urtherapist_favetherapist

When you change the way you look at things; the things you look at will change.

Mindset is everything. It could take 3,5, or 30 years to get there, but you must believe in yourself. Tomorrow is not promised what can you do now to prepare for your future.

I am not my hair anymore. When I was old enough to choose my hairstyles at about 11yo, I would perm it, press it, or put a weave in it. I presumed if it was that way I would fit in better or like the skin I was in. It wasn’t until 2014 when I started embracing my true essence. I wanted to explore myself and that included the natural texture of my hair. It was a complicated transition especially since my ex-husband was not a fan of natural hair. Yet, this was my journey to get to know me and accept loving my whole self. My natural texture has become a crown I love to wear unapologetically. I want to thank me for the willingness.

Comment below 👇🏾Have you attached your hair to how you view yourself?

New year, new you NOT!!! You’re still the same person. There wasn’t some magic wand that changed your baggage, negative beliefs, and behaviors at midnight on January 1st. However you can overcome those items.

Join me for Healthy Happy Hour Thursday at 6pm EST where we discuss forming new habits for peace, joy, and prosperity.

Comment below👇🏾 a habit you want to overcome

Normalize loving ourselves unapologetically
Set great standards
Build yourself from the inside out
Conform to nothing
Learn to say hell no
Create the life you deserve

The thing is are you willing to be patient for what you deserve. This is also in relation to business relationships, social connections, even your nail lady or doctor. Don’t settle sis/sir.

Share this with someone who needs to work on self love

Social media can be a fraud; people have life difficulties and obstacles also. So while these highlights seem like rainbows and unicorns for others that’s false. With that being said focus on what you have to offer, your blessings, opportunities, and silver linings. Stay in your lane and you will get to your happy place.

Comment below👇🏾one thing you are grateful for

What we don’t discuss??!! No worries I’m good y’all. Still I get it. You’re not sure if you’re coming or going between sleep deprivation, body aches, peeing at the drop of a dime, hormones raging, mommy guilt, just being the lifeline. It gets real.

Check in on mothers: 1 in 8 women experience postpartum depression and only half of those mothers get treatment.
A better you is a better mom for your child.

Comment below👇🏾what is the hardest thing about motherhood. Sending light and love ❤️

Birth story Part 2: I got into the office after crying in the elevator and I was 7cm dilated. Immediately walking into the office my water broke too. That gush gushes y’all lol. My beautiful black midwife said let me call L&D and tell them we’re coming over. So I walked over to the hospital it’s literally next door less than a block. They offered a wheel chair, but moving kept me distracted from those crazy contractions. Once in the hospital room, I stripped down and got put on some monitors and let the contractions happen.

Three hours later as I’m using the bathroom I yell “I wanna push.” Then I said while tears were dropping “I’m scared”. Now up until that point, people had asked was I scared, nervous, worried. I’d say “Nope, she coming regardless”; why focus on those emotions instead I’d focus on her sweet face, kindred spirit, fiery attitude, bold personality and the joy she would bring to the world in all her glory. I leaped into the hospital bed from the bathroom.

And as your body speaks to you in its own way I was 10cm dilated. It was time to push. They instructed me to push when contractions came in, yet now the pain had moved. I pushed for 42 minutes and then our fierce warrior princess was born. During that time, I praised my husband, midwife, and the nurse for being so kind and patient with me. I also made jokes. I touched the crown of her head; she’s a hairy one. I was present in the moment and what a moment it was. And at 7:12pm she was born 7lbs 11oz. Wonderfully and beautifully made.

Moral: Focus on the emotions that will yield greater works. Believe that you can do it. Ask for what you want because I had a ton of things on my birth plan. And have a written plan in place for your future.

Sending light and love ❤️ New Mother

That’s your assignment for the rest of the year. Let’s not wait till 2022 start now.

Leave a goal you started recently or plan to start in the comments below 👇🏾
Sending light and love ❤️

Forget what your followers say
Instagram has no hold over you
Celebrities are not Gods
Not about what mommy, daddy or anyone has to say

What do you care about most?
What do you say to you?
So many people reinforce their trauma response and make it about what others think or feel, but therapy can help you care more about you. Therapy says I love me.

