Styled with Strength

100% biased but we are convinced it’s the best girl gang out there ♥️

It seems unfathomable that Jaelyn lost her life at only 14 due to Domestic Violence at the hands of a former boyfriend.

We have a problem Fargo, and we sure hope you’re ready to fight alongside us.

A common thread with survivors of Domestic Violence is that there is often one noticeable person that makes a difference on their reach to safety. One person who finally sees them. That simply “gets it”

A 911 dispatcher, a responding police officer, an emergency room nurse, an observant teacher of their child, or a co-worker that creates a safe place.

but unfortunately a common bond these game-changers have is one thing: they have either personally experienced abuse or have navigated an abuser who was directly hurting someone they loved.

and that’s the tension.
that’s the hurt we want to avoid.
and that’s precisely where our work begins.

You shouldn’t have to endure the worst imaginable to provide compassionate care to strangers, it’s perhaps the biggest sign of how far off-base we are in Domestic Violence education.

Be curious, L•I•S•T•E•N, and don’t diagnose on first appearances- as with the most dangerous DV situations we know:

things are not always as they seem.

This week:

•We learned that Jenny is an absolute beast on the w**d whacker ✅
•We may have cut our landscape fabric with kids scissors that were found in Sara’s car ✅
•Taylor had a crash course in driving a monster truck ✅

but the best part you ask us?

Seeing this incredible team of fierce, busy, and strong women come together on behalf one of our amazing SWS families•••PURE MAGIC!

Thank you SO much to the Youth & Family Services Team at South-East Human Service Center for your time, love, and sheer lawn work bad-assery on Wednesday!

You are helping us to stand for safety while you continue to heal, grow, and enrich families throughout Cass County everyday!

Hi.
Last Minute Lucy’s Here 👋
Feel like taking a quick road trip today? We are looking for an incredible volunteer willing to pick up a special delivery for us in Bemidji, MN early this evening for our event tomorrow!

text or message us directly! 701-369-0351

Change is coming North Dakota!

Thank you to Jess for using her voice (and words!) to ask the questions that are on our minds.

Can we really claim to be North Dakota “Nice” when we are not protecting those who need it most?

Letter: Recent stories suggest ND is not safe for women Jess Arneson of Fargo responds to stories about the murder of Jody Campbell and a former state legislator accused of abusing his wife and children.

•••but how can there be so much 🅙🅞🅨 in an environment that already appeared to have lost so much?

because, that is what the opposition 🅦🅐🅝🅣🅢 us to believe isn’t possible.
it’s the thing a broken system 🅕🅔🅐🅡🅢 most.
it’s the one belief that an abuser can no longer 🅒🅞🅝🅣🅡🅞🅛.

because at the end of the day,
we are brave enough to believe:

•that truth still wins
•that an army of survivors is the most powerful force on this earth.
•that joy is still ours for the taking,

and above all:
that there’s plenty of 🅛🅘🅖🅗🅣 in the forecast.

We are so grateful that Caitlin, Nicole, and Erica from Blackbird Woodfire along with Jody's friend Wayne spoke with Tasha from Forum Communications to share the heart and generosity of the person Jody was, the joy she exuded despite the hell she was enduring at the hands of her abuser.

This article represents the true reality of navigating a broken system with a persistent abuser.
Right here in Fargo.

We must do more.

We must remember the goodness the community has lost at the hands of a very harmful person that shouldn't have been free to reign terror.

She Should Have Been Safe Here, Fargo.
We hope you'll join us in this important work.

Jody Campbell was a 'ray of sunshine' with a 'dark cloud following her,' friends say The victim of a murder in south Fargo last weekend had lived with the "plague" of Randall Duffy harassing, abusing, and trying to control her for more than a decade, her friends say.

Happy Father’s Day to the hard working, strong, and most of all- the safe Dad’s out there 🤍

You are helping to raise kind and courageous young boys who navigate and understand that true strength comes from genuine care, creating safe places, and protecting those in need.

