Nest Postpartum

Mental load and busyness of life and being a mum feeling like you're Michael Scott doing Parkour...?

I've got 4 game changing tips for you to start doing straight away to help you find your rhythm and flow and ease that mental load mumma 🧡

Comment TIPS below if you want to know how to start feeling alive and happy again 🔥 not like you're drowning in all the things 🫠🫠

You're feeling burnt out, tired all the time, resentful from the constant pull of being needed, of holding all the information for everyone and to keep life just ticking over.

You feel like you're just getting by and you're over this s**t!

You are ready to take control and
💥 Lose the overwhelm,
💥 Overcome the burnout,
💥 Let go of the mental load,
💥 Heal that inner mean girl,
💥 Ditch the resentment, and
💥 Say goodbye to the mum-guilt.

Coaching with me helps you find
🧡 Your strength,
🧡 Know your worth and value,
🧡 Build up your resilience, and
🧡 Trust your mumma's intuition and gut

It's time to book your session with me now.

I don't believe in the story we're all told, that the feeling of mum-guilt is just part of the deal. That the unnecessary guilt that mothers are wracked with on a daily basis is fine just as it is. That's not ok.

Here's what I know, the definition of guilt is "that state of one who has done something wrong; blameworthiness; a feeling of responsibility for wrongdoing."

And what I see with my clients, friends, family and in myself is that we're all doing our best, winging our way through life and parenthood.

So where does mum guilt come from and why?
🧡It's all the tension we feel from all the decisions we make

🧡It comes up when we're comparing ourselves and start judging ourselves and our choices against someone else's standards and expectations

🧡It's that absolute b*itch of an inner critic focusing on our perceived wrong decisions and mistakes

🧡It's taking on the feelings of others as our own

So what what now? Well experience tells me this is the thread that starts the unraveling of this long held belief. When we call this out for what it is, complete and utter bullsh!t, we start to notice it more and can make the changes and shifts needed to live a sweet mum-guilt free life ✨🙌

Coaching one on one with me shares with you a system, a model, a routine, that guides you to a more joyful life 🧡 Hit the 📨 to book in.

Zoning out on your phone for hours o? If you're feeling frazzled and pulled and you don't have the energy to get what you need or move away from the stressor, so you disassociate by diving into your phone or laptop.

Finding loud noise stressful - When you're in stress mode, your body struggles to filter what noise is threatening, and what isn't, so you can feel hypersensitive to every noise, call of your name, the kids playing (and fighting).

Feeling irritated when friends reach out - let's be honest, keeping up with friendships and relationships can feel like another thing to add to the list when you're feeling overloaded and stretched across too many jobs.

Your brain is so full you can't switch off and rest - When you're overwhelmed, you have an increased level of stress hormone, keeping you feeling switched on and vigilant, ready to fight, flight or freeze. We need to feel safe in order to rest well.

Struggling to make small decisions like meal planning and deciding what to wear- When we're overwhelmed, the stress chemicals in our brains impact decision-making it harder to make decide.

I find it helpful understanding the little signals for when I'm overwhelmed, its so easy to overlook, especially when I'm overwhelmed and stressed. The things that would get my inner mean mumma berating me now prompt self-compassion, kindness and care. F*ckn game changer! 🔥

From the minute you woke up today, the day wasn't your own.

Not even waking up was on your terms - baby took that from you.

Breakfast was demanded by the toddler.

The morning race began: teeth, hair, dress, shoes.

There is wet washing in the machine on its 2nd cycle and 3 tubs of laundry piled high to put away.

Breakfast and last night's dinner and yesterday's lunchboxes

are spread over on the kitchen bench.

The floor could do with a vacuum too.

OVERSTIMULATED.

Do this:

PAUSE. It's that simple. Check in with yourself.

What does checking in look and sound like?

It's asking, why I feel this way right now?

Are there some imposed or assumed expectations I'm holding onto?

Is there an inner critic shaming me about the mess or the lack of care, or presence?

Is it because it feels like I don't have control?

Is it actually chaos and resetting the space around me would help reset my headspace?

It's helpful because it gives me enough space to decide what to do next, to come back to living right now.

