thats.so.hazel

I knew that I would get back to writing when something ignited the urge to do it... my new blog post "Suicidal" is up! Check it out at thatssohazel.com or click on the link in bio. ​​​​​​​​
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***de ***dehelp ***deprevention

A quote from my blog post "Suicidal". Check it out at thatssohazel.com or click on the link in profile. ​​​​​​​​
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***de ***deprevention ***deunderstanding

I won't know until I try.
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Why does it take courage to be the best version of yourself? ​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​
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As someone who struggles with mental health, I do not take this lightly. It's hard to be your best self when there is this annoying (we'll call it) "depression parrot" that sits on your shoulder. ​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​
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It just lives there. Sometimes it's quiet and you can go about your day without the annoying demands and sounds that come from it. But other days, it won't shut up and it makes it very hard to focus, to live. ​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​
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But you have to start taking charge and doing the things that you know help you. Why is it hard? Because failure is hard. It's hard to admit, and it's hard to face. But failure is just an opportunity to learn; to grow. Take it. ​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​
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Have the courage to tell yourself that it doesn't matter how many times you fall back into a low, you will keep fighting. You'll keep doing what you need to do to manage. Take your meds, go to therapy, workout, journal. ​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​
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It won't always be easy or smooth, but don't stop. Eventually, your mind will shift, and though the depression may still be there, it won't have control anymore. ​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​
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You can do this. ​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​
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Why does it take courage to be the best version of yourself? ​​​​​​​​
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As someone who struggles with mental health, I do not take this lightly. It's hard to be your best self when there is this annoying (we'll call it) "depression parrot" that sits on your shoulder. ​​​​​​​​
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It just lives there. Sometimes it's quiet and you can go about your day without the annoying demands and sounds that come from it. But other days, it won't shut up and it makes it very hard to focus, to live. ​​​​​​​​
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But you have to start taking charge and doing the things that you know help you. Why is it hard? Because failure is hard. It's hard to admit, and it's hard to face. But failure is just an opportunity to learn; to grow. Take it. ​​​​​​​​
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Have the courage to tell yourself that it doesn't matter how many times you fall back into a low, you will keep fighting. You'll keep doing what you need to do to manage. Take your meds, go to therapy, workout, journal. ​​​​​​​​
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It won't always be easy or smooth, but don't stop. Eventually, your mind will shift, and though the depression may still be there, it won't have control anymore. ​​​​​​​​
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You can do this. ​​​​​​​​
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It might seem obvious, but vacations are good for the mind, body, and soul! I don't mean taking a couple of days off from work and being home. I mean, going somewhere, experiencing something away from the usual.
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If your finances don't call for leaving your state, take a staycation. Go to a hotel or resort in a different city, but take your family away and experience something new.
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Read my post to see why.
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The first time I sat Gabi down to have this conversation, she was eight. And you know what; that kid has been one of the absolute most supportive and most loving when I need it most.
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Not in a "she is taking care of me" way, but she checks in on me. She asks me how I'm feeling, or if I need something; especially when she can tell that maybe I'm a little off.
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We have an incredibly close relationship and because we are open, I can rest in knowing that she isn't going to feel "damaged or traumatized" over my depression.
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She knows how to cope, and she knows how to be there for me. She also knows how to speak up when she is in need of something from me, or if she can tell I’m off.
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Mindset is everything. It is really easy for me to sit and dwell on the things that I struggle with. Depression has this crazy control over me sometimes, and I am sick and tired of it. ​​​​​​​​
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Can I change the fact that depression is part of my life? No. Is it an illness that needs treatment, probably for the rest of my life; yes. ​​​​​​​​
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But I have to change the way I view that; otherwise I am going to live my life dwelling on the fact that I hate that I have depression. I don't want to live that way. ​​​​​​​​
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So I have to change my mindset. I can choose to dwell, and wait for the next low, or I can take on each day with an attitude that says, "I'm still me; I'm going to act like me today, and I'm going to show up." ​​​​​​​​
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It will be hard some days, but the first step is trying. Here’s to changing the things I CAN; and CHOOSING to switch my mindset. 🥂​​​​​​​​
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Depression doesn't have to take your confidence. In fact, don't let it! Here are some tips that work for me.
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I struggle the most when I am not "dumping" my thoughts somehow. There is so much in my head all of the time; usually things that are stressful. Lists of tasks that need to be done; usually not things that help me to slow down. ​​​​​​​​
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Journaling is a way to help me do that; slow down. Sometimes I don't know what to write down because there is so much, so I turn to lists of journal prompts that others have created. ​​​​​​​​
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This is the one I'm working on currently, so I thought I'd share it with you. Use it to help you refocus. It's a great way to start your day. ​​​​​​​​
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Do you remember the you before kids? The you who felt full of energy; who enjoyed life’s freedoms. The freedoms that you didn’t realize you would miss someday. Like, taking a shower whenever you wanted to. Or, going p*e; alone.
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Being a Mom is a lot of work, and it also takes a little piece of who we are. But it doesn’t have to. If we can find balance; a way to still be the women we were before motherhood.
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It doesn’t mean that we don’t love our kids and it doesn’t make us a lesser version of a mother because we want to continue to also be the woman; not just the Mom.
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We need that woman. We need to love her, and care for her. That means that we need to find a way to make time for her.
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So do it. Find a way. And you know what; it’ll make you an even better Mama too. 🤍
