Birth Garden Doula

Transpersonal experiences are nested/connected

The transpersonal experience of our own birth is imprinted in our cells, bones, tissues

Somatic characteristics of entheogenic(psychedelic) and birthing experiences mirror those that occurred during our experience in the womb + being born and thus can trigger a reliving of these experiences (there is much more to this, I’ll be discussing in future posts)

Through transpersonal experiences (e.g., psychedelic, birthing) - we have deeper access and the ability to identify, understand, and integrate the experience and trauma of our perinatal time (as babies) and potentially heal our primary wounds that so often remain elusive during ordinary states of consciousness.

Birth is a s*xual experience - s*x and birth are a continuum, the same hormones and systems are at work

Throughout the birth process we need to feel safe, supported, and unobserved in a quiet, dim, and peaceful environment - much like the womb

Being watched, assessed, disturbed, etc are all things that contribute to a disruptions in the birth flow (hormones + systems + brain waves) and can lead to interventions

When we feel unsafe in labor, our bodies respond instinctively by releasing stress hormones that slow or stop our labor in order to prevent birthing in an unsafe environment - THIS IS NOT YOUR BODY FAILING YOU, THIS IS YOUR BODY TRYING TO PROTECT YOU AND YOUR BABY

The birthing atmosphere should mirror one that you would feel comfortable having a totally free, unhindered s*xual experience in - if you wouldn’t feel comfortable making love there, you probably won’t feel comfortable/safe birthing there

*xualexperience

Birth is a transpersonal experience ~~
Brain waves and altered states of consciousness through the birth process
•

What if I told you we are all walking around carrying unhealed trauma from our own births? Our own experience in the womb + our birth matters.
Being born is an inherently stressful event - the struggle against a closed cervix, being tightly compressed and squeezed through the birth canal, quickly transitioning from a water creature to an air breathing organism.. it’s an intense journey. Then you throw in that most of us were born via the system - pulled from the safety of a dark and wet womb and into a cold, sterile environment, strange sights, sounds, smells, poked and prodded by unfamiliar hands, cord clamped and cut, strange goop put in our eyes, many of us taken from our mothers and placed in an isolated nursery, etc etc.
I believe that many of our difficulties as adults - fear of abandonment, fear of being alone, unworthiness, feeling unlovable, anxiety, depression, etc can be traced back to our own births. This trauma is stored in our soma and manifests throughout our lives in myriad ways.
Ideally we are able to work through much of this as we grow and if we become pregnant, through the prenatal time (there are some great therapies out there, holotropic breathwork is an example).
I do believe however, that the transpersonal experience of birthing can provide an immense amount of healing with the right conditions, as birthing a baby is the mirror to being born.
This is one of the reasons why I am such a strong advocate for undisturbed birth - it provides us the opportunity to become completely immersed in our birth, for the ego to dissolve (via hormones and brain waves like theta and delta), for us to find the core of ourselves and for us to do the heroic and restorative work of birthing our babies, and ourselves, anew.

What I’m calling in for us ~~~

What I’m currently calling in~

Honor your baby’s transition from womb to earth, leave the cord intact

A quick guide to undisturbed + physiological placenta birth ~~

The birth of your placenta is a huge and meaningful part of your birth!

Physiological placenta birth led completely by the birthing person is a beautiful + empowering way to honor this sacred tree of life ❤️

A quick guide to undisturbed + physiological placenta birth ~~

The birth of your placenta is a huge and meaningful part of your birth!

Physiological placenta birth led completely by the birthing person is beautiful and empowering ❤️

We are not meant to be quiet, to be manageable, to do as we are told.
We have the earth in our bones, the rivers and oceans in our blood, the moon in our eyes.
As we birth we breathe deeply, we roar, we move our bodies in the ancient ways.
As we birth we go home, we walk the path of our ancestors and of all the living things that came before.
As we birth we remember who we are ~~

Artwork by Alba Paleo

Love for Nettles~~

“One of the highest sources of digestible iron in plant form, rich in calcium, vitamin A, magnesium, chlorophyll, potassium, and B vitamins, nettle strengthens and supports the whole body. Long valued as a food and medicine, it is used for anemia, fatigue, edema, and menstrual difficulties”.

