrow.
(Written by Prof. Henry Francis B. Espiritu on August 10, 2024 at 9:44 PM.)

(Photo Credit: Accompanying photo courtesy of Vector Stock Website.)

HAPPY THIRTEENTH (13TH) ANNIVERSARY OF MY FACEBOOK PAGE! MY MOST PROFOUND AND SINCERE GRATITUDE FOR YOUR SUPPORT ALL THROUGHOUT THESE THIRTEEN YEARS. THANK YOU VERY MUCH!
I have been so preoccupied these past few days that I was not able to realize and notice that my page “Prof. Henry Francis B. Espiritu” has already reached its 13th Anniversary last 4th of August 2024; that was two days ago. I would like to extend my most sincere and profound thanks to all my readers, likers, followers, commenters, and guests/visitors of this my page for your support all throughout these 13 years…

I still vividly remember that night, thirteen (13) years ago in the month of August (4 August 2011) when I frantically texted my former student Edwin Estrera (one of those ever-dearest students of mine from the Political Science graduation batch of 2010 who made this page, and who I consider to be my dearest son, and is now an assistant professor at UP Cebu High School) to delete the Page since personally, I did not find it flattering nor amusing to see that they made a page for me without my prior consent. Edwin humbly yet firmly requested me to reconsider my decision of deleting the Page since there were already more than 300 students who “liked” the Page that very night they made it. He then suggested that I can use my page as an avenue to share and broadcast my social and political advocacies, my philosophical, spiritual, ethical, and academic views, as well as a venue for me to connect with my previous students and friends who “liked” and "followed" my Page. So I reluctantly agreed to Edwin’s suggestion not to delete the Page they made for me. And the rest is Timeline History…

Looking back, thirteen years ago, I cannot imagine my life now without this page. It has now become the setting and venue for me to register my views, critiques, perspectives, positions, my feelings about things/events, my standpoints, and my opinions on the burning issues of the day. Now, this my page has practically become an extension of my teaching vocation outside the class. Above all, it has now become my bridge to my former and present students as well as a locus for my communicating with friends and well-wishers, both old and new; not just here in the Philippines, but friends and well-wishers from other distant oceans and foreign shores—which I only knew and got-in-touch with through the agency of this my page.

Therefore, I most specially thank my former students of UP Cebu Political Science Graduation Batch of 2010 for their “audacity” in making a page for me, initially without my prior consent. My dearest students from the Political Science Graduation Batch of 2010, I cannot exhaust my most profound and sincere "Thank you" for giving me this nice and enjoyable opportunity to somehow serve humanity in my very own little way, through the vehicle of this my page. Thank you very much from the bottom of my heart…

When this Page was made by my Political Science students (Graduation Batch of 2010) until this very night, I am amazed at the gradual yet steady growth of “likes” to this Page. I could not believe my eyes when I noted that as per tonight, this my Page is now liked by 28,972 people and followed by 28,911 people, not just here in the Philippines but by diverse peoples around the world. I based this information on the Notification and Insights provided weekly by Facebook Statistics and Insights Column for Page Admins.

To date, these are the countries from where the "likes" and "follows" come from; arranged in order, starting from the countries having the highest numbers of "likes/follows": Philippines, India, Bhutan, Turkey, United States of America (USA), Saudi Arabia, United Arab Emirates (UAE), Hong Kong, Singapore, Canada, Australia, Brunei, Qatar, United Kingdom (UK), Algeria, Germany, Kuwait, Japan, Indonesia, Taiwan, Pakistan, Thailand, Mongolia, Iran, Nigeria, Malaysia, Italy, Iraq, Sweden, New Zealand, Brazil, Mexico, Vietnam, South Korea, Kazakhstan, Netherlands, Nepal, Fiji, Morocco, Oman, Spain, Mauritius, Denmark, Israel, Egypt, Bangladesh, Switzerland, Lebanon, Bulgaria, Angola, Bolivia, Macau, Tanzania, Jordan, Sri Lanka, Cyprus, Norway, Ghana, Niger, South Africa, Barbados, Serbia, Cambodia, Iceland, Romania, Russia, Belgium, Tajikistan, France, Argentina, Comoros, Finland, Kyrgyzstan, Laos, Uzbekistan, Myanmar, Tunisia, Ecuador, Trinidad-Tobago, Ukraine, Iceland, Denmark, Turkmenistan, Georgia, Latvia, Mozambique, Haiti, Libya, Maldives, Liberia, Costa Rica, Panama, and Syria.