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Happiness is not a choice. I HATE that saying. Because it isn't true. ​​​​​​​​
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We don't all live in the same circumstances. We don't know what others may be going through and we most certainly shouldn't make others feel like if they're not happy, it's their own fault. ​​​​​​​​
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But... happiness can be CREATED. It can be worked toward. It can be a moment; and even a moment of happiness is worth having. ​​​​​​​​
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Even in a state of depression, we can practice finding little nuggets of things that bring us joy. So today, I encourage you to do that. ​​​​​​​​
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Even if you're really struggling to fight off the demons. Even if they're only thoughts of the things that you know bring you joy, even if you can't feel it right now.​​​​​​​​
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Allow yourself to go there. Your depression doesn't define you and it most certainly isn't stronger than you are. Even if it feels like it is somedays. ​​​​​​​​
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YOU are the little light of happiness. Ignite it. ​​​​​​​​
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Just a reminder to check-in with yourself.
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I've been thinking about this and the truth is that, yes, sometimes, it's easier to just loath. I'm tired. And aside from the everyday, I battle my depression symptoms on a daily. ​​​​​​​​
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However, not everyday is a hard day for me. (In the aspect of my depression or anything else.) There are good days. And you know what, those good days are the days that I pull myself up and fight to be the Mom I want to be. Not the Mom I feel like I'm being. ​​​​​​​​
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I love the saying that you should dress for the job you want, not the job you have. Welp, I feel like our mindsets need to also be dressed for the job we want too. And none of us WANT to be hot mess mamas, or self-loathing. ​​​​​​​​
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We want to feel like we are successful and productive. Which means we need to make that happen. ​​​​​​​​
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What changes do you need to make to get yourself to where you want to be? ​​​​​​​​
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To all the Mamas that feel this; sending hugs.
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This job is really hard. And sometimes we forget that; because we are at "home" we feel like we should be able to do it all and have it all together.
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I'm not encouraging the "hot mess mama" thing... because we are not a hot mess. We're just tired and need to evaluate and rework some thing to make our jobs a little easier and more manageable.
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But we might have hot mess mama days. And that's okay. We just need to take a breath and pick ourselves up again.
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Either way, remember that you are enough.
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If you haven't heard of the "Mother in Process" podcast, you need to check it out! ​​​​​​​​
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Mamas...We need to take care of our mental health. We need to make better choices, and Amy; with her tough love approach is establishing a community where we can really think about shifting our mindsets. ​​​​​​​​
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Go listen to this episode: Winning as a SAHM is selfish.​​​​​​​​
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She speaks about investing in ourselves in order to WIN in motherhood. Listen to the entire episode. Don’t get angry if you hear something you don’t like… let her finish! ​​​​​​​​
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This is not an ad, I just really like her approach and think we can all benefit from her POV. ​​​​​​​​
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How? Keep Reading Mamas...
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We tend to get stuck in a place of having no energy, which leads to no motivation, but we have to work to pull ourselves up.
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Even in my darkest of depression days, I know that watching Hendrix dance and giggle is going to make me smile and I am going to feel joy! And that small moment is what will help pull me up.
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So use it! Use that moment and make more joy; even if in the simplest of ways.
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Read a book to your kids.
Sing a song and do a little dance with your kids.
Go get FroYo with your kids.
Pop popcorn and actively watch what your kids want to watch.
Make cookies with your kids.
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Notice a pattern of "your kids"... they are your joy! Granted, somedays they're your headache, but generally speaking, because of the love you have for them, seeing them happy and joyful, in turn, makes you feel joy too.
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Raising my Kids... That is ALWAYS the thought I turn to, especially if in the moment I can't think of anything I feel I am doing right. It's my go-to. How my kids are being raised is exactly right for them. I know that to my core. ​​​​​​​​
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Not that they're perfect, or that I'm the perfect Mom. But that I am mothering, teaching, nurturing, loving them exactly right for who they are. Everything else might be a question mark to me, but not that. ​​​​​​​​
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So... think of your go-to. Have it ready for when you're struggling. ​​​​​​​​
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What's you're celebration? What do you know you're doing right? Comment below. ​​​​​​​​
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🤍 Part of my struggle with Mental Health has been my eating disorders and negative body image. I continue to work on it everyday.
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Today my website turns 1! They say that every failure is a lesson, and that every lesson is an experience to grow. Although I know this is true, my heart still hurts when I feel like I fail at something. ​​​​​​​​
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I didn't fail my blog. I very much am proud of it and I believe that the idea I have of having a space in the world where I can share my story, struggles, and celebrations is unique and valuable. ​​​​​​​​
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What I failed at this last year is knowing my limits. I fell into a very hard depressive state a couple of months after launch, and haven't been able to catch back up. So if you are a subscriber to thatssohazel.com, I am sorry for that. ​​​​​​​​
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However, with humility comes wisdom. I know I need to take things slow, take care of me, and get back to it when I'm ready and when I am capable. Even if it means starting very small. (Which if you know me, is a challenge. I am a go-big kinda girl!) ​​​​​​​​
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Regardless of that, today I am celebrating the one year anniversary of my launch. Here's to authenticity, humility, and taking your dreams slowly. Cheers! ​​​​​​​​
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Su***de is the SECOND leading cause of death among TEN TO THIRTY-FOUR???!!! WHAT?????
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You guys! This BROKE my heart. All of it does, but the thought of these babies struggling so badly that it has become the 2nd leading cause of death is a PROBLEM.
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We need to find a way to support mental health MORE. We need to find a way to save lives.
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And if YOU are struggling, PLEASE seek help! You are not alone and you are SO SO WORTHY and SO SO LOVED.
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***de ***dehelp