Nettle is one of my favorite herbals for all things related to the magick of our reproductive systems ✨✨

Nettles as medicine:

Nourishes adrenals + eases fatigue

Regulates blood sugar

Tones + strengthens kidneys, lungs, intestines, and arteries

Digestive restoration + improves nutrient intake

Restorative laxative effect

Builds iron levels + enriches the blood
-Supportive in pregnancy for those who are experiencing chronic fatigue/low energy due to insufficient iron. *Some herbalists recommend avoiding herbs in the first trimester*

Reduces water retention/edema

Strengthens vascular system + reduces risk of hemorrhoids

Anti-hemorrhagic power for labor + postpartum (high vitamin K content)

Increases flow of milk + restores and replenishes energy postpartum

Maintains vitality of s*xual centers

Additionally, nettles are a wonderful remedy for most things related to the moon cycle, as well as those entering + experiencing menopause

Excellent for balancing through the cycle and is a specific remedy for excessive menstruation*

~ Infusion
1 heaping tablespoon of dried nettle leaf per cup of water
Add to boiling water, turn off heat and steep covered for 10-30 minutes, strain.
Drink 1-2 cups/day (I drink a bit more during menstruation)

Lunar infusion 🌙
Steep at room temperature overnight in the light of the moon (jar + tight-fitting lid)

Sources:
- Healing Wise by Susan W**d
- Herbal Medicine from the Heart of the Earth by Dr. Sharol Marie Tilgner
- Herbal Healing for Women
by Rosemary Gladstar
- The Natural Pregnancy Book
by Aviva Romm

Notes on trusting the path ~~

One of my assignments for midwifery school this quarter was to create your own dream birth model. We studied the technocratic, heroic, and holistic models and were encouraged to dream bigger + dig deeper. The Heart-Womb model is my dream and what I hope to create for my community as I develop from student to Midwife. Other pages not shown include prenatal care and miscarriage + abortion support, and I’ll continue to add to this booklet as my path unfolds. Feel free to zoom in and explore ~~

*Cervical fluid = fertile*
*Dry days = non-fertile*

Cervical fluid is necessary for s***m to survive, thrive, and travel to where they need to go. When we’re not in the phase of our cycle that produces cervical fluid (fertile window), we can’t get pregnant.
*(Unless your follicular phase is super short/your wave begins right after bleeding, info for another time).

You can think of your cervical fluid (mucous that is post-menstrual/pre-luteal with lots of variation in consistency: sticky,creamy/lotion, slippery, clear/watery, stretchy/egg white) as fertility fluid.
More lubricative = more fertile (aka Peak day)

After menstruation it’s common to experience 4-6 days of “dryness” before we notice a point of change in our cervical fluid - this marks the beginning of the fertile wave.

Rising estrogen (leading up to its peak at ovulation) causes cervical fluid to be produced for ~1-6 days prior to ovulation, so you could become pregnant during that time because s***m can hang out in your cervical fluid for up to 5 days waiting for you to ovulate.

After ovulation (you can confirm ovulation by tracking your basal body temp aka BBT, which will rise the day after ovulation), our cervical fluid dries up and the luteal phase begins (estrogen lowers and progesterone rises).
**It’s important to count 4 days after ovulation as part of your fertile wave to be on the safe side

So we have:
~6 days pre-ovulation
+ 4 days post-ovulation/post-peak
= 10 day fertile window (upper level average)

Everyone’s cycle is different and therefore the length of your fertile wave could be shorter or longer, get to know your cervical fluid!

Fertility awareness is super fun and empowering, there’s so much to gain from tracking/charting your cycle and checking in with your body everyday! ❤️❤️❤️

There is SO much to be said and shared about this topic, the more you look into the system + the way our culture holds/views birth, the more you find.
I am always here to having open + honest conversations with anyone who is interested in learning together with me.

If this statement peaks your interest, feel free to DM me or reach out through my website ~~
Let’s talk about autonomous pregnancy and birth!

The technocratic system, which is the primary belief system of mainstream hospitals, views birth as inherently defective/dangerous - this may not be explicitly stated by those who conform to this model, but it is apparent in treatment/protocols
(also this model is not confined to hospitals; there are midwives who practice under the technocratic system)

The highest value of the technocratic paradigm is separation; separation of mind and body, of birthing person and baby, of birthing person from themselves + their experience, etc.