Sending light and love ❤️

That’s my mommy y’all, with me in her stomach in 1984. Yes I’m 37 and proud of it. This mommy journey is a whole new world. So first I want to say thanks Big Cutie for being a determined, sweet, kind, challenging, loving, compassionate, forgiving, present mother and so much more.

Next shoot out to all mothers biological or otherwise, mothers who lost babies, who trying to have babies, single mothers, ladies who lost their mother, mothers who have strained relationships with their children, and mothers overall. I honor all mothers. Thanks to all the mothers who have been great role models for me. Love y’all.

Tag a mother who need to know she is a BOSS. Side note: Get ready to be a auntie.

Everybody won’t support your magic. Your magic is intimidating to many. Stay focused you can’t be stopped. Your value can’t be comprehended, so they rather devalue it. Remember that gold has a lot of value, yet even when they attempt to minimize your value whatever you produce holds value.
*Coal is one of our biggest energy producers*
It’s all about the eye of the beholder.

Everybody not for you, don’t let that stop you. You have so much greatness. Sending light and love ❤️

Happy 1 month Raleigh Anniversary!

I moved to North Carolina 8 months pregnant with my beautiful black man. Let’s just say it’s been an adventure navigating a new place, finding providers (nails, doctors, etc.) We had some difficulty with our moving company who provided false information and still missing items. I’m away from everyone I know. Additionally, setting up a new bigger home, finding fabulous furniture and providing therapy to the stars.🤩But guess what?!!! I’m doing it.

So next time you get discouraged remember who the F you are and you can do this. It wasn’t always easy, but I’m proud of me. After this pretty equipped to do almost anything. Did I mention slept on a air mattress for a few days?!!!

Sending light, love, and courage to WORK and TWERK!!!

The prerequisite for healing is a wound. Everyone can relate to feeling hurt, but everyone cannot relate to recovery and healing. At times, it feels like a Mac truck hit us other times it’s more subtle. No day is the same, just embrace the process of healing. While healing feel all those feelings. All you have is all you need and most important is the courage to face you.

Sending light and love ❤️ Fave Therapist

Double tap if you are working on healing

We have no control. How many times have you been able to stop yourself from using the bathroom eventually it’s happening? It’s quite hard to place something where it’s just doesn’t belong because you think so.

Relinquishing is different for each one of us dependent on season, mindset, status, etc. it still remains we can let go and still prosper.

Things I relinquished:
My pregnant body
Being a wife letting him lead
Being scared
My losses being wins
Accepting the pain
Let people be people
Love
The process

Your thoughts aren’t always kind to you so challenge them. Embrace the fact that you are a bad ass phenomenal woman or man. Speak over yourself. Affirmations can change your life.

Lastly, yes someone through dirt on your name, but don’t let that seed get rooted. You have control. Be your greatest hype man. Sending light and love ❤️

Need a hype man who is also a therapist DM “Self Love”

It is such a honor to be a mother. I am overjoyed I get the pleasure to grow my fierce warrior princess.

What I have seen is mothers become consumed by their children. It’s all about their looks, their growth, their care starting to neglect who they can be or were prior to being a mother.

As mothers are the lifeline to children remember to TEACH the children how to LIVE. Yes, sacrifices have to be made for the children. Are you sacrificing all of you which could be depleting to mental and physical health? One day, you will be empty nester and what will you remember about you. I’m excited about the person you are becoming because you decided to stretch yourself for you, your children, and the community.

Sending light and love ❤️
Tag another mother

Just because your single doesn’t mean it won’t happen. It’s the time to get to know you the best. Most of us barely know who we are because we trying be like someone else or run from our true self. Take the time to focus on you. Date you, love on you, work on you because you and the future spouse deserve it.

And if you keep running into dogs that just makes you a dog catcher. Every experience gives you a lesson. And if you’re really serious about receiving your spouse you must become more self aware. For the married people you deserve to get to know you also. The work shouldn’t stop.

Happy Friday! Tag a single person who need this message.

Back to School Pics and Tips:

1. Let the children be excited about school. Make all attempts to avoid placing your anxiety about Covid or anything else on the children.

2. Encourage downtime (self care habits) best to start early and not just at bedtime. This allows to children to get in touch when their mind and body increase mental health wellness.

