Lana Alencar Counselling

What does your daily routine look like? Is there time for reflection, connection to people you love and care about? Is there time to check in with yourself and reconsider tasks and process emotions? Does it look like a constant pursuit of more and more? Or is it defined by contentment and calmness? Are you spending your time in something that brings you fulfillment?

Life is busy. There is a lot to do. In the midst of taking care of everyone else, remember to take care of yourself!

I will have a recess for the next two weeks.I will be back in the new year.
If you are struggling with mental health issues and are in need of urgent services, please call 18774357170 to get help or go to the ER.
To book an appointment for January, please go to the website lanaalencar.com or send me an email [email protected]
Have a wonderful time with family and loved ones. And don't hesitate to seek help if you need it.

Great reminder for today! Start the week embracing all the emotions you are experiencing. Name them. Feel them. Then decide what you want to do about it! Take the time to listen to yourself!

Do you feel disconnected at times? Postmodern way of living has brought many of us to a place of disconnection. We feel disconnected from ourselves, from God, from others around us. Meaningful relationships require real connection!

Did you know that having a pet can improve your mental health? It can reduce stress, anxiety, and depression, ease loneliness, encourage exercise and playfulness. Feeling emotionally connected to your pet, having the responsibility to care for them, and taking them for walks outside are some of the ways having a dog could benefit your mental health.
In the picture, meet Penny, my dog. She is the cutest!

If you have never experienced therapy, it can be so scary to start. Many clients share with me how surprised they were after a first session, when finding out that it was easier than they thought it would be. Don't worry about what you will say, or about having the rights answers. There is no such thing in therapy. Just come, let your therapist do the work of finding what you want to talk about. What is stopping you from getting the help you need? Go to my website if you want to find more about my approach to counselling. And if you are ready, let's give it a try!

Therapy is helpful for everyone. It provides you with a unique experience of being heard and understood. It can also help you clarify your own ideas and organize your plans for the future. Receiving insights and different perspectives from someone who has been trained to help others can be so powerful! This is a good reminder for all of us! Don't postpone taking care of yourself. Your mental health matters!

The past does not define who you are and what is in your future. It doesn't matter what happened to you, or the mistakes you made, there is always hope for a new beginning! If you are struggling and need someone to support you on this journey of new beginnings, seek help!

When was the last time that you really enjoyed contemplating nature, events in your life, or people around you?
There are many studies showing how contemplative practices can be beneficial to our mental health. Demonstrated benefits of contemplative practices include stress reduction, enhanced attention and awareness abilities, improved self-regulation and enhanced empathy awareness.
Activities such as Birdwatching, contemplating nature, Contemplative Prayer, Breathing Exercises, Meditation, Mindfulness, Quiet time, and Silence can produce long term effects on our brain.
Focusing on the beauty around us is a good way to start contemplating. Watch the birds, their uniqueness, the sounds, the details. Bring your mind to pay attention to the flowers, their colours, the smell, the freshness that they add to any place. As you connect more and more to the nature around you, you will find inner peace and that will help you overcome the challenges of life.

In a world where independence and individuality are so valued, we ask ourselves, what about interdependence?
Interdependence is mutual dependence, a state of being dependant upon one another. When applied to relationships, interdependence is when two or more people rely on each other for support. As much as we wish we could do it all by ourselves, interdependence it is a necessary and healthy part of our physical, mental, and emotional development.
It should not be so hard for humanity to understand and live this concept. Considering that we depend on nature for survival. We are born as totally dependent beings, relying on our caregivers for all areas of our existence, including emotional development.
However, because we live in a society that keeps telling us that we should do it all alone, and have all the answers, depending on others has become a sign of weakness. This is a lie! There is no emotional health without connection to yourself and others. We cannot simply choose to isolate ourselves from everyone in order to avoid conflict and have it all on our terms. We need each other, it our nature! We were created for relationships, we were created for connection, we are interdependent beings!

So many times we feel threatened by our emotions! The fear is that we might not be able to take control over our emotions, and scared of being overwhelmed by them, we tend to avoid the feelings. However, we are just postponing having to deal with our emotions. They are still there, and at some point you will probably explode, either in a breakdown or anger episode. Another possibility is that in order to numb some emotions, you end up numbing them all.

Emotions are a gift! They have a purpose and a role in our mental health. When we learn to feel the emotions, and to process them, we take control and are more able to self-regulate. How can you ever control something if you just avoid it all the time? Be brave, feel the emotions, understand and learn from them! As always, remember to ask for help if you need!

When was the last time that you felt rested and relaxed? Energized and creative? Most of us are living by default, doing whatever we believe we are supposed to do. The society has conditioned us to believe that busyness and multi-tasking are a sign of effectiveness, and that vitality is acquired by activity. The focus is on "doing" as opposed to "being". This culture has led us to burnout, anxiety and depression. It is time to stop and ask ourselves the reason for all of that. Rest, Reflect, and Decide to Change.

Are you stuck somewhere in the past? Are you struggling with relationships, wishing you could change people around you? Are you trying to control every circumstance, just to make sure you are prepared? Have you considered letting go of this need to control, moving on from the past events of your life, and giving up trying to change others? Ask yourself what you can really do in those situations. The most important change is changing how we understand and react to the challenges life brings us.

There is substantial evidence that contact with nature has beneficial effects on both physical and mental health. A great way of connecting to nature is gardening. And the benefits of gardening for our mental health are incredible. On top of breathing fresh air, getting some sun light, and moving, there is great satisfaction in getting simple tasks done. There is a sense of well-being when you walk through the garden and see the growth and the changes that nature and nurture provide. We can apply that to our own life, because nature and nurture can change us, and help us grow as well!

Studies suggest that huggging can reduce stress hormones, lower blood pressure, boost heart health, and reduce inflamation. Hugs also promote the production of oxytocin, known as the "love hormone", an important hormone that serves as a stress buffer, but also helps us feel connected and bonded to others.

What are you waiting? Go hug your loved ones!!!

It is already so difficult to live trying to reach our own expectations, which are often too hard to achieve. On top of that, we want to live up to other people's expectations! Unfortunately, our society honours and values those high expectations, and we lose our identity trying to prove to be good enough! Let's go back to finding the beauty of our unique self!

If you need help on this journey, talking to a therapist might be a good starting point.

Relationships need care.
We all struggle in our relationships from time to time. Facing changes in our relationships can be difficult, because as much as we want to make it work, sometimes we get stuck. Problems in communication, finances, parenting, sexual intimacy are some of the issues that couples can face. Therapy can help you heal and grow in your marriage.

Life has its challenges
As life goes on, we all face challenges. Sometimes, changing from one stage in life to the next can be scary. It can be the end of a relationship, a new job, changing of schools, the loss of a loved one. It is okay to need help. I am here to help you understand what has happened and what are the next steps you want to take. Sometimes we just need someone to listen without judgement. It is brave to seek help when you need!