Stronger Relationships

https://www.theredhandfiles.com/my-oldest-child-just-turned-19/

Nick Cave - The Red Hand Files - Issue #239 - My oldest child just turned 19. When they were born, she was called Maisie. They are now calling themself Claude and using male pronouns. I struggle with it out of habit. I understand intellectually,... Dear Damon, This beautiful love letter to your child is full of a common sadness that many parents feel when we lose our children to the...

If you've got some time and space, I can highly recommend this.

Mindful Parenting and Emotional Wellness - FREE Online Conference Free Conference - Mindful Parenting and Mental Wellness - October 14-18, 2021

Another great book from Molly, who tackles the tricky stuff simply!

My most recent book certainly instigated some interesting conversations with the children I have read it to! It's definitely a book for adults to share with their children.

Wise words from Molly. Her books are brilliant. Find them here: https://www.mollypotter.com/

It's important not to label emotions as 'good' or 'bad' with children. It's much better to use: positive and negative, comfortable and uncomfortable or my favourite: enjoyable and unenjoyable. If a child receives the message that feeling angry or jealous (for example) is 'bad', they will not only feel the emotion, they will feel some shame for feeling it ('I am bad for feeling anger'). Likewise, although feeling happy can be pleasantly infectious, it is better not to praise a child in any way for being happy as they will unrealistically attempt to be happy all the time to gain approval. It's far better to accept all emotions, without judgement, as just part of being human. Doing so makes all emotions acceptable so we're less likely to suppress them and gives us a better chance of more consciously managing our behavioural responses when experiencing unenjoyable emotions.

https://www.madinamerica.com/2022/06/uk-iapt-abject-failure/

The UK’s IAPT Service Is an Abject Failure - Mad In America Despite the hype, the IAPT is hardly “world-beating.” In fact, it is a doubtful model for other countries to follow.

"Where intensive parents are carpenters, hammering children into a particular shape one stroke at a time, gardening parents pour their labor into creating preconditions of “love, safety, and stability” for their kids to grow in potentially unpredictable ways."

https://www.theatlantic.com/family/archive/2022/05/intensive-helicopter-parent-anxiety/629813/

A Fine Parent

Foxley bluebells.

Free resources from the Institute of Child Psychology. https://instituteofchildpsychology.com/resources/

Resources Archive - Institute of Child Psychology Join ICP Co-Founder, Tammy Schamuhn, in this free webinar that provides parenting tools to promote emotion regulation in children.

This conference is always good (and free, if you're prepared to stay up for EST). https://conference.happilyfamily.com/hf-conference-signup-mh/

Happily Family Online Conference Free Conference - Mindful Parenting and Mental Wellness - October 14-18, 2021

County lines webinars for professionals/parents/carers. These are being provided by the St Giles Trust, for free, on 21st and 28th April. Register using the link below - it looks dodgy, but it isn't!

https://i.emlfiles4.com/cmpdoc/4/9/8/0/8/files/877044_sos-parentcarer-webinars---april.pdf?dm_i=1QF2,7T8IK,50NNXH,VVH9A,1

i.emlfiles4.com

Make sure you have your say on Norfolk's Youth Strategy! Norfolk County Council wants to hear from all young people...

From BJ Woodstein: I'm really proud to announce that my newest book is now available. It's called We’re Here! A Practical Guide to Becoming an LGBTQ+ Parent, and it is aimed at anyone who is or wants to be an LGBTQ+ parent, and anyone who supports us, whether as an ally or in a professional role, such as lawyers, midwives, lactation consultants, doulas, social workers, and so on.

There are dozens of stories in the book from LGBTQ+ people, telling you what they did and why, and also from professionals who work with us.

Please check it out: tinyurl.com/5n6z2bzn And if you find it useful, I'd be grateful for a review, whether online or in print.

Thank you to everyone who contributed to the book! And thank you to my amazing wife, Fi Woodstein, as there's no one I'd rather be an LGBTQ+ parent with.

We’re Here! A Practical Guide to Becoming an LGBTQ+ Parent by B.J. Woodstein Books on Women's Health

The first rule about Imposterism is to talk about Imposterism.

A thing of beauty is a joy for ever:
Its loveliness increases; it will never
Pass into nothingness; but still will keep
A bower quiet for us, and a sleep
Full of sweet dreams, and health, and quiet breathing.
Therefore, on every morrow, are we wreathing
A flowery band to bind us to the earth,
Spite of despondence, of the inhuman dearth
Of noble natures, of the gloomy days,
Of all the unhealthy and o'er-darkn'd ways
Made for our searching: yes, in spite of all,
Some shape of beauty moves away the pall
From our dark spirits. Such the sun, the moon,
Trees old and young, sprouting a shady boon
For simple sheep; and such are daffodils
With the green world they live in; and clear rills
That for themselves a cooling covert make
'Gainst the hot season; the mid-forest brake,
Rich with a sprinkling of fair musk-rose blooms:
And such too is the grandeur of the dooms
We have imagined for the mighty dead;
An endless fountain of immortal drink,
Pouring unto us from the heaven's brink.
John Keats

Food for the soul.