I am very much humbled and grateful for the ever-growing number of people who continue to "like" and "follow" my page all these thirteen (13) years, given the fact that there were also some who had “unliked” and "unfollowed" my Page through the years of its existence. But such is Life—you win some and you also lose some. I am truly grateful to all of you: readers, followers, subscribers, commenters, "likers", viewers, and guests of my Page who continue to like and follow this Page as well as its regular posts up until now. I further hope that there will be more who will like, follow or subscribe to my page. All I can sincerely say is "Thank you very much" to those readers who continually like, follow, comment, share and subscribe to my posts.

Thank you very much from the bottom of my heart”. As of tonight this my page has already garnered 28,972 likes and 28,911 followers all throughout these thirteen (13) years of my page’s existence. I am deeply grateful to you all for making this my page part of your life…

Once again, my most sincere thanks to all of you, faithful “likers”, "followers", subscribers, readers, viewers, and visitors to this my page. I truly am very grateful and I really appreciate your support, through your likes, shares, PM messages, chats, feedback, comments, and reactions both positive and negative; a very big THANK YOU to all of you. Here’s hoping that the best is yet to come for this my page, and further hoping that I could somehow provide you good enough reasons for you to come back to my page time and again. I am truly humbled and sincerely thankful to one and all. God bless us real good!
(Written by Prof. Henry Francis B. Espiritu on August 6, 2024 at 8:00 PM.)

(Credit: Accompanying photo courtesy of Vecteezy Website.)

“SANA OL”… When you are in Turkey, chances are, you can often hear this phrase "SANA OL… GIBI OL". This beautiful Turkish phrase literally means "Be you... just you". This phrase can also mean “as you please” or “just as you are”. “Sana ol… gibi ol”. “Be you… just be you!”. For me this is the best maxim of authenticity: to be true, to be yourself, and not to be another. Whatever our real face is, we show it and be true to who we are. “Sana ol… gibi ol”. Be you... just you! There should be no apologies for being you, for being unapologetically "you" since it is so very tiresome to put on masks all throughout life. It is wearisome to be fake and to be someone other than who you truly are…

I find the Turkish phrase “sana ol” very interesting because three or four years ago, there was this popular Taglish idiomatic expression “SANA ALL". But there is a very stark difference between the Turkish “sana ol” (be you) and the Taglish “sana all”. Our "sana all" is a well-wishing. It is to wish that everyone will be the same, will be like or similar in circumstances, a well-wishing that all will achieve the same result or similar end and goal. Candidly, our "sana all" means "unta tanan" in Cebuano or “sana lahat" in Tagalog. But the Turkish "sana ol" means just the very opposite. It means "be you" no matter what it takes, even if you have to go alone; just be you even if no one will follow you, just be you even if others will see you as weird or peculiar. It is in this context that I really love this Turkish maxim: “Sana ol… gibi ol”...

“SANA OL… GIBI OL”. “BE YOU… JUST BE YOU!”. To struggle to become who you are not, is tantamount to existential su***de. All efforts to imitate others and abandon who you truly are, is the highest form of neurosis: in fact it is the ultimate existential inauthenticity and the ultimate fakery one can ever commit in one's short life. To desire that you become who you are not, is the most serious form of idiocy and causes one to be the most unhappy and the most discontented person in this world. Living our life by envying others, coveting others and obsessively comparing ones' achievement with others is like living in the deepest and darkest realms of hell.

