Michelle McCarthy, Licensed Clinical Mental Health Counselor/Supervisor

Love this! Need to click on it to see whole thing....

Check One Love Foundation website!

ℹ️🌿 TOXIC RELATIONSHIP RED FLAGS: WHAT YOU NEED TO KNOW BEFORE IT’S TOO LATE |

A toxic relationship exists when the negative patterns of interaction consistently outweigh the positive ones.

These relationships do not only occur in intimate relationships between romantic partners. Toxicity happens in friendships, family connections, or work environments. The hallmarks of a toxic relationship include persistent conflict, manipulation, lack of respect, and emotional or psychological abuse.

At the most extreme end of the spectrum, the effects of toxic relationships on mental and emotional health can be severe and long-lasting. For example, individuals in toxic relationships experience chronic stress, anxiety, and depression.

Read the Full Article: https://tarnetwork.org/toxic-relationship-red-flags-what-you-need-to-know-before-its-too-late/



📷: understandingthenarc, quote: Maria Consiglio

Leaving an abusive relationship is incredibly hard. Read the 11 reasons why people stay. https://www.joinonelove.org/learn/why_leaving_abuse_is_hard/

Many of us have experienced this truth.

In her newly released letters, Gabby gets real about the toxic reality of her relationship. If you're spotting red flags in your relationships, check out our 10 Signs guide. https://ow.ly/MR7e50SjYGc
Her fam is now dedicated to helping the families of missing people of color, who often don't get the attention they deserve. Let's support and help spread awareness.

Gabby Petito Foundation

https://www.facebook.com/share/X24tw62uqayf8iFM/?mibextid=oFDknk

And to be fair.....same goes the other way around!

We’ve been conditioned to believe negative emotions mean something is wrong with us. But anger, sadness, and every other “negative” emotion is just a part of life. The remedy isn’t to repress emotions or deny they exist— it’s to allow them. To find simple ways to raise our emotional energy. Sometimes it’s through sitting in the sun hearing the birds chirp (great for our vagal tone), sometimes we just need a nap. Other times we need time in silent or a good cuddle. Emotions come and go. And we have the power to choose to make choices that allow those emotions to process and fade

ℹ️🌿 REPARENTING YOUR INNER CHILD: HEALING THE PAST, EMBRACING THE PRESENT |

Historically, psychotherapeutic approaches have focused on immediate solutions. This approach fits within our society’s desire for an accelerated pace and quick, tangible outcomes.

Our collective imagination does not see psychotherapy as a journey, a journey of returning to the inner wisdom that resides within us, a journey of infinite possibilities. On the contrary, society sees psychotherapy as a treatment-focused cure, where an expert provides magical strategies to regulate anxiety or mitigate stress, without discomfort or effort.

Don't get me wrong- tools are important in the therapeutic process. Nonetheless, tools are useless, if we do not understand our wounds that require tools to heal. Without the work of getting to know our internal system, we end up relapsing into the same dysfunctional patterns that continuously re-infect the wound.

Read the Full Article: https://woventraumatherapy.com/blog/reparenting-inner-child



📷: xavierdagba.com

ℹ️🌿 HOW TO STOP BEING STRONG |

You may have looked twice at the title because, what’s wrong with being strong? Most of my clients would describe themselves this way and others see them that way, too.

However, being strong is yet another symptom of growing up in a dysfunctional home. When honest emotions or making mistakes are viewed as punishable weaknesses, you decide you better man (or woman) up to survive.

Children aren’t supposed to be strong. Dependent on the adults around them, they play and explore their world without fear because mom and dad have their back.

Oh, wait, that doesn’t sound like your childhood? You mean your parents not only didn’t have your back but were the source of the threat?

Read the Full Article: https://www.laurakconnell.com/blog/being-strong



📷: kathyberman.com, (Pinterest)

Childhood has a profound impact on how we attach to other people. Many people cope with difficult childhood experiences through denial or avoidance “oh it wasn’t the best, but it was normal” or “it happened a long time ago, I don’t need to think about it now.”

