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Carlson Cane Corso

Ffs!! Just found the instructions that came with the dog!! Should have read them sooner

Dear Customer,
Congratulations
on acquiring your Cane corso. Please find the instructions for your model listed below:

Although your Corso comes fully assembled, due to particular issues during production, we do occasionally have issues with components such as screws. They invariably are either loose or missing altogether.

Mode 1: This is the sleep mode, activated for most of the day This is normal as your Corso ages, and you should not worry about it, just accept the peace and quiet while you can.

Mode 2: Anarchy. Although we have tried to ease the effect of anarchy mode, it’s not always possible. There are inherent issues with the timer settings of anarchy mode in regard to there being none. Should your Corso suddenly go from comatose to running around the walls, we cannot stop this feature.

Snow: Do not allow your Corso to stay in the snow too long. They can get to comfortable if left unattended, but they also recharge. Too much of a charge and mode 2 can be activated without warning.

Naming: your Corso comes untitled as we feel owners should use names of their own. If you are unsure, we have listed below a few names our owners like to use:

Drop it, I said drop it, drop it
No, no, no, no
What are you doing now?
Sh****ad
You’re kidding me
Is that yours?
Don’t you dare
Oi, you
As***le
Put that down
Why?
Di****ad
Ffs
Get that out your mouth.
Arhhhhhh ahh

Software: Your Corso is pre-installed with the highest software and hardware. This includes the loyalty chip, the love every one chip, fun chip and, of course, the highly popular mayhem chip. They are all running on the What-the-hell operating system 12.2. Although this has been in circulation for many years, we have found it simply cannot be improved upon.

Should you have any queries you can reach us on 118-what-did-I-do.

Thank you.

We hope you have many years of enjoyment with your Corso. Please be aware that by the time you have read this, your warranty will have run out. Unfortunately, we do not renew warranties and we do not offer refunds or returns...ever. It’s your problem now....... copied but my pic of my pack.