Chhahari Counseling, PLLC

Chhahari Counseling, PLLC updated their address.

Head on over to The Therapist Group’s blog I helped write to learn about the impact of IPV on children, and a few ideas on how to support kiddos witnessing and/or directly experiencing abuse.

The Effects of Intimate Partner Violence on Children How do we navigate different beliefs, values and opinions with compassion and respect for our significant others, parents, siblings or close friends?

As this Valentine’s Day comes to a close, here’s a little something on a few ways to boost your happiness chemicals. Go love on yourself; you deserve to! ❤️❤️

Do y'all still remember my post from October 2020 about being a busy-bee🐝? I finally present to you the second part in the series!
May be I will get to the next part a little sooner 😅. Here's to 🤞🏽🤞🏽hoping!

Are You a Busy Bee? Part 2 PC: Robert Collins If you are a busy bee, where does this come from? Perfectionism – What are the fears and painful past experiences that drive you toward perfectionism? While wanting to crea…

This whole post is amazing! Please read.

One way I know that I have made progress in my healing is that I have given my children permission to advocate for themselves when they are on the receiving end of my wound reactions. ⁣⁣
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Last night, my daughter (almost 8), had some very big & instantaneous feelings when I asked her to turn off the TV and do her nightly 20 min of reading. I was so thrown off by her reaction to what I considered a gentle reasonable request that I went into defense/offense mode (I was tired/ hungry/ low brain prone) and ended up calling her DRAMATIC and threatening her with telling her teacher. What??? Yes, I threatened to tattle. 🙈 The helplessness and confusion I was experiencing was palpable. Not my best moment. ⁣⁣
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“Mom! You’re being violent with your words! You’re not being a safe space for my feelings!” ⁣⁣
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She was right. I WAS being violent with my words. I was NOT being a safe space. Though it’s not her responsibility to create the conditions for my self-reflection, this helped me to snap out of the spiral I was going down.⁣⁣
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I cannot imagine what would’ve happened to me (yes I can but don’t want to) if I had said those things to my mom as a child. I was fearful. ⁣⁣
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But this child— she is fearless. And isn’t that the child I set out to raise? A child who is unafraid to self-advocate, knows her worth, and can create boundaries QUICK when something doesn’t feel good in her body about the way she’s being treated.⁣⁣
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Let me be clear. This was not “talking back”, this was not “giving me attitude”. This was a POSITIVE. I didn’t realize that right away. I had to consciously grow that little light of truth that cracked open in me when she said that. ⁣⁣
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I told her she was right but that I needed space. I told her I was in my low brain and needed to come back up before we could continue. I drank water. I sat on the floor. I paid attention to my breath & to my other two kids.⁣⁣
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I was able to ground. Twenty minutes later, we were able to repair. I apologized for my part. She, on her own accord, apologized too for “freaking out”. I thanked her for standing up for herself. We worked on solutions for next time. This is the work. Our work. 🌻

Things I'm thinking about on MLK Jr. Day...

Happy MLK Jr. Day! Here we are again! It’s Martin Luther King Jr. Day, and the eve of inauguration day in the U.S. I don’t want to exploit the importance of MLK Jr., his words, and his work, but I sure am…

We talk a lot about our relational love, but how do you express love to yourself ?🥰 And how often?

What have you observed about the connection between intimate partner violence and patriarchy? Add your examples below.

What parts of you and your life from
2020 do you want to bring with you this year? In what ways will they serve you?

Media Text: Social justice; Befriending my inner-self; Creativity; Hope; Less shopping, more resting; Community mindedness

Could your new year be about looking inward as much as it is about looking outward?
Could your new year be about manageable steps rather than high jumps that leave you breathless and depleted?
Could your new year be about the feelings, themes, and sensations you want rather than just actions or resolutions?

Media Text: May the new year find you reaching high, turning inward, rooting down, and extending outward. May your growth be in all directions.

Head on over to The Therapist Group to read a blog I helped write about Intimate Partner Violence! Here I cover what IPV is, how to recognize it, some safety planning, and resources in our community for further support.

Shining a light on Intimate Partner Violence We offer marriage counseling, family therapy, addiction counseling, grief counseling, and stress management in the Denver area.