Under this system the body is seen as a machine/birthing person is seen as an object (“patient”) that most conform to certain rules that have been set in place by the system. (All rules are the same for every “patient”, regardless of what is actually showing up individually)
e.g. if you go over 42 weeks you will be induced, or if you’re receiving care from a State midwife, care will be transferred and you will be strongly encouraged to induce (even if parent and baby are healthy and showing no signs of distress and parent does not feel it’s right for them)

Because birth is dangerous, it therefore needs to be controlled using standard/routine practices that have nothing to do with the individual and everything to do with the underlying beliefs of the system and the efforts to protect them.
This often leads to aggressive + unnecessary intervention

This paradigm is hierarchical, placing the doctor/institution at the top of the hierarchy

Rather than the birthing person being at the center of their experience and the system existing to support that experience, birthing people are often told what/when/how things will happen to them in accordance to the standardized rules of the system
E.g “tomorrow you will come in for an induction”
“Next week you will come in for your 20 week scan”
There are countless examples
Informed choice is difficult because of how normalized these procedures have become

Continued in comments

“Continuous EFM is associated with many known medical risks to birthing people, without providing any benefit to the fetus in low-risk pregnancies.” (ACOG)

The evidence that clearly shows EFM is ineffectual, prone to errors, and increases interventions without improving outcomes is well-known. Yet, somehow, continuous EFM is still part of routine “care” for every pregnant person in the majority of US hospitals (it’s one of the most common obstetrical procedures in use). This is a CULTURAL RITUAL and has nothing to do with what’s best for birthing person/baby.

EFM:
* Has an extremely high false-positive rate, often leading to unnecessary stress/intervention/surgery; “non-reassuring fetal heart tones” is the second most common reason for first-time cesareans

* Increases risk of cesarean and instrumental vaginal birth when compared to hands-on listening

* Limits mobility of the birthing person - potentially discouraging them from following the guidance of their body, which can increase pain

* Directs attention towards the monitor and away from the birthing person, depersonalizing + dominating the birth experience (what I call “technocratic worship”)

* May distract the birthing person and trigger the neo-cortex, making it more difficult to enter into the labor flow

* Uses continuous Doppler ultrasound (Doppler is significantly more potent than pulsed diagnostic-ultrasound and subjects the fetus to much higher rates of exposure - we still do not understand the long-term effects of ultrasound and evidence supports their use only when medically indicated + for shortest possible duration/lowest exposure)

* Is commonly not an informed choice of the birthing person

* Is expensive

A wide range of studies have shown that intermittent “hands-on” listening using fetoscope or hand-held Doppler is a safer, more accurate option that results in less unnecessary interventions (EBB). “Consensus among professional and governmental groups is that, based on the evidence, intermittent auscultation (listening) is safer to use in healthy birthing people with uncomplicated pregnancies than electronic fetal monitoring”. (Heelan, 2013)

For much of the world, midwives are the primary birth attendants for healthy birthing people & babies + physicians are called upon only when medical or surgical intervention is required.

Midwives are experts in normal physiological pregnancy/birth compared to OBs who are surgeons trained to find/manage complications

The midwifery model of care views birth as a normal physiological process and places the birthing person at the center of their experience

The medical model views birth as pathological/dangerous; a medical event aimed at preventing complications before they occur

•The US is one of the only developed nations with more OBs than midwives

•Only ~8% of US births are attended by midwives

•The US has one of the highest infant + maternal mortality rates among developed nations

(CDC, 2021; Moos, 2005; WHO, 2018)

Posted • ._night
I communicate the value of embodiment by starting with The System,
bc the whole point of embodiment is to disrupt The System.

The System, as we know, is not pro-humxnity. People are disregulated, anxious/depression, out of touch, stuck and disconnected.

ALL OF THIS is a function of a System that decentralizes the body as the locus of experience.

Call it white supremacy culture, colonization or patriarchy,
it functions on the worship of verbal knowledge.
(Credit to Tema Okun)

What does worship of verbal knowledge look like?

It says - feelings and intuition, or what Muse Alchemy calls, embodied knowing, is less real and also less important than physical, written or spoken knowledge.

As a result, culturally, we struggle in the gap between words and the wordless.

It feels especially difficult when we have experiences beyond explanation.

A moment, a divine knowing that could never be captured or confined.

These sensations change everything.
How we run our business,
choose a partner,
relate to our community,
they change who we are.