-Styled with Strength

sisterhood
is like a growing vine,
it persistently seeks out the light
and keeps us connected 🤍

These sweet s-e-e-s-t-e-r-s sure made us feel special for our May Family Dinner!

Homemade daquiri’s, ice cream cone cupcakes, and so much food and love than we could ever imagine!

Thank you to the Stibal Sister Squad for your heart for the mission of Styled with Strength 💜

UPDATE: We have found someone to help!

Team Styled with Strength is looking for a local volunteer with the ability to install a Ring Doorbell Camera as soon as possible (preferably today)

Please call/text 701-369-0351 or email
[email protected]

We are so grateful to this incredible crew from Prairie Heights Community Church who brought their families together tonight in service! They created beautiful new client welcome baskets, and fun summer baskets for current SWS families!!! 🅣🅗🅐🅝🅚 🅨🅞🅤!

•Mr. Duffy violated his first protection order in ➊➒➒➒.
•His most recent charge was interference with an emergency phone call and disorderly conduct (but actually, domestic violence) in ➋⓿➋⓿.

➋➎ long years of documented abuse.

Our hearts are with the sister that was lost locally today.

It’s time to acknowledge we have a major problem, begin calling domestic violence: (domestic violence), and begin working to make women feel safe where they should feel safest of all:

In her home.

She Should Have Been Safe Here Fargo.

Our official donation site through DonorDock is live!!
https://styledwithstrengthfoundation.ddock.gives/
We would be honored and so grateful for your support as we continue to advocate, educate, and provide safe spaces for women and families who are experiencing abuse.

She will be safe here in Fargo because of you.

Good News Travels Fast!

We thought we recognized that cute spot!

We are so excited and honored to have received the DonorDock grant to streamline our donation process as we grow and build our fundraising muscle!

Stay tuned for an easier and more streamlined way to support the mission of the Styled with Strength Foundation!

Firm with West Fargo ties launches in-kind grant program to help small nonprofits improve fundraising In-kind grants are being offered to organizations nationwide, but at least two area nonprofits have been awarded a year's worth of assistance.

In an environment that every reaction, explosion, or moment that he takes it too far…

Does not happen because of 🅐🅝🅨🅣🅗🅘🅝🅖 you did.

It may be the latest viral question and social media trend, but the authentic answers of women when asked if they would rather be stuck in the woods with a bear or a man:

told the story we already knew.

We can have all the studies/data/ and prevention plans, but the fact that many choose a bear;
tells us just how far we have to go.

Good Things Happen Here!📍

An incredible evening building over 30 bouquets for the Mamas of Styled with Strength!

Thank you to the volunteers that joined us last night, we are lucky to be on this journey with you!

We are grateful to give the InForum a snapshot of life here at the shop! Day in and day out, we are reminded of the sacred space we get to hold around this counter ♥️

https://www.inforum.com/business/styled-with-strength-boutique-aims-to-help-abuse-victims-one-t-shirt-sale-at-a-time

True community creates and stands for safety and we need your help! 🏡

Our team is currently seeking a 2-3 bedroom rental in Casselton, ND for a family within our care. If you have any contacts or ideas- please email us at [email protected]!

•She may never walk through our shop doors.
•She may never be ready to share her story.
•We may never know her last name.

But because of an intentional co-worker who reached out on her behalf, she’s with us and she knows we are cheering her on in this season.

A brand new job (and promotion!) to support her family after reaching safety from their abuser calls for a giftcard to West-Acres and encouragement from a fellow survivor to ensure she walks into that first day confident and strong, knowing above all; that she’s safe.

As one of the first non profit organizations rooted in Domestic Violence Advocacy, Prevention, and Outreach in the City of West Fargo - Government we look forward to building a collaborative relationship with our local police department in the future.

We were disappointed to see that despite the only homicide within the city being a result of Domestic Violence, we were unable to find specific DV data or an outreach plan to best address this increasing problem within our growing city in the West Fargo Police Department’s annual report.

We get it, Domestic Violence isn’t a fun topic.