A very happy Tihar (Deepawali) to all those who celebrate this beautiful festival of light!
May your year be filled with light, heart-felt connections despite the distance, and joy.
If you are celebrating this festival alone, I hope you are creating rituals that bring you warmth and comfort.

❤️

How it Feels to Move Up & Out of Trauma. They say time heals all wounds. I’m not sure I agree.

Election Day Self-Care

A Very Happy Dashain to all those who celebrate this joyous festival!
It's a tough year for this celebration - fewer hands to bless us, fewer games and dances, even fewer resources for many than usual, and perhaps an increased sense of isolation in addition to the usual sense of separation if you are a part of the Nepali or Bhutani diaspora. If you are in a region affected by climate change like us here in Colorado or by an oppressive government like in the US at this time, this festival may be especially painful right now.
Sending you all a lot of love and warmth this season. I hope that even if the incredible social aspect of this festival is absent right now, a sense of love and belonging, of playfulness, and of fighting for the good of our communities are present and palpable.

Are you a Busy Bee? Part 1 PC: Ante Hamersmit If you describe yourself as a busy bee or a workaholic, if you work long hours or everyday of the week, is it because of your financial circumstance and responsibilities? Is it b…

Here’s a Great Secret About Psychotherapy PC: Markus Spiske If you are worried about all the talking and listening you will have to do in therapy, here’s a good news for you – that is not the primary focus in all therapeutic mo…

Yet another way to find me!

Shely Basnet, LCSW, LAC Painful and distressing experiences can scar us psychologically, emotionally, physically, and spiritually, and it can leave us feeling alone in our experiences. I therefore strive to provide a safe, warm, and compassionate environment as we work together on your healing...

Conversation on the Pandemic: Part 2 PC: Thomas de LUZE This pandemic may come with many tough experiences and feelings, such as anxiety, a sense of sadness, fatigue, overwhelm, a sense of doom, feeling of isolation, etc. On top of al…

Always ask this question.

The Most Important Question Questions to ask a therapist/counselor.

For those familiar the field of psychotherapy to any degree, searching for a therapist may not feel like a big obstacle. But for many of us for whom this is a new or unfamiliar concept, it can be a daunting process simply because we don't know what to expect. This was true for me when I first heard about psychologists and therapy and decided to look for someone to work with.

How to Search for a Therapist How to find a therapist.

What misconceptions are missing from the list and what have you learned about them?

Common Misconceptions About Therapy Misconceptions about therapy.

A quick post on why therapy may be beneficial and why people choose to be in therapy.

Why Therapy? As I get older, I have come to realize that more and more people from my generation are either considering therapy or are already in therapy. Curiosity and interest in therapy continues to increase…

Drive safe people, expect snow-packed and icy roads towards sunset

What to expect from the Feb. 3-4 Colorado snowstorm While much of northeastern Colorado woke up to a glaze of ice and we’ve seen intermittent snow through the morning, the heaviest snow is still to come on Monday afternoon.

Chhahari Counseling, PLLC updated their business hours.

“The opposite of addiction is not sobriety. The opposite of addiction is connection.” - Johann Hari

what have your observations been about how marginalization and oppression factor into loss of connection? how does having an unsafe, inconsistent, or unhealthy relationship pattern with caregivers as a child factor into addiction related disorders? please feel free to drop your thoughts down below.

How isolation fuels opioid addiction What do Tourette syndrome, he**in addiction and social media obsession all have in common? They converge in an area of the brain called the striatum, says neuroscientist Rachel Wurzman -- and this critical discovery could reshape our understanding of the opioid crisis. Sharing insights from her rese...

wishing you a very happy Kwanza, Hanukkah, and Christmas...and a very good night! 110 ft. digital 🎄⤵️

trauma brings on a sense of loss. how do you then mourn the internal and external losses?
how do you create space for the complicated web of having survived something painful with something(s)/people you have had to move forward without?
have you included yourself in your rituals of moving forward? the parts of you that haven’t yet recovered, the parts of you that have changed and adapted, the parts of you with whom you are unfamiliar, the parts of you that feel emptied out...all of it, every bit of it.