Tell me in the comments below if you've tested out the Power Of Pause.

I remember so clearly watching other mums at the park when I first had Libby feeling like an imposter, because I didn't have clue what I was doing. I watched everyone and saw perfection from the way they moved around and interacted as women through to how they mothered. Does this imposter feeling ever happen to you?

Instagram lures us in with the highlights reels of everyone's lives and depending on our energy levels, our resilience, where our headspace is at that moment decides whether or not we have that capacity and ability to remind ourselves of the fact that everyone is living a life full of highs and lows and we hardly ever document and share the lows.

This is why resilience building, mindfulness and reflection is such a big part of what I support women with, the tools I give you and it's why I'll talk about it til the day I damn well die. Because it changes your whole damn life and the way you look at life, yourself and your kids and partner. It's simple and f*cking powerful.

I want you to have the confidence and ability to know perfection doesn't give you happiness and joy in motherhood and life. And I want to be the one to support you to taking ownership of your beautiful imperfect Queendom 👑

I'm calling it out so we can all make a conscious effort to change our habits and beliefs around martyrdom and self sacrifice in motherhood. None of it is real. No one is handing out awards or giving us the pat on our back for killing ourselves to be perfect and always doing.

Which AWARD has called you out on your own bulls**t? Mine is slides three, four and five! 😏

Are you ready to leave the mum guilt behind and never look back?

Think about how different your day would be if you dropped your child at daycare and on your way out the door as you waved to your little one was just excitement to start your day and see them later. ✨

Think about the lightness in your gut as you walk out the door while your partner is running the dinner - bath - bed show and you're going for dinner with your girlfriends. ✨

If you're ready to tell the mum guilt to F * * * right off then reply below with READY and I'll DM you with the steps to get it done. ❤️‍🔥

Let's not ruin each other and ourselves with the judgement and bullsh*t toxic positivity that we are not allowed to find mothering, parenting, learning on the job, all encompassing transition from life before baby to life after baby hard.

I know that the way we live is set up for us to feel alone, judged, overstimulated, over worked and under supported. Pulled in every direction and like what we feel and want does not matter.

If you want to find a new way of living, that changes your way of responding to situations, less triggered, less reactive, less hard on yourself, leaving martyrdom at the door, less resentment and guilt, I want you to reach out to me. It all starts with a simple thought. One conversation. Drop a 💚 in the comments to find out how you can get more of this ☝🏽

I’ve been exactly where you are…
There’s a reason AND it’s not your fault.
You USED to feel in control. You USED to know how to get sh*t done. You USED to feel accomplished at the end of your day.

Keeping up with the day-to-day; being a ‘good mum’ as well as a ‘successful woman’. IT’S A LOT.

You’re sick of always feeling a mess and/or losing it at your partner and your babies. This isn't the type of mum you thought you were going to be.

You’re tired of juggling it all, never feeling 100% there for your kids, partner, job, and I won’t even get started on being able to see your friends.

But, what if I told you, there is another way? And I know just what you need to get you loving your life, feeling like you're a bad bish 😜 who knows how to get everything she ever wanted out of motherhood, career, friendship and relationship. And you don't need to sell your soul to get it.

Drop a ❤️‍🔥below to learn how.

The expectation and pressure of being the perfect mother suffocates us. It sucks all the air out of enjoyment in the magic of the mundane moments with our babies, our partners, our lives. We spend too much time beating ourselves up because we didn't do the thing the exact way the perfect mother would do it. And this crazy pressure we put on ourselves does something to us. We're rocked with guilt no matter the choices we make.

When we learn the why behind this deep, intense desire for perfection and we start making changes to what we do I, we start to shift our beliefs, thoughts and mindset and next thing you know, you're sitting on your lounge floor with your family and you're there, loving every minute, feeling like you can and do have everything you need, that life is perfect and you are DOING IT ALL

I want to know if the "perfect mother" has robbed you of your joyful experiences. Tell me in the comments

What we do when we come together, it is your time to look at and reflect on the stories you tell yourself about who you are, what type of woman and mother you are and now you get to rewrite, redefine and remake your story and beliefs about motherhood and how damn good you are at it.