But whether or not we want to think about or process our childhood— there it is. In our friendships, and maybe most prominent in our romantic relationships. Where our past shows up in how we treat others, how we’re able to connect, and what we do when we’re triggered by the people closest to us. Our childhood lives in our daily patterns— not just our body.

If you want a long-term, sustainable, connected relationship, the best thing you can do is face your past. Learn how it impacts how you attach, and empower yourself to practice skills like emotional regulation.

Anyone can heal. Anyone can evolve. Anyone can build healthy relationships regardless of their past.

What do YOU think?

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Sarah R. Moore, Dandelion Seeds Positive Parenting ❤

😂😂😂

If you're a parent of a teenager or young adult, check out this article about breaking generational patterns of codependency: https://www.livewellwithsharonmartin.com/generational-codependency-parenting-young-adults/

Most of our deepest wounds as humans don’t come from what happened to us— they actually come from what didn’t happen when we needed it most.

Our core need is for safety and stability. That means protection and belonging.

As adults these wounds manifest as: becoming hyper-independent, high perfectionism, chronic “social anxiety,” trust issues, inability to emotionally regulation, avoidance, and self sabotage.

The work is to understand what you didn’t get. To grieve the situations— which usually feels like actually allowing yourself to be angry. To picture your younger self and know you deserved better. To forgive yourself for all the behaviors that came from your survival mode.

We all experience trauma, pain, and suffering. This is part of the human experience. And we all have the opportunity to alchemize our suffering through self compassion. To fully take responsibility for our lives. And to slowly (baby steps!) build a new future.

Where there’s trauma there is also opportunity for growth

Here’s a friendly reminder as we start another week!

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The happiness trap is something we’re conditioned to believe since childhood.

That someone can and should make us happy. And that happiness is the goal in relationships.

The truth is life has many moments where we aren’t happy. We go through seasons and changes. There’s times of celebration and joy and times of crisis and suffering.

In partnerships where there is trust and admiration there were plenty of periods where there wasn’t happiness. These partners had the resilience and nervous system capacity to stay connected, to get through the discomfort, and to continue to choose each other in action— even when it didn’t *feel* good.

What we should learn as children is: find a partner that allows you to feel safe. Who truly allows you to be yourself. Who reminds you of who you are, lets you be in a mood, accepts when you’re not your best self, but holds you accountable to becoming that person

What a healthy relationship between mother and daughter in law looks like❤️
https://www.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=822998865855511&id=100044362152366&post_id=100044362152366_822998865855511&mibextid=CDWPTG

TO MY SON’S FUTURE PARTNER

It is hard, so hard, to imagine a day where I will not be the moon, the sun and the sky to my little man.
When he is sad, he calls for me.
When he is scared, it’s me he wants.
When he feels excited, I am the one he rushes to tell first.

I am the keeper of his secrets, the finder of anything which is lost and the solver of any known problem in his little world.
I am his everything and he is mine.

One day, you will have the pleasure of being his everything.
One day it will be you that he comes to, and that is, of course, the way it should be.

But I wonder if you will ever think of me sometimes, perhaps let me be the first to share some good news with you – or allow me the honour of pulling you both out of some trouble life may throw at you.
I will be waiting, ready and willing.

I will not meddle or fuss or pull you in opposite directions I promise you that, and should you be blessed with children of your own, there will be no one, no one on this earth who will love them more than I.

The bond between a mother and a son is divine, this much is true, but I wish for him the very same bond with you.

And I pray the circle of love goes on and on and on, much further than me.

After all, that is what I brought him up to do.

Love.

Donna Ashworth
From ‘to the women’
My new book is open for preorder…
WILD HOPE:
healing words to find light on dark days ♥️
https://amzn.eu/d/eDGFsCs

Art by Lore Pemberton