And yet, for many people, this is an unusual, extraordinary occurrence.

While embodied moments make up life, most still seek a rational, “evidenced-based” approach to everything.

Some people even have epiphanies and say, “That was one of the most transformative _______ of my life,”
yet when they reintegrate with what they call their “real life”,
a life disconnected from the Body and actual True Physical Reality, they still choose the opposite of what the Body directly said.

It’s mind boggling and yet, this exists because our culture values words, statistics, “real world evidence” over non-verbal knowledge, authentic presence and embodied clarity.

I also love to remind people that for every issue, there will be ENDLESS amounts of info to support every side of a decision point.

And of course, we’re not suggesting that people stop reading, researching or anything like that,

We’re just saying it’s pointless to luxuriate in a sea of words if/when the Body’s aligned decision is so clear.

Embodiment is trusting your Central Truth over externalized systems of knowledge.

On my maternal side, my mother and her five siblings were the first generation in my family to be born in a hospital. My grandma was born at home in New Symrna Beach, Fl in 1918. When I asked my mom who attended her mother’s birth she replied, “they had a friend who assisted with birthing - a midwife per se, doctors were only for the sick and dying.” My mother also shared that her father and his five siblings were born at home, “standard practice was birthing on the kitchen table. My father’s parents carved the birthdate of each child onto the underside of the wooden kitchen table”. My grandmother was a midwife in Tennessee and Kentucky. When she moved to California, she was no longer able to practice midwifery due to unjust laws - she had been practicing midwifery for over a decade prior to moving to CA.

My mother was born in the White Memorial Hospital on Pennsylvania Avenue (downtown Los Angeles) in 1957. She shared, “The practice of midwifery was no longer acceptable in California at that time and few people birthed at home. It was very in-style and uppity to have a physician care for you. The doc that delivered my brother, sister, and myself was one of my parent’s best friends - he and his wife were Auschwitz survivors and continued to be family friends throughout my childhood.”

I was born at Fallbrook Hospital in San Diego, California in 1993 ~ I was raised in CA and it will always be my home. The OB that attended my birth as well as my sister’s was a friend of my mother’s.

I do not have children yet, but when I do I will birth outside in the woods of Northern California alongside the ancient trees.

A meditation

A simple guide for flowing through the laborinth ~~

What if you were birthing 300 years ago? What about 300 years from now? Should your once-in-a-lifetime birth experience be controlled/caged/jeopardized by the patriarchal systems of today?

We have the ability to break free from the collective Stockholm Syndrome that has engulfed western birth culture for generations.

We can think for ourselves, make conscious and informed choices, trust our bodies and our babies and shift the paradigm of birth towards love, freedom, and the power of our own innate wildness.

Posted •

The system loses the power to tempt you once you step into your power.

You can see right through the illusions and it loses its luster.

What it’s offering no longer appeals to you.

The more you reclaim your power, the less affected you are by the fear and control tactics.

The more you come home to yourself, the less you seek outside of yourself.

Desperately thinking you need someone or something outside of yourself in order to gestate and birth your baby is a result of the programming—underneath all of that conditioning is a woman connected to her primal power and the wisdom of her body.

Stepping into your power involves taking radical responsibility, unlearning all of the programming and building trust with yourself and your body.

It could sound like this in the context of prenatal care...

The system: But you need our technology to connect with your baby

Nope, I can connect with my baby on my own

The system: But you need us to tell you everything’s okay

Nope, I can determine that for myself

The system: But you need us and our drugs to save you from birth

Nope, I don’t need to be saved

You have the choice to exit the system—a system that profits off of this dysfunctional dependence that creates cycles of generational trauma for mothers and babies.

I always like to *clarify*: You can still be grateful that the medical system is there for the truly rare case of a birth emergency while opting out of industrial medical birth practices because you recognize that the current state of the system is profiting off of the abuse of mothers and babies and is in no way operating in integrity.