When I first became a mum I was so disappointed that I didn't "know" what I was doing. I was convinced someone would see right through me and laugh at my hopeless, clueless state and tell me that I didn't "belong".

I still feel like I'm guessing my way through motherhood but the difference is I've built up some key defences against this destructive thought process.

1. I have the reassurance from beautiful, amazing mothers around me that I love and trust and respect, their reminder that I belong has become part of my foundation. This is so important while we're new mothers and still building up our own bank of proof to ourselves that we know and are indeed amazing mummas.

2. I remind myself daily of my wins and my resilience and my ability to be exactly what my babies need. Being kind to myself isn't just a once a day practice, it's an "anytime I need it" practice and it is essential.

3. I have built up evidence over time that I belong here, as a mumma to my children. I am not the fraud I thought I was at the start.

Mumma, I tell you all of this because I know we all have a version of these thoughts and feelings and I want you know yourself better.

Beautiful words by

Pretty special reading words from an amazing woman I had the privilege of working with 💕✨

Seeing the resolution and confidence she came away with after our session together was the absolute thrill I LIVE for 🙌✨

When you begin to notice the difference between what you're feeling and what you believe to be true; what you're experiencing and what you thought the experience would be, is hard to get past.

I can be this support, I am here to help you take hold of everything you hope to be as a mother and woman and see you through to the other side of this vision.

When we work together for 1 session, we brainstorm and run through how you can make shifts yourself. ✨

When we work together for 3 sessions, we get to take action together. ✨

When we work together for 6 sessions, we get to see the life changing improvements these adjustments have on you and your loved ones. ✨

I am here to help you take hold of everything you hope to be as a woman and mother.

Availablity right now for postpartum doula support mummas 💕
Whether you're pregnant and looking for support in your first few weeks as a new mumma or a mum transitioning back into back and you know you're going to need additional support to help find balance and flow between work, self, partnership and motherhood, I'll be here to support you.

This: a visual representation through random iconic pop culture and inspirational posters of ways you will feel supported by me, doula and coach.

1. You: As Taylor Swift a la Eras Tour and Me: your back up singers and unwavering support. 🪩

2. You: Are Margot Robbie and me, America Ferrera whose own existential crisis gives her the knowledge to best support you to tackling your own troubles and world takeover. 💃

3. You: A brave sky diver jumping out of a plane and doing something scary for the first time in a long time and your (Me) experienced skydiving coach reminding you that you've got this 🪂

4. You: A trapeze artist taking the leap of faith and trusting yourself that you'll be ok, and me your dependable fellow trapeze artist catching you when you need it 🤸‍♀️

Doing something like dipping your toe in the waters of doing something for yourself as a mother will test and push and challenge you, and as a motherhood coach I will be right there with you, telling you that you've got this in those tough moments.

💞💞💞

"Life will never be the same again" my Mum tried to tell me.

But in my excitement, I couldn't quite grasp the gravity of those words. I couldn't fathom a world beyond your arrival.

I had no idea that there was to be a complete renovation. That I was to change, and grow, uncomfortably so. That the very ground beneath my feet would feel different.

No idea that hidden behind the illusion of seemingly domestic every-day-ness, something really quite extraordinary was happening to mothers everywhere. Boy, they hid it well.

I had no idea that the best was yet to come. That I would eventually find my feet again and emerge. Reborn. Re-animated. A mash-up of old and new. And yes, just like Mum said, never quite the same. A transformation at once disconcerting and freeing.

Sure, I grew you, birthed you, carried you. And carry you still.

But really, it was you, little one, that brought me to life.

Art by: Yarn Birdy

Words: Mother Truths

Taken from my book 'Lessons: Reflections on Early Motherhood' available to buy worldwide: https://linktr.ee/mother_truths

The time is now beautiful mumma to feel like you have a handle on what you're dealing with as a mumma, no matter what comes your way.

Join me for brunch and a planning workshop that will give you a practical routine to help you find rhythm and flow in daily life.

It feels like it's been decades to learn what the mental load is and how it is so heavily burdened on mothers shoulders, and up until this point there's been only been a few options for mothers 👇🏽
1. Dismissing and minimising your feelings completely. YUCK! OUTDATED AND DISAPPOINTING!
2. Acknowledging the mental load - validating the mental load is amazing but it's not giving you a desperately needed solution, right?!
3. Making the solution sit heavily on your shoulders, ironically, only adding to your mental load.