Let us neither envy others nor covet their achievements for these would be the cause of our frustrations and an utter disrespect of our own existence as a unique and unrepeatable person. Let us chase our own dreams and not borrow the dreams of others! Let us not be a poor imitator of another, instead let us be the best versions of ourselves. Competition need not be between us and others. Competition must be confined to ourselves only: that is whether we have produced the better version of ourselves today than yesterday. I believe this is the only way to live a life of contentment, peace and happiness.

“You are you; therefore be you!”; so said the existentialist philosopher and theologian, Soren Kierkegaard. We are who we are. But the saddest thing in our existence is that we want to become who we are not. We want to become those people we idealize thus resulting to our own discontent, neurosis, angst, and madness. Envy others and desire that you be like them and then you go round and round in aimless circle of obsessing and wanting that will be unending and futile! Let us come to truly realize this simple and crystal-clear truth: YOU ARE YOU AND YOU CANNOT BE ANOTHER!

God wants you to be you and not to simply mimic others! That is why God has created you, otherwise God would have not created you as YOU. Our real achievement in life is when we become the best versions of our own selves at the end of this all too short ephemeral and temporary life. God does not want us be the best copy-cat of our our own heroes and of our envied ideal persons. We can never be like them no matter how we try; we can only be ourselves: the best version of our own selves! God has not created another to be on this earth in place of you—you are unique, the unrepeatable, irreducible, irreplaceable, the incommensurable, the one and only YOU: in our beautiful Tagalog saying: “ANG NAG-IISANG IKAW AY IKAW AT IKAW LAMANG!”.

Please, let us together reflect and survey our cosmos: only we humans have this tendency to be idiotic, to be neurotic, to become existentially crazy and mad because it is only we humans who torture ourselves and force ourselves to enter into this tortuous, most painful, and very excruciating mold of becoming someone we are not! Animals are not neurotic, they just let themselves be. Plants cannot become mad or crazy because they are contented of who and what they are. They are not trying to become somebody else they are not. They are simply enjoying whatever they are. They just let themselves be, with no hangups of comparing themselves with others and with no regrets of who and what they are. So let us learn to accept ourselves for this is the ultimate key to our existential freedom and ultimate release from unnecessary and unreal expectations.

If we can truly accept ourselves: our beauty, our warts, our virtues, our hangups, and all of who and what we are, then we have learned the greatest virtues we can ever learn from Life: Contentment and Gratefulness to Existence for creating us just as we are. So let us just be ourselves. There is really no need to pull our self up and bring others down. There is really nothing to covet or envy from others because we cannot be "the other", we can only be ourselves, and hence competition against another must not be the issue; but the real challenge in Life is to make ourselves the best version of our true selves and not to allow ourselves to be poor imitators of other's life and accomplishments.

There is really no need to have another face, there is really no need to put one's best foot forward so as to gain nice impression from others, there is really no need to copy-cat others since by doing so we cancel-out and invalidate our very own true selves in the process of our coveting and envying others... Simply be as you are, and in deep acceptance of it, a deep flowering and fruition of your true self will happen and you will go on becoming more and more yourself, becoming more and more a unique individual rather than being part of an herded crowd or being an unthinking cog of today's extractive capitalism and greedy consumerism of wanting and obsessing to be someone you are not...

Once we drop the idea of becoming somebody who is not us, then there is peace in our self and with others, there is deep serenity: there is true and abiding JOY! Suddenly all tensions brought by mad, neurotic, and covetous comparison and envying of others disappear. When you cease to envy and stop comparing yourself with others and their achievements, then you have finally arrived, the most beautiful you, is happening right now at this very moment. And there is really nothing else to do in our all too short life but to accept, love, cherish, celebrate, and enjoy WHO WE TRULY ARE! So how about it?... “SANA OL… GIBI OL!”. “BE YOU… JUST BE YOU!”.
(Note: Written by Prof. Henry Francis B. Espiritu on August 4, 2024 at 8:25 PM. His post tonight is largely an enlargement and adaptation of his previous essay posted in his page on September 28, 2019 and May 14, 2020 respectively.)

(Credit: Accompanying photo courtesy of Red Bubble Website)