3. Praise goes a long way for everybody. You may feel like that’s what your child supposed to do, yet children are seeking validation.

4. Ask more open ended questions to the children about their day. Examples: What made you smile today? What is one thing you would change about your day? What games do you play at recess/gym? How did you get to be the helper today? Who were you kind to today? What made you frown today? What are you looking forward to at school?

5. Remember you were a child once although they have different obstacles they have feelings and thoughts that need to be addressed. Build compassion.

Children are sponges so they will soak up your stuff. Have you looked at your stuff lately? Comment 👇🏾on the tip that spoke to you.

Sending light and love ❤️Rich Auntie bout to be a Mommy

You have the courage.
You have the will.
You have the faith.
You have the love.
You have the patience.
You have the wisdom.
You have the time.
You have the support.
You have the confidence.
You have the intelligence.
You have the strength.
You have everything you need in this moment.

I’d believe as a therapist and self love coach I help individuals open up their door to these traits.

DM “Self Love” for help

I deserve peace.
I deserve joy.
I deserve love.
I deserve a multi-million dollar business.
I deserve kindness.
I deserve thriving relationships that build me up.
I deserve abundant opportunities for prosperity and success.
I deserve gentleness.
I deserve a lavish home.
I deserve to gain wisdom.
I deserve fabulous vacations.
I deserve a husband that loves me like the church.
I deserve to be celebrated.
I deserve to be on magazine covers in beautiful clothing.
I deserve a faith that grows daily.
I deserve obstacles that I frame as opportunities to excel me.

Jeremiah 29:11 ~ For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you plans to give you hope and a future.

What do you deserve? Comment below 👇🏾

We project the energy we already have inside ourselves. You wonder why you attract certain individuals what are saying to yourself? Are those negative thoughts consuming you then you reinforce them by gravitating to people who not for you. Yes you will be tested by individuals, we all will be. The question will you let them stay in the circle or will you set the appropriate boundaries.

Let’s get into wholeness and healing so people know without hesitation you feel great about you each and every part.
DM “Self Love” for help

Who said completing your goals was supposed to be easy? It won’t be a walk in the park it might be like running in the sand on a 90 degree day. However, we need that discomfort to respect the outcome. Most people squander what comes to easy. The struggle is needed.

I’m excited about my obstacles: Are you excited? Identify a goal for you. Comment 👇🏾 below

The other day I went to the beach, had on a dress, ran into a photographer, and now they call me Mrs.Polite.

👗:
💄:
💇🏽‍♀️:
📸:
Lashes:
Eyebrows:

The past is not the present get rid of it. Holding on to dead weight, romanticizing about the good ol’ days. Keeping some of those objects will allow you to be stuck. Decide what you want for yourself. Once you let it go I can guarantee something better will replace it. It’s so freeing to move in simplicity because I’ve learned less is much more.

It reminds me of the quarantine we had less to do, but we gained better relationships, insights, perspectives, etc.

Happy birthday to Me!!!

Drunk “fun” nights cost next day production

Great s*x but he/she undermines your value (toxic relationship)

Big salary with egotistical insensitive management

Shopping sprees unsure how you going pay your bills

Delicious meals that don’t digest well 😉

We must respect that we can’t have it both ways and positioning ourselves to grow rather than what culture says works is more important.

Where does your peace of mind reside?

Tag someone below 👇🏾 who needs this message

🙋🏽‍♀️I did it. I would date from my trauma response knowing he wasn’t for me. I refused to be alone. I feel in love with what I thought was “love.” We often want someone to be our savior when we haven’t even made a decision to save ourselves. Loneliness is scary, isolating, uncomfortable, yet you have the courage to find comfort in yourself. Fall for you!!

Lastly, there is someone out there who wants a healthy, whole, exciting relationship and they deserve you coming correct. Your loneliness should not be the reason you date. Let’s not use people because that’s just selfish.

Sending light and love ❤️

No disappointments or regrets even the wack ISH I did. I’m appreciative it got me here. And this life is glorious.

I know it’s hard to remember in the breaking you are being built; I can promise a time is coming where you will say I needed that. Lessons in everythang!!!

Sending light and love ❤️
Tap if you’re grateful for your journey good, bad everything in between.