Day 3. Mindset Programme. No room for bull.

My first article for Life Coach Directory. The first lesson of empathy is becoming aware of our tendency towards autobiographical listening.

Do you know an autobiographical listener? Relationship and mindset coach Andrea Rippon shares how active listening can improve your relationships.

Thank you and . I'm going to do this and REBOOT, refresh, update my values & beliefs and refocus my attention! Yeehah! 🤩

This looks useful. https://www.internetmatters.org/digital-family-toolkit/ UEA's Health and Social Care have just developed an online training programme for the site, called Fostering Digital Skills.

My Family's Digital Toolkit - tailored online safety advice | Internet Matters Every child is different with their own online interests and activities. We created a simple tool to provide tailored advice to meet family's digital needs.

BEING ME - Learning Conversations. An online event, tomorrow (Mon 28/2) between 1-3pm. Self select fee. https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/learning-conversations-being-me-andrea-rippon-tickets-228240542607

We start by sharing stories in a safe, facilitated space. By bringing our experiences into awareness, we learn about ourselves. By listening, we learn about others. This increase in awareness establishes where we are now – and allows us to explore alternatives.

With the right level of challenge and support we see ourselves as an open-minded observer. This helps us consider different ways of thinking, feeling and behaving. We can understand what works and what doesn’t.

This is action-learning, which encourages accurate self-assessment and an increase in flexibility, adaptability and, ultimately, authentic change.

Learning Conversations: Being Me - Andrea Rippon Learning Conversations: Being Me Workshop with Andrea Rippon

One of my core values is 'whatever works'. I know war doesn't work; but I'm glad to see the water meadow at Marston does.

Broken trees blossom.

Marking assignments again - and here's a great quote. It really resonates with me. ‘I realize that if I were stable and steady and static, I would be living death. So I accept confusion and uncertainty and fear and emotional highs and lows because they are the price I willingly pay for a flowing, perplexing, exciting life.’ Rogers, C. R (1980:89) A Way Of Being. Boston : Houghton Mifflin. 1995

Dog walk.

Facilitating another Encounter Weekend at Ditchingham. Always so unbelievably fulfilling (and exhausting).

Chuffed to be a Clementine Mindset champion - and to share a page with these amazing women. Take a look.

Clementine is an app that supports women with their Mindset/sleep, etc. I can offer 10 women a free one-year subscription. Is this something you'd like (and would you use it most days)? If so, let me know in a private message.
https://champions.clementineapp.com/about?mc_cid=f4633c2d2a&mc_eid=553df16900

Meet The Clementine Mindset Champions

The next workshop in my Parenting Knowhow series is on 19th February (Saturday, 10-12noon). Link for tickets (self select fee) is here: https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/.../parenting-knowhow-2... Please feel free to share this post with anyone who you think might benefit. (The parenting approach is person centred, authoritative, high on warmth and discipline, with an aim towards building respectful and considerate relationships).

Eventbrite None

Corporate work = different cities, beautiful spaces.

From co-dependency to being inter-dependent. This is a well written article, which can serve as a helpful reminder to us all about personal responsibility.

How I Stopped Trying to Control My Partner and Took Responsibility for My Own Happiness Coach Hailey Magee shares her personal story of trying to save a relationship, breaking up, and rethinking the illusion of control.

On Monday! Imposter Syndrome Workshop with Andrea Rippon. This workshop will cover the Myths, the Realities and the Research. We’ll look at how Imposterism feels, who experiences it and whether it can be useful. We’ll look at how Personality affects our predisposition towards Imposterism and we’ll explore the difference between Identity and Competence. We will then briefly look at some strategies for coping with Imposterism, so that we can realign our beliefs, work with our brains (rather than against them) and find ways to achieve our potential. Monday 17th Jan. 1300-1500. Self select fee.
https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/imposter-syndrome-andrea-rippon-tickets-228019722127

A set of 6 workshops exploring Parenting with a Person Centred Approach. There's a self-select fee. Please click on this link to enrol. (And please share this post!)
https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/cc/parenting-knowhow-2-andrea-rippon-79159

Parenting Knowhow 2 - Andrea Rippon A Set of Six (6) Workshops held Monthly

Marking assignments - always a great way to pick up some cracking quotes. Here's one:

‘Developing congruence can be a hard path. It means letting go of blame and recognising our own responsibility’

Tolan, J. (2017:47) Skills in Person Centred Counselling and Psychotherapy Third Edition: Sage Publications

Do your New Year intentions include learning something new? Or focussing on your own development? Or improving your relationships? There's an Introduction to Person Centred Counselling Skills starting on 20th January - ONLINE. Thursday mornings, for 8 weeks. £300pp. Only a few places left. It's a way of being, not doing...being with another person, so they can figure how they feel and what they want to do about their distress. The skill is to listen people into voice, to trust them to take responsibility for themselves, to build psychologically healthy relationships and to empower them. To achieve this you will need to know yourself and to accept yourself, so much so that you can take a back seat and make room for the other person and how they do things. This course is suitable for personal and professional development. DM me for more info.

Happy Christmas everyone.