I'm here to say this, we're in the era of radical change, and women stepping into their own space and power. Let's shake things up, ✨ gently ✨ 😜 and create a routine and plan for your life that brings rhythm and flow to your day-to-day and ease that mental load! 🔥

You know what's not fair? The amount of pressure and expectation on you to do the things because you're a mum. I'm talking about the birthday party calendar, the kids growing and if they need new clothes yet, if you have enough milk and bread, dinner tonight, dinner tomorrow night and the rest of the week, something for lunches everyday. 🥴

Maybe you're also working a paid job God knows the pressure you're feeling on this front too. 😓

You're trying to parent mindfully, not explode or react when your toddler tests the boundary for the 633858603011485703 time that day 🫠 And while you're here doing this, you're also doing your best to breast or bottle feed as best you can and give them that perfectly balanced diet with just the right amount of junk food in that doesn't damage their relationship with food! 🫠

And now you're feeling, and possibly really desperately like you need to exercise, maybe it's that you "should" be back to your old self, maybe it's your body and mind screaming for something that's just for you. But regardless of that, it also feels like it's just more pressure sometimes.

And sometimes the list of things feel endless, and you're always rushing, and you feel like you're late, chasing your tail, forgetting something.

It feels hard, because this is a really hard way to live life, and it's just not right.

I see you mumma, I know you so well because this is me too. ❤️

The privilege of this work, to connect with women and mothers and share our stories with each other in the time I get to spend with clients, it's never lost on me or taken for granted.

Thank you beautiful mumma for trusting me, opening up and sharing. I am so grateful for you.

The thing with second (third, fourth, etc) time motherhood is you're armed with all this hard-earned wisdom. You're finally able to follow your instincts but the catch is you're afforded much less time to actually soak it all up.

I'm not distracted by the "shoulds" I suffered under the first time, I don't have time to entertain that crap anymore, but along with this, I feel like there's less time of me to physically give to my beautiful babies.

It's all about the quick feeds before we race out the door. The "I'll be there in a minute" calls. The rushing of life. The non-stop-ness of it all. Mind racing, tracking and making notes ahead to what each child needs next. My perpetual inability to relax.

I'm convinced this is why Tigs fed 4, 5, 10 times a night until well after he turned 1 and still wakes at the crack of dawn, smiling at me like he couldn't wait any longer. To make up for time lost during the day. It's our time together.

I desperately searched for systems and processes to bring peace to the chaos of everyday life. What I've found, in all the learning is something so surprising. Of course, I can keep going at 100 miles a minute, but I don't have to and I won't. I don't need to, I'm worth more.

I can make gentle shifts in energy and intention, the systems and processes I need can happen and equally as important need to include some key practices for myself: kindness, care, grounding practices, all essential to making the shift in seeing the systems and processes actually succeed. I can, and I will do this.

I want to hear from you, does this ring true for you too?

Let's stop being busy, running on the hamster wheel and feeling like we're treading water as mothers drowning in the mental load.

Let's find a routine that works for us and our families, set up some habits for ourselves, our partners and our children.

Let's workshop it together, discuss and brainstorm as a group, a collective of women, pool our resources, knowledge and experience and create practical, useful, sustainable and personal plans for ourselves at The Working Brunch.

The latest in my series of mother's events - a brunch date and workshop for pregnant women nesting and preparing for their next season and mums wanting a new rhythm and routine for life. Both types of women seeking more moments of presence, ease and joy.

Let's do this together.

✨Tickets $70 each, brunch and hot barista made drink, journal and workshop all included.
✨Monday 20.11.23, 10am
✨At Gather on Hay

Limited tickets available, on my website - link in my bio.
www.nestpostpartum.com

We are hardwired to seek out connection and as women, talking things through, relating, hearing others solutions, with other women is exactly what we need to do feel like we matter, like we are heard, like we are allowed to feel what we are feeling. That we are anything but different, alone, doing it hard.