08.08.21
This New Moon reminds us of the endless supply of courage/power/strength contained within each of us

These aspects of ourselves may show up in different ways, weave in and out, feel more accessible + present in the mind/body on some days compared to others, but we are never at risk of running out

There is courage in trusting yourself

There is power in listening to the messages of the body

There is strength in being with all emotions that arise

~~~

With the seemingly endless array of external (and often unsolicited) opinions, recommendations, and instructions on how to take care of ourselves during the childbearing year and beyond, now is a beautiful time to look within for answers ~ to open the lines of communication with our own inner knowing

When we access our courage, we remember that we are intuitive + intelligent + sovereign beings ~ we are not only wise, 𝑤𝑒 𝑎𝑟𝑒 𝑤𝑖𝑠𝑑𝑜𝑚 𝑒𝑚𝑏𝑜𝑑𝑖𝑒𝑑

When we access our power and listen to the messages of our bodies, we are better equipped to set and sustain boundaries - to decipher what is and is not in alignment with each situation

When we access our strength and create the space to hold ourselves no matter what shows up, we have the ability to hold others in the same way

~~~

Today also marks the complete opening of the Lion’s Gate Portal, making this New Moon a supremely powerful time for manifestation

𝐼𝑛𝑡𝑒𝑛𝑡𝑖𝑜𝑛 + 𝑉𝑖𝑠𝑢𝑎𝑙𝑖𝑧𝑎𝑡𝑖𝑜𝑛 + 𝐶𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑡𝑖𝑜𝑛

~Affirmations for the New Moon~

Pregnancy/Birth:
I am the decision maker for my body and baby, I trust in and am guided by my own inner wisdom

All cycles:
Each day I step deeper into my sovereignty, I listen to and embody my deepest truth and wisdom

~Journal Prompt~
What does it mean/how does it feel to be autonomous?

𝐹𝑖𝑛𝑑 𝑦𝑜𝑢𝑟 𝑐𝑒𝑛𝑡𝑒𝑟 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑙𝑒𝑡 𝑖𝑡 𝑓𝑙𝑜𝑤
{love}letter

What if you were having s*x, on your way to an or**sm, and then a bunch of strangers rushed in your room, flipped on some bright lights, started touching you without your consent, telling how to do it and which position to be in, denying you anything to drink if you got thirsty, and threatening harmful drugs or major surgery if you couldn't make it happen? Would probably be pretty difficult huh? Here's a short Italian film applying current, routine hospital birth practices to s*x (The Performance, Freedom for Birth: Rome Action Group)

https://youtu.be/lZG0T7xHy6A

In honor of the full moon in Aquarius, I’d like to announce that Birth Garden Doula will be offering gifts through my
🌜news{love}letter🌛every quarter-moon phase. My first offering (free download when you sign up), is a soothing pregnancy meditation that I crafted with love. I’m having so much fun creating these, and will continue manifesting new ones whenever it aligns. Feel free to reach out with comments or questions, blessed be 🌕✨
Connect at birthgardendoula.com/

Prenatal care can look and feel like so many different things and can be much more than a visit to the doctor’s office. Prenatal care can really be viewed as what we offer to ourselves as nourishment in each moment. My friends over offered some insight that prenatal care is really not so different from self-care, and describes the ways in which we take care of ourselves during the childbearing year. It’s really about what brings us joy, what feels good, and what keeps our bodies and babies balanced, healthy, and grounded in love ~ It’s about what feels nourishing to our mind, body, and soul.

One of the ways we can nourish and connect with the deeper parts of ourselves during this time is to incorporate simple earth-based practices into our daily ritual. The Earth provides us so much wisdom, and being out in nature with our bare feet on the soil, or sitting for 20 minutes under our favorite tree is a beautiful way to open to all She has to offer.

In addition to the grounding/centering benefits our Great Mother bestows upon us when we share time with her, being in nature improves our overall mood and health:

🌿Reduces blood pressure, heart rate, muscle tension, cortisol levels (stress), inflammation, anxiety, depression
🌿Boosts vitamin D
🌿Enhances vitality + immunity
🌿Boosts creativity
🌿Improves concentration
🌿Improves sleep
🌿Improves sense of well-being
🌿Increases vibration
🌿Offers spiritual connection + communion

What are some ways you enjoy connecting with nature?

.
Powerful words + photo captured by

✨ Normalize birth as a personally transformative spiritual experience. ✨ Normalize hard ≠ bad. ✨ Normalize the messy, chaotic, loud, psychedelic, and joyful parts of birth. ✨ Wherever you have your baby, however your baby comes out, birth is so much more than a sterile medical event. ✨ Birth is sacred, birth is cosmic, and most importantly, birth belongs to you. ✨
**smicbirth