•It’s not a feel good data number I’m sure, but if we continue to avoid it; it will continue to grow in the darkness.
•Abusers thrive in their power of the unknown and we are determined to shine a light to not only honor those we were unable to save, but ensure we are running full speed to prevent anyone else from enduring this crime.

Just because we aren’t seeing it in the newspapers after the juicy details are revealed, or we are frustrated at having to visit a home multiple times for the same issue, or we don’t like talking about it, because it might open a wound we haven’t healed yet ourselves…

Doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist.

So I’ll reference our original reaction to the way our city responded to its only homicide in 2023.

and I’ll ask the same question:
When do we determine it’s upto us?

2023 West Fargo Police Annual Report:
https://westfargopolice.com/DocumentCenter/View/9544/2023-Police-Department-Annual-Report

https://www.styledwithstrength.org/post/sheshouldhavebeensafehere

When do we determine it's up to us? Reflecting on the loss of a local West Fargo mother who was murdered by the hands of someone she loved. How do we move from vague awareness to the next step?

I remember when I walked in the door that Christmas Eve, I had driven through a snowstorm trying to read my Mapquest (•••just dated myself) and also keep my Red Pontiac Sunfire on the road.

His mom was at the door, with an extra long squeeze and a whisper in my ear: “this is going to make him so much better, thank you for coming.”

That is something I already knew.

•I knew me driving all night and lying to my family about where I was going would make it better.
•I knew the fact that days before I had caught him messaging another girl but because I got to spend Christmas with his family would mean that “I won”
•I knew I would be on pins and needles while his family breathed easier and enjoyed the holiday.

Because I would carry the weight.

Every side-eye, trying to navigate his body language, “is that a real laugh or a fake one?” “Why does he keep texting?”

When an abusive person has a single target, the person’s presence does make the room a little bit lighter, but the room is also closing in on them.

So if your body is still wound tightly from enduring another holiday by saving the one person who’s hurting you,

We see you.
We love you.
We get it.
and we hope you know we are here when you’re ready for another path.

-team styled with strength

When one thinks of domestic violence, the Google image search doesn’t do us much favors does it?

The darkened shadowed images with mascara running down her bruised face…The scary fist lurking in the corner..

Styled with Strength hopes to break the narrative of the public’s perception of what someone experiencing abuse looks like.

Because who you think it is, couldn’t be further from what she actually looks like:

•She could be the friend that just got promoted.
•The one who can eat terrible food and still be a size zero. (A constant physical state of stress is doing the work)
•The one who always appears to have it all together.
•The one who always remembers your birthday.
•The friend that’s the first to ask you how YOU are doing.
•The friend that seems to have the perfect kids.
•The friend with the carefully curated Instagram feed and the picture perfect holiday photos.

Perhaps could we say that Domestic Violence isn’t hiding in the shadows, it’s standing right in front of us, demonstrating courage, resiliency, and a grit that goes beyond measure.

She could be the perfect friend.
Let’s shift our focus and begin to see and stand with her too ♥️

We are so grateful for our sweet friends at BIO Girls - Fargo, ND - Fargo All Stars who lived out their BE THE CHANGE mantra by making these beautiful blankets for our Styled with Strength families!

Each child that attended our February Family Dinner got to take home a brand new blanket made just for them!

We are so grateful for the incredible work that Bio Girls continue to bring to girls across the Midwest!

We are extremely grateful for the unwavering support that local police departments have in response to domestic violence in the F/M area.

•They are often the first safe space that a survivor sees and the first line of accountability to our criminal justice system.

•Including Domestic Violence data specifically in their annual report clearly shows Fargo Police Department’s commitment to protecting survivors. (Thank you!!)

Yet one major question remains•••

Why are only 45% of all domestic violence cases in relation to aggravated and simple assault charges, actually convicted as such?

We firmly believe that when our local police departments determine and assess probable cause for domestic violence charges, as a state and county; we need to then carry the torch to prosecute them as such.

Let’s not re-victimize someone who was saved by our incredible police force by allowing abusers to be convicted as if they got in a bar fight with a stranger.