Thank you a million times to the women in my life that I get to share my stories with, listen to theirs and us hold space for each. I love you. And I couldn't live my beautiful, messy, fun-filled, mundane but magic life without you all.

I'm here to tell you that a plan created and used to it's fullest, at any stage in your pregnancy, postpartum and general parental experience will see you living a life of ease, presence, joy and sheer magic, as much as hiring a postpartum doula would assist you in creating that magical newborn bubble.

Postpartum doulas are not fixers or fairy godmothers. A postpartum doula is a support that helps you achieve a beautifully balanced life that feels just right.

And I'm telling you, if you take the time to create a plan and set the intention to use the plan to its absolute most you will benefit as much.

If you could do this for yourself, would you? If you knew what you needed to do, to make this happen for yourself as a mum and woman, would you?

Drop some sparkles ✨ below if this is lighting something up inside you 🫶

✨It's been a minute since I've introduced myself and it's because I'm going through my own little remaking. Introducing myself with fresh energy and new vision and dreams for myself and the women I support. ✨

I'm a Postpartum Doula, Faciltator and Coach for Mothers, wife and mum to a 3 and 5 year old (when did that actually happen?!). I'm dedicated to supporting women to let go of doing it all, without guilt and shame.

I have always pushed myself to the limit, thriving on being busy and working under pressure. With this mindset I reached breaking point countless times as a new mum. In 2021, the mum of a toddler and a baby, I found myself overwhelmed, burn out, and depleted, trying to manage an autoimmune disease, and still trying to prove I could “do it all”. I knew that other mothers were going through similar experiences, which propelled me to work with women through their own motherhood experiences.

After nurturing mothers and their families as a postpartum doula over the last 2 and half years, curiosity and dedication to advancing support for women led me to qualify as an ICF (International Coaching Federation) accredited Mama Rising Facilitator and Coach. It has given me a deep understanding of the transformation mothers go through and I use my knowledge and experience to help mothers, find happiness, confidence and flow in day-to-day life without missing out, compromising on what matters, and burning out.

Women feel connection and comfort with my gentle and down to earth nature. I am the person you feel like having deep and vulnerable conversations that are as warm and steady as the hug we need after a long day, combined with the cheeky jokes and anecdotes and eyes wet from laughter that go hand in hand with motherhood.

If you're feeling overwhelmed, tired of the constant busyness, stress, restlessness or frustration of modern motherhood, or just need some guidance as your family grows, I will work with you to help you find your confidence, and satisfaction that is in alignsment with yourself as a woman and the mum you want to be. ✨

I've spent the last 6 months doing something incredible. Earlier this year I took the leap and applied joined the ICF accredited program with Amy Taylor-Kabbaz; a woman well-known, respected and celebrated for her work in an area I have become so passionate and excited about over the last 5 years: motherhood and the absolute strength and beauty of the transition of womanhood. I've been a doula for over 2 years, and I have supported a dozen incredible women nurturing and mothering their babies and children, and helping them handle the mental load from newborn haze through to juggling family, business and home life well after nappies are gone, I've got the privilege of being a mum to 2 children and all of this was the spark that has found my purpose and area of greatness.

When I was accepted into the Mama Rising course in March, I thought it was purely professional development - something more to offer my new and tired, over-worked, overwhelmed mumma clients but I've got so much more out of it.

Along with officially becoming an ICF-accredited Mama Rising Certified Coach and Facilitator, I am sitting here typing this out and pausing to celebrate who I have been in the past and who I am right now, which I can see (most of the time) thanks to the work I did in this program; - a determined, resilient woman in my quiet confident way. I've learnt that being me is a beautiful thing and to trust that I know the path ahead, and I'll tell you something - it's really, really exciting.

This very long winded post isn't purely celebration of my own efforts, it's an extra big thanks to my mum, husband, extended family and friends who have put up with me talking endlessly about the program in a jumbled up sort of way for the last 6 months, for putting extra hours in at "Nan's daycare", extra play dates with baby-club friends and skipping out on bath, story and bed times to make it to live coaching calls and prioritising my learning. I say it a lot but I'm grateful and thank the universe and the stars aligned for having you all in my life to make these kinds of crazy plans work for me.