So... I'm guilty! ​​​​​​​​
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Don't get me wrong, there are things that I feel good about myself for. Things I know are strengths of mine, and so much I love about my life. ​​​​​​​​
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But Ms. Comparison still sneaks in ... a lot. And she's a real bitch! ​​​​​​​​
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In honor of International Women’s Day; let’s practice supporting one another and not comparing ourselves to one another. ​​​​​​​​
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Like and share this post if you’re in!​​​​​​​​
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My hobbies include leading worship at church, home decor, party planning, and blogging/creating content for mental health. I've also recently started working out again.
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During a low period, doing anyone of these, (but especially singing) help to lift me up a bit.
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What are some of your hobbies?
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Please don't give up on therapy! Not only can it take the average person up to TEN sessions before they begin to feel better, BUT you may need to try a few different therapists as well.
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I know... nobody wants to have to do the back and forth but it's important to your health. Don't give up!
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This goes for pretty much anything! ​​​​​​​​
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If you're making changes for yourself, stick to it. Don't stop. Nothing good ever comes easily. Hang in there. ​​​​​​​​
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I've tried several times to manage my depression without medication. But the truth is, I can't. I'm not ashamed of it...anymore. And it isn't a "girl, you can do anything!", "empowerment" thing... I just point blank, don't do well if I'm not on them.
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Some do a great job of managing without them. And if that's you... that's AMAZING and Good for you. But it doesn't work for me.
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I'm just a better me; THE better me if I use them as part of my treatment. And I've experienced ALL of the cons that you see here, at one time or another, but have been able to find a balance and make it all work better for me.
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If you're on the fence, know that there are most definitely advantages, but talk to your doctor about it so you can come up with a plan of action together,
find, and stick with what works for you.
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🤍 ​​​​​​​​
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It can be hard to know what to say when someone is going through a hard time, and especially, if someone is struggling with something that you may not understand. So here is a little guide to help.
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If you're new here, Welcome! If you're not, you know I'm an open book. Either way, I'm happy you're here. I hope to be helpful to you in some way.
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We're not mad at you... but sometimes, we don't need solutions. Just compassion, and love.
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I share a lot on here because there is a need to do so. It isn't easy for me. In fact, I do a lot of revising because I go back and forth about sharing too much, or not enough. ​​​​​​​​
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I always want to be authentic and truthful, because it isn't helpful otherwise. But sharing my personal struggles, and creating content to educate and help others can be triggering. ​​​​​​​​
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For whatever reason, the idea to do this has been on my heart for years. I don't always get it all right, and I most certainly don't have it all figured out. ​​​​​​​​
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But I hope that it's helping someone; even if it's just knowing someone else out there understands what you're going through.

Pay attention to your symptoms and how you're coping. If you're not the one who struggles, pay attention to those around you who do, and their behaviors.
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Knowing the cause of your depression can be extremely helpful to your treatment.

Depression sucks, but it’s not stronger than you. On your hardest days, and in your lowest disdain, remember that you are the daughter of a King; you can do this!​​​​​​​​
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Know your options & find what works for you.
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Mental Health Tip: Living with depression requires a certain lifestyle, so make sure you’